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SPECTRE HAD A LITTLE under twenty-four hours to make a decision, but deep down he knew there was no decision to be made. It had already been made for him and he was just going through the motions.
When he walked through Bear’s front door, Michelle was holding Cal Jr. and immediately read the look on Spectre’s face. Without a single detail, she knew what was about to happen. Spectre’s expression had said it all.
“They’re making you go,” she said softly as she walked up and hugged him.
Spectre kissed her and then kissed his son on the forehead. Cal Jr. smiled and laughed before trying to hand Spectre the stuffed airplane he had been holding.
“Thank you, buddy,” Spectre said, graciously accepting it.
“How did you know?” Spectre asked Michelle.
“You wouldn’t be here otherwise,” Michelle replied. “Unless they scrubbed the mission.”
“Those are the options, yes,” Spectre said. “Where’s Bear?”
“They’re out back,” Michelle said.
“Good. You and I should talk,” Spectre said as he took Cal Jr. from her and walked to the living area. While he was gone, Michelle had been staying with Bear and his wife to help with Cal Jr. so she could continue her private practice as a lawyer.
They sat down on the couch. “So, which is it? Are you done?” Michelle asked.
“I think so,” Spectre said. “I don’t think there’s any way to make it work at this point.”
“What happened?”
“There was a car accident when we were in Europe. One of the pilots hit his head. Turns out, he has an intracranial hemorrhage and they’re going to need to go in and relieve the pressure. He lost consciousness during a flight, but we should’ve found it earlier. That’s my fault.”
“How is it your fault?”
“I let Kruger and his team push him through the medical stuff instead of doing a full evaluation. He should never have gotten back in a jet until he had a full workup. They would’ve caught this much sooner. Jesus, he may never fly again.”
“Cal, you can’t blame yourself for that.”
“The pilots are my responsibility. And now one of them is in the hospital. Doesn’t matter anyway, Kruger told me the timeline moved up,” Spectre said.
“How soon?”
Spectre looked at his watch. “Three days from now we have to be operationally ready to go. There’s just no way, even if I could find someone to take his place.”
“Do they have a backup plan?”
“Yeah. Me.”
“And you don’t want to do it?”
“That wasn’t part of the deal,” Spectre said. “I signed on for training only. Nothing else.”
“So, that’s it? You’re home now. What are they going to do?”
Spectre shrugged. “Not my problem.”
Michelle frowned. “Cal, it is our problem. You know what the stakes are.”
“Haven’t we given enough?”
Michelle rubbed Spectre’s shoulder. “We have, but that doesn’t mean we can sit back now just because we’ve already given. You have a skillset that the country needs right now to avert a world war.”
Spectre shook his head. “There’s no way I can get myself or Woody ready for this in just a few days. We really needed months to prepare.”
“You planned an operation to go to Cuba to rescue a girl and recover an F-16 on a bar napkin, didn’t you?”
“We were only supposed to go to Cuba and gather intel, remember?” Spectre replied. “It just kind of fell apart from there.”
“And you improvised, right?”
“That was different,” Spectre replied. “The Cubans didn’t quite have the military we’re talking about here.”
Michelle kissed Spectre. “You know I’ll support any decision you make, but I think you should at least strongly consider it.”
Spectre sighed softly. “I know, but I was kind of hoping you’d tell me to stay home.”
“Why?”
“Because Kruger and Jenny are waiting for me at the airport right now anyway,” Spectre said, wincing as he waited for Michelle to react.
“So, you’re going?”
“I don’t think I have a choice. If I don’t, they’re going to send Woody in alone. And you know he can’t be trusted by himself,” Spectre said with a chuckle.
“So, why didn’t you just say that from the beginning?”
“Because I really was hoping you would say no. I told Kruger I needed to talk to you about it first and see my son before I made a decision. But we were on the same page, which is why I love you so much. If I don’t go, this whole mission falls apart and a lot of people will die. But I didn’t want to influence your decision. And if you had said no, I would’ve stayed home.”
“Please, be safe,” Michelle said as she kissed Spectre.
“I will,” Spectre said.
He hugged Cal Jr. and kissed him on the forehead before kissing Michelle again. “I’d better get back to the base. We have a lot of training to do in a short time.”
“Will I see you again before you go?” Michelle asked.
“I’ll try to Skype you guys,” Spectre said.
He kissed them both again a final time and then walked out the door as he choked back a tear. He hated saying goodbye, but this time was especially hard for him. Something was nagging at him.
Something deep within his gut told him to just enjoy the last few moments. That same voice was screaming at him to stay home and forget any of this had ever happened. He had said goodbye so many times before and always made it home safely. He had been through hell and back with Michelle, but this time was different.
He had never had this feeling before. As he turned and looked back at his wife and son a final time before walking out the door, he could feel the dread building inside him. He had to go through with this mission because it was his duty, but deep down he felt it was a one-way mission.
He felt like this was the last time he would ever see either of them. And although his inner voice was now screaming for him to stay home, he waved goodbye and walked out the door. It was time to go save his country.