Chapter 18

Reading Chelly’s distress, Sean said, “Here’s the diaper bag. I’ll help you.”

When Chelly didn’t move right away, he nudged her elbow.

She stood, Riana nestled in her arms like treasured crystal.

“Want me to carry her?” he asked.

Chelly’s eyes were pools of fright. “Why? Am I holding her wrong?”

“No, you’re doing fine.” He touched her back to lend support as they walked toward the sun porch.

“I haven’t held a baby since Maya died. Can you believe that?”

Yes, he could. With his palm near Chelly’s shoulder blades, he could swear he felt her palpitating heart doing triple time while his own heart broke over her anguish. He wished he could take her pain away, but how? Swat teams defused stress with talk. He’d borrow their strategy. “I haven’t held kids much, either. My friend Simon had a daughter. Well, he thought she was his until he found out differently. Cute kid.”

“When they put Maya in my arms, I wouldn’t have cared if she’d been born with three heads. All I knew is that I loved her and had to protect her.” She gingerly laid Riana on the couch, sat beside her, and sighed. “I failed.”

“Chelly, I’m sure you were a terrific mother. You’re being impossibly hard on yourself.”

She smiled weakly, pushing her bangs back before taking a shaky breath. Sweat glistened on her brow. “I, uh…I hope you know how to change a diaper.”

“How would I know how to change a diaper? I saw your face, though, and figured between the two of us, we could handle it.”

“Okay,” she ran her palms up and down her thighs. Riana looked up at her.

“Um…so, like, when do they get toilet trained anyway?” Sean asked.

“What? When they’re two or almost two, I think.” She glanced away from him and down at the patient and trusting Riana, who lay contentedly watching them. “She’s a sweet little girl.”

“I think you have to unsnap something,” Sean prompted.

“Right.” She sought the snaps of Riana’s pants and tugged, transforming the pants into a long skirt.

“Your mother’s right. She’s awfully quiet,” Sean said.

Chelly felt Riana’s brow and her back. “She’s not warm.” She unfastened the diaper; the process was coming back to her, along with her fever-checking instinct. “Hand me a wipe, please, Sean.”

Sean searched the backpack for something that could be called a wipe until he found a flat blue plastic case that held the wipes. “When do kids talk?”

“I don’t know. I used to know, but I don’t remember these things anymore.”

He handed her a wipe and then a diaper in exchange for the soiled one, which was heavily soaked with urine, but thankfully nothing more. He gagged anyway and held the soggy, warm mass as far out of front of him as he could. Instinct pointed him towards the outside trash can. He headed for the back door, then, realizing he shouldn’t leave Chelly, he turned, then pivoted between the two choices, struggling with the law of survival. He could save himself first and then be there for Chelly and Riana, or he could risk illness and be unable to support either of them.

Seeing his dilemma, Chelly laughed. “You’re funny.”

“Will you be all right if I—”

“Yes. I’m okay. The trick is to fasten the diaper so it’s not too tight or too loose. I can do this.”

Assured, he dashed out the door and back in thirty seconds, telling himself to get a grip. Sean predicted he’d be buying Depends for Kelvin before Christmas.

Chelly laughed again when he sprinted back to her side, and Riana laughed, too. In fact, Riana suddenly found him hilarious. Whatever it took, he thought. “Is it on?”

“Yeah.” Chelly resnapped the final snap of Riana’s pants and pulled Riana into a sitting position. Riana grabbed a tiny book that featured a bear family and handed it to Sean.

Sean sat next to Riana, thinking he needed to wash his hands. He reached for a wipe instead, then took the book. “Why isn’t she talking?”

“I don’t know. Nicole and Isaac seem like a caring couple. I’m sure they’re on top of everything. I think she wants you to read to her.”

“They’re kids, Chelly. They’re both teenagers.”

“That’s true.”

“She’s got a great voice, though. When her voice matures, she’s going to be the next Roberta Flack or Diana Krall.”

“Could be.” Chelly grasped her hands together as if they were chilled and she wanted to warm them.

“You’re shaking,” Sean said.

“No, I’m okay.” She took a deep breath and let it out. “It’s therapeutic, you know, like the airport. Thank you for helping again. Give me the book. I’ll read to her. Let’s see what this story is about, Riana.”

Here they sat, the image of the perfect family, except he’d lay odds Chelly didn’t want more kids, which was fine with him. He’d need to channel his energy into getting his restaurant off the ground, and, besides, he was, no doubt, predisposed to cancer. He’d either pass it on or die sooner than he cared to think about.

Riana decided she didn’t want to hear a story, but would rather hold the book, only to drop it and pick it up again and again and again.

“I like your friends. Most of them, anyway,” Sean said.

“The main thing is that Kelvin’s having a good time. That was weird the way Jaden showed up. I’m sorry about that.”

“That key you gave me.”

“What about it?”

“It didn’t work. When I got to your place, Jaden was there.”

Her eyes grew to the size of half dollars. “At my house? The key that I gave you is the one he gave back to me. I don’t know what he thinks he’s up to, but I promise you I will get to the bottom of it.”

Chelly scooped Riana into her arms and kissed her. “There. This wasn’t so bad. I’ve been scared to do this for ten years, and I did it and my world didn’t stop spinning.”

“Are you guys okay out here?” Nicole asked, coming through the doorway.

“Yes, everything’s fine. Sorry we’re taking so long. Just chatting,” Chelly said.

Riana reached for her mother’s arms and settled into them. “Do you have kids, Chelly?”

“No.”

“Me, either,” said Sean, anxious to not leave Chelly alone in her despair.

“I love being a mother,” Nicole said.

Chelly blanched and Sean reached for her hand, searching for a way to redirect the conversation. “You want to help us make coffee, Nicole?”

“Sure. Mrs. Rankin was telling us that you’re a chef, Sean. I didn’t know that. You’re a man of many talents.” She smiled at him like he ruled a small nation. Sean thought her blatant adoration had to be innocent or else Nicole was a drama junkie trying to stir up some mess flirting with Sean with her man right in the next room.

“Well, we tend to be good at what we like.” He laughed as he and Chelly stood. “I enjoy cooking.”

“I can’t wait to find out what else you enjoy doing,” Nicole said.

Sean paused a beat, absorbing that comment as well.

“I can help you out there,” Chelly spoke up. “He’s into making me a very happy woman in every creative and thoughtful way possible, and I’m into showing him my gratitude on a minute-by-minute basis.” With that, she planted a juicy kiss on Sean’s lips that caught him pleasantly off guard for the second time that day.

When they parted, Nicole’s silence was in tune with Riana’s.

Chelly layered a smile on top of her nonchalant expression. “I need a knife.”

“What?” Nicole said, holding Riana closer. “Why?”

“Because nobody has cut into that cobbler yet, and I’ve waited long enough.”

* * *

In the kitchen, Nicole filled the carafe with water while holding Riana on one hip. Chelly, persuaded to wait for the coffee before enjoying a slice of cobbler, found the filters and the can of Folgers. Sean took down cups and saucers.

“How long have you and Isaac been together?” Chelly asked, further establishing boyfriend boundaries.

“A few months. We met back in February. How about you two?”

“Not long,” Chelly answered with a grin. She looked at Nicole and Riana and silently chastised herself for feeling threatened. Nicole was a kid raising a kid; both were pretty little girls, really. As an older man, Sean probably represented security more than anything else. “Are you interested in acting? We’re always looking for members who want the kind of experience a community acting troupe can offer.”

“I don’t know. I might be interested in a play where I had a singing role, but I’ve never done anything like that before. The only singing I do is in the shower, and I’ve never acted.”

“You have talent, Nicole. I was telling Chelly that,” Sean said, entering the kitchen.

“Really?” Nicole asked, looking pleased.

“Good,” Isaac said, joining them. “I can be your business manager and we’ll open in Vegas. Oh wait. Is this before or after you win American Idol?” He chuckled, obviously amused.

His sarcasm momentarily spoiled the now genial atmosphere. Everyone’s silence seemed to deflate Isaac’s joviality. “It’s just that I already told Nicole I don’t know how she’s going to work these piano lessons into her schedule. There’s no way in the world she’d have time for acting in plays.”

Nicole looked as if she wanted to say something, but thought better of it. Chelly had a word or two for him about the fine art of not being a dream killer, but, at the last second, she changed her tune. “I can help you find a babysitter, Nicole, if that’s the issue.”

“Thank you,” Nicole said. “That’s not the problem. Ree’s had her share of babysitters. Probably too many, but I think that’s why she’s so easygoing around people.”

“Are you in school, too?” Sean asked Isaac.

“Naw, man, I’m out here working like a dog every day. I’m a UPS package handler, waiting for my shot at being a driver.”

“That’s cool. I hear they’re a good company to work for,” Sean said.

“Yeah, it’s a decent salary, you know, for those of us who are just out there making a living and not planning to graduate with some big-time degree, like some folks.”

The rest of the party guests had given the piano and the TV a rest and had put on music to do the Electric Slide. Brenda danced in, literally, but not before Chelly and Sean exchanged worried looks. Isaac came across like someone who didn’t know the meaning of supportive.

“Coffee. Perfect!” Brenda announced. “And I see everyone survived the diaper change.” She gave Chelly a meaningful nod that said I told you so. “I knew you could do it.” She caressed Chelly’s cheek and then walked over to Riana and caressed hers as well. “Nicole, why isn’t Riana talking? How old is she?”

“She’ll be two December twenty-sixth.”

“Twenty-two months and I haven’t heard a peep out of her. What does your pediatrician say?”

“He doesn’t know. He’s tested her hearing and looked at her throat. He says everything is fine. Says she’ll talk when she’s ready to talk.”

“And that’s cool, because you know once women start talking, you can’t get a word in edgewise,” Isaac added. “You know what I’m saying?”

Nicole gave him a tight smile. Chelly hoped her sigh was inaudible. Isaac was an asshole.

Kelvin entered the kitchen. “Will she let me hold her?”

“Sure,” Nicole said. “You want to sit down first?”

He slowly sat in a kitchen chair and Nicole gently unloaded Riana into his lap. “I’ve been keeping my eye on her. Smart as a whip, this one. I can see it in her eyes. Get this baby a little ice cream.”

Sean served the peach cobbler slightly warm. Everyone agreed; it was delicious plain or á la mode.