Grace and their mother were already gathered in the large, gleaming white kitchen of Rosemary and Thyme when Jane entered, breathless and harried. Everyone was smiling, in good spirits, and Jane tried to muster up the same energy. It was no use. Her thoughts were on one thing, or one person, really. Her daughter.
“There you are!” Kathleen stood and gave Jane a hug. Hot tears immediately threatened, and Jane closed her eyes, holding her mother a little tighter than usual.
Blinking quickly, she pulled back, smiling brightly and grateful she hadn’t yet removed her sunglasses. “Sorry I’m late. I had an appointment this morning and traffic was bad.”
“An appointment?” Grace frowned at her from the marble-top pastry station. “Everything okay?”
“Oh…” Jane waved a hand through the air and slid onto a stool next to her sister. She shoved her sunglasses into her handbag before setting it at her feet, hoping her eyes weren’t red from crying so much. “Just thought I’d try a new dentist over in Forest Ridge.” It was a simple excuse, and one they didn’t question. Jane breathed a little easier. Somehow keeping her thoughts to herself made this entire nightmare feel a little less real.
“Well, I hope you brought your appetite.” Anna grinned, setting a porcelain plate in front of her. “Now, honesty is important. And remember, Grace, I can create anything you want, so if you like some aspects of a few, let me know.”
Jane picked up the heavy fork and eyed the ten round cakes in front of her. Normally her mouth would be salivating by now, but her throat felt scratchy, and her hands were trembling. When she set the fork back on her plate, it clattered. “Sorry,” she said, masking her nerves with a smile.
“Mind if we start?” Grace asked. “I skipped breakfast because I knew we were doing this today.”
Jane arched a brow. “Luke isn’t joining us?”
“He’s not a big sweets person. He said as long as I’m happy, he’ll be happy.” Grace’s smile turned a little wistful, and Jane felt her own expression tighten. Imagine having a guy like that, she thought, and then she straightened her back, brushing away the sting. This was Grace’s special time. She’d had hers. It was just difficult to remember that once she’d been the happy bride-to-be. She’d actually thought she was entering into years of sunshine and roses.
She managed not to snort.
“Besides,” Grace continued, “I think he knows that anything Mark and Anna make will be a crowd pleaser.”
“I’ll second that,” their mother said, leaning forward eagerly.
Anna gestured to the first cake in the row, and even Jane felt her mouth begin to water. It was coated in glossy dark chocolate and wrapped in a stunning cream-colored ribbon of pulled sugar. Anna took a large knife and cut a wedge, revealing three beautiful layers of cake. It was so moist and dense, not a crumb fell as she plated it and passed it to Grace. “This one is the least traditional,” she said as she handed Jane and Kathleen their servings. “Here you have a Belgian chocolate cake with a milk-chocolate hazelnut cream center, coated in a dark chocolate ganache. Grace, this might be an option for the groom’s cake.”
Grace eagerly tucked into her piece, closing her eyes as she swallowed. “Don’t even bother with the rest. This is the one.”
In the distance, Jane heard Anna and her mother laugh. She tried to join in, but her mind was spinning again, her pulse racing, and for a minute she thought she might be sick. It had all started this way for her—the wedding dress shopping, the flowers, the cake—and somehow it all ended not just with an affair, but with Adam trying to take away the one thing she had left. Sophie. She’d given her daughter life, loved her with every ounce of her being, and now she risked losing her. It was unimaginable.
“Jane?”
Jane looked up to see Anna staring at her quizzically. “Everything okay?” When Jane nodded, her sister tipped her head. “You haven’t tried the cake.”
“Oh.” Jane lifted her fork and brought a small piece to her mouth. Her throat tightened. “It’s delicious,” she managed.
She went through the motions with the next six cakes, even managing to voice her opinion about the one she liked best—a vanilla sponge cake with layers of raspberry purée and marzipan—but her heart began to twist in her chest, making it difficult to breathe. Adam was going to take Sophie. Her little girl was going to live somewhere else, somewhere not with her. She wouldn’t be there to tuck her into bed at night, to pick out her clothes for school, to make her favorite foods. Instead, that woman would be doing it all.
She reached for the pitcher of water Anna had set out, nearly knocking it onto the worktop.
Her mother stared at her for several long seconds, her blue eyes narrowed. With shaking hands, Jane filled her glass and took a long, cool sip. Now wasn’t the time to fall apart. Now was the time to take action, to think. To do… something. She just wished she knew what.
Grace tossed up her hands and shrugged. “Well, I can’t decide.”
Anna chuckled, shaking her head and sending her loose blond ponytail over one shoulder. “I figured that would be the case. So long as you make up your mind by a week before the wedding, it shouldn’t be a problem.” As Grace began to say something, Anna held up a finger. “But, no changing your mind. The entire town is coming to this wedding, and I can’t redo that many tiers on short notice. And once I start decorating—”
“I understand.” Grace nodded firmly, but Jane caught the nervous twitch in her brow.
“Once I start the fondant, that’s it. That’s your cake.” Anna stared at Grace, who was now chewing on the corner of her lip, eyeing the crème brûlée cake with the decadent caramel center.
“It’s going to be this one or the red velvet. I’m nearly sure of it,” she added, giving an apologetic smile.
“Take these samples home and think about it.” Anna pulled some pastry boxes from a shelf and began transferring the cakes. “Jane, bring some home to Sophie.”
“Tonight’s Adam’s night,” Jane blurted. Quickly, she reached for the box. “Thanks. She’ll love them.”
“If you store this in the refrigerator, they should keep until tomorrow,” Anna said kindly.
Grace checked her watch and stood. “Oh my, I should get back to the store. I need to get it open before lunch hour.”
Jane’s pulse skipped. “I can cover the rest of the afternoon for you, if you’d like.” If she just went home now, she’d wander the rooms, feeling the emptiness.
Grace pulled her chestnut hair from her coat collar and fastened the buttons. “Oh, it’s a slow day, but thanks. I’ll see you tomorrow?”
Jane swallowed, managing only to nod. Maybe she’d pop into some shops, get some groceries. The thought of keeping up the pretense that everything was okay much longer was exhausting, though. She’d go home. She’d make a list and strategize. With her white pastry box in her hands, she followed Grace and their mother out of the kitchen, nearly bumping into Mark on his way inside.
“Good morning, ladies!” He grinned, but his gaze roamed quickly to Anna. At the sight of her boyfriend, Anna’s blue eyes lit up, and the grin she wore was contagious.
“You’re late,” she bantered, but a pleased flush spread over her cheeks. “But since you were sweet enough to remember my favorite flower, I’ll forgive you this once.”
It was then that Jane noticed the huge bouquet of blue hydrangeas anchoring the farm table Mark and Anna used as a desk at the back of the kitchen. Recipe boxes and cutouts from magazines littered the surface, which was nestled near the big paned windows.
Leaving them to the cozy little world they’d created for themselves, Jane felt her heart grow heavy. She’d had a cozy little world of her own once, and she supposed she still did. But for the second time in a year it was being threatened, thanks to the one man who’d once been a part of it. Her heart was beginning to pound again, and she clenched a fist at her side. It had taken every ounce of willpower after leaving her attorney’s office not to drive straight to Adam’s office and have it out with him, to scream at him, to show him how much he had hurt her, to ask when it would end, when it would be enough, and what she had ever done to deserve it. She thought it was over. She thought that pain was finally behind her. But when she caught the whisper of joy in Grace’s voice, or that smile that lit Anna’s eyes, she couldn’t help gritting her teeth against the sting of loneliness. Not for Adam—he was no good and she knew it—but for that feeling of comfort, stability, and… happiness, she supposed. She hadn’t dared to be happy in a long time. And without Sophie… A hard lump wedged in her throat. Without Sophie she didn’t stand a chance of ever finding happiness again.
Forcing her shoulders back, Jane heaved an unsteady sigh and pushed through the front doors of the empty restaurant. Outside, Kathleen waited until Grace was a block away before setting a hand on Jane’s arm.
“This can’t be easy for you, seeing your sisters in love, Grace getting married.”
Jane opened her mouth to finally release the horrible, unbearable news. Only Grace even knew that Adam was getting married and having another child. Now, standing with her mother, staring into her kind, familiar eyes, she felt as if it would burst from her. She couldn’t keep the tears back much longer.
But before she could speak, her mother said, “This is harder on me than I expected, too. It’s… sad to think that your father won’t be here to walk Grace down the aisle. Maybe I’m being silly, but I started wondering, who will I dance with at the reception?”
Kathleen’s eyes misted over, and all at once Jane was back in mom mode, as Grace playfully called it, checking her feelings, straightening her back, and pulling it together. It was what she did best, after all.
“Oh, Mom.” Jane sighed. “I’m sorry.” She knew it was no consolation to mention that she’d wondered the same. She obviously didn’t have a date for the wedding, and while maybe Mark or his brother, Brett, would take pity on her and give her a friendly swing around the dance floor, chances were she’d be sitting at the singles table, watching all the fun from a distance.
Adam was never a good dancer, she reminded herself. Even at their wedding, he didn’t hold her very close, and the few events they’d gone to that had a band, Adam preferred to sit at a table and watch. Why couldn’t he have just spun her around a few times, knowing how much she enjoyed it? You did things like that for people you loved. At least, she did.
“Please don’t tell Grace I mentioned any of this.” Kathleen’s whisper was urgent, and Jane nodded dutifully. Neither of them should be taking anything away from Grace’s happiness right now, and if that meant dealing with her problems all on her own, then that’s what she would do. It wasn’t like she didn’t have plenty of practice.
She heaved a sigh. If she didn’t tell her mother the partial truth soon, it would come from someone else. “You should know that Adam is getting remarried.” She thinned her mouth, waiting for it.
Her mother’s expression turned horror-stricken. Her wide eyes didn’t blink for several seconds.
“And, he’s having a baby.”
There. It was out. She exhaled through her nose, bracing for a reaction.
“You don’t seem very shaken up about this,” Kathleen remarked.
Jane clenched her fist inside her coat pocket. “Nope. Why should I be?” She gritted her teeth into a casual smile. “We all know I’m better off without him.”
“That’s my girl,” her mother said, patting her arm. “You’ll find someone else. You’re young, and pretty and—” Kathleen frowned and peered over Jane’s shoulder. “Is that—”
Jane followed her mother’s gaze across the street. Her eyes snapped open as her heart began to pound, the dread she’d felt now replaced with an emotion just as powerful. God help her, it was lust. She turned back to her mother, hoping the heat would fade from her cheeks before Kathleen noticed, but her mother was still focused on Henry. Jane wished she’d swiped on some lipstick or something. Her mascara had probably been cried off. Please don’t let her call out to him!
“I didn’t know Henry Birch was in town,” Kathleen mused. A slow smile curved her mouth. Catching herself, her eyes darted to Jane’s.
Jane drew a breath as Henry crossed the street. Oh, no. He really was coming over here, and here she was, downright giddy over… her ex-husband’s best friend! What was wrong with her? “I’ve seen him a few times.” What was once more?
“He was always a nice boy,” Kathleen said. “What he ever saw in Adam, I’ll never know…” A guilty flush heated her cheeks. “Sorry, Jane.”
“No apology needed,” she replied. She wondered the same thing herself most days. Henry and Adam were a mismatch, but then, couldn’t the same be said for herself and her ex-husband?
She eyed Henry as he reached the curb, quickly closing the distance between them with his long, confident stride. A grin stretched across his handsome face, crinkling those blue eyes that seemed to pull her into a trance. She shook it off, dropping her gaze to the ground, away from that casual smile and the magnetic effect he had on her. She had a million reasons for not indulging in the skip of her heartbeat every time he came near, but this morning’s conversation with her attorney trumped them all.
Adam was lining up his army, preparing for battle. And Henry, being Adam’s oldest friend, was someone she’d be best to keep her distance from for now.
Henry felt the smile slip from his face as he approached the Madisons just outside Rosemary and Thyme. Kathleen, with her kind eyes and warm smile, waved heartily as he neared, but Jane seemed to stiffen instead of returning his grin.
Determined not to dwell on the matter, Henry greeted her mother with a brief hug, stepped back, and shoved his hands into his pockets. “It’s good to see you Mrs. Madison. I’m sorry to hear about your husband.” He knew through Ivy that Ray Madison had died about eighteen months ago—it couldn’t have been easy on any of them. He glanced over at Jane. Especially Jane.
He alone knew the torment she felt over choosing to give up that dance scholarship, the fear she had that she’d somehow let her father down.
“Thank you.” Kathleen squeezed his hand once before releasing it. “Well, I have an appointment I’m already late for. Henry, are you in town for long?”
Only as long as I have to be.
He shrugged. “Can’t say. I’m helping my sister fix up our old house. We’re hoping to sell it soon.”
A knowing expression seemed to cloud Kathleen’s expression. “Well, then I’m sure we’ll see each other again before you leave. Briar Creek is small that way.”
Like he needed to be reminded, he thought grimly.
“I’d like that,” he told her, and he meant it. The Madisons had been good to his sister, like family to her, really, and for that, he was eternally grateful. The same way he’d always be grateful to the Browns.
He inhaled sharply and turned to Jane, who watched quietly as her mother disappeared down the sidewalk. He shoved his hands in his pockets and rolled back on his heels. He should go, leave Jane be—to heal, to move on and find a guy. The right guy. But for some reason he couldn’t. “Ivy said she had dinner with you last night. I was sort of disappointed to miss it.”
Her eyes widened slightly. “Oh, well… That would have been… nice.” Her gaze darted the second it met his. “I should probably get going, too. I have some stuff to sort out before—”
“I was hoping I’d run into you today, actually,” he said, blocking her path before she had a chance to get away. He scanned her face, noticing the flatness in her eyes, the paleness in her usually rosy skin, and he frowned with sudden concern. Something was wrong, and he was guessing it had nothing to do with his meet-up with Adam the other night.
Divorce was difficult. He knew it firsthand—the sense of loss, of failure. Of hopelessness, at times. For months after he and Caroline separated, he replayed their relationship, trying to pinpoint the exact moment when it all went off path and things fell apart. He told himself he liked his independence, started taking more assignments—longer assignments—to push away the aimlessness that seemed to make his mind spin. Was it doomed before they even walked down the aisle? Probably, he told himself. Caroline, like most women he’d met since her, seemed to want something from him he couldn’t give. Not to her. Not to anyone.
They wanted a family man. And what did Henry know about that? He’d tried his best, but it didn’t come naturally. Caroline had told him he hadn’t given her a full chance—them a full chance. Maybe she was right. Maybe the person he’d let down more than her was himself.
He cleared his throat. “I’ve decided to take your suggestion. I’m writing a piece on Briar Creek.”
Her eyes sparked with interest. “Really? That’s wonderful!” She tipped her head. “What made you change your mind?”
“I figured I could help Ivy, plug her flower shop,” he said. He glanced down Main Street, where orange leaves danced on store awnings, rustling in the breeze. “I thought I’d start with the festival this weekend.”
“Sophie and I will be there,” Jane offered, and then blinked rapidly. Tears welled in her eyes, and she ran a hand over her mouth, waving him back when he stepped toward her. “Sorry. I don’t know what’s come over me. I’m… fine. Really.”
“No, you’re not fine,” he said, scowling. A rush of adrenaline heated his blood, and he pulled a fist at his side, wanting to undo whatever was causing her so much distress. “What is it, Jane?”
“I can’t talk about this with you,” she whispered, confirming what he already knew.
“It’s something to do with Adam.”
She hesitated. “It’s… Sophie. He’s… he’s leaving Vermont and he wants to take Sophie with him.”
Henry dragged a hand through his hair, cursing under his breath. He should have known something more was going on. There was shiftiness in Adam’s eyes Saturday night that wasn’t typical for small talk, or a person with nothing to hide. “I was afraid of something like this.”
Jane’s eyes turned sharp. “What?”
“When I met up with Adam, he mentioned he might be moving.”
“And you didn’t tell me?” Jane stared at him, her eyes so full of hurt and confusion that he couldn’t form an explanation fast enough. All he wanted to do was take the pain out of her eyes, out of her life. She brought a shaking hand to her forehead and shook her head. “Of course you didn’t. You’re Adam’s friend.”
“I’m your friend, too,” Henry insisted, but he stopped right there when he saw the look in her face.
“No. You’re obviously not.”
Is that really what she thought? “He asked me not to say anything—”
She was backing up, shaking her head, and her entire body seemed to be shaking. “And so of course you didn’t. It’s my daughter, Henry. My daughter. She’s all I have.”
“I didn’t know what he meant, Jane—” Henry took a step toward her, but she held up her hands. “Jane, I wasn’t getting involved.”
“Do me a favor, then. Keep it that way.” She turned and ran down the street, her long brown hair swinging behind her. He watched her go, feeling the weight in his chest grow heavier with each step she took.
She had it all wrong.
His loyalty might have seemed like it was with Adam all those years ago, but his heart had always been with her.