| |
She’d never looked prettier than sitting there in the passenger seat of his SUV and telling him what a bastard he was. Clay wanted to tell her that. To explain that he’d never wanted her to feel like she didn’t measure up. That she was probably the best deputy he had.
But she was the one he most wanted to protect. Because of him and how he felt about her.
Hell, he’d known he was in love with Bailey months ago. Those thirty hours she’d been missing had just nailed that into his thick skull.
They pulled into the Finley Creek TSP’s new parking lot, and he killed the engine. He didn’t speak again until they were on the sidewalk in front of the FC TSP entrance. "I just didn't want you in my precinct."
"But why? That's all I want to know. Give me one good reason why, then I’ll leave you alone. If it’s good enough, I’ll tell Chief Marshall right now that I accept his offer. Then you’ll not have to deal with me again." Blue eyes the same damned color of the sky stared right at him. Punched him straight in the gut and squeezed his insides.
He'd put that hurt there. Time and time again, he had hurt her.
By being a total ass when he didn't need to be.
He stepped up to her, blocking her with his much larger body.
He half thought she was going to keep walking, just to prove he wasn't bigger and stronger and in her way.
Thank God Bailey had that stubborn streak. It had kept her alive all those months ago. Clay wrapped his fingers around her elbow and stopped her.
When a man got ahold of her, that was when it really sank in just how small she was. Small, brave, beautiful. And hurting. Because of him. It was time he manned up and made things right. "I didn't want you here...because...because you distract me."
He knew what question was coming before her lips formed it. “What?”
"It's your perfume. The way you laugh. The way you love kittens and lemonade. The way your hair...it catches the light from the window right over your desk. Sometimes you'd sit there and I'd get distracted by the gold. When you were gone, I had to move your desk. To where I couldn't see that you were not there. You distracted me when you were in the office, and even when you weren't. From the first moment you walked in. You haven’t stopped since."
He stormed away, leaving her gaping at him. He felt like a damned fool—and like he’d taken that first step over the edge of a great precipice.
It was going to be his own fault when he finally hit rock bottom.