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After John finished mowing his lawn, he cleaned up the trash surrounding his yard and emptied his ashtrays. He went inside and did some laundry. He came across a piece of paper in his coat pocket that had the listings of AA meetings in his area. John wanted to be serious about quitting alcohol and found a meeting that would occur that evening at seven at the local parish, which was about a half mile walk from his house. After John finished cleaning up his house and laundry, it was time for him to head out for the meeting.
It was cool that night, but John felt it was refreshing for his nerves. He had never been to anything like this and could only relate to how movies portrayed it: tons of people going up to the stage and telling their sad stories. John did not want to be talking in front of a group of strangers, so his plan was to sit in the back and listen.
As John approached the front door, he nodded at a man and a woman smoking cigarettes when he felt the hair on his back began to rise. He had this feeling before but only in the nightmares that he had while he was in the hospital. He felt a strong thirst to have a shot before this meeting. He shook it off and opened the door.
John walked in and saw a man setting up the chairs. This main looked to be in his sixties, white hair, a little overweight, weary eye, and a kind smile through his thick beard.
“Hey, do you mind grabbing a couple of chairs?” the man asked.
“Not at all, sir,” John politely said.
“What brings you in today? Was it your own choice or did the courts force you to?” the man asked.
“My choice, sir,” John said.
“A lot of people who have started here came from the courts. It is nice to see a newcomer who made the hard choice to help himself. My name is Dave, and I am an alcoholic,” Dave said jokingly.
“Nice to meet you, Dave. My name is John,” John said smiling.
“One thing I like to tell the newcomers is that you do not have to talk and tell us your story. You can sit and listen if you would like. Our goal is to have everyone comfortable during these uncomfortable times of battling this disease. You will be assigned a sponsor to help you in the times you need the most help. Do not worry; the sponsors will not follow you around everywhere you go. I like to think of them as your conscience. You can call them if you have an urge and vice versa. No one can do this alone, so consider us your team. Welcome, John,” Dave said.
As others came in, Dave found a chair in the back. The room was a little more than half full of everyone having the same goal of getting sober. The meeting began with the reading of the twelve steps and some prayers. A few people spoke of their experiences with alcohol. Some people laughed and some shed tears. During the meeting, a man sat across from John kept staring at him. John felt a little uncomfortable and noticed this man looked determined. John could see his tired eyes over years of challenging work. John hoped he was not going to be assigned this guy as a sponsor.
As the meeting was ending, Dave announced the newcomers. There were three newcomers that evening and John was one of them. Each person in the room would stand up and introduce themselves following with their announcement of being an alcoholic. Dave had the newcomers stand up and announce their alcoholism as well, which John was a bit uncomfortable doing. After everyone announced they were an alcoholic, Dave assigned the sponsors and luck was not on John’s side. He was assigned to the man staring at him during the meeting as his sponsor.
After the meeting ended and people helped clean up, John approached his newly assigned sponsor. John could see this man looked tough.
“So, you are my sponsor? As you know, I am John,” John said.
“I will need your schedule throughout the day, so I know where you are at all times,” the man said as a smile creeped up from the corner of his mouth. John was relieved there was some humor in him after all.
“My name is Mike and welcome to AA. Can I buy you a coffee?” Mike asked.
“Coffee sounds better than giving you my schedule,” John said laughing.
The two men went to a restaurant down the street. Mike talked about his 20 years sober and about his job as a construction worker. John talked about his years on the police force and a little bit about his growing up. John liked this guy, but if he thinks John is going to be carried through this by a man he hardly knows, he has another thing coming. John felt he would be fine on his own.
“So, tell me, John, what made you decide to quit?” Mike asked.
“I was sick of getting dealt too many bad hands and wanted a change,” John said.
“I get that. Do not fuck it up, John. People cannot fight this battle alone. One day you will understand,” Mike said.
John and Mike exchanged phone numbers and parted ways. Mike jumped into his gray Toyota Tundra and John walked home. John was not going to burden this man just like he burdened Nancy. He was confident he could fight this battle on his own. If he just attended the AA meetings, he would be fine.