Who Are You
and What Are Your Choices?
Which of these Profiles Best Describes You?
By now you should have a pretty good idea about who you are and which of the options we have outlined in this book has the best chance of helping you achieve a prosperous and interesting life. No one ever fits exactly into a category — but there are some general patterns that do make sense. You know much of this now: if you are curious, university is a good bet. If you like to work with your hands, an apprenticeship program can be great.
So, to wind up this long lecture, here is a rough guide to various profiles of young people, with suggestions for which options might best suit them. As always, we want you to be honest with yourself as you consider where you might best belong. This definitely is no place for cheating on yourself.
The Seeker
You are looking for deeper meaning in life, beyond money and career, are smart, intelligent, highly motivated, but don’t know what to do with your potential. Thank goodness for you. The world needs more like you, people who care deeply about the environment, social justice, and spirituality. Take time to define your place in Canada and the world. A year of travel and volunteering could help a lot. If you are religious, Bible colleges provide excellent opportunities for personal and spiritual development — and many are good academically as well. So, take the time to explore — the world, your options, and your place in society — and give yourself the time to build the skills you need to make a difference with your life. Volunteer with a not-for-profit organization and discover some of the thousands of people out there who share your passion for making the world a better place.
The Swarm Member
You know who you are. You are not a reader, do not write much, do not particularly like school, plod along with average grades, lack motivation, and have no idea what you want to do in life. You are going with the flow, following your classmates into college and university prep classes, looking into the same schools as your friends, and tuning out parents and teachers when they talk about the need to raise your game. You are undeservedly confident and may be heading for a real crash. You can get into university or college if you decide to go, but remember that that is no great accomplishment these days. In many ways, we wrote this book for you. You are the kind of student who sits in the back of the first-year lecture hall, rarely does the reading, hands in mediocre assignments, and looks terminally bored by the whole college or university experience. You are — not to mince words — not ready for the big time. You need time to mature, develop a focus in life, and decide what you want to make of yourself. There is no “royal road” out there, no employers waiting to offer you jobs at $60,000 a year. You might muddle your way through university; but you will likely crash and burn on the job hunt. Your boredom and casualness are serious turn-offs to would-be employees, who have their radar set for underachievers like you. You really need a reset. You need to consider all of the options we have laid out here and you need to slow down your rush through life. You need to prove yourself, through volunteering, work, or business — and you need to find your purpose in life. Trust us.
The Brain
You are really smart and hard-working, you love to read, and you are ambitious. Head to university and consider the professions, including medicine. Realize that you will have many options in life, and be open to exploring new possibilities as they emerge throughout your studies. Remember, too, that at university you will not likely stand out from the crowd as much as you did at high school. You are the one that universities love to teach. But there is no easy route to real success, and many of you will experience two disconcerting things: your grades may drop, often substantially, and some people who finished behind you in high school will soar to the front of the class. So here’s a warning. If you had to work like a beaver to get top grades in high school, you may be in for a shock. University is much harder. Students who worked moderately hard at their schoolwork and did lots of other things make the best university students. Obsessive students often have trouble adjusting to the more free-form system at university. So, turn on the afterburners.
The Thinker
You are intelligent, love to read, have strong writing skills, but are not strong in math or science. Too bad. You should have worked harder and sooner on the math and science, for you have narrowed your university and polytechnic options considerably. No degree in civil engineering for you! But there are many good opportunities for you — including law, teaching, and government service. These days, too many of you are heading into business, but give serious thoughts to an arts program as well. People like you, if they are really good and willing to work hard, can succeed anywhere — in business too. You should follow your instincts about university, taking a broad first-year program and looking for a field of study that really interests you.
The Builder
You are good with your hands and like to make things, but you are a non-reader — that is, you rarely pick up a book, magazine, or newspaper to read for pleasure. If you did reasonably well in high school, you are probably being pushed toward university. Pay attention to the warning signs: non-readers do not do well in university. There are great options out there, but you should probably focus on the polytechs, colleges, or apprenticeships — or spend some time in the workforce before you take the plunge. Remember that there’s good money in the skilled trades. Many of you will do very well in life, and could easily out-earn a lot of those heading directly to university. Surprise yourself. Surprise everyone.
The Waffler
You are reasonably smart, you lack specific goals — but you like money and the good life. You are a candidate for the swarm, but are academically better than most of that group. You are one of those being directed toward university, even though your heart is not really in it. If you have entrepreneurial skills you may be okay, as long as you have a strong work ethic. But you could have a difficult future, and the first year in post-secondary education could be a real shock. We are worried about you. Take some time off — volunteer, work, and get your act together. You can go to college, polytech, or university if you are really committed, but you will be wasting your time if you are not prepared to make a life change in doing so. Remember, you are in danger of becoming a swarm member, of falling into the undifferentiated mass that is heading into a career and financial desert. This is your chance to stop waffling and decide that you are going to exploit all of the talent and ability that you possess. Nothing less will do.
The Techie
You are smart, reliable, hard-working, inventive, but non-bookish. You are well suited for the polytech alternative. Colleges and apprenticeship programs are other good options. But even here, know that the best opportunities will go to people who read. You have great opportunities ahead and the business world is really looking for people like you. But start reading more. Become a real specialist in areas that you find interesting and make sure you get some work experience. In the current economy, you have surprisingly good opportunities, but you have to apply yourself — harder than ever — if you want the best ones.
The Reacher
You come from a disadvantaged family background. You have not been treated fairly in life, and have discovered that the system does not really cut you a lot of slack for poverty, family circumstances, isolation, and other challenges. You have probably faced many struggles in your youth, but you are intelligent and willing to work hard to get ahead. Many of you, particularly from single-parent families, have an inspiring parent pushing you on. You may be unaware of the real opportunities available for you and likely underestimate your skills and options. We worry about you, mostly because you are likely to undersell yourself. Rich kids do better than you in school, but you are probably every bit as smart and talented. Seek out a trusted teacher, a counsellor, or a community mentor — and pay close attention. They have a better sense of your potential than you do. Don’t let anyone — including yourself — sell you short. We admire you for seeking to capitalize on your basic abilities. By the way, there is a fair bit of assistance, financial and otherwise, from community groups, colleges, polytechs, and universities for people in your situation.
The Rich Kid
You have enormous advantages, great social skills, and a healthy sense of entitlement. While your parents’ money may buffer you from most of the realities of life, we are worried about you too. Money can get you a car and all sorts of electronic gizmos, but it cannot write your examinations, get you to work on time, or motivate you. Take the best lessons from your parents and their friends — entrepreneurship, drive, ambition, work ethic, and, yes, money — but realize that you need to be your own person. Dump the sense of entitlement; there are no easy paths to achievement. Capitalize on your privilege, and realize that you can make a difference in the world. Consider taking some time to volunteer. You could probably do with a reality check about how the rest of the world lives. We’ve met a lot of you at universities over the years. You came to complain about your grades, and some of you had your parents call in to support your case. Tacky. And counterproductive. It is devastating to fail when your parents have given you so many advantages — but it is possible, and painful to watch. Buckle down and prove yourself.
The High School Hero
There are adults who see high school as the best years of their lives. You may be a high school athlete or campus leader — with great social skills and a reasonable academic record — but you feel seriously unsure about the future. You must know that very few of you are going on to become professional athletes. In our world, the best ones are marked for greatness in their early teens. Being the best athlete in a mid-sized regional high school might not even put you in the top hundred in your province. So, what now? If you are a good athlete — and, surprisingly, the best opportunities may be in the smaller sports, such as gymnastics, golf, or diving — look into athletic scholarships, including in the United States, where they are more generous. American colleges have great deals — up to free tuition and room and board — for top athletes. Canadian colleges, polytechs, and universities offer a lot less money, but they generally support their athletes well (often better than the general student population). If you truly love your sport, even if it will not be a full career, why not ride it as far as you can? If you don’t know what you want to do career-wise, consider taking a year off to work, travel, or volunteer. You need to put the cheering crowds and high school heroics behind you and focus on your career and educational prospects.
The Tiger Mom Survivor
You have intense parents. You have done well in school and have high grades and an impressive list of accomplishments. Your parents have been on your case since elementary school, insisting on music lessons, extra-curricular homework (don’t you love Kumon, Oxford, and the Sylvan Learning Centres?), volunteer activities, and a sport or two. They have driven you mercilessly, and you are tired of the lack of free time and the control exerted by your parents. Take the time to give your folks a big hug and a great “thank you.” You are better prepared than most for what lies ahead. Sure they pushed you — to be ready for a harsh, competitive world where the advantages go to the most intense and highly motivated people. You have real potential at university, polytech, or college. Don’t resent what your parents did to and for you. In the years to come, you will discover how much better prepared you were for adulthood than your classmates who were coddled and spoiled by their parents. But speak frankly to them about what you want. While they often have fixed ideas — medicine, law, accounting — about what you should do, many will change their minds if you show you have done your homework. If that doesn’t work, consider drawing a teacher or guidance counsellor into the conversation.
The Challenge Survivor
An increasing number of students with serious learning difficulties and mental health issues are making it through high school and even through college and university by virtue of enormously hard work and parental devotion. These are people who, two generations ago, would have been simply sidelined — and we heartily applaud them for their achievements. Only those young people wrestling with these challenges — and their parents and siblings, of course — understand in full the frustrations, difficulties, and effort required to succeed. Our elementary and secondary schools have many more supports than in the past, providing young people with a platform upon which they can build a choice of futures. Post-secondary institutions provide similar assistance, and many more students are overcoming psychological or other barriers to learning. Our country is much the better for their determination. They may face other challenges with the transition to the workplace. We think, though, that if you can master the world of post-secondary education, you can probably master anything, and we have no fears for your future. Good for you. Do not, however, assume that the next stages will be easy or automatic, as there are significant barriers to advancement still in place. The work ethic and sheer guts you needed to move forward, however, have likely prepared you well for the difficult issues of the workforce.
The Rest
These profiles cover the great majority of Canadian high school graduates. Simple categories, of course, never cover everyone. There are other groups — Stoners, Drop-Outs, Juvenile Delinquents — who face real challenges in the coming years. Some of you — are you reading this book? — were ill-served by being kept in high school until you were eighteen years old. You would have been far better off getting some work experience — and a jolt of reality — starting at sixteen. Too bad that government makes this route so difficult. If you are in this category you will need to make a strong effort to succeed in life. But it can be done, and we urge you to do it. Someone in this category who reads and can write reasonably well can recover and find good opportunities down the road. Ditto those with technical skills, from car mechanics to computer programmers. Most of you, particularly those with behavioural or social issues, need time to grow into your brain. While your classmates are facing difficult choices at seventeen and eighteen, you will have your turn ten years later. When the time is right, colleges are great places to relaunch yourself, and apprenticeships can serve very nicely if you are technically minded. Like it or not, you are going to have time off now, probably to find a job of some sort. Life is not over at eighteen — not by a long shot. Surprise yourself, your parents, and your classmates. You can make a lot of your life — but it will take hard work. You are part of a large group in Canada — and government, business and the education system are seriously worried about you. Unless you, collectively, get your act together, this country could be in serious difficulty.
A Final Note to Students
In the end, the decision about the future is really up to you. Parents are influential, and so are teachers. They have your best interests at heart, but they are not going to live the rest of your life for you. Don’t underestimate the importance of the choice you are about to make. There are tens of thousands of dollars in immediate costs involved — and a career of earning and opportunity waiting to be defined.
We know it’s hard. Life is like that — awkward, complicated, unnerving, and very, very real. You are about to become an adult — and we know that the prospect is scarier than most of you are prepared to admit. There are no easy paths ahead. Hard work, curiosity, intelligence, integrity, and character will ultimately matter more than whatever credential you end up with. Welcome to the reality of the twenty-first century. It is a jungle out there, with no easy path and no obvious choices. If we have alerted you to the wide range of possibilities and convinced you to take this post-high school decision very seriously, we have done our job. Over to you.
A Final Note to Parents
We have been rough on you. We are parents, and grandparents too. These have been hard decades to be a parent, with the pressures of economic uncertainty, popular culture, drugs, teenage sexuality, and on and on. Oh, for the easier times of our youth, right? But North American parenting has been a significant part of the problem facing our children. Many parents have been permissive, and have given their children everything they possibly could want — probably too much and too soon. We bought into the cult of self-esteem, without realizing that telling our children they can be all they want to be is hokum. (Did that work for you? Great if it did — but Ken dreamed of being a major league baseball player and that plan never made it past Babe Ruth League.) The global economy has been tough. You know this, in your own lives and in those of friends and neighbours around you. And you want what is best for your kids. We get that.
But be wary of following the crowd, of assuming that the learning = earning mantra of our age actually means something. You need to help your children get the right opportunities, not the popular ones. If they are truly ready for university, then prepare them for it, save money (and make them pay part of the cost), and support them in their exploration of campuses and programs. Try not to impose your will on them. Instead, focus on encouraging them to keep their options open rather than narrow their vision to a single degree. Make sure they keep up their math and science in high school, support a broad first-year program so that they can explore post-secondary opportunities, go with them to visit colleges, universities, or polytechs. If they are uncertain, do not rush them. A year of work, travel, or volunteering could do them a world of good.
Your greatest challenge is going to be letting go. Your children are young adults. They have to become independent-minded, even if that means making mistakes and suffering broken dreams. Congratulations on getting your sons or daughters through to high school graduation. While academically this is not the challenge it once was, socially it is a much harder task than in the past. A complex, ever-changing world awaits them. You have done your very best to get them ready.
* * *
We want to end by returning to a point we have made repeatedly. To students: try to avoid going with the flow — what we’ve called the swarm. In our new world, specialization and differentiation matter much more than being part of the crowd that, lemming-like, may be heading for the employment and career cliff. Canada’s system of colleges, polytechs, universities, and apprenticeship programs provides many avenues for personal development. Work, entrepreneurship, volunteering, and travel add to the range of options. To parents: your children — your young adults — need the ability to navigate the world on their own, and on their own terms. Support them in this vital journey, even if it takes a markedly different path than you had anticipated. Their future is not going to be the same as our past. If we are lucky, it will be even better, with more opportunities and additional benefits. But, finally, it is their world, not yours, or ours. It is our duty to launch them on their way. From this point on, they are in control.