Chapter Eleven

 

“Where the hell is she?”

Emma just exited the bathroom at the end of the long hallway that bisected Adam’s apartment when she heard the front door slam followed by Ben’s gruff inquiry as to her whereabouts. And he seemed distressed, which was a first. His usual languidly calm and centered voice sounded anxious, almost harassed.

Why was he so upset? She didn’t actually mean anything to him.

“Well, hello to you too, brother,” Adam dryly replied. From her vantage point, Emma couldn’t see them standing in the kitchen, but she could imagine Adam’s sarcastic facial expression as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“Quit fucking around. Where is she?” Ben growled. The familiar sound had her shivering impulsively. She could save them both the trouble by rounding the corner and announcing her presence, but it kind of sounded like Adam might be gearing up for a lecture. This might be the only opportunity she got to hear what was actually going on, so stayed put just outside the bathroom door and listened.

The soft jingle of a dog collar and the little grunts of a small pug caught her attention. The Captain, as Adam called him, nudged at her leg until she bent down to pick him up. He gave a contented snort as he rested his head against her arm and she felt a smile split her lips.

That was, until she heard Adam speak. “Relax. She’s using the bathroom. She’s fine.”

Or, you know, instead of a lecture he could just tell Ben where she was and be done with it. She braced herself for Ben’s appearance in the hallway but Adam spoke again, stopping him.

“Are you serious about her?” The question had a small gasp escaping her lips and from the silence in the other room, it seemed it had caught Ben off guard as well. Though she was pretty sure she already knew the answer, she held her breath in anticipation of his response anyway.

But he replied with neither a positive nor a negative, just a, “Why do you care?”

Adam sighed. “Because if you are, you aren’t going to be able to brush off what happened to her tonight. You won’t be able to distract her from the questions that you and I both know are coming. And if you are serious about her, she deserves to know the truth.”

Well, that didn’t sound ominous or anything. Just what was this truth she deserved to know? What if he did turn out to be some sort of murderer? She didn’t know if she would be able to handle something like that. Then again, every instinct she possessed told her that, in his grief, Paul had been exaggerating the actual events that took place. Gruff and intimidating though he may be, Ben would never intentionally hurt someone. She believed that to her marrow.

“I’ll tell her the truth,” he said softly. “I’ll tell her whatever she wants to know.”

His words had her heart pounding in her chest. Did that mean he was serious about her after all?

As she tried to wrap her brain around that little nugget of knowledge, he turned the corner and appeared at the entrance of the hallway. He looked all disheveled with his short dark hair in disarray as though he had driven his fingers through it more than once. Not that the messy look didn’t work for him. Hell, anything he did worked for him, and that was part of her problem.

Their eyes connected and she could see the resignation in his dark stare. Immediately, she knew he was aware that she had heard them. Rather than anger at her eavesdropping, his expression seemed to contain relief.

“You okay, Sugar?” His low rumble vibrated down the hall and into her body, the sound somehow comforting. Or maybe it was the vulnerability she saw on his face when he asked the question.

“Yeah, I’m good.” Her voice cracked so she cleared her throat and stood a little straighter, careful not the jostle The Captain.

“You sure about that?” There went that hand running through his hair again, and was it her imagination or was it shaking a little?

“I promise you, I’m okay.” She chewed on her bottom lip, debating whether or not she should continue. There was no getting around the inevitable, so she said, “But I think we need to talk.”

He nodded. “You’re right. We do.”

It surprised her when he started making his way toward her. She didn’t think that they would have this conversation here. The Captain whined but went easily when Ben took him from her and set him on the floor. As they walked down the hall to what she guessed was a spare bedroom, he kept her hand firmly in his, almost as if he were afraid she would bolt given the first opportunity.

Yeah right. Nothing could make her take off right now, she wanted to hear what he had to say.

He opened the door to the spare room and calmly shut it behind them while she took a seat on the bed. He didn’t move from the door, he leaned up against it, eyeing her warily and she again got the impression that this was a tactic to keep her here.

“Where do you wanna start?”

Sitting on the edge of the bed, she crossed her legs and hugged her middle. “How about you start at the beginning. Who was Tim?”

For a second he screwed his eyes tight and she knew that he didn’t want to talk about this. Normally, just that look on his face would have her dropping it, but they needed to get this out. Knowing him, he probably hadn’t spoken to anyone since it happened and keeping something like this bottle up wasn’t healthy.

Opening his eyes, he slid his back down the door until his ass hit the floor. He propped his elbows up on his knees.

“Time was my best friend, back in my hoodlum days.” The twinkle in his eyes when he looked at her had a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips. But that twinkle was short lived, as was her smile, when he continued. “Tim was also Paul’s little brother.” He sighed and ran that hand through his hair again. “Look, I’ll save you all the gritty details but I think you can guess by now that Tim and I used to get into a lot of trouble together.”

“Yeah, I gathered that.”

“It was a Saturday night and the two of us decided that we wanted to get wasted.” He shrugged. “Nothing really new there. That was a pretty normal Saturday or hell, weekend, for us. This particular night, we invited some girls over.” His gaze shot to her face then. To gauge her reaction? “Again, not new.”

Ah, yes. Definitely to gauge her reaction and despite the fact that this had happened however-long-ago before they had met, she felt an irritating pang of jealousy. So he hadn’t slept with as many women as she might think – his words – but he had still slept around. Shouldn’t be so surprising given how well the man knew his way around the bedroom. Wanting him to continue, she didn’t give her irrational feelings a visible reaction. Instead, she went with a nod and an “okay”.

“By the point this story does get new, we were so fucked up I don’t think any of us could see straight. I took one of the girls up to my room and left Tim downstairs with the other one. They were playing a video game or something. I honestly don’t remember. Fuck, I don’t even remember the girl’s names. We’d just met them when we were out the night before and I was so gone that they didn’t register.” His gaze shifted away from her then to focus on the wall behind her. She didn’t mind. He needed to do what he needed to do to get it out.

“Apparently, while I was messing around upstairs, they ran out of alcohol. And Tim –“ His voice broke and he cleared his throat. “Stupid fucking bastard,” he murmured shaking his head and wiping at the side of his face. He took a deep breath and got the rest out all in a rush. “Tim decided it would be a good idea to run down to the store and get some more liquor. The girl he was with didn’t see a problem with that plan and went with him. When I came back downstairs the fucker had taken my keys and my car was gone.”

Emma gasped then held her breath, already knowing where this story was headed as dread and remorse formed a lump in her throat.

“He wrapped the car around a telephone pole, totaled it. Killed himself and the girl.”

“Oh, Ben. That’s horrible, I’m so sorry.” The tortured look in his eyes made her want to get down on the floor with him and wrap her arms around him. The way he tensed up at her words, however, kept her right where she was.

“So that’s what happened to Tim.” He ran his hands down his face then rested his head back against the door to look at her through the slits of his eyes.

Uncertainty once again had her chewing on her bottom lip. “That’s tragic, Ben. It really is and I’m so sorry for your loss.”

He gave a bitter laugh. “You know, I think that’s the first time anyone’s said that to me. Outside of my brothers anyway.”

Confusion pulled her mouth into a frown. “That doesn’t even make sense. He was your best friend.”

“Yeah, well.” He looked down at his hands. “Not a lot of sympathy when people blame you for your best friend’s death.”

Now that pissed her off. “I fail to see how any of that was your fault.”

Maybe it was partly her words, but most definitely it was the sharp confident tone with which she delivered them that had his eyes snapping to hers.

“I did tell you what people thought of me before that happened, right?”

“Yeah, so? It doesn’t change the fact that it wasn’t your fault.”

She understood that he felt guilty, she really did. More than likely she would feel the same way. It’s a natural human emotion. But facts were facts and this wasn’t his fault.

“Ben, you didn’t put the keys in his hand. Hell, you weren’t even in the room when he made the decision to leave. You said yourself that this was a typical night for you. You had no way of knowing what he would do.”

“I was still the one that got him so fucked up in the first place, Emma. It was still my car that he took. So, nice as that sentiment is, none of that matters. Not to me, or the people in this town. And especially not to Paul.”

Emma’s eyes narrowed at that asshole’s name. “Okay. Let’s talk about Paul for a minute. He’s such a concerned big brother now, but where the hell was he when all this went down? If you were such a bad influence on Tim, why didn’t Paul intervene? Did he even try?”

A deep frown line formed down the center of Ben’s forehead. “Not really, actually. Paul kind of ignored Tim. Especially when he started getting into trouble on a regular basis. I think he was embarrassed by him.”

The impulse to roll her eyes was so strong she couldn’t suppress it. “I’m sure he was such a model citizen even back then. I’ve met him twice and both times he was thoroughly shit-faced. And let’s not forget the last time I saw him he attacked me in a dark parking lot. Oh, what a stand up guy.”

Ben’s eyes darkened and his next words came out on a low growl. “That cocksucker better hope I don’t run into him anytime soon. It’s different when he comes at me like that. But you?” He shook his head, the muscle in his jaw getting a workout. The menace in his eyes then would have been frightening if his words hadn’t triggered something very important.

“Wait. When he comes at you? He’s gone after you before? I mean, aside from only verbally?”

He shot her a level look. “Baby, he blames me for the death of his little brother. Of course he’s come after me before.”

The fact that retaliation for hurting a loved one seemed a given to him was proof positive that Ben wasn’t as worthless as he thought he was. In fact, his worth as a human, in her estimation, was pretty damn immeasurable. But the fact that he felt he deserved that retaliation for something he didn’t do was intolerable.

Then, she didn’t know why, but yet another dot connected in her brain. “That scar on your side. That’s not from falling out of a tree, is it?”

A pregnant pause ensued as he shifted his ass uncomfortably against the door. “No, it’s not.” Three simple words. No elaboration or explanation.

“What was it, then? Paul?” She didn’t care if he pressed her to drop it this time. She needed to know the answer.

“Yeah, it was Paul,” he said on a weary sigh. “It was a few months after the accident. Fucker got me with a knife before I knew he was there.”

“Jesus,” she breathed. She had a moment of shock and mournfulness for all he had been through, before those feelings slid right on down into fury and outrage on his behalf. “That. Is such. Bullshit.”

The corners of his lips twitched and something akin to tender amusement lit his eyes. “Don’t worry, Sugar. I survived.”

She rolled her eyes again.

“Well, let’s all give Paul a fucking medal for being citizen of the year. It’s ridiculous the way these people treat you, Ben. You don’t deserve it. Especially shit like that.” She threw a pointed look to his covered abdomen.

Licking his lips, he shook his head. “But I do, Emma.”

Pushing the fingers of both hands into his hair, he tilted his head down to cradle his forehead in his palms.

Okay. That despondent tone in his voice was it. Abandoning her perch on the edge of the bed, she got down onto her knees in front of him and pulled his hands away from his face. Taking his face in her hands, she forced his gaze to lock with hers. “You. Did not. Kill. Tim.”

He tried to pull his head away from her but she wouldn’t let him. “What happened to him was not your fault. And all those people who think it was, especially Paul, can go to hell. He’s probably ashamed of himself for being such a shitty brother and blames you for it because it’s easier. And you’re already blaming yourself enough. You had your reasons for wanting to escape reality by doing the things you did? Well, so did Tim and, believe me, they weren’t because of you. Your friendship was probably the only relief, joy and acceptance he’d ever felt. You weren’t the one who hurt him.”

Suddenly, without warning, his arms shot around her, knocking her off balance and into his body. His mouth came down on hers in a hard, eager kiss. One big hand moved to cradle the back of her head, titling it for better access.

He swallowed her moan as she wrapped her arms around his neck, burying her fingers in his hair. There was so much more to this man than met the eye and it broke her heart that he couldn’t see it. Right now, in this moment, she was determined to change that.

Breaking the kiss, he rested his forehead against hers.

“I’ve never met a woman like you, Emma,” he whispered reverently. “No one sees me the way you do. Past all the bullshit and all the armor. Damn, baby. How’d I do this before I met you?”

Heart pounding in her throat, she leaned up and kissed his lips softly.

“I have no clue,” she said with a smile. Of course, she was only half serious but the part of her that was, really did wonder how he’d managed to turn his life completely around with virtually no support system. He had his brothers, but from what she could gather, he didn’t let them in much. Not even Adam.

Speaking of…he was just down the hall.

“Maybe we should get out of here,” she said resting her hands on his chest and pushing away a fraction.

“Why?” He frowned, tugging her back into him.

“Umm,” she cleared her throat. “I think your brother had plans tonight. I’m sure he doesn’t want to hang around babysitting us.”

For that, she got a full-on smile. Good grief, the man was beautiful when he smiled. She would never get over it. “He did have plans but don’t worry. His babysitting duties ended when I got here.”

She cocked an eyebrow. “He left?”

Moving his hand up to cup her jaw, he gave her a soft kiss before he said, “He left. Besides, we could stay here all night and he wouldn’t care.” He kissed her again, giving her another smile, this one a little wicked around the edges. “Actually, he probably won’t be back tonight anyway.”

She could only shake her head. Adam really was a man-whore.

“Okay.” She pushed away from him again. “Let’s at least get up off the floor.”

He let her move through his arms until she stood in front of him. She held out her hand to him and he took it, pulling himself up then once again pulling her off balance as he tugged her toward the bed.

“Lie down with me for a little while, Sugar.” The grin he shot her was at once adorable and mischievously sexy. How did he even do that? “I wanna cuddle with you.”

Wow, really? He didn’t have to tell her twice. Willingly, she went when he pulled her down onto the mattress. They lay on their sides facing each other. He hooked her leg on top of his and put his body as close to hers as humanly possible. Obviously, he welcomed no space between them and a thrill of satisfaction went through her at the knowledge.

With a hand on her jaw, he titled her head as his lips found hers. This kiss was slow and thorough. He took his time exploring her mouth, tongue sliding against hers, causing her to hum in approval against his lips.

Time seemed to slow as they lay there, kissing and touching, their strokes lazy and unhurried. This felt more like a languid meandering that fulfilled his need to hold her more than it did a seduction. Emma had never been more contended in her life. The man liked to kiss her and in no way was she complaining. But, as much as she was enjoying this, there were still a few things they needed to sort out before she could get too comfortable.

“Ben,” she said, softly breaking their gentle kiss. “You should know that this means more to me than just casual sex.” She almost hated to break the mood but she needed to get this out there. For her own sanity and wellbeing, she needed to finish the conversation they had started that morning. Her conscience wouldn’t let her go on with him thinking that this was something it wasn’t, or that it was as simple as it had started. It had all become dangerously complicated for her and he deserved to know that. “This is the last thing you probably want to hear right now, but I needed to tell you where I stood.”

Closing his eyes, he buried his face in her neck. The feeling of his soft lips trailing kisses against her skin surprised her considering her declaration. Was he going to ignore her words and pretend she had never said them?

Maybe she shouldn’t have said them because his silence in their wake was ruining the mood for her. How could you cuddle with someone you knew didn’t care about you? No, she should have kept her mouth shut.

Honestly, she didn’t know what she had expected him to say. He had been clear with her that morning about this very thing and she definitely shouldn’t be lying here in his arms making things that much harder for herself. Compartmentalizing what they were doing was an impossible task for her. She was about to say something to take the pressure off him when he pulled back to look at her.

“Then you should know that I want more from you than just your sex, Emma.”

Wait. Did she hear that right? “Then why did you tell me this morning that you didn’t want to complicate things?”

Rolling onto his back with a sigh, he stared up at the ceiling as though looking for the right words. In the end, he settled with,” I was being an asshole this morning.”

Despite the situation, she had to laugh. “Good, it wasn’t just in my head then.”

He narrowed his eyes on her but she could see the corner of his mouth twitch. “You caught me off guard with your ‘what are we doing’ question and I went into self-preservation mode.” The look in his eyes turned uncertain as he regarded her cautiously.

“Self-preservation mode? Like you had to protect yourself from me?” If anything, she would have thought it would be the other way around. It was her heart that had the most likelihood of being trampled in this equation. But maybe she had read him wrong?

“Yeah, I did. Please remember the basis of our hookup. You had a problem writing sex scenes and basically only wanted experiences that you could pour into your book. It didn’t start off all hearts and flowers for us. Besides that, you were only gonna be here for a few weeks. I didn’t think you wanted anything more from me.”

It was her turn to roll onto her back and stare up at the ceiling. Shit, when he spelled it out like that she didn’t blame him for thinking he needed to keep any emotions he might be having to himself. He probably thought her question this morning was about her worrying he had developed feelings for her. Instead of what it actually was: her developing feelings for him. “I feel like such a user.”

“No,” he said turning onto his side to face her and gently pulling on her hip to make her do the same. “You didn’t use me. Believe me, Sugar, I was more than willing. I –” He shook his head and licked his lips. It was like his tongue was a magnet that drew her eyes to track its movement. He had the sexiest mouth she had ever seen and even now, when she was so interested in what he had to say, he was capable of distracting her without really trying. It disconcerted her. “Things are different with you, Emma. I’m different with you. Have been since I first saw you.”

That had her eyes snapping back to his. “Different how?”

And from the beginning? Up until a few days ago, he had been standoffish and she had assumed that was his status quo. Or maybe it was all part of his plan to protect himself from her. Just the thought of him feeling like that seemed absurd. But she understood. If she were in his position she probably would have done the same.

“I can’t explain it.” He reached out to tuck a stray piece of hair behind her ear. “There’s something about you that makes me feel…possessive. From the day we met in the bookstore, I wanted to mark you as mine in some way. Even though I didn’t think I could actually make you mine, the impulse was still there.”

“And you did, too, didn’t you?” He had never used a condom with her. Not once. She had definitely wondered about that but wouldn’t let herself dwell on it too long even though she knew she should have.

From the way his eyes darkened and he shifted beside her, she could tell he knew what she was referring to. “Yeah, I did.”

The simple statement coupled with the hard length of him she could feel digging into her belly, sent her mind reeling. Obviously, it turned him on thinking about coming inside her and his sense of proprietorship over her body made her flush hot all over.

“I’ve never done that with anyone before. Only you,” he whispered.

“I haven’t either, actually. Just you.” If possible, his amber eyes got darker, turning almost black.

“Good, keep it that way,” he rumbled, his deep voice lowering about an octave. Oh my. He really was possessive of her, wasn’t he? She smiled to herself.

“What’s with the cute little smile on your face, Sugar?” he asked with a little smile of his own as he circled her nose with his.

It made her smile wider. “I know you’re all uncomfortable with this, but I like that you’re possessive of me.”

He blew out a breath on a shaky laugh. “I’m glad you like it. It scares the shit out of me, though.”

Emma pulled back to look at him. “Why does it scare you?”

She wouldn’t hurt him. Surely he knew that by now.

“When I’m with you, all I wanna do is lock the rest of the world out. Wrap myself up in you and live in our own little cocoon of make believe. It scares me because I know we can’t stay there. Sooner or later, my fucked up reality is gonna touch you, like it did tonight. Thank God Adam was there.” His grip on her body tightened and he pulled her closer as though trying to shield her from what happened. “I didn’t want to think about all the shit with Paul anymore. I didn’t want it to touch us and what we have. But I know that’s not possible.”

“But it is possible.” She caught his gaze and held it, hoping her sincerity would register. “What we have doesn’t have to be make believe, Ben. We can make it real. More real than your past and what these people think of you ever was.”

“Fuck, I hope you’re right.” He pulled her into him so that her cheek rested on his chest. “Because I don’t think I can let you go.”

It amazed her as the realization hit that somehow she had been the one to get under his skin. The thing that set her apart from everyone else he knew was her complete acceptance of him. That was the quality she possessed that tied him to her and she wouldn’t give that up for the world.

Holding onto him tighter, she snuggled into him and whispered, “I don’t want you to let go.”

 

 

 

The familiar feeling of Ben’s body wrapped around her was the first thing Emma registered when she opened her eyes. The room was dark and quiet and a quick glance at the digital clock on the nightstand told her that it was going on four a.m. Snuggling back into Ben’s warmth, she wondered what had woken her.

Then she felt it again.

Ben shifted restlessly behind her. Grunting in his sleep, he pulled her closer, her back to his front as one of his knees slid between her thighs. She wanted to turn in his arms to make sure he was okay, but his tight hold on her prevented her from doing so.

As she was about to pry his arms off her to wiggle free, she felt his soft, velvet lips begin to run kisses along the back of her neck. Slowly, a warm, callused hand slipped beneath her shirt to cup her breast. Instantly, she knew he was awake and when he rolled his hips into her ass, she realized he was awake in more ways than one.

“Mmm,” he rumbled into her ear, breathing her in. “You smell good.” He tugged on the cup of her bra, pulling it down to let her breast spill free into his palm. “You feel even better, Sugar.”

Rocking back into his gently thrusting hips, she whispered, “So do you.”

And, oh fuck, he did. She could get used to waking up like this.

He rolled and tugged on her nipple before skimming his hand down her side and into the front of her jeans. His meandering lips caressed her jaw and she turned to capture them with her mouth as he popped her jeans open. Deft fingers slid inside and down the front of her panties, the first touch to her swollen clit making her jerk into him. He growled into her mouth.

“I fucking love how wet you get for me, Emma.” He demonstrated his point by sliding his fingers through her slippery slit. If he didn’t take so much obvious pleasure in it, she might be embarrassed by just how wet he made her. Her panties had gotten completely soaked and she could feel the moisture coating her thighs as he slid two thick fingers easily inside her. She pulled her mouth from him and groaned at the fullness of his invasion.

He pumped her a few times then slowly pulled his fingers free and brought the wet tips up to her aching nub, rubbing it in torturous circles. She couldn’t stop her hips from rotating and grinding down on his hand any more than she could stop her erratic breath from hitching in her throat. He felt too damn good. The movement of her hips sped up as her muscles tightened with her impending orgasm. The feel of his wet tongue sliding up the side of her neck had her turning her face into her arm on a moan, granting him better access.

“You gonna come?” The husky tone of his voice hit her ear as he nipped at her lobe, making her shiver.

“Yes,” she hissed when he increased the pressure of his fingers. But as soon as the word left her mouth, his movements ceased. “No, don’t stop,” she pleaded. She had been so close and when he stopped, her climb up that hill stopped with him, leaving her suspended in the air.

Lightning quick, he gently slapped her pussy, making her yelp, but the sting had a surprisingly pleasant aftershock.

“Don’t come until I say you can,” he growled before pulling away and rolling onto his back.

She took her cue and followed, turning to face him. When he gripped her thigh and pulled her over his hips to straddle him, she didn’t fight. Instead, she sat up and pulled her shirt over her head. That wicked tongue of his came out to glide along his bottom lip and his eyes narrowed to lust filled slits as he took her in.

Rocking her mound down onto his erection, she slid her hands beneath his t-shirt and glided them upward. The muscles of his abdomen bunched and contracted as he moved and she savored the feel of his hot skin under her palms. His hips jerked up into her, nearly taking her knees from the bed when she raked her nails along his chest and over his nipples.

Suddenly, he sat up, yanking his shirt over his head before taking control of her mouth. His talented fingers snapped the clasp of her bra loose and she slipped it down her arms and off when the wet heat of his mouth broke from hers and enveloped a nipple.

“Ben,” she moaned, writhing on top of him and digging her fingers in his hair to pull him closer.

The index finger of his right hand trailed down her spine, leaving goose bumps in its wake before he shoved his hand down the back of her loosened jeans and into her panties. She cried out and rocked her hips harder into his when his fingers lightly rubbed over the rosebud of her back entrance.

“Someday soon, Emma, I’m gonna take you here.” He nipped her throat before using his free hand to pull her chin down, forcing her to look him in the eye. The raw ownership she saw in his gaze had her breath catching. “I want you to feel me everywhere, Sugar.” He rubbed, giving her a little more pressure and she gasped and clung to him. “Soon,” he promised darkly before slipping his fingers lower through her wetness to find her dripping opening from behind.

Without warning, he thrust two fingers inside her and she bucked into him. If she rocked her hips forward just right, her clit rubbed up against the hardness of his cock contained by his jeans. Each time she hit it a shiver went right through her. Soon he was fucking his fingers into her in time to the rolling movements of her hips and she could feel herself climbing back up that hill.

His teeth nipped her chin, making her tilt her head down so his lips could graze hers.

“You about to come?” He murmured against her lips and just hearing the world ‘come’ in his deep voice had her flesh pulsing and her hips jerking into him. “What did I tell you, baby?”

The way he dragged his teeth slowly across her bottom lip and the feel of his fingers pumping in and out of her pussy made coherent thought a little challenging. His mouth found her breast and his teeth tugged at her nipple, wringing a cry from her throat. “What was the rule, Emma?”

“Don’t –” It was hard to get enough air into her lungs to form those two tiny words he wanted to hear. This time his teeth bit down on her other nipple and the words rushed out. “Don’t come.”

It was reminder to her as much as it was an answer to his question.

“Mmm, that’s right.” The vibrations of his voice against her sensitive skin and the twisting thrusts his fingers had now started made it nearly impossible to obey him. “When can you come, baby?”

“Ben, please,” she panted, fisting her fingers in his hair as she ground her hips into him. She didn’t know how much longer she would be able to hold on.

The fingers of his free hand came up to tangle in her hair, forcefully pulling her head back and stretching her neck in a tight arch.

“When?” He growled against her throat.

Oh how she loved his dominant side, the way he owned her body and he damn well knew it. Used it to his advantage.

“Not until you tell me to.” Her voice came out broken and hoarse. Fuck, he’d better hurry up and tell her to or she might come anyway. She shivered at the thought of what he might do to her then.

As if sensing her thoughts, he chuckled low in his throat and said, “Good girl,” then promptly pulled out of her.

The hand that drifted up her back that she supposed was meant to be soothing, failed dangerously short of its purpose. The growl of frustration that emanated from her then was a sound she had never heard herself make before. Wanting to wipe that smug little smile off his face, she pushed all of her weight forward, knocking him off balance. Before his back could hit the mattress, though, he had her flipped around so that she ended up beneath his big body. That smug smile turned into a grin.

“Be patent, Sugar.” He kissed her lips softly. “I’ll get you there.”

Oh, no doubt in her mind that he would, but he took his sweet time about it. She went to bite him and he pulled back with a laugh. Of all the times for him to show his playful side, it had to be now? When she wanted him so bad she thought she would explode?

But then he stood up to push his jeans down his legs and off. All of her irritation evaporated when his thick cock sprang free, a bead of pre-cum leaking from the angry red tip. He wanted her just as bad and that somehow made this easier.

Grabbing her ankles, he dragged her down the bed until his fingers had access to the top of her jeans. He tugged and she obligingly lifted her hips so he could pull them, along with her panties, off.

“Do you want me, Emma?” His warm, rough hands slid up her legs, spreading them wider when he got to her inner thighs. “You wanna feel me inside you?”

When he crawled up the bed to hover over her, she curled her fingers around his upper arms that braced his weight against the mattress, trying to pull him forward onto her. She needed to feel his skin sliding against hers, needed him to cover her and surround her with his heat.

She just needed him.

The muscles of his arms tensed under her touch and he resisted her tugging. Instead, he caught her hands in his and pinned them above her head. So, in the end, she got what she wanted anyway.

“Tell me,” he rumbled against her lips. The hot, wet tip of his erection slid through her folds and bumped against her clit as he settled over her. She whimpered, her hips arching upward to seek more contact of their own volition. “Do you ache for me the way I ache for you ever damn time I see you?”

His amber gaze bored into hers, imploring her to answer with a kind of tense vulnerability and she knew she would never get that look out of her head as long as she lived. He was talking about more than sex here and she felt her heart swell as it picked up speed.

Swallowing past the sudden lump in her throat, she said, “Ben, I ache for you even when I don’t see you. I’ve never wanted anyone or anything even remotely as much as I want you.”

At her words, his intense look transformed into one of immense satisfaction and he slid his palms against hers to twine their fingers. “Then you got me, Sugar.” His pet name for her came out on a moan which she echoed as he began to push into her. “All of me,” he said as he slid inside her to the hilt.

He took her mouth in a fierce kiss as his hips took up a steady, languid rhythm, working his cock in and out of her pussy. Emma opened wider for him, his deep measured strokes taking her higher. Then he started to slowly circle his hips. Thrust, circle, thrust, circle until her nails dug into the backs of his hands and she wrenched her mouth away from his to let out a near scream.

“Ben,” she moaned. “Don’t stop. Don’t stop.” If he stopped right now she would die. And she would take him with her. She was right there, right on the edge and she knew this orgasm was going to be monumental, bordering on painful. She didn’t care, she wanted it anyway.

“I can feel you squeezing me, baby.” He grunted. “You wanna come?”

“Ah, yeah, yeah.” It was all she could manage as their bodies moved together and she could feel herself reaching that point of no return.

He growled against her ear and the sound vibrated along her nerve endings, making her inner walls spasm in delight. “Fuck, Emma. Come, come for me.”

That was all she needed to hear and she went off like a rocket beneath him, calling his name, heedless of the noise she made. The feel of him shuddering and jerking inside her at the same moment, his hot cum spurting into her, had another orgasm hitting her before the first one ended. He was still marking her and she wanted it, loved it.

When he collapsed on her, gently rocking his hips into her to bring them both back down, she welcomed his weight, body trembling with little aftershocks. But unbidden and out of nowhere a disturbing thought entered her brain that had her stilling in his arms.

“What’s wrong?” he asked nibbling at her jaw and she forced her body to relax into his.

“Nothing at all,” she lied.

He pulled back to look down at her. “You sure?”

“Positive.” She smiled reassuringly, hoping it was convincing. After studying her for a long moment, he seemed to be satisfied with what he saw and rolled over onto his side, pulling her into his body.

“Go to sleep then, Sugar.” He nipped her throat. “You keep waking me up like that and we’ll both be exhausted and never get out of bed.”

Snuggling into him, she laughed and acquiesced but she knew that sleep was a long way off. All she could think about as she lay in his arms was the revelation she’d had moments before.

That she was utterly and completely in love with this man.