‘MR DREW! I need to talk to you.’ Rosa took her courage in both hands when she met him alone out in the yard. ‘It’s about Delia.’
‘I don’t wish to discuss her.’ His manner was abrupt.
‘It can’t be easy for you.’ Rosa thought she would try placating him. ‘It’s been a shock to you. Not what you would expect from one of your daughters.’
His face was like thunder and he opened his mouth to bellow at her, but she quickly forestalled him. ‘I think there is a way out of the present difficulty.’
‘The only way out is for her to disappear off Sunk Island and out of my sight,’ he snapped. ‘I want nothing more to do with her.’
‘She’s carrying your grandchild,’ she implored. ‘She has done wrong, but that can’t be undone now, and none of us is without sin.’
His face, which had been scarlet with fury, drained of colour and he stared at her.
‘The child will be born out of wedlock, I know,’ she went on, ‘but her mother wouldn’t have turned her away.’
‘What? What did you say?’
She gazed back at him. ‘Her mother wouldn’t have turned her away,’ she repeated.
He licked his lips and took several shallow breaths and she thought that he was like a man drowning. ‘Are you ill?’ she asked. ‘Do you want to go inside and sit down?’
‘No,’ he gasped. ‘I just want all of this to go away. I need some peace.’
There’s something more than Delia bothering him, she thought. He’s shaking! ‘I’ve asked my gran to come and stay,’ she said firmly. ‘We’ve enough room and she knows about these things. I don’t,’ she added, ‘and you wouldn’t want a stranger coming here to deliver the child.’
‘No,’ he said. ‘I won’t have that.’ He stared defiantly at her. ‘I’ll not pay her for coming!’
‘She wouldn’t expect you to,’ she said coldly. ‘Just her keep, that’s all.’
He turned away. ‘Another mouth to feed,’ he muttered.
She couldn’t resist a barb. ‘You had a wife and five daughters to look after you before, Mr Drew. Now there’s only me, and Delia. Besides, my gran’s a good cook.’
He grunted, but said nothing more and she turned and went into the house, feeling satisfied. It would be so much easier with her grandmother there, she was a comforting, steady soul, and she wouldn’t put up with any tantrums from Delia.
‘You’re not a very good colour,’ was the first thing Mrs Jennings said to Delia on arrival. ‘You should be blooming! Are you eating? You’re eating for two, don’t forget.’
‘I wish I could forget,’ Delia muttered. ‘I wish I could just forget about it and it would go away.’
‘Well it won’t,’ Mrs Jennings said cheerfully. ‘You should have given more thought about it before. You can’t undo what’s done, so you must make ’best of it.’
She put the kettle on the fire. She seemed to have taken charge of the kitchen already. Turning to Delia she added softly, ‘You’ll feel different about it when you hold ’bairn in your arms, mark my words if you don’t.’
She ran her fingers over Delia’s cheekbones. Her face was thin and her skin had a greyish tinge to it. Mrs Jennings gave a slight nod of her head. ‘Best rest from now on,’ she said. ‘A walk every morning to get some fresh air and then a lie-down in ’afternoon. No lifting coals or wood.’
Tears came into Delia’s eyes at the kind words and she blinked them away. ‘I don’t feel well,’ she mumbled, ‘but I’m scared of what my da will say if I don’t pull my weight.’
‘You leave your da to me.’ Mrs Jennings patted her arm. ‘I’ll make sure he’s nowt to grumble about.’
To Rosa she expressed her fears. ‘That young woman doesn’t look good. I’m not happy about her. We’ll have ’doctor here to take another look at her.’
The doctor, when he came, pursed his lips. ‘Rest,’ he said to Delia. ‘I think it won’t be long before your confinement.’
Delia turned even paler. ‘I think I’m going to be sick,’ she whispered to Mrs Jennings after the doctor had left. ‘I’m that frightened.’
‘Nowt to be frightened about,’ Mrs Jennings said soothingly. ‘It’s happening to women all over ’world, every day, perfectly natural. Just think on all animals that just get on with it: hosses, cows, sheep, pigs.’
Delia gave her a look of disgust. ‘That doesn’t give me any comfort at all!’
‘Well, that’s ’way it is.’ Mrs Jennings was blunt, her patience rapidly disappearing. ‘So remember if ever you’re tempted again.’
‘I’ll not be tempted,’ Delia said bitterly. ‘I’m finished wi’ men for good.’
But she realized she would change her mind on the morning she took a gentle walk across the pastureland and met the red-haired Irishman again. He greeted her so politely and asked, with a charming lilt to his voice, how she was, and offered her his arm to escort her back home.
‘Miss Drew,’ he said quietly. ‘Forgive me – perhaps it’s Mrs?’
‘No,’ she mumbled. ‘It isn’t, I’m Delia – and I’m not wed.’
‘So!’ He gave her a smile. ‘A chance for some of us?’
She tossed her head. ‘I don’t think so.’
‘Can I ask you a question?’ His voice was soft, like velvet, she thought.
She shrugged. ‘If you want.’
‘You might slap my face!’
She didn’t answer, for he was gently stroking her arm with his fingers.
‘Are you unfortunate enough to be in the family way? Has some cowardly lover left you?’
She stared straight ahead. It showed, then. She had thought if she didn’t eat much and wore loose clothes that no-one would notice, but she had felt the eyes of Harry, the farm hand, on her the other day, and he had dropped his gaze when he saw her looking back at him.
‘Yes,’ she said. ‘I am. And he did.’
‘Did your father and brothers not go after him?’ he asked.
‘He’s left the area,’ she lied. ‘They couldn’t find him.’
‘But you’ve got the support of your family? Your father is taking care of you? You’re very lucky.’ He gave her a compassionate glance. ‘If you had been an Irish girl so afflicted, she would have been abandoned by her family and the baby sent to an orphanage.’
She shook her head, feeling that she could confide in him. ‘No. Da would have turned me out. He’s so righteous. He said I had sinned, which I know I did.’ Tears, which came so easily, flushed her eyes. ‘But Matthew and Jim persuaded him to let me stop.’ She didn’t mention Rosa or the effort she had made.
‘Ah,’ he said softly. ‘Of course. It must have been hard for your poor father, being a religious church-going man. So God-fearing! He would expect his sons and daughters to be as strong and virtuous as he so obviously is.’
She thought she detected a laugh in his voice, but when she turned to face him, he was straight-faced and solemn.
‘Someone will come along, Delia,’ he murmured. ‘Someone else will see your worth and charm.’ He smiled and looked into her eyes, then reached to kiss her cheek. She blushed and drew in her breath. ‘They will forgive that they are not the first to capture your maidenhood.’
She stood with lips parted. Was it true? Did some men not mind if a woman isn’t pure when they marry her?
‘I’d like to think that there’d be someone—’ she began.
They were close to the farmhouse, but he didn’t even give it a glance as he stepped nearer to her. ‘There’ll be someone, be sure of it,’ he murmured, and turning her face up towards him he kissed her on the lips. ‘Be sure of it, Delia.’
He stroked her cheek, then blowing her a kiss he moved away. ‘Go home now,’ he urged. ‘Take care of yourself and your baby.’
She smiled. She hadn’t felt so good in months. There was hope after all. She watched him as he walked away. He had such a spring in his step. He looked so lively. He turned and waved and she saw the smile on his face. He seemed very happy. Was it because of her?
Mrs Jennings had seen them from the window. She tried to warn her. ‘There’ll be some men will try to tek advantage,’ she said. ‘They’ll think cos you’ve fallen once, you’ll be willing. Don’t be tekken in,’ she advised. ‘They’ll sweet-talk you, but they won’t marry you, girl. They’ll not tek on another man’s child.’
Delia listened and nodded in agreement but as she went upstairs for her rest she smiled. What did that old woman know? When had she last felt the sweetness of a man’s lips on hers? She felt a restlessness inside her. She wanted to get on with life now that there was some hope, and the Irishman had given her that hope. Mrs Jennings might be wise, but she was quite wrong.
She lay on her bed and ran her fingers around her breasts, which were full and round, then smoothing them across her belly, she considered that she hadn’t felt any movement for some time. She sighed. She hoped now that it wouldn’t be long. Better to be over and done with and she could make a fresh start. A picture of the Irishman came into her head and she etched her fingers around her mouth where he had kissed her.
She played out a little scene where he and she and the baby left Sunk Island. Taking his arm, she turned her back on her family and especially on Rosa, and they rode away in a neat trap, like the one which Maggie had. I’ll show them all, she thought drowsily. I’ll teach them to look down on me. For that was what she felt. She had fallen from grace, not able to eat at her father’s table, nothing more than a lowly servant.
If Rosa hadn’t been here, Da would have been glad to have me back, even with the babby. If she hadn’t been here I might never have gone away in the first place, and none of this would have happened. And so she absolved her guilt and transferred it to someone else. To Rosa, whom she had never liked.
‘Is yon young woman expecting?’ Harry asked Rosa as he sat down at the table for his midday meal. The others hadn’t come in yet and Mrs Jennings had gone to the dairy to fetch some butter.
‘She is. But please don’t mention it in front of Mr Drew.’
‘Can’t disguise it, though.’ He took a sup of ale that she had poured for him. ‘Can’t hide summat like that.’ He gave a sniff. ‘And ’chap won’t marry her, I suppose, otherwise we’d have seen a wedding by now. I expect her da’ll be preaching in ’church about sins of ’flesh, being sort o’ man that he is. But she’ll not be ’first and she’ll not be ’last either. Why – I remember when I was a young chap—’
Rosa hushed him as she heard the sound of footsteps entering the house and Mr Drew was followed in by Matthew and Jim.
‘Dinner not on ’table?’ Mr Drew barked.
‘It’s ready,’ Rosa said. ‘I didn’t put it out as I know you like your rabbit pie straight from ’oven.’
‘Rabbit pie! Aye, it has to be hot – or else cold. Never just warm.’ He sat down in his chair as Mrs Jennings came in and took the pie out of the oven, and Rosa dished up the floury potatoes.
‘Carrots! Mrs Drew allus did carrots with rabbit,’ he muttered, but appeared mollified as, without a word, Mrs Jennings put in front of him a dish of carrots with a knob of melting yellow butter on top.
‘Tha’s allus had a good hand at pastry, Mrs Jennings,’ Harry said appreciatively as he ate. ‘I remember it well when I used to work for Mr Jennings. We allus knew where we would get good grub and where we wouldn’t, and yours was allus one of ’best places.’
‘Ah well,’ said Mrs Jennings. ‘Feed a man well and he won’t stray far.’
‘Aye,’ he cackled. ‘Or at least he’ll allus be home in time for his dinner.’
Mr Drew glared at him. A red spot burned on each side of his face. ‘Let’s have less talk, we’ve work to do this afternoon.’
‘Where’s ’other young lass?’ Harry ignored the admonishment. ‘She never eats with us at dinner time. I hope she’s feeding herself up. Babby’ll tek her strength if she doesn’t.’
There was a momentary silence and Rosa tried to catch his gaze that she might implore him to be silent, but he ate and gossiped garrulously about somebody’s pregnant daughter who didn’t eat, and the baby took her nourishment until she was as thin as a skeleton.
‘That’s enough,’ Matthew began, but Mrs Jennings butted in. ‘You’re talking rubbish, Harry Miller. Now, no more of this for you know nowt about it. If you must know, Delia has eaten her dinner already and is resting upstairs. More pie, Mr Drew?’
‘Well, now it’s out,’ Rosa said to her grandmother as they washed the dishes and dried them. ‘Now that Harry knows, everyone else on Sunk Island will hear about it before the week’s out. He’s a proper old woman for gossip.’
‘So we can stop pretending, can’t we?’ Mrs Jennings said. ‘It should have been told afore and it would have been over and done with. I’ll go into Patrington tomorrow and buy a few things that she’ll need – and some knitting wool for a start.’
‘And the day after I shall go to Hedon and visit Maggie,’ Rosa determined. ‘I haven’t had time to go and see her, I’ve always been so busy.’ She reached across and kissed her gran on the cheek. ‘I’m so glad that you’re here,’ she said. ‘I know everything will be all right now.’
Maggie was a picture of health. Her skin was clear and her extra plumpness suited her. She was seated on a sofa with her feet up when Rosa arrived and she greeted her warmly. She showed her the baby clothes that she had knitted and the linen she had stitched for the crib, then eventually she asked about her sister.
‘How is Delia? Is she well?’
‘Not so well as you, Maggie, and your father still won’t speak to her. It’s as if he’s pretending that she isn’t there.’
‘Poor girl!’ Maggie commiserated. ‘I’m so sorry. I was angry with her to begin with, but she won’t have much of a life if she and her babby are to be hidden away.’
‘It’s much easier now that my gran has come,’ Rosa said. ‘She’s so sensible. She’s making Delia rest every day now, but,’ she added, ‘she doesn’t look as you do. Her skin is grey and sometimes she’s sick. Gran thinks that ’babby will come soon.’
‘She’s earlier than me then?’ Maggie pondered. ‘And I thought we were ’same time. I’ve a month to go.’ She gave a happy smile. ‘I just can’t wait and neither can Fred.’
A few days later Delia started to be sick. She retched morning, noon and night and complained of pain in her back. ‘Ride for ’doctor, will you, Jim,’ Mrs Jennings said late on the third afternoon. ‘Summat’s not right.’
Mr Drew heard Delia crying and wailing and pacing the floor up in her room as he was downstairs in the parlour trying to read his paper before supper. ‘Tell her to mek less noise,’ he bellowed to Mrs Jennings. ‘Tell her it’s her just punishment for ’sin she’s committed and she must bear it quietly.’
‘And what of ’fellow who put her in this state?’ Mrs Jennings answered sharply. ‘It teks two to mek a bairn. He’s not suffering, is he? Men tek their pleasure and don’t suffer consequences.’
He threw down his paper, got up from his chair and marched towards the kitchen door. He turned. ‘Men have bodily needs that are stronger than women’s,’ he cried in a tight hoarse voice. ‘Women must have ’strength and courage to resist them, not indulge them in their depraved sins. They must show them ’error of their wicked desires, not pander to them.’
He banged the door behind him and Mrs Jennings stared after him. ‘Well, well, well,’ she exclaimed.
Jim was about to mount his horse to ride to Patrington when his father stormed out of the house and into the stable, bringing out his mare. ‘I’m going for ’doctor, Da. There’s no need for you to go.’
His father mounted. ‘I’m not going for ’doctor,’ he bellowed. ‘I’m going out, away from that Hades racket.’
‘But where are you going? It’s late!’
His father wheeled his mount around and headed for the gate. ‘Never you mind. I’ll be back in ’morning.’
It was a long dark ride and when he reached the town of Hull, instead of booking a room in the inn, he rode on to Leadenhall Square and tied his horse up outside the house. He rang the doorbell and a young woman he hadn’t seen before answered it. He was very dishevelled after the ride and she half closed the door.
‘Tell Miss Emerald it’s Mr Brown,’ he barked at her.
She smiled and opened the door. ‘You’d better come in, Mr Brown. You’ve had a long journey by ’look of it.’
‘Aye. I need a bath.’
‘I’ll see to it,’ she said soothingly. ‘It will help to relax you.’
Miss Emerald appeared a few moments later. ‘How good to see you, Mr Brown. We thought you had forsaken us!’
‘No.’ He felt exhausted. ‘Just busy.’
‘And now you need to unwind?’
‘Aye, I do, but I have to be off early in ’morning.’
‘I understand.’ Her voice was soft and pleasant. ‘Just a brief visit this time?’
He was bathed and towelled and dressed in a robe and taken to a room, dimly lit and heavily swathed with hangings which smelled of exotic perfume making him feel quite dizzy. The women who were sent in to him were in turn vivacious, tender, rampant or provocative. They whispered promises of so many delights, but they all failed to rouse him to sensual pleasure or gratification.
Each fair face and comely body which lay beside him on the crisp perfumed sheets shifted and transposed into the sad face and swollen body of his youngest daughter. The daughter who had fallen to the desires of a man as these women had fallen.
‘I’m a sinner,’ he moaned, as they ran their sensuous fingers over his collapsed and drooping impotence.
‘Of course you are,’ they murmured. ‘We all are. That is why you are here, so we can enjoy sinning together.’
One sat astride him and lowered herself so that her breasts were brushing his face and her nipples close to his mouth. He turned his head away. No. No, he groaned inwardly. She’s with child! But he opened his mouth and sucked and sucked until the girl cried out that he was hurting. But still his body was flaccid and useless.
He blamed them, the women. ‘I’ll not pay in full,’ he told Miss Emerald as he prepared to leave. ‘They’re not as good as they used to be.’
‘Perhaps you are a little tired?’ she suggested, but her eyes were cold. ‘They are my best girls.’
He grunted and gave her only half of what she asked for and as she closed the door behind him, she slipped the money into the folds of her dress and called to a man sitting in another room, ‘Cross Mr Country Brown off our list. He’ll not be coming back.’