From that day on, Lulu and Fleischman were more than boss and assistant and more than teammates. They were, in fact, partners, with Lulu offering Fleischman (and making him take) exactly half of the money she earned walking dogs, and promising to teach him (for only ten dollars) how not to be scared of caterpillars and worms, plus whispering (in a voice he hardly could hear, but at least she said it) that although she had no wish to be the nicest girl in the world—boring! too boring!—she would try her very best to be nicer to him.

(Somewhere deep in his forest, Mr. B is slowly nodding his head and smiling.)

Fleischman, in return, promised that he’d give away the shirt that says I’M HERE TO BRING SOME HAPPINESS INTO YOUR LIFE, teach her (for only ten dollars) to understand dogs, try his very best to stop saying how honored and thrilled and delighted and smart he was, and work on smiling a less annoying smile.

Did Lulu stop hating Fleischman? Yes, she did. Did Lulu stop being rude to him? Yes, she did. Was Lulu now willing to talk with him while they walked the dogs together on weekday mornings? Yes, she was. And so, did Fleischman and Lulu finally turn into New Best Friends? No, they did not.

You want a happy ending? Read Cinderella. This story has only sort of a happy ending. Because Fleischman is still too annoying for Lulu to love. And Lulu is still too fierce for Fleischman to love. They respect each other. They count on each other. They’re partners and dog-walking buddies. If one of them got tied up, the other would help. But unless they turn into totally different people, I’m pretty sure they won’t be New Best Friends.

Still, the last time I saw them together they were walking Brutus and Pookie and Cordelia. Lulu was trying to kick some dirt on Fleischman’s perfect sneakers. Fleischman was shaking a carrot in Lulu’s face. And as they got near the end of the street I could hear them loudly singing this money song: