Ainsley was sore, and not just from getting hit on the head earlier that day. No, Loch had done his best to make sure she was loved in every possible way before Misty’s grandparents dropped her off, worry and love in their gazes.
Misty had taken one look at Ainsley and had run to her, full-tilt with her arms outstretched. Ainsley had hugged her tightly, her love for the little girl unending. She hadn’t missed the glances between Misty’s grandparents, but they hadn’t been looks of anger. Instead, Ainsley thought it could have been more shared grief, the fact that their daughter wasn’t there to be a part of this. It was Marnie’s loss, but Ainsley wasn’t going anywhere, and neither were Misty’s grandparents. They’d find a way to make it work because even with that glance, they hadn’t acted as if they didn’t want Ainsley around. They never had. They’d been gracious and loving, even if they weren’t as emotive as Loch’s parents.
Misty was one very lucky girl, even without Marnie in her life. And though Ainsley would never speak it aloud, she thought that Misty was probably even luckier that Marnie wasn’t around.
That might make Ainsley a bad person, but the fact that Misty had never known her mother meant the little girl couldn’t miss her as much as she might if Marnie had left later in Misty’s life. Ainsley knew things were going to get harder as Misty grew up, but Loch’s family, Misty’s maternal grandparents, and Ainsley herself would find a way to heal those wounds. No matter what.
Now, however, was the time for them to pretend that everything was fine for Misty’s sake as they sat in Loch’s parents’ home and had a Collins family dinner. Ainsley had been invited for years and came often, but this was the first time she was coming with Loch rather than just as his best friend.
To say that she was nervous was an understatement.
Add in the fact that she knew the adults would want to talk about what had happened throughout the week, and she knew it would be a long dinner, if a delicious one.
Since the night had been planned before she and Loch had slept together, before the murder, the attack, well…before everything that seemed to change on a dime, Ainsley had to get to the house early since she and Fox were cooking. That meant that Loch and Misty got there early too since they were riding together.
Like a family.
Nope, not thinking about that. Too much, far too soon. They might be living together for the moment, might be acting like they were further into their relationship than they were, but it was because of the circumstances. The fact that they already had the base of their relationship helped, but everything else going on around them was what had made it all feel so much more urgent, so much more…developed.
So, no, Ainsley wouldn’t be thinking about that.
Instead, she and Fox would be using what they’d learned during their cooking classes and would make dinner for everyone at the elder Collinses’ home. Ainsley would never forget when Loch had found out that she and Fox were taking the classes. She and Fox had wanted to keep it a secret since, first, it was kind of embarrassing that they needed so much extra help to just cook basics, and secondly, it was something just for her. And Fox, of course, but mainly something just for her. She and Fox had been walking out of class one night, and Melody and Loch had seen them. Melody hadn’t thought anything of it. Had thought she and Fox were just friends, even though Ainsley knew Fox had explained it.
Loch had gotten oddly jealous, and Ainsley had just brushed it off at the time.
But now…maybe she shouldn’t have.
It didn’t matter, though, because Fox and Melody were engaged and having a baby and Ainsley and Loch were…well, they were. She hated titles, but she guessed he was her…boyfriend? See, titles sucked.
And tonight was about family. About dinner. And about trying to calm down after a hectic and dangerous week.
“You look nervous,” Fox said from her side. “Is it because you’re a better cook than I am and you’re afraid I’ll hurt you while we do this? Or is it because this is a meet-the-parents night where the parents already know you?”
Ainsley looked over her shoulder and glared at Fox. “It’s no wonder you’re the younger brother. Pest.”
He just grinned. “Tabby’s younger than me. You, too. But, yeah, your Loch-y boy is the big, grumpy brother. And even with all the shit going on with him, he’s still smiling. I’m going to go out on a limb and thank you for that.”
She leaned against the kitchen counter, aware that she couldn’t rest for long since Barbara Collins would be in the kitchen at any moment to check on them. The fact that Loch’s mother had given up her space at all for Ainsley and Fox to try out their cooking skills for dinner either meant she’d lost a bet or actually believed something amazing could come out of this kitchen.
Or…there were emergency lasagnas in the freezer.
Either way, Ainsley was just happy that she could try to do something for the family who had taken her in when she’d thought she’d lost everything—including a mother who hadn’t been able to remain whole for her remaining daughter.
“You’re a menace, but I’m glad Melody loves you.”
Fox’s grin was wide then, his eyes bright. “She’s pretty amazing, isn’t she? And did you see her today? Her bump is bigger, though when I told her that, she kicked me in the shin.”
“Fox.”
“I know. I know. You never tell a woman she’s bigger than she was the day before. But it’s our baby. There should be a rule or something that it’s okay to say that when it’s your baby.”
“Fox.”
“Fine.”
Ainsley just grinned. Arguing with Fox was fun because he usually did all the talking. She just had to give him a look, and he understood what she meant.
“Now, we’re making mashed potatoes, roasted chicken, two veggies, rolls, and the pie you and Melody made yesterday, which is already sitting on the counter. We can do this.” She paused, suddenly unsure. “Right?”
“The chicken is already in the oven, stuffed with oranges, a lemon, and butter. We did that, and we didn’t break anything. We’re good. Now, on to the sides. The rolls are rising, and I didn’t end up with flour all over my face, so I’m counting that as a win.”
She didn’t mention that he had some in his hair, but she was pretty sure she had some in hers, as well.
“Let’s get back to it then.”
They laughed as they got back to work, Barbara coming in to check on them a few minutes later. She sweetly brushed the flour out of Fox’s hair, then did the same for Ainsley, her eyes dancing with laughter. Fox just rolled his eyes, but Ainsley leaned into the other woman’s hold, needing a hug more than she’d thought she did.
“That’s for the assist,” Ainsley said with a wink. “Flour is dangerous.”
“You don’t see me when I bake usually. You see me with holiday baking, of course, but breads and other doughs? Flour everywhere.” She patted her sides and smiled. “I just do a better job of hiding it before I walk out into the main room with everyone. You know, maybe I can get Loch to knock down that wall. I really want an open concept layout like in all those TV shows.”
“Loch is a decent handyman, but I don’t think he should be knocking down walls…” Ainsley smiled as she said it, but she could only imagine what Loch would do if he were asked to help. He’d do research, find someone to help him, and do it with his own hands just because that was who Loch was.
“True…” Barbara said, staring at the wall.
“What if it’s load-bearing?” Fox asked, and the two women looked at him. “What? I know things.”
“I don’t know if it is, but there are posts and things you can put up. Our dining room and living room are open, but the kitchen can be so closed-off sometimes.”
“Didn’t you just say you liked keeping all the flour to yourself in the kitchen?” Ainsley asked.
Barbara just rolled her eyes. “You aren’t letting me have any fun. I’m going to go out and tell Bob I want a new kitchen just to see how wide his eyes get.” Her own eyes gleamed as she left, leaving Fox and Ainsley practically rolling on the floor.
“I want to be them when I grow up,” Ainsley said.
“I know what you mean. I got pretty lucky in the parents’ department. The fact they still love each other as much now as they did almost forty years ago says much about them. You know? I want that with Melody.”
Ainsley’s heart warmed. “I think you’ll have it. You already have the foundation.”
“Should I say something along the lines of you and Loch do, as well? Or are you going to kick me in the shin? Because I already have a bruise from Melody on my right one, so will you at least use the left? I’m fragile.”
She tossed him a potato and glared. “Start peeling. And you know the rules, we don’t talk about new relationships in the kitchen.”
“You just made up that rule, so I don’t know if I want to follow it.”
“Remember, Fox, I’ll be around for that baby. I’ll be able to tell him or her all the little stories from when you were a kid that you might want to keep hidden.”
“I have my parents for that, thank you very much. Did Melody tell you my mom sent her a framed photo of me naked on a bear-skin rug? Framed, Ainsley. Framed.”
“I hope you were a baby and this wasn’t a photo from last month. That would be weird.”
He was the one who tossed the potato peel this time. “I hate you. But I love you, too. And I’m only going to say one thing. I know the world is coming at you two right now with a lot of crap that we’ll all talk about later when Nate and Misty are napping or otherwise engaged, but I’m happy for you both. Loch needs someone, and while he’s always had you because you’re amazing, I’m glad he really has you now. And, Ainsley? I’m glad you have him, too. You make each other happy, and that’s all I’ll say.” He paused. “For now.”
Then he smiled and went back to work, leaving Ainsley wondering what would happen if it all changed. If what she and Loch were fighting for somehow slipped through their fingers, she might lose everything. Not just the man she loved, but everything. Loch was so ingrained in her life, she didn’t know where she’d find the strength to knit herself and her life back together again. And if she lost Loch, despite his words, she could lose Misty and Loch’s family, as well.
The family that had taken her in and made her feel like she was one of them.
She went back to cooking, and then later, ate her meal sitting between Loch and Misty, acting as if everything were fine. It wasn’t, though. Because everyone around her was connected, was truly family. And Ainsley was one step away from that.
It might be different now, but it could all change.
And that worried her, maybe not as much as the danger lurking somewhere nearby, but enough that she couldn’t properly taste the food everyone said was amazing. She didn’t want to not have Loch in her life, but she also knew she probably couldn’t go back to being just friends.
He was her everything, despite her attempts for it not to be that way.
She let out a breath and smiled, though she knew Loch saw something in her eyes that worried him. She’d tell him her feelings. Later. After Riker had been caught and Loch was safe. For now, she’d smile and pretend that she wasn’t worried about what would happen if it all ended. It didn’t help anything to worry about something that might not happen at all.
But it was that might that would keep her up at night.
No matter how hard she tried to pretend it wouldn’t.