Chapter Nineteen

LOUISA WALKED DOWN THE HALLWAY of Yardley Manor and peered into a room with a billiard table and walnut bar and framed portraits. A fire flickered in the fireplace and a silver tray held bottles of sherry.

She had explored the whole downstairs hoping to find someone: a guest who had fallen asleep and not gone with everyone else, a maid who was doing endless loads of laundry and didn’t hear her and Digby arrive. But the house was empty.

She wondered if she had ever been so miserable. There was the time she sprained her wrist before the tenth-grade ski trip and had to stay behind. She was the only one in the grade who missed it and spent the day in the English teacher’s classroom. The teacher let her watch A Night at the Roxbury and brought her brownies but it didn’t make up for missing hot chocolate with her friends at the ski lodge.

And there was the time after she graduated from the Culinary Institute and had an interview at the Four Seasons as an assistant pastry chef. A deer jumped in front of the train and by the time the deer was rescued and the train was running, she missed the interview and someone else got the job.

But neither of those situations made her feel sick to her stomach: she was letting down Kate and Noah. Christmas was about doing things for others and she had only been thinking about herself. From now on she would spend every weekend at the Boys & Girls Club in Harlem teaching kids how to bake cinnamon rolls. Or she could sign up to deliver homemade desserts to a nursing home in Queens.

After she told Digby she didn’t want to sleep with him, he had wandered upstairs. He wasn’t used to a woman rejecting him and she probably wouldn’t see him for hours. How could she have misjudged him? He was like a male model who was only real in the pages of a fashion magazine. Once you took away the smart blazers and expensive loafers, there was nothing there.

She had searched the mudroom for a pair of boots and jacket and was going to run down the driveway and flag a passing driver. But then it started to snow and she decided it was a bad idea. If she got struck by a car she’d create more problems for everyone.

She remembered when she met Noah and he said she had to come to London because it was her fault that Bianca’s lips blew up like a blowfish. She’d gladly listen to any of his lectures if it meant he would talk to her. He had forced her to go to London even though she wanted to stay in her suite, and he had been so furious that she went to Buckingham Palace by herself and was almost late for the reception at the Fumoir.

She had every right to have been angry with him. He didn’t trust her when she just said she was falling in love with him. But isn’t love about listening to each other? If she had taken his advice, she’d be standing in her suite at Claridge’s. Instead she might get Noah and Kate fired, and they would never speak to her again.

Gravel crunched on the driveway and she peered out the window. A black Range Rover pulled up and Louisa wondered if she was imagining things. What was Kate doing here and who was the man beside her?

She ran to the foyer and flung open the door. Kate jumped out of the passenger seat and strode toward her.

“Louisa!” Kate exclaimed, walking inside. “Digby’s publisher told us where you are. I’m glad we found you.”

“Oh, Kate!” Louisa wanted to hug her. “I’m sorry about everything, I feel awful. Digby’s car wouldn’t start and there’s no cell phone reception and the house phone seems to be broken. I kept hoping someone would give us a ride back to London, but the whole house party went to Chichester and hasn’t returned.”

“I called Susannah on the way.” A man entered behind Kate. “They’re having afternoon tea at Amberley Castle. They’ll be back this evening.”

“Louisa, this is Trevor.” Kate introduced them. “Trevor was married to Susannah. Yardley Manor is his house. Digby’s publisher said there might be tight security because some of the house guests are members of the royal family.”

“I guess the security guards drove with the house party,” Trevor offered. “It’s like when Susannah and I stayed at Balmoral Castle. You couldn’t go to the newsagent without two men in a black car following you.”

“Trevor is Susannah’s husband, what a small world!” Louisa exclaimed. “I haven’t even met her but the house is spectacular. I was so excited about preparing the desserts and it all came out wonderfully. But then we were stranded and I felt so terrible for letting everyone down.”

“It’s not your fault. You asked if you should go and I thought it was a good idea. Where is Digby?” Kate asked. “We need to hurry if we’re going to get back to Claridge’s.”

“I don’t think he’s coming.” Louisa bit her lip. “He made a pass at me and he got very angry when I refused. He started drinking and I doubt he’s in any condition to do the show. He wasn’t planning on going back at all.”

“I’ll go find him,” Trevor said. “He can’t get away with that kind of behavior.”

“It’s going to have to wait.” Kate touched his arm. “If we don’t leave now, we’ll never make it to Claridge’s.” She turned to Louisa. “Sit in the back with me and I’ll do your makeup on the way.”

“You can do my makeup while Trevor is driving?” Louisa followed her outside.

“I’m a television producer,” Kate chuckled. “I can iron a blouse on the hood of a car if I have to.”

The car peeled down the driveway and Louisa peered out the window. Snow fell softly and it resembled a snow globe. Fir trees lined the road and there was the faint outline of grand country houses behind iron gates.

“When we pulled up at Yardley Manor, I felt like Cinderella arriving at the ball,” she said with a sigh. “I was going to assist Digby Bunting and have my photo in Town & Country. How could I have been so stupid and think Digby believed in me as a chef? All Digby is interested in is a woman’s legs.”

“You believed in yourself, there’s nothing wrong with that.” Kate took out her lipstick. “I asked Noah to wait at Claridge’s in case you returned. He told me everything that happened. He said he was falling in love with you, but you got in a terrible fight.”

“He told you that?” Louisa gasped.

“He blamed himself for you running off with Digby.” Kate nodded. “You were angry at him for not trusting you. You thought he put his feelings before your career.”

“I was furious at him, but I would never miss the show on purpose,” Louisa insisted. “Anyway, I’m finished with love. I’m not going to let anything get in the way of opening my restaurant. Falling in love only causes heartache, and I almost ruined things for everyone.”

“You and Noah should talk it out,” Kate advised. “Love can be painful, but it can also be the best thing in the world. Life is empty without it.”

Louisa remembered when Noah kissed her by accident on the Giant Observation Wheel. She pictured entering Selfridges and Noah saying she could pick out whatever she wanted. They shared an omelet at the Foyer and Noah said he was in love with her.

“I suppose you’re right,” Louisa said. “But sometimes I think it would be easier to get a cat.”

The car pulled up in front of Claridge’s and Louisa stepped out. She had never been so happy to see the hotel’s striped canopy and revolving gold doors.

“Come up to my suite. I already called the stylist to finish your hair,” Kate said. “I’ll tell Noah you’re on your way.”

They took the elevator upstairs and Kate opened the door. A card was propped against a vase and Louisa recognized Noah’s handwriting.

“Noah left you a note.” She handed it to Kate and had a funny feeling, like when she stepped on an escalator that was moving in the wrong direction.

Kate tore it open and scanned the page. “You better read it,” she said, giving it to Louisa.

“Dear Kate,” Louisa read out loud. “I am offering my resignation, effective immediately. You are the producer but you can only be as effective as the people who work for you. I let my personal life interfere with my job and put the whole production in danger.

“It is better for everyone if I’m not here when Louisa returns. I booked myself a flight to New York this evening. I’m going to go stay at my parents’ place in Wisconsin for a while. I’ll be back in New York at the end of January when law school starts and I’ll stop by the office to collect my things. Sincerely, Noah.”

Louisa sank onto the love seat and her heart hammered. She smoothed the paper and folded it carefully.

“I guess I don’t have to wonder if Noah will talk to me.” Louisa’s eyes glistened. “It’s better this way; I can concentrate on my career. When we get back to New York, I’m going to ask Ellie if I can do double shifts at the bakery. Chloe and I will bake on the weekends and I’ll volunteer at the animal shelter.” She fiddled with the paper. “I can’t have a cat because my roommate is allergic, but that doesn’t mean I can’t help animals. So many stray cats get picked up in Manhattan, I could help some of them find a home.”

“Don’t be silly.” Kate snapped off one of her earrings. “Noah is just being dramatic, he’ll come around when you’re both in New York.”

“New York is a long way from Wisconsin,” Louisa responded. “Maybe he’ll rekindle a romance with a high school girlfriend and forget about me. She’ll move to New York with him and become a cocktail waitress to help put him through law school. I’ll run into them in the East Village and exchange an awkward greeting.”

Kate took off her other earring and placed it on the coffee table. She grabbed her phone and dashed off a text.

“I’m sending Dexter, the assistant camera operator, to Heathrow.” She looked up. “I gave him instructions to stop Noah from getting on the plane.”

“You can’t force Noah to stay in London!” Louisa exclaimed.

“I’m not forcing him,” Kate corrected. “Dexter will invent an emergency that only Noah can solve. If I know Noah like I think I do, he won’t let the show down completely.”

“Do you think it will work?” Louisa tried to keep the hopeful note from her voice. The important thing was that she do a good job on Christmas Dinner at Claridge’s, not that Noah was stopped from going to Wisconsin.

“Leave it to me,” Kate said confidently and picked up a hairbrush. “The stylist is late and you have to be on set in fifteen minutes. A little hairspray and lipstick and you’ll be camera ready.”

*   *   *

Louisa slipped off her wireless microphone and took a deep breath. Taping the show was over and the production assistants were milling around, removing gaffers’ tape and turning off bright lights. The director huddled with Kate in the corner and the kitchen staff loaded the dishwasher and scrubbed down the marble counter.

When Louisa first took her place beside Pierre and Andreas and Alan, Digby’s publisher, she had been terrified she would freeze. But then she pictured Ellie and Chloe huddled in front of their television and knew she couldn’t let them down. If Louisa wasn’t in New York baking cinnamon rolls for the Christmas rush, she at least had to do a good job so Bianca would promote the bakery on her show.

It had been easier than she imagined! The moment the assistant placed the ingredients for the croquembouche in front of her, she didn’t think about Noah at all. All that went through her head was that the puffs should be perfectly round and the crust must be light and fluffy.

It was only when the cameras stopped rolling that she glanced around for Noah. But Kate had been wrong: he hadn’t returned. He was probably on his way back to New York, enjoying a special Christmas Eve in-flight meal of turkey and stuffing and Christmas pudding.

The kitchen door swung open and a man appeared. He wore a brown leather jacket and there were snowflakes in his hair.

“Noah!” she gasped. “What are you doing here?”

“Apparently there was a camera malfunction and I’m the only person in London who could fix it.” He approached her. “I was standing on the sidewalk at Heathrow waiting for a taxi, and Dexter pulled up in front of me.”

Louisa looked up and wondered if she’d heard him correctly.

“You were waiting for a taxi?” she asked.

“It’s impossible to get a taxi at the airport on Christmas Eve.” He nodded. “I had just let mine go and there wasn’t another free taxi anywhere.”

“Why did you need a taxi? You were on your way to America.”

“That’s what I thought I was going to do, but when I reached the departure terminal I realized I couldn’t leave Kate in the lurch.” He dusted snow from his hair. “I ran back outside and tried to flag down a cab. Then Dexter showed up and said the whole production was in jeopardy unless I returned.”

“I see.” Louisa folded her apron. Noah was only worried about the show, he hadn’t come back to see her at all. “Kate will be very happy. She said she wouldn’t accept your resignation.”

“You read my resignation letter?” Noah asked.

“Kate gave it to me. She can’t do the show without you.” Her voice wobbled. “You were right, Digby only wanted to seduce me. He’s not even a real chef. His publisher writes his cookbooks and Digby shows up for the publicity shoots.”

“I came back because I hadn’t finished doing my job. But I also came to tell you that it’s my fault, I should have trusted you.” Noah shook his head. “You said you were going to return the earrings and I should have believed you. When you love someone you have to have faith in them.”

“Digby did try something,” Louisa said uncomfortably. “I told him I wasn’t interested and he slunk off like a dog without a tail. His car broke down and the whole house party went to Chichester and I was stuck at Yardley Manor for hours. Kate and Trevor rescued me, and Kate showed me your note.” She paused. “She sent Dexter to stop you. She said we were just having a lovers’ quarrel and we would both calm down. Love could be uncomfortable and difficult but life without it is meaningless.”

“Say that again,” he cut in.

“Say what again?” she asked. “Don’t tell me you haven’t been listening. I’m tired and my feet hurt and I need a bath. I don’t want to repeat the whole story.”

“Just the last part of the sentence,” he urged.

Louisa tried to remember what she said and frowned.

“I’ll say it for you,” he offered. “You said that love could be difficult but life without love is meaningless.”

“I did say that,” Louisa agreed. “Of course, there are other things that are important too. My career means everything to me. I’ve worked so hard to open my restaurant and I’m not going to stop now. And I’ll always want to make time for Ellie and Chloe, they’re like family. I really enjoyed writing the Christmas recipe cards for Chloe. Chloe and I might collaborate on a children’s cookbook. After all, Christmas is all about children and it could be very successful. But—”

Noah leaned forward and kissed her. She kissed him back and the lights glimmered on the pots and pans like fireworks on the Fourth of July. His mouth was warm and he pulled her close.

Noah’s hand moved down the small of her back and she felt a shiver of excitement. She pressed herself against his chest and her whole body was filled with the most incredible yearning.

He kissed her harder and then he stopped and rubbed his thumb over her mouth. He tucked her hair behind her ear and kissed her on the neck. She took a deep breath and suddenly had never wanted anyone more.

“Oh, Louisa,” he whispered. “I want you so much.”

“I want you too,” she breathed, reaching up and kissing him again. He smelled of pine leaves and cologne and she felt light and happy.

“You kissed me while I was still talking,” she said when they finally parted.

“I don’t need to hear anything else.” He grinned. “You told me the only thing that mattered.”

The kitchen door opened and Louisa jumped. She had almost forgotten where they were and she was suddenly embarrassed.

“We should go,” she whispered. “They have to finish clearing the set.”

“Louisa, wait.” He stopped her. “We hadn’t finished.”

Louisa turned and wondered what she had forgotten. Noah wrapped his arms around her and kissed her.

“Now we can go,” he said and smiled. “I’m sorry I didn’t trust you, I’ll never doubt you again. You are bright and beautiful and you know more about baking than anyone I have ever met.” He paused and kissed her again. “I realize how lucky I am. I couldn’t have found a better replacement.”