For the first time since Stuart’s collapse the Milton brothers enjoyed a night out together. Dave was encouraged by the positive effect that the revelations regarding Lauren’s death seemed to have had on his brother’s outlook. Many of the conflicts between Stuart’s perception of his life and the reality of it were still there but he was far more receptive to the explanations given to him. He was particularly touched by the profuse apology offered by his brother for the way he had treated him over the past weeks. Outwardly, Dave dismissed this as completely understandable under the circumstances but secretly he was relieved and felt a burden of guilt lift from him.
Whilst the news of Lauren’s death had helped Dave understand Stuart’s psychological condition, it did not explain the changes in his physical appearance. In particular, the missing tattoo he had received with the rest of the group in Amsterdam and his lean appearance. The latter had been explained away as a result of Stuart being in a coma for two weeks, though Dave was almost certain he had noticed this prior to his collapse. The former was about to be revealed to all amongst great hilarity.
On Dr Carson’s advice, Dave organised a gathering of friends to join them at the pub where they drank regularly. She wanted to know how he would react in a social environment. Stuart recognised all but one of the people his brother invited. The doctor was pleased to see he was comfortable accepting that the memories he had of his friend’s lives were not always consistent with what he learned from them directly. He even joked about the differences between his recollections of their jobs compared to their actual jobs. To the amusement of the ensemble, he went around the group pointing to each person as he summarised their positions. There was Pete the fireman who was actually an electrician, Bob the gym instructor who was an accountant, Graham the school teacher who was a prison officer, Adam the stay at home dad who was a British Telecom Engineer, Chunky the Zoo keeper, who Stuart said he had never met before and finally Lynn the librarian who was, a librarian! When Adam expressed disbelief that anyone could forget a character like Chunky the subject of the tattoo came up. The very mention of this sent the big man into fits of laughter as he explained what had actually happened that night.
“It’s convenient you don’t remember me yer shamming git,” he barked at Stuart, “the tattoos were your idea not mine. I carried it off because it was more convincing coming from me!”
“What you on about now yer nutter?” Adam shouted at Chunky.
“Me and Stuart never had them did we? It was a wind-up! Stuart here came up with the idea pre-empting what he expected you lot to do to him. “Bollocks, I might have been pissed but I saw you get them done.” Adam replied. Chunky undid the buttons of his shirt, pulling it down over his broad shoulders revealing bare arms. “What we had done were just temporary tattoos yer mugs. They lasted about two weeks.” With this he fell about laughing again.
“You absolute shits the pair of you.” Dave chirped in. I can’t believe I’ve never noticed before. “The amount of times we’ve mentioned them since and you’ve never said a word!”
Stuart held out his hands and shrugged his shoulders in a gesture of ignorance. “Hey, just because you can’t remember it doesn’t mean you’re innocent,” Adam rounded on Stuart. “I think you’ll find it does mate, isn’t that right, doc? Can’t I plead insanity?”
Dr Carson had tried to stay in the background for the most part but Stuart had insisted she join in with the frivolity. She enjoyed watching him interacting with other people in a relaxed environment. She observed him as a person, not as a patient. He was an attractive guy, funny, charming and kind. Exactly the type of guy she would usually be drawn to. Her previous partner of eight years was not that different from Stuart in looks and personality. They had gotten to know each other at college when they were both studying medicine. There had been no romantic relationship at first but they became close friends. They went their separate ways after medical school, her to study psychiatry, him to carry out general surgical training. Two years later they met again when she took a residency position at a hospital where he was carrying out specialist training in cardiothoracic surgery. This time their friendship quickly blossomed into romantic relationship and within the first year of her taking the position they moved in together. The nature of their work meant the time they got to spend with each other was sporadic at best. This worked for the first few years but as time went on they became more distant and made less effort to see each other. Eventually he finished his specialist training and was offered a consultancy in the north of England. He asked her to join him but she did not feel there was enough to their relationship by that stage to warrant her giving up a position she enjoyed. They kept in touch for a while but they never made the effort to see each other. Eventually the contact fizzled away to nothing. Since then she engaged in a couple a casual flings but nothing had developed further.
Stuart noticed Dr Carson looking at him, or was she looking through him? Her mind seemed elsewhere. A bell rang through the bar announcing the call for last orders. He saw her jump slightly as if drawn back from wherever her mind had wandered. He gestured to her signalling the offer of another drink. She looked at her almost empty glass of white wine and raised it accepting his offer. Apart from Dave all the others decided this was a cue to leave and said their goodbyes. Stuart bought drinks for the three of them remaining while Dave and the doctor found a table. The conversation was a little stunted at first but they all agreed the night had been a great success.
She rubbed the back of her neck feeling awkward at the forced conversation. “So, what was life like for the Milton brothers growing up together?” She asked this purely as an ice-breaker with no professional angle intended, but the ensuing discussion offered her further insight into the depth of Stuart’s psychological trauma. Some of the memories the brothers shared were consistent, but others did not align at all. The most significant contradiction being the events around the time of their mother’s death. According to Stuart’s recollection their mother died shortly after he graduated from university. According to Dave, Stuart travelled around Asia having dropped out of university and was away when their mother died. Dr Carson watched for Stuart’s reaction to this conflicting information. “Really?” he asked. I didn’t graduate? Shit, I’d better change my CV.”
Hearing him make light of this came as a relief. She was optimistic he was accepting the diagnosis offered for his condition. The problem was she did not fully accept it herself. Some of the conflicting memories between the brothers preceded Stuarts encounter with Lauren at the party. It was unusual for disassociation disorder to affect memories obtained before the causal trauma had occurred. Her train of thought was broken by the barman approaching their table. He advised them the bar was due to close but a number of people had asked if they could have more drinks. If they wanted to stay as well there would be enough people to warrant keeping the bar open for longer. “Well, we can’t let the others down can we?” Stuart offered to the group. “I’m game for a lock in,” Dr Carson offered. She did not want to be on her own with the feelings of doubt that she was having. Besides, she was enjoying the drink and the company.
Dave decided he had had enough, so despite their protests he drained his glass, thanked them for their company and bid them goodnight.
With just the two of them remaining Dr Carson insisted the next drink was on her and duly headed to the bar leaving Stuart on his own. He watched her walk away, admiring her tall, sleek frame. He smiled as he noticed her stagger slightly as she approached the bar. As he waited for her return with the drinks a thought occurred to him. There was an imbalance that needing to be addressed and now was the time to address it. “I think this should probably be my last drink, Stuart,” the doctor said as she placed the drinks on the table. He refrained from mentioning he had noticed her stagger on the way to the bar, choosing to play down her concerns instead.
“Nah, make the most of it now you’re out. I’m sure you don’t get many opportunities to let your hair down, do you Doc?”
“That’s actually very true Stuart,” she agreed, “and please, I think you can drop the title now. Call me Catherine.”
This presented the perfect opportunity for Stuart to air his thoughts. He told her that while she had been at the bar it occurred to him she knew everything about his life but he knew very little about hers. He asked her where she had grown up. Did she have any siblings? What were her teenage years like? Was she in a serious relationship with anyone? What kind of music did she like? At first she was hesitant to open up to him, but the way he responded to the information she shared made her want to tell him more. He was a good listener and she enjoyed having someone showing interest in her life for once. Two hours and three drinks later Stuart learned Dr Catherine Carson had grown up in Sussex as an only child. She had excelled at school, particularly in the sciences, which set her up to follow her mother’s footsteps into medicine. Despite her studious teenage years, she had managed to travel considerably between school terms and had her first encounter with the opposite sex during a trip to the South of France. She was fifteen years old and had fallen head over heels in love with an American she met on a camp site. Unfortunately, after just a few days of being led to believe she was the only one for him, it became apparent hers was just one of a number of tents he had been sneaking into at night. After that she had decided boys were just a distraction from what really mattered and had chosen to immerse herself in her studies. She told him about the long-term relationship she had had with the surgeon and how her work had managed to get in the way of that being a success. “And that pretty much sums up my life to date, Stuart,” she concluded.
Stuart could not hold back from saying what came out next. Even though it sounded cheesy, and was no doubt fuelled by alcohol, it was a genuine sentiment. “I’ve got to say Catherine, I find it sad to think such a beautiful, intelligent, compassionate woman as yourself doesn’t have someone in her life to love and cherish her.”
“That’s a lovely thing to say Stuart but you don’t need to feel sorry for me. It’s ninety percent choice and ten percent lack of opportunity. By the way…”
She was not able to finish her sentence as he leaned over the table and kissed her on the lips softly. To her own surprise she did not pull away. The kiss lingered for a few seconds before he sat back into his seat. They stared at each other in silence for a few moments. Stuart apologised for taking her by surprise but added that it just seemed like the right thing to do.
“Country and R&B… by the way,” she offered sounding somewhat stunned.
The barman approached the table to inform them he was closing now and they should finish their drinks. They did this and wished him goodnight before heading out into the cool night air. Dr Carson shivered and folded her arms tight into her body. Stuart’s heart was pounding but it didn’t stop him from pulling her to him and asking her if he could try that kiss again. She told him she would like that very much. He put his lips to hers with the same gentleness as previously but this time the kiss lingered, gradually becoming more passionate. They pressed into each other enjoying the taste and warmth of each other’s mouths and the close contact of their bodies. The embrace lasted for several minutes before Stuart pulled back. “What now Doc?”
“Stop that Mr Milton, you sound like a cartoon rabbit,” she said, smacking the side of his shoulder lightly. “But in all seriousness, I think we should go home. To our respective homes. I’ve had a wonderful night, especially the latter part, but I think we should cool off and see how things look when the drink wears off!”
“I couldn’t disagree more Catherine. But seeing as you are much wiser than me I’ll respect your judgement. As long as I can have one more of those amazing kisses.” She leaned forward and kissed him briefly on the lips. She linked her arm with his and led him over to the taxi rank on the high street. “I’m taking a couple of weeks off work starting tomorrow Stuart. That was one of the reasons I wanted to see how you got on tonight.”
“And how have I got on Doc…, sorry Catherine?” He smiled coyly.
She looked up into his eyes. “Very well actually Mr Milton. But seriously, if you need anything at all while I’m off just call.”
“Anything, Catherine?” This time she pulled him into her embrace. “We’ll have to see what I can do. But as a friend Stuart, not as your doctor. I think that is a line we have crossed now.”
They had one final kiss before saying goodnight and taking separate taxis.