Josie was discovering that there was something about holding someone’s dead head in your hands that made you appreciate every single thing about being alive. The only thing to do with her own fleeting life was to live it because one day her skull would be empty too, and she’d be that way for a long time.
Meg and Rik were twins.
She was amazed that Senara hadn’t noticed the joy that had coursed through her at those words. Actually Senara had seen it, but she’d thought it meant she fancied Rik too. Josie wanted to laugh at the very idea. Rik! FFS. It was Meg. Megmegmegmegmeg.
She was transfixed by Meg. From the moment she’d seen her. She believed, now, in love at first sight.
Love?
It wasn’t not love. It was something at first sight, something big, and the world had fractured. Meg didn’t have a boyfriend after all. She had a brother.
This was the most real thing Josie had ever felt.
She didn’t want to think about Meg going home. She pushed away all thoughts of Mum, of the future, of her uncle, and even of Rachel Thomas and the skull in the ground. She made an effort to seize this happiness.
‘I’ll come with you,’ said Meg when Josie said she had to go home. ‘I won’t come in. I’ll just walk back with you, if that’s OK. I don’t want to intrude. I’d like to have a walk through the village.’
‘Brilliant,’ said Josie, grinning at Meg, who held the eye contact. She ran her hand over her short hair and wondered what Meg thought of it. She’d been out of her mind when she did it, but now she was used to it she thought she might keep it short.
They set off down the drive. The two of them, walking together. Josie was taller. Meg took more steps than she did, to keep up, and Josie slowed her pace to accommodate her. ‘I can’t believe you spent the night on a train last night,’ she said. ‘You must be knackered.’
Meg turned her eyes on her. ‘I kind of am? But also not. The whole day has felt trippy. I mean, did all that really just happen? All this.’
The skull and its implications were trying to push the exciting things away, but it wasn’t working. The exciting bits pushed back because here she was, walking down the drive with Megan. She swung between the two states. Horror; excitement. Bad thing; good thing. Thing that had definitely happened; thing that might happen.
The skull could be there for a legitimate reason. It didn’t have to be sinister. It didn’t necessarily mean that someone had been murdered. Old burial ground. That could be real.
Josie took her phone out of her pocket and looked at it. But then she pushed it back in. Like Clem had said, this wasn’t exactly urgent. Human remains would trigger a serious, urgent response. She’d watched enough TV to know that much. It would probably be easier for them to come on Monday anyway.
‘That skull,’ she said. She hadn’t meant to say it.
‘I know.’
‘I’ve been – well, the village has this story about a girl who vanished. And I’m just wondering if …’
‘Tell me the story.’
‘I mean, it won’t be her, right? The watch wouldn’t have been hers. But she was friends with Clem’s mum, and she was – well, it’s a long story, but it involves an uncle I never met.’
‘Go on.’
It took about fifteen minutes to walk from the end of the drive at Cliff House to the centre of the village, and, by the time they got there, Josie had told Meg the whole story. She wanted Meg to say that the skull definitely couldn’t have anything to do with the missing girl, but of course she couldn’t say that.
The police would come on Sunday, and they’d find out.
By the time they reached Josie’s house, they were holding hands. Josie had tried it, and Meg hadn’t pulled away. Holding Megan’s hand made the world shine and glow and promise her things.
They turned into the cul-de-sac. She looked for Lucy, for Molly, but the house next door was quiet.
‘That’s Lucy’s house,’ she said.
‘Oh God, poor her!’
Josie remembered the way the bone had felt under her fingertips, the way her stomach had lurched when she’d realized what it was that she was digging up.
‘And this is us.’ She worked hard on not being embarrassed.
Meg grinned. ‘Cool.’ They looked at each other. Meg knew about Josie’s mum, knew that she didn’t handle visitors, so she said, ‘Shall we just sit here for a moment?’
It was starting to get dark. They sat on the doorstep. Josie filled her in on the story of the drone. ‘I have a feeling that Clem’s not as relaxed about it as she wants us to think.’
‘Oh God,’ said Meg, ‘I’ve known Clem forever. Yeah, she’ll have been offended for a bit, but by now she’ll have forgotten about it. Specially after everything that just happened in the garden.’ Their eyes met.
‘Right,’ said Josie, putting Clem out of her mind. ‘Sure. I guess that’s OK then.’
‘It is,’ said Meg. ‘It’s all going to be splann.’
Their little fingers touched. It was electric. It was everything Josie had ever wanted. It opened pathways inside her. New things flooded her.
She turned her face towards Meg. Could they kiss? They’d only met today, but they had no time. No time at all. She started to lean forward.
The door opened behind them.
‘Josie!’ Mum was standing there. ‘Oh, thank goodness. I didn’t know who was on our doorstep. What are you doing out there? Come in. Hello.’ This last bit was to Megan.
Meg stood up and smiled at her. Mum was wearing an actual dress, and Josie’s heart broke for her. She was trying so hard, because of Uncle Andy, because of Josie. Her hair was tied back. There were bags under her eyes, but her eyes themselves were engaged in a way Josie hadn’t seen for such a long time. She felt the surge of hope again in her chest and this time didn’t squash it down quite as far as before.
‘Hello,’ said Meg. ‘Nice to meet you. I’m Meg.’
‘Angie,’ Mum replied. ‘And please, girls – come in! You don’t need to sit out there.’
They looked at each other. Josie raised her eyebrows. Meg nodded.
Mum had clearly been up a ladder, cleaning cobwebs out of the corner of the ceiling. Once she’d said a few more polite things to Meg, she went back to it.
‘I’ve been looking at these for weeks,’ she said. ‘Never quite had the energy to get up here and do it.’
‘Where did you get the ladder?’ asked Josie.
‘Borrowed it from Lucy. I’m going to do all the corners before I give it back. I feel bad for the spiders, though. Look at me, bulldozing their homes.’
‘If you were looking at them,’ said Josie, ‘you should have said. I’d have done it.’
She felt a tiny bit affronted; she couldn’t help it. Mum was feeling better, and she was doing the housework properly. Not the way Josie did it. The whole place smelled of polish and cleaning spray and bleach.
‘You’re not killing them, though,’ said Meg. ‘And they’ll just run off and make new homes. That’s what they do. They’ll be fine.’
Mum nodded lots of times. She really was trying so hard. Josie had never known her willingly invite a stranger into the house.
‘Drink?’ she said to Megan. Remembering the array of concoctions Rik had produced from Clem’s kitchen, she clarified the options. ‘We have tea, instant coffee and water.’
‘Perfect,’ said Meg. ‘I’d love a cup of tea.’
They took their drinks into Josie’s room and closed the door. There were little bits of torn paper all over the floor, but Megan didn’t ask, and Josie decided she would tell her later.
They sat next to each other on the bed, and this time Josie didn’t second-guess herself. She and Meg leaned in for the kiss together. Their lips met, and kissing a girl was different. Meg’s lips were soft. Her mouth was small.
Josie’s hands were on Meg’s waist. Meg’s hands were under Josie’s T-shirt. They moved up. Josie gasped and leaned back. Meg pulled her own T-shirt over her head, and then Josie’s. She looked at the door.
‘It’s OK,’ whispered Josie. ‘She won’t come in. Don’t stop.’
She didn’t.