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Hudson
“Maybe you should have become a florist,” Kate laughs.
“Why’s that?”
“Every name you’ve suggested is a flower.”
She has a point. But I’m not admitting to it.
“Not William.”
She runs her hand up my chest and brings her hand to the side of my face. Arching her neck up, she kisses my cheek. “Since we knew the gender, dork.”
“Fine. But I don’t see what’s wrong with Daisy. It’s cute.”
“For a dog.”
“For a girl!”
“What about Jenna?”
“Too ordinary.”
“Jenna’s not ordinary!”
“Yeah, but they’d call her Jenn,” I insist, only because I love giving Kate a hard time. In reality, I’d get used to and be okay with any name that made her happy.
“You’re impossible. We can call her Daisy for now, but the jury’s out.”
Now, it’s my turn to kiss her. It’s days like these where we spend full afternoons in bed that I dread returning home to Mary the most. Never, even in the beginnings of our marriage, did we eat pizza in bed and waste entire days drifting off between naps and reruns. In under a year, I’d shared more laughs, tears, and even secrets with Kate than I ever had with my wife. Mary, who even flipped out the time I was deathly sick and ate crackers in bed, would pace if the bed wasn’t made by 7 a.m. with military corners. It is Kate’s playfulness and disinterest in rules that made her and even her place feel like home.
***
Hours later
“YOU WERE RIGHT ABOUT what you said.”
“Oh?” I look at Mary wondering what she’s up to. Never once, in the last decade anyway, has she admitted I was right.
“We need a refresher. Something new. A way to start over again.”
I gulp. I pray she doesn’t want another vacation. Kate would flip. I pick at my meatloaf, wondering why its color is off and praying my wife hasn’t lost it again. “What do you have in mind?” I ask, only to keep the peace.
“I made some calls today.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Four weeks.”
My heart flips hard and clumsily in my chest. “Okay, when’s that? What’s happening?”
Mary smiles at me and pushes her wire-rimmed glasses up the throat of her nose. “Til we renew our vows. Of course, if you want, we can do it sooner than that, but wedding planning takes time.”
“Wait. What? You want to renew our vows? Do you know how busy I am at work right now?”
“Oh, don’t worry about it, hon. I’ve got it all taken care of. I even sent an email to Brown. I’m sure he’ll be over the moon. You know how he worries about us. I figure we can do it in the corporate lounge. I can let Barbara know too. Nothing too fancy, of course. But it’s something we always talked about and just never got around to.”
I wipe the sweat from my brow, wondering how the hell I’m going to stop her. Brown will put it in the corporate newsletter. He’ll make it a huge thing. Kate will find out...
“Are you feeling okay?”
Mary moves her hand to her mouth, covering her lips and angling her head down. “Yes. I was happy. I thought you’d love this idea. I’m sorry it took me so long to come around. I figured you’d be okay with it. Hell, babe, I even threw my pills out. I’m ready now.”
I wince. Mary cannot get pregnant. Christ, I haven’t touched her since Kate except that one time. I’ve promised Kate that won’t start now and the hell I’m going to jeopardize the baby. ...Tell her. Tell her now. End this. Everything in me wants to spit the words out. Instead, I spit out a bite of meatloaf, wondering where the hell Milo is. Stupid, useless dog.
“What’s wrong? Is it too pink?”
“No. I’m just not feeling well. And yes, that will be great. Let me know what Brown says and how I can help out.” I hate myself. Kate will hate me more. But with no time to think and the scent of my girlfriend all over me, I can’t figure a faster way out. Somehow, I’m going to have to break it to my pregnant girlfriend that my psychotic wife and me are about to renew our vows. And the whole pill part? Get the fuck out.
Tell her. Tell her now.