I’m Tosca Reno, the mom of four who went from fat and frumpy to slender, healthy, and sexy—all after age forty. You may know me as the author of the Eat-Clean Diet franchise, the New York Times bestselling author of Your Best Body Now, or the creator of the diet lauded by celebrities such as Angelina Jolie, Nicole Kidman, and Halle Berry for helping them shed their post-baby weight. You may recognize me from Good Morning America, CBS Sunday Morning, Access Hollywood, or one of the hundreds of other media and personal appearances I make as I travel around the United States and Canada inspiring people to lose weight, get fit, and become healthier.
If you’re reading this book, then you probably already know a little bit about me. But with all the time that I’ve spent on the road, I am just beginning to find out about you.
I always assumed that the people who bought my books were those who mirror the person I am today—totally committed to a healthful lifestyle and the changes necessary to achieve it. But what I’m learning is that the majority of my books are purchased by people who are more like who I was when I began my journey.
I didn’t always look the way I do now. For years, I was a fragile pawn in my own yo-yo dieting nightmare, in which I spent the majority of my life starving myself, bingeing, and trying every diet known to mankind to lose weight and fit into my pre-kid jeans, all to no avail. I was seventy-five pounds heavier than I am now, then I got a little thinner, then got fat again. Up and down went the scale. I stayed in this limbo for more than twenty years before finally figuring out that I had the power to not only lose weight but keep it off and get healthy.
But like most stories that seem to fit into neat nutshells, the version that I have told up until now only touched the surface of my experience. Indeed, the life I have described in my other books is a somewhat sanitized version of what really happened to me; what I’ve shared before only hints at the real struggle I went through and that millions of people—perhaps including you—still endure. And for reasons that will soon become clear, it is only now that I have the courage and power to dig deep and be fully honest about what had to change inside of me before I could truly transform my life. I hope that sharing my experience and my journey to a healthy weight will inspire you to travel the same road—the road to happiness with the way you look and feel—because to be truly successful in reshaping yourself is to find the why first. Why are you not at your ideal weight? That answer is paramount.
It’s not that I have some shocking, tabloid tell-all to reveal. My story is epically relatable. Nearly 130 million people in the United States alone live just like I did: terrified of making changes, without the know-how to stop their self-sabotaging behaviors.
I am not only a former fat girl, a woman who stayed up late to avoid being caught eating ice cream and peanut butter and hunks of cheese. I am also a woman who was tangled up in a bad relationship and so many folds of fat that I no longer knew who I was. I had lost a sense of where I ended and others began. Sound familiar? I was a member of what I fondly call the “invisible millions.” I couldn’t see myself clearly; I felt lost and humiliated; I was hiding from myself.
Most stories that have at their heart the loss of our true selves have one of two endings: we either find ourselves or we continue to muddle through our lives—sad, powerless, and often very, very overweight and very, very sick.
I found myself. But not without wrestling with what was at the center of my fear of change. At first, I had no power to stop eating certain foods that were sabotaging my life and my health. I was so fearful of adjusting even the slightest thing in my day that instead I stayed immobile—stuck physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Then slowly I gained clarity and courage. I began to feel less threatened by small changes. I began to listen to another voice within me.
If you, too, belong to the “invisible millions,” if you, too, can’t seem to move off the couch—literally and metaphorically—I hope that my full story and the Start Here process for change will finally inspire in you the confidence and courage to change your life forever. I hope it is the spark for your personal renovation. If I can do it—you can do it.
The Start Here Diet is a simple three-step process. It’s gentle and easy and brought me out of my dark, lonely, and heavy place, the place where you must begin, too.
Part 1, “Coming Out of Hiding,” turns your focus inward. Many diets begin by asking you to identify your goals, such as the number of pounds you want to lose. My strategy is a bit different: I want you to focus on what’s behind your weight gain and behind your desire to lose weight. No diet will ever be successful if you don’t go to that place inside you, a place usually wrapped in pain, discomfort, shame, self-defeating habits, and fear. Unless you take care of this inner place, this inner fat person who is hiding from the world and herself or himself, then no matter what the diet, it will not work in the long run.
And I am all about the long run. I am all about showing you how you can—and will—heal that inner place, that part of you where your gifts and secret strengths reside.
As a former overweight person, I know what the prison of extra pounds does to the heart and the soul, never mind the body. And I know that for you to emancipate yourself from the prison of too much weight, to get in touch with the real you and the gifts that lie within you, you must face the intense fear and discomfort that surround you and that are presently dictating your life though you may be unaware of this vise-grip.
Step 1 will help you do this. I call this step your dive inward. I will describe my own dive inward and then ask you to get in touch with your heart, ask yourself some tough questions, and find some ways to forgive yourself, give yourself permission to move on, and begin to dismantle the pain that keeps you in your prison.
This first, heart-focused step is not complicated, but some of the questions you will ask yourself, and the changes they lead you to, probably won’t be easy. However, they are absolutely necessary and build a foundation from which you can take the subsequent two steps. Diving inward is the foundation for the beginning of your permanent weight loss. It is the step that will put you on the path to losing the ten, twenty, fifty, one hundred, or two hundred pounds that have you locked up, unwell, and miserable. Diving inward is where I started my process.
Part 2, “Losing Weight and Regaining Yourself,” lays out the details of the next two simple steps—sometimes I even call them “baby steps.” Removing your hidden food (step 2) and moving a little (step 3) are rooted in gentleness and simplicity. I know neither of these steps asks you to do anything you can’t do.
Identifying your hidden foods is much simpler than it may sound. We all have foods in our kitchens that too often find their way to our plates. We know they are less healthy than they could be, and if you’re honest with yourself, you know that these foods (or just one ingredient) are the ones you reach to for comfort. For me it was peanut butter (which isn’t inherently “bad” unless, like me, you are eating it late at night and straight out of the jar with a spoon) and ice cream. I reached for these foods when I was alone—I reached for them to give me pleasure, the pleasure and confidence I was missing in the rest of my day. Your hidden food(s) weigh you down physically and emotionally; clearly seeing the frequency with which they turn up in your diet and beginning to replace them with healthier options is a simple yet amazingly effective baby step toward huge weight loss. I will also introduce you to my kitchen shortcuts, which will help you rethink the way you shop, allow you to put together a meal or snack, and offer tools so that you are ready to deal with obstacles, troubleshoot roadblocks, and reach for and find support where and when you need it. The kitchen, too, is a good place to start your own process.
Don’t be intimidated by “moving a little” either! I appreciate that you are busy with your work or with your home or with your kids or with all three. I appreciate that most people don’t have any “extra” time they can devote to exercise. But I do know that you can add small movements to your housework or when sitting at your desk, and those small extra movements are exercise. In this step, I ask only that you add small movements to what you are already doing. I offer fifty movements that count as exercise, fifty movements from which you can find a handful that will become part of your daily routine. Moving more is a painless and ultimately joyful way to start your weight loss journey.
Part 3, “Renovating Day by Day,” offers you twenty-eight days of meals as well as twenty-eight days of activities that require as little as fifteen minutes a day. The eating and activity plans are meant to be flexible, so that you can either follow them as a literal guide or use them as inspiration to create your own food and exercise combinations.
Part 3 also includes an entire chapter that helps you develop support tools so that no obstacle will sabotage your plans and goals. The book ends with thirty easy and absolutely delicious recipes that you can make at home. They apply to you, the busy woman who is probably not a chef, just like me!
A big part of succeeding at this diet is keeping close track of your physical and emotional progress, and to do that I’m going to ask you to practice journaling.
The inner part of your journey needs a safe place in which to unfold. So it’s really important that you keep a journal—a place where you can put down your feelings, fears, words of encouragement; a record of all you experience as you begin this process of uncovering your gifts and your secret strengths. This is the beginning of you telling your own story.
And because I think this piece is so integral to your process and your success, I am going to share with you selections from my own journal. I think it will be valuable for you to see that I was a lot like you not so long ago. I hope you find encouragement, support, and solace in that knowledge. Not only will you see how uncomfortable I felt, but you will also see how, day by day, and with small steps, the changes I wished for myself became real.
Your journal is not simply a log where you record the foods you eat every day, though that is part of it. The journal is the place where you ask yourself questions about why you are hiding, begin to look at the inner part of you where your gifts reside, and start to understand your relationship with food. This journal becomes your story.
This journal can be a spiral-bound notebook with lined pages, a Google doc on your computer, a Notes page on your smartphone, or even a blank book in which you draw as well as write. You can even keep an audio journal by using a video or tape recorder to house your story. Your journal can take many shapes or forms; what’s most important is that you create it and use it.
Your journey through this diet might get intense at times. Yes, it’s simple; I’ve made the steps as uncomplicated as possible. But I know that taking these steps and making the changes can be hard! Even thinking about making changes can cause anxiety and make your heart race. Keeping a journal is one way to help manage this experience. Keep it close, by your bed or near your favorite chair. Think of your journal as a place to empty your worries and rediscover the real you, the one who’s been in hiding. It’s the place where you can reconnect with a part of yourself that may have been buried for a long time.
Throughout the chapters that lie ahead, from time to time I will remind you to turn to your journal. Having that safe, private place to dive into your heart and bare your soul is wonderfully liberating. I still keep a journal today! Remember, if you don’t write it down your desires never become reality.
This is a book for all of you who feel so profoundly stuck on the couch that you can no longer even imagine moving your body. This is a book for all of you who feel trapped by your bodies and who refuse to look in the mirror. Perhaps you’ve lost the sense of your body’s shape and size. Maybe you have always struggled with your weight, or maybe it was the act of quitting smoking or the birth of your children that left you with extra pounds you haven’t been able to lose. Regardless of the trigger or original cause, I believe that diving inward, discovering your hidden foods, and moving just a little is the right plan to kick-start you into a new way of life and into caring for yourself and your body again.
So come join me. I will show you how to trust yourself again, forgive yourself, and imagine changes you thought were beyond your reach. You will see how I and others like me began by taking baby steps to change our lives. And then you will be more ready than ever before to take the three gentle, easy baby steps that will lead you to permanent weight loss and tremendous health. Let the journey begin!