SO THIS IS what's been going on," Ki-yong says, sitting next to Song-gon, handcuffed. Song-gon is like an actor who just stepped off the stage after a performance. The disguise is still there but he's acting completely differently from his stage persona. His inarticulate bumbling mannerisms are gone, and his bad posture is nowhere to be seen. He's still bald but now it looks like the symbol of a confident winner.
"No wonder. I had no idea you were behind it. I just thought that everything happened really easily for me. There's no way that banks would be that lenient in real life. I thought it was because I was good, smart, and adapted really well to capitalism. I can't even begin to imagine what you guys would have been saying about me, jeering behind my back." Ki-yong is calm.
Song-gon reassures him. "It wasn't exactly like that. You did well for yourself too, sir. A couple of our movies managed to draw a big audience. You didn't have any big hits, but you did have a few medium hits."
"No, no. Capitalism isn't that easy. Right? But good job with the acting, Song-gon. I really didn't catch on."
"No, it wasn't acting. This persona you're seeing right now, this is an act. At the office, I just acted the way I do when I'm at home, watching porn and picking my nose and napping. I was in a theater group for a little while in college, and they used to say that when you act, you're not creating something that doesn't exist, you're really discovering something within yourself."
Ki-yong isn't in the mood to sit there as if nothing is happening to him, listening to stories of Song-gon's brave exploits. He feels as if a snake were crawling up his throat. "You asshole."
"What?"
"You're an asshole."
Song-gon doesn't say anything.
"Admit it!"
The muscles in Song-gon's face stiffen. "I was just doing my job."
"That's why you're an asshole. You just do your job without thinking about what the consequences are. That's exactly what an asshole is," Ki-yong retorts, staring straight into his eyes. Sitting there in the dark, he can sense every tiny movement, the tension rippling through Song-gon's muscles. "I can't believe you guys were working behind the scenes all these years and I didn't suspect a thing..."
"I really am sorry about that," Song-gon says, in a way that doesn't sound like he is sorry at all. He sounds like a government official dealing with an annoying, complaining citizen. In this formal, polite man, Ki-yong is unable to glimpse the Song-gon he has known for years—the Song-gon with bad credit and the porn addiction.
"You know you would have done the same thing if you were in my shoes, sir."
"Yeah, I guess so."
Only now does Ki-yong start to understand why Order 4 was issued. He thought the order came down because a workaholic successor of Lee Sang-hyok had come across his file. A successor with a strong loyalty to Party ideology and obsessive-compulsive disorder. Stumbling across Ki-yong's file, he would have wondered why Ki-yong was stranded in Seoul, and ordered his return. But maybe, for the past few years, the North and the South have engaged in an intense but frighteningly silent tug of war with him in the middle. He's like a trap for roaches—stuck deep in the corner under the sink, believing he's isolated from everything, but all the while emitting a scent into the world, signaling his presence. He was neither harmful nor harmless, but at some point, though he didn't notice it, the subtle balance of power between the North and the South that had been maintained for years was destroyed.
Of course, these guesses could be completely wrong. All he knows for sure is that he didn't know anything, and the fact is that he still doesn't know anything.
Another voice rings out from behind Ki-yong. Song-gon gets up and awkwardly greets the man. Song-gon doesn't sit back down, and the man motions with his chin, signaling that he should go away. Song-gon leaves the bench shaded by the wisteria vines.
"Hello, it's nice to meet you. My name is Jong. My men call me Supervisor Jong." Jong introduces himself and settles down next to Ki-yong. He takes out a bag of pistachios from his pocket and holds it out. "Would you like some?"
"Please, try one. They're from California; they're especially tasty if they grow in dry climates. They have to be hard and firm on the outside but moist on the inside."
"Okay then." Ki-yong takes some pistachios in his hands, shells them, and tosses a few into his mouth.
"You've lived in this neighborhood for a while now, right?"
"About five years."
"You must have enjoyed the rising property values in this neighborhood."
"Well, a little. Not as much as in Kangnam, of course."
"I bought a house in Chunggye-dong four years ago. It's about forty pyong, and prices have risen quite a bit because the neighborhood's known for its good cram schools."
Silence envelops them, broken only by the crumpling of the pistachio bag and the sound of Jong biting into the nuts. Several more students walk past them.
"I understand you have a daughter?" Jong inquires politely.
"Yes."
"Is she a good student?"
Ki-yong drops the pistachio shells on the ground near his feet. "Yes, she's pretty good. She's like her mom, smart."
"I have a son, and he's so crazy about basketball that he won't sit still with books. It's a big source of worry for me," Jong confides.
"Well, if he's talented at it..."
"If he had some talent it would be ideal, but that's not really the case. By the way, your wife is quite a beauty."
Ki-yong looks at him, puzzled.
"Oh, no, don't take it the wrong way. We were waiting near your wife's work because we thought maybe you'd come see her there. She probably didn't even notice that we were there."
Ki-yong closes his eyes and thinks about Ma-ri, lying on her back, legs spread open, two guys having their way with her. He opens his eyes. He wonders if those scenes were broadcast live to an unknown place, like a reality program. "If I were to turn myself in...?"
"We'll arrange it so that you do it with the two others."
"The two others?"
"Oh, please don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about. This kind of thing is a lot like filing your taxes. You can file by yourself, but that's not as advantageous as it could be. You know what I mean, since you're a businessman, right? You just have to think of us as the accountant. If you leave it up to us, we'll take care of you. You just have to understand that you will have to pay a fee."
"A fee?"
"But it's win-win for everyone. You know how they talk about revealed comparative advantage in international trade? That's the kind of thing I'm talking about. You give us what we need, and in return we'll protect you, our client. That's the kind of thing we're good at."
"Is that really true?"
"If we work together and help each other out, everything will be fine. Even if they were to send people down south—which they may or may not do because they're running out of American dollars—or if the prosecutors' office senses something. Especially since, as you know, this isn't a standard criminal case."
If anyone were to overhear them, they would think this is a conversation between a corrupt corporation and an accountant, scheming about cooking the books.
"So is Han Jong-hun with you too?"
Jong grins and bites down on a pistachio shell, emitting a loud crack. "Of course. It's not like he's so special that he doesn't need us."
"So nobody's gone back?"
"Not that we know of. You never know, though, because this world's always shrouded in fog," Jong explains.
Two men wearing black jackets come forward and whisper to Jong, who nods and orders, "Okay, tell them to stay in their places. We're not done yet."
The two men bow and walk away.
"I guess the boys are a little cold," Jong explains.
"What's going to happen to me?" Ki-yong asks, looking down at his handcuffs.
"It depends on what you decide to do. If you decide to do the right thing, it's all going to be over quickly."
"So if you investigate and discover that I've done a lot of bad things, what happens?"
"We're not a church."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean that we're not the kind of place that will absolve you of the crimes we didn't know about."
"So what will happen to me?"
"First, if you have committed any crimes we have to know about them. Then we move on to the next step."
Ki-yong raises his head. "Why aren't you taking me into custody? Why are we still sitting on this bench?"
Jong smiles. "There's still something you have to do. The show must go on, as they say."
Song-gon and Jong speak in identical theater analogies. Why are they acting like this? Are they making fun of him with stupid jokes about college theater troupes? Is this their entertainment, or is it a tool to whittle away his wariness? Or are they just trying to convince him that all of this is only a play? Why are they doing this? Maybe they are actually afraid of Ki-yong, the victim. Like the chief priest in ancient times who performed sacrifices, they might be terrified about empathizing with the being that is to be sacrificed, worried that they will become emotionally damaged. They might be distancing themselves from this situation where a man's life is dangling by a thread, by making idiotic jokes and awkward analogies, wearing forced smiles. When Ki-yong thinks of it that way, he pities them, and feels freer, though only a little bit. For the first time since this morning, he can step away from the torrent that has swamped him and look down at the situation from a different, detached place. How could anyone be free of fear, just because he works for the government? It must be stressful for you guys, too, to have to deal with this crap.
"What do I have to do?"
Jong takes out a black digital watch from the inner pocket of his jacket. "You should wear this watch. It's an electronic bracelet. Once you put it on, it's hard to take it off, and in any case, it'll send us a signal the instant you try to remove it. See, it looks exactly like a watch. It's really light, too, so you shouldn't have any problems on a day-to-day basis. Of course, it also works as a watch and has an alarm function."
The watch has CASIO written on its face.
"Why aren't you taking me in right now and interrogating me?" Ki-yong asks.
"Oh, there's no reason to rush into it. We can tackle it slowly, step by step. After tonight, you can just go back home and act like you usually do. That's it," Jong explains.
Ki-yong bolts to his feet, and hears a sudden flurry of rustling in the flowerbeds, the sound of tree branches brushing against clothing. A few more men must be hiding there. "I can't do that," Ki-yong exclaims.
"Why not? Your family must be wanting you to come home."
"I already spoke with my wife. I told her everything," Ki-yong says firmly. He can't go home.
Jong tosses some pistachios into his mouth. "Yes, I know. I'm sorry, but we heard a part of your conversation."
Ki-yong flushes. "Then how can you ask me to go home after hearing all of that? I can't."
"You must. Don't you think you need to be there for your daughter?"
Ki-yong is quiet for a moment. Does Hyon-mi really need him? "My wife will do a good job raising her."
"Yes, but it's still a very important time in her childhood."
Ki-yong sinks down on the bench. "My wife wants me to go back north. You heard what she said."
"I'm sure she just said that because she was mad, and as you can see it's impossible for you to go back north."
"Well, she's not your wife, is she? I know her better than anyone," Ki-yong says, getting angry.
"Of course, of course," Jong says in a conciliatory tone. "But think about it from her perspective. She didn't know this about you for fifteen years. It's an understandable reaction. But you're married. Like they say, a fight between a married couple is like slicing through water with a sword."
Ki-yong doesn't reply. Jong sits there without saying anything for a while. He throws away the empty pistachio bag. The ground is covered with pistachio shells. He takes a cream-filled pastry out from his pocket and rips open the plastic wrapper. "Excuse me. They cut out a part of my stomach because of cancer, and now I have to eat constantly like a starving man," he explains.
"No, go ahead," Ki-yong says.
Jong bites off a chunk of the pastry and chews. Ki-yong tosses in his mouth the remainder of the pistachios Jong gave him, the nuts having turned damp in his sweaty palms. It doesn't taste like much of anything. "Supervisor Jong, I don't think you understand what kind of man Kim Ki-yong is," Ki-yong says.
"What do you mean?" Jong asks.
"When I was in junior high, when I was sixteen years old—I was Hyon-mi's age—I came home to find my mother had committed suicide. After that I had a hard time going home ... You probably don't know what that feels like. Your house feeling like a prison, that really is a terrifying thing. I don't know why I'm telling you this, but even now, sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night, thinking that I'm in the Pyongyang apartment I grew up in. In my dreams I'm still sixteen."
"That must be very difficult."
"There's no need for you to be sarcastic. I think the most important part of being a parent is to create as many beautiful memories as possible for your children. But I haven't been able to give that many to Hyon-mi—maybe I haven't been the best dad. I think that the even more important thing about being a parent is not to give any horrible memories to a child. This is why I don't want to do it. I don't want to hurt my daughter by going home, digging into my wife's affair, arguing and attacking her, which would lead to her attacking me—revealing everything—and end with our hating each other. Do you understand? My wife's right. If I'm the only one who gets sacrificed, everything will be fine."
"I do know what you mean. But it all depends on how you do it. You have to go back home."
"Look, I'm telling you I can't!" Ki-yong shouts, frustrated.
Jong looks uncomfortable. "Okay, okay, calm down, Mr. Kim. I'm already convinced, really. Believe me. But I'm just the low man on the totem pole at the Company. Do you know what I mean? I'm just the messenger."
Ki-yong is momentarily taken over by a fantasy of all the blood in his veins flowing slowly, like thick porridge. A pervasive sense of powerlessness sticks to his skin like wet clothes. He can't figure out how to fight, with whom to argue, or even discern where the end to all this may be. Perhaps this is the beginning of the end. If he acquiesces to these demands, he has the feeling that he will, like Kafka's characters, busily and repetitively wander through a complicated maze, experiencing events that are tragedies for him but ridiculous comedies for everyone else. These men will observe him and his every act in a detached way, like biologists studying animal behavior, watching him mate, raise his young, work, and play. "So you're saying that I have no choice in the matter," Ki-yong says.
"Yes, exactly. For now, you should just go home. I mean, married life has its good parts and bad parts, right? Marriage is all about living together despite knowing each other's faults, overlooking them and understanding each other. So you should go back, work on the problem, and just live like you always have."
"Like I always have? Do you really think that's possible after this?" Ki-yong's voice betrays bitterness.
Jong isn't moved. "Of course it is. This is a bit embarrassing, but at the beginning of my marriage, when my wife got pregnant—you know, you can't really sleep with your wife when she's pregnant—I was sleeping with another woman and got caught. Well, I was actually sleeping with my sister-in-law, my wife's sister. It just happened, somehow, I don't know. These things happen, you know? Obviously it was a huge deal. Even now I have no idea how my wife found out. She went crazy, screaming at me that she'd get rid of the baby. But now, you'd never know that happened. I'd like to tell you, as someone who's lived a few more years than you have, it all tends to work out in the end."
"What happened to your sister-in-law?"
For the first time since Ki-yong met Jong, he hesitates, opening then closing his mouth without saying anything. But he starts speaking again. "She committed suicide. Oh, no, don't get me wrong, it wasn't because of that. Her husband ran a business, manufacturing parts like bike pedals and seats, but it went under so their whole family took poison and killed themselves in a motel room. The kids were really cute..." He stops talking and sits in silence.
It's late—the noise of the cars whizzing by on the big thoroughfare adjacent to the apartment complex is no longer discernible. The sound of the TV in a nearby apartment is now louder than the cars.
Ki-yong breaks the silence. "Okay."
"What?"
"Give ... give me the watch," Ki-yong replies, calmly.
"Oh, that? Oh, good. Let me tell you, you made the right choice." Jong signals behind him and Chol-su appears and uncuffs Ki-yong.
Jong says apologetically, "It will be much more comfortable than the cuffs." He hands the electronic bracelet to Chol-su, who presses a couple of buttons and hands it back.
"It's ready," Chol-su announces.
"Oh, great. So we don't have to reset it?"
"No."
Ki-yong holds out his left arm and Jong presses the bracelet to his wrist. The device instantly clamps around his wrist. It feels like a cold-blooded animal, like a snake, against his skin. Ki-yong shivers despite himself.
Jong smiles, more relaxed, relieved. "Now that you've put that on, there's one last thing you have to do before you go home."
Ki-yong doesn't reply, staring down at his left wrist.