It was two days since she’d made her discovery and she still had no idea of what she was going to do. In the office, Josh had been the same as ever—focussed, professional—yet every now and then she’d caught him watching her as if something else weighed on his mind. They hadn’t been intimate since the weekend, and she found herself missing that special closeness they’d shared.
She started at her desk, her senses on instant alert as Josh came through from his office.
“Callie, I’d like you to type up these notes now—top priority and top level confidentiality. Make certain you password the file with this code.”
She noted the code he’d written on the top of the sheets of his hand-scrawled notes.
“Do you want these back when I’ve completed the computer file or should I destroy them?”
“Destroy them. The file is all we’ll need.”
He turned to go back into his office.
“Josh? Is everything okay?” she asked, rising from her seat and walking over to him.
To her relief, he smiled and bent down slightly to kiss her cheek.
“Everything’s fine, just busy—making up for losing the Flinders contract to Palmers.”
Callie felt guilt run cold through her veins. The Flinders contract had been the one she’d given the information on to Irene. It was what she’d had to do at the time, but now she wished she’d never agreed to be the go-between in this crazy game. She wasn’t cut out for the subterfuge or the emotional cost it demanded.
“With any luck, the material you’re working on today will cover that quite nicely,” Josh smiled. “Are you busy tonight?”
Callie dragged her thoughts together. “No, I don’t have any plans.”
“Let’s have dinner together.”
“I tell you what,” she started, thinking quickly. She didn’t want the anonymity of some restaurant tonight. She needed Josh’s attention on her and only her if she was to assure herself that nothing was wrong between them. “Why don’t I cook for you?”
“Are you sure you wouldn’t rather go out?”
“I’m certain,” she said, nodding for good measure. “What time will you be finished tonight?”
“I’ve got that meeting away from the office at four-thirty,” he considered, and she could see him mentally juggling how long it would be expected to take. “I can be at your place by seven, but why don’t you go around to my place instead. It’s closer to where I’ll be and I can get there to be with you sooner.”
“Perfect. I’ll bring everything over for dinner.”
“Bring a change of clothes for tomorrow while you’re at it,” he said. He handed her an electronic key. “Here, you’ll need this. It’ll open the gate and garage door. Just leave the gate open for me.”
“And the alarm?”
He repeated a numerical code, which she committed to memory.
Excitement unfurled within her. Clearly, he couldn’t suspect her of wrongdoing. She still stood a chance of making things work, of maybe even turning his need for revenge into something else. Realistically, she knew she’d be fighting against a current that had roared through his life for far too long, but she had to hope that somehow she could make a difference.
The sheaf of notes Josh had given Callie were extensive. How he’d managed to corner another proposal so quickly after losing the Flinders job explained why he was so successful. As Callie automatically transcribed his crabbed handwriting, she started to mentally plan for the evening ahead. She wanted everything to be perfect.
It was exactly a month until Christmas. Would it be too early to give him a gift? Perhaps herself, gift-wrapped in something special? At lunchtime she found the perfect thing. A rich burgundy satin nightgown and matching organza peignoir. She couldn’t wait to see Josh’s face when she wore it.
It was nearly five o’clock before she finished typing up the notes. She was getting her handbag from her drawer, in readiness to leave the office, when the strident shriek of the building alarm cut through her thoughts like a hot knife through butter. She knew the routine—drill or genuine alarm, she had to leave her office immediately.
As far as confidentiality was concerned, everything on her computer was set to auto backup already, and her computer itself would lock down without activity within five minutes. But that left the notes Josh had given her. She hadn’t shredded them yet and had no time to do that now.
Callie folded the sheets up and shoved them in her bag. She’d have to shred them when she came back once the building had the all-clear, but she couldn’t leave them lying around. As she joined the throng of staff members in the stairwell, and steeled herself for the long climb to the ground floor, she hoped this was only a drill and that they’d be back inside soon.
Her hopes were dashed as she waited at the staff assembly point. A small fire had started elsewhere in the building and the fire department had said it would be some time before they’d be letting everyone back in. The news was met with groans of dismay as most people would have to wait for the all-clear to be able to go inside and recover their means to return home.
Callie thanked her lucky stars she had her bag with her. While she couldn’t get into the underground car park to retrieve her car until the building was reopened, she could certainly taxi home and then taxi to Josh’s place. Once cleared by the building warden that she could go, she did exactly that.
The cab driver was all too happy to stop outside a nearby supermarket so she could gather the ingredients she wanted for the dinner she’d planned tonight, and then, for a nominal extra fee, to wait while she rushed inside her town house and gathered her things for the night ahead.
By the time she reached Josh’s house, she was racing. She dropped the ingredients for her dinner preparations in the kitchen. She put on a large pot of water to boil, and set to work slicing onions and garlic together with mushrooms and bacon for the fettuccine she’d decided on. At least the meal was quick and easy to prepare.
She hummed to herself as the aromas from the fry pan blended together and she added the ribbons of fresh pasta to the boiling water before stirring in cream and parmesan to the ingredients in the pan. The fresh pasta was ready in minutes and, once drained and lightly tossed with the sauce, she slid the whole mixture into a large shallow bowl, covered it with foil and set it in the oven to keep warm.
A quick cleanup in the kitchen and she was ready to race upstairs to the master bedroom where she stripped off her work clothes and underwear and slid into the nightgown and peignoir. She took a minute to freshen her fragrance, the spritz between her breasts sending a shimmer of something more to spiral through her.
The swish of her nightgown between her thighs as she made her way back downstairs started up a thrill of longing that beat from her core. She couldn’t wait for Josh to arrive home. A smile danced across her lips. There was something deliciously decadent about not wearing any undergarments. It ranked right up there with skinny-dipping in the rain.
Callie distracted herself by setting the dining room table and searched out a couple of candles to dress it up a little. She remembered seeing some lovely squat scented candles in the living room the last time she was here.
In the living room her eyes were inexorably drawn to the bookcase and, more particularly, to the small chest that sat there. In it lay the seed of Josh’s bitterness. The only physical evidence he had to say who his father really was.
Callie reached out and let her fingers rest on the lid. What would Josh be like now, she wondered, if those letters had never existed? Would he have been as driven to triumph in his chosen market? Had his very need for revenge been the catalyst that saw him reach the heights he knew today or would he have gotten there anyway? Had his father, by his neglect, inversely created Josh’s success?
In the distance she heard a door slam and she jumped, knocking the box. Surprisingly, the lid jumped, too. Josh hadn’t relocked it. She lifted the lid cautiously, as if doing so would unleash the miseries of Pandora’s box, then let the lid drop closed again. Obviously, he’d forgotten.
Footsteps echoed on the parquet floor of the entrance hall as Josh came through from the garage. She snatched her hand away and wheeled from the bookcase, all thoughts of the box and its contents banished from her mind as he entered the room.
“Something smells good,” he commented. “I was worried you might be late. I got a call about the tower.”
“Nothing was going to stop me being here with you tonight,” Callie said as she eased into his embrace and lifted her face for his kiss.
Her heart beat double-time in her chest by the time he released her.
“Dinner’s ready,” she said, slipping from his arms. “I was just getting some candles for the table.”
“It can wait,” Josh growled, reaching for her again. “Right now I want you.”
“Right now?”
Excitement thrilled through her.
“Oh, yes.”
Josh swept her up into his arms and headed straight up the stairs, his breath barely showing signs of any strain. In his bedroom he kicked the door closed behind them and gently lowered her to her feet.
“I like this,” he said, pushing aside her peignoir and sweeping his hand over the slinky fabric of her nightgown.
“It feels beautiful, but—” his hand slid under the hem of the gown and pushed upward until he cupped her bottom “—I like the feel of you more.”
“It’s your early Christmas gift,” Callie gasped.
Rational thought fled her mind as his fingers slid over her buttocks and then traced down until they reached the cleft between her thighs. Heat and moisture gathered there as his fingers teased her sensitive flesh.
“So that means I get to unwrap it,” he said with a smile.
Josh withdrew his hand, quickly slipped out of his jacket and yanked his tie out from under the collar of his shirt. Several buttons popped as he undid his shirt and pulled it free from his trousers. Callie could only stand and watch as he stripped down to his black briefs, and tremble as he walked toward her—his eyes darkest blue, his face a mask of determined perfection.
He reached for her and eased the peignoir from her shoulders, stopping to kiss each exposed inch of flesh until she quivered with desire. He eased her back onto the bed and trailed his fingers from her ankles upward to the hem of the gown, then, with his hands clenched in the satin, he pushed the fabric up, exposing her to him.
His eyes darkened even more as he gazed upon her. If it were possible, she felt even wetter, more primed for him than she was already. And when he bent his head to her, taking her in his mouth, swirling her flesh with his tongue, grazing her nerve endings ever so softly with his teeth, she let her eyes close, her head drop back, and gave herself over to sensation.
It was dark by the time they finally made their way back downstairs to eat dinner. Even though the meal had dried out somewhat in the oven, that did nothing to deter their appetite. Eventually, they took their glasses and the opened bottle of wine upstairs to attend to other, undiminished hungers.
Afterwards, Josh fell into a deep slumber. Despite the lateness and her own weariness, Callie couldn’t sleep. Instead, she watched the man at her side, bathed in silver strands of moonlight, and never more beautiful to her than he’d ever been before. Her heart swelled with the solid truth that she finally allowed herself to admit. She loved him. Totally, and wholly.
She wished she could do something, anything, to release him from the demons that drove him. To allow him the surcease of acceptance. But that was something only he could attain. He had to want it, embrace it.
His plans for revenge against Bruce Palmer and his family were what propelled him, what gave his work purpose. But what of the man? Could he ever let go of the bitterness inside, even if he saw his plan through? And what of the damage to the Palmers?
Callie knew what Bruce had done all those years ago was unforgivable, but time had a way of blurring the edges. Even though his behaviour with Josh’s mother had been reprehensible, his life afterwards had been anything but. Callie was certain he hadn’t so much as put a foot wrong in all the years since. He’d built his family and his business and he’d given to the community and the country unstintingly; hence the accolade of the upcoming consular position.
Maybe his behaviour had been his own way of compensating for the way he’d treated Josh and his mother. Who knew? But Callie understood better than most that his appointment as the honorary consul to Guildara was based on Bruce Palmer, the man. The man he was now.
Was it fair to destroy that? She didn’t think so. Bruce still had so much good to give to the world. If Josh had his way, the older man would be destroyed. Pilloried in the public eye. Despite what he’d done to Josh, Callie still owed it to Bruce not to let that happen.
She slid from the bed and reached for her peignoir, not even fully understanding what she was about to do, just knowing in her heart of hearts that she had to do it. She had to destroy the contents of that box before Josh could use them against Bruce. Hopefully, then Josh could begin to heal the scar on his own heart.
Moonlight shone bright into the sitting room, but even if it had been pitch dark Callie knew she’d unerringly be able to find her target. She took the box from its place on the bookshelf. Her heart beat a staccato rhythm as she lifted the lid and removed the stack of envelopes inside.
She knew she had no right to do this. No right at all. But someone had to stop the cycle of hurt. Someone had to put an end to the anger and the accusations.
She moved over to the deep fireplace set into the wall and knelt on the hearth. She knew she’d seen a firelighter somewhere in the inglenook. Her fingers closed over the very item she was looking for and she breathed a silent prayer of thanks.
Callie set the firelighter on the hearth next to the bundle of letters and undid the ribbon that bound them together. A twinge of sorrow cut through her at the thought that the love contained within the words on those pages would be destroyed forever. But, she rationalised, that very love had wrought the complete opposite effect. And that effect had to be stopped now.
She lifted one envelope from the top of the stack and held it over the grate, her fingers shaking as she clicked the small ignition switch on the firelighter over and over again. A faint blue spark appeared at the end of the firelighter. A blue spark that with a small hiss turned into a golden flame.
She could feel the tears now, feel them burn within her eyes and scald her cheeks as she put the flame to the paper. The edge of the envelope lit up, glowing briefly before darkness consumed it, blackening the paper even as its contents had blackened Josh’s heart.
Callie was sobbing now, lifting the next envelope and the next, adding them to the tiny blaze.
Light unexpectedly flooded the room and Callie heard a male shout. Josh peremptorily pushed her aside, a small fire extinguisher in his hands. He dealt with the flames, snatching the lesser-damaged letters from the fireplace and spreading them on the hearth where they smouldered like the fury etched on his face.
Looking up into his eyes, Callie knew this was the end of all she’d hoped for. The end of all her dreams. He’d never forgive her for this. Never understand that she’d done it for him.