Chapter 15

Elana

Can it Get Any Worse?

After every high, there has to be a low. Six hours later and I’m wearing a dust mask, have a woolly scarf wrapped around my hair and am dressed in a disposable boiler suit. I’m brushing up rubble while Luke shovels it into bags and if I was worried about dust beforehand, this is something else.

‘Is it worse than you thought it would be?’ He asks, his voice slightly muffled by the face mask.

‘Yes. I just hoped it wouldn’t be quite as bad as I feared. Some of these patches are really big.’

‘You don’t know what’s going to work loose until you start hacking at it. We’ll leave the hanging dust sheets up until tomorrow to stop it travelling into the sitting room and upstairs. Overnight it will settle and in the morning it will need to be mopped with water and all the surfaces wiped down with a wet cloth. Don’t try to dry dust it, as that will just send it back up into the air. Trust me when I say that by the middle of next week you’ll have a perfect wall, as I’ll skim over the rest to even it up. It will simply be a case of letting the plaster dry out. Then it can be repainted.’

‘You’re the expert.’

He gives me a grin and immediately I feel myself colouring up. This couldn’t be misconstrued as flirting in any way, could it? He is the expert, as I know nothing about building work and this isn’t about trying to flatter his ego.

Eve pops in to check on progress and immediately offers to have Maya overnight and do the school run in the morning.

‘Don’t worry about anything,’ she assures me. ‘You have enough to cope with here. Just pack her school things and drop them over. The girls are putting everything away, ready for bed. If Maya needs you for anything I’ll give you a call to pop round. Is this really going to be tidy by Christmas?’

Eve and I survey the mess.

‘Yep, you can count on it.’ Luke isn’t fazed and I shoot Eve a warning glance not to make any unsuitable comments.

‘I’ll leave you two to get on with clearing up, then. Good luck.’ And with that she’s gone.

‘How late can I work tonight, Elana? I mean, there won’t be any noise but I’d like to get some render on so that I can top-coat with plaster as soon as it’s dry. I don’t want to put you out, though, if you’ve had enough for one evening.’

I glance at the clock. It’s nearly seven. I did say I would cook tonight.

‘I just want it done, so it’s entirely up to you. I’ll pop something in the oven for about an hour’s time. When this is cleared I have to jump back on the computer for a bit, anyway. So you won’t be disturbing me.’

‘Great. And thanks, I’m starving. Don’t feel you have to cater for me, though. I’m going to be around quite a bit and I’m used to fending for myself.’

There, Eve is wrong. He’s giving me a get-out if I want one. He’s never overstepped the mark and he doesn’t intend to, so I can relax.

I don’t know what’s up with Eve these days. It’s as if she feels she has to look out for me all the time. I might not be in a happy place, exactly, but I’m surviving. Maya seems perfectly relaxed whenever Luke is here, so I really can’t see a problem.

***

After I pop round to give Maya a goodnight kiss, Luke and I stop briefly to eat, plates on our laps, in the sitting room.

Luke insists on bringing in a clean dust sheet to throw over the sofa and we sit, side by side, eating in silence. In fact, it’s so quiet that I grab the remote and turn on the TV. The news is on and the weather forecast is predicting some heavy snow later this month.

‘Great,’ Luke says between mouthfuls of pasta and meatballs. He sounds dispirited. ‘Ironically, this year we have a lot of outside jobs on and we’re going to have some disappointed customers once the temperature starts dropping.’

‘It can’t be helped. I can’t even begin to think about the garden here at the moment. Wouldn’t it be nice to only have one project to cope with?’

He nods, mouth too full to speak for a moment.

‘Great food, by the way – appreciated. You mentioned you were away New Year’s Eve? If I can’t get everything done by Christmas, I can pop in then to finish up.’

‘Great, if you can. But please don’t feel you have to be here at every opportunity. Besides, you have Joe to consider.’

‘No – change of plan. Anita is taking him away for a few days with a friend. I said I’d swap days and I’m just waiting to find out what suits her.’

That sounds like a rather one-sided arrangement to me. He shrugs and I say nothing.

‘If you can decide on the flooring and we can get it delivered soon, I’m thinking it might be possible to start on the floor in between waiting for the walls to dry.’

‘Wow. I wasn’t expecting that! Just the thought that this could look tidy and clean for Christmas is a boost. I’ve not been feeling very festive and this year seems a lot harder, for some reason.’

Luke’s face reflects pity and I mentally berate myself. He’s not a friend, he’s here doing some work and listening to me droning on isn’t exactly what he signed up for.

‘Sorry, that just slipped out.’

‘Worried about the piano?’

We both start laughing at the same time. As we exchange glances his eyes do that twinkly thing again and I realise he’s teasing me.

‘Well, we might need to consider getting an extension built first to make room for it. I’m hoping Santa brings a desktop version this year to give us a little time.’

‘Ha, nice one! I’ve bought Joe some of those large building blocks. Thought I’d start him off young in the hope that one day he’ll join the family business. Geez – did I really just say that? I must be turning into my dad.’

I smiled and shook my head.

‘Anyway, like I said, don’t feel you have to feed me – I can always grab fish and chips on the way home if you’re busy. But that was great and I appreciate it.’

‘Hey, I have to eat, too. It’s the least I can do and it’s no bother at all.’

Eve is so wrong about Luke. He’s not a guy who is looking for a little romance, or a distraction. Like me, there’s too much going on inside his head to cope with already.

Have I turned Niall into a saint? We all have our flaws, but he was a good man. Eve was wrong in what she said; I don’t choose to be alone because no one will ever match up to him. I’m not ready yet, and I’m not about to jump into a casual relationship for the sake of easing my loneliness. That wouldn’t be fair on anyone.