10
Couples jogged together into the Coffee Cup to escape the drizzly rain. New Year’s Eve had turned into New Year’s slush. They’d had some snowfall the day before I got home, and the temps hadn’t moved past thirty-nine degrees since.
Yes, I missed the first snowfall. Thanks, Dad! Now the rain had turned everything to slush. How was I supposed to meet Andrea in the park in this weather? I hoped she wouldn’t call it off.
The atmosphere inside the coffee house held all the anticipation you might expect at a New Year’s party. They even had their own ball that was dropping from the ceiling at midnight. In a corner, a TV blared with the activities at Times Square in New York and Downtown Raleigh preparing the falling Big Acorn. Yes, that’s real! Well, Raleigh is the City of Oaks.
I ordered two coffees to go and then headed back into the cold to meet Andrea. A freezing wind shot past me, and I crossed my arms while holding the cups to ward off the chill. Man, I sure missed the warm California temperatures right about now. I could have met Andrea at Corona del Mar, and we would have sat up on the lifeguard station and had our private moment in the peace of the crashing waves.
But that’s not how it came together. Now was the moment. Here in the freezing temps where Andrea and I had one more moment to see if we could make this work.
I entered the park and saw her right away, standing under a red umbrella below the streetlight. My pace quickened. I couldn’t get to her fast enough. I came to a stop a few inches from her umbrella and just smiled. “Hi.” That was all I could say.
“Hi,” she said back. “Luke, come under here. You’ll get soaked.”
“Maybe we should go inside the coffee house,” I suggested, although I didn’t want to go back into the party. She wouldn’t be able to hear a word I said.
“No, it won’t get any worse.” She grabbed my arm and gently yanked me closer.
We were nearly nose to nose.
“You know that for certain, huh?” I eyed her closely.
“I have a feeling; besides, I’ve lived here all my life.”
“Yes, I believe I’ve heard that somewhere before. Here.” I offered her a cup of coffee.
“Thanks.” We both sipped on the hot brew. It gave us something to do because neither of us seemed to know what to say next. How does one broach something like this? I love you. Please forgive me!
Then the rain stopped and the clouds thinned. The moon shone high in the sky above, washing everything in whitish-yellow light.
“See, I told you.” She folded up the umbrella. Under her arm she had a blanket. She set it over the seat of a nearby bench that had been mostly sheltered from the rain under a large tree. “Thanks for coming,” she said and then looked away. “I, uh, read what you wrote.” She cleared her throat, glanced at me, and turned her gaze away again. “I gave up too easily too.” She raised her eyes to meet mine. They were watery. “I’m sorry, Luke. This was all my fault.”
“No, it was mine.” My arm slid around her shoulders. “I forced you into it.”
“No, that’s not true.” A tear slid down her nose. “I hate knowing you were feeling so bad and I made things worse again. I promised myself I wouldn’t do that to you again. And here I went, just thinking of myself, getting defensive, and not even thinking about how you were feeling. I do have a busy schedule, but that doesn’t mean I’m too busy for you. I don’t ever want you to think that I don’t need you. Never think that I wouldn’t rather spend every minute with you instead of my piano. It’s just that…”
I loved it when she rambled. And I couldn’t wait any longer. I leaned over and kissed her. No cinnamon tonight. She still tasted sweet like…watermelon. She smiled.
“I love you.”
“You do?” Her round eyes widened. “I mean, I saw you wrote that in the journal, but we’ve never said that to each other before.”
“I know, but you wrote it to me in that note inside your journal.”
She nodded. “I wasn’t sure if you were there yet, and I didn’t want to say it in person and pressure you before you were ready.”
I put my arm around her and tugged her closer. “To me, saying I love you is a big deal. I’ve never said it to anyone before…well, other than family members.”
“Me too.”
“Love isn’t just the way you make me feel. The way my heart rate accelerates whenever you walk into a room. The way my stomach swirls when you send a smile my way. That’s not love. Love is choosing to stay even when things get tough. Love is a decision. Love is a choice. And I choose to love you.”
Her face broke out into a gorgeous smile. “I love you too, Luke. I know I haven’t been the best girlfriend or given you enough time, but I want this to work.”
“Me too. You’re right. It will be hard and we’ll both have crazy schedules next year, but if we’re committed…”
“I’m committed, Luke.” She took my hand and squeezed it.
As I kissed her again, the town fireworks exploded above us over the lake. “Happy New Year,” I whispered.
“Happy New Year, Luke Ryan.”
“You know, I’ve been struggling over the whole idea of home after spending ten days back in California. And you know what I figured out?”
“No, what?” Her green eyes sparkled in the light of the explosions above us.
“Home is wherever you are.”