Violet propped her elbows on her sister’s granite-topped kitchen island, buried her face in her hands, and groaned. “I can’t believe it happened again.”
“It isn’t that bad,” Lily said, obnoxiously cheerful over morning coffee. “Y’all didn’t even have to get a mug shot.”
Violet dropped one hand to give her a baleful glare.
“Oh, come on—if this was someone else, you’d be laughing. You tossed her off the balcony, Violet.”
“She was trying to claw my eyes out! And I didn’t toss her. I just shoved and she fell.” And thank God for the ornamental shrubs one floor down.
“Hank said she came out lookin’ like she’d been in a cage fight with a porcupine.”
“Hank should shut up.”
Lily hooted. “Fat chance.”
Make that no chance. What Hank knew, everybody in the Panhandle would know within a couple of days. Violet slumped over her coffee cup, groaning again. “How could I be such an idiot?”
“Now there’s the million-dollar question.”
Violet rolled her eyes up to give Lily a death glare, which her sister ignored in favor of fetching a plate of muffins. Homemade, of course. Fresh blueberries. Real butter. Lily had inherited more than their mother’s lack of height and tendency toward plumpness. Lily was the anti-Violet—soft, fluffy, and content. The sisters were closer than they had a right to be, considering. Lily was a cowgirl by default—growing up, everyone had to pitch in—but she’d escaped to the kitchen every chance she got, the same way Violet had dodged housework in favor of trailing after her dad. Lily set the plate between them, mouth pursed thoughtfully as she picked out a muffin and peeled off the wrapper.
Violet hissed out a long breath that did nothing for her frustrated hormones. “I’m cursed when it comes to this stuff.”
“No. You’re stupid.”
Violet jerked her head up. “Excuse me?”
Lily gazed back at her, unapologetic. “You should be sittin’ there basking in the afterglow. Hank’s gonna run his mouth regardless—you might as well’ve stuck around and got your money’s worth.”
Violet gaped at her. “Awesome advice from the minister’s wife.”
“And now you know why I haven’t been invited to lead the ladies’ prayer group.” Lily plunked down her muffin and leveled a gaze that matched her unflinching tone. “How many times have we had this conversation, Violet?”
“I…um…a few.”
“Starting with the Earnest Fun Days Rodeo when you were sixteen,” Lily reminded her. “You and Clayton James, up in the announcer’s stand after the Saturday night rodeo.”
Otherwise known as The Night Violet Lost Her Virginity. An urban legend in Earnest. Violet had chosen their hometown rodeo to finally give in to Clayton’s persistent efforts to get her out of her jeans, so everyone from three counties was right there handy to witness her downfall. And his.
“You didn’t have to dump him,” Lily said. “Was it his fault he was so weak in the knees after you got done with him that he fell down the stairs?”
Violet felt her mouth pushing into a pout. “No, but if he hadn’t gone to squealing like a stuck pig, everybody might not’ve figured out what we’d been doing up there.”
“His ankle was broken.”
“So? He could’ve sucked it up until we got him back to his camper.”
“Harsh, Violet.” Lily turned the muffin with her fingers, studying it like a crystal ball. “That’s where it started, with poor ol’ Clayton. And a month later, the accident happened.”
Violet endured the usual wash of grief, muted by the years but never gone. “That’s got nothing to do with my dating habits.”
“It’s got everything to do with all of us.” Lily picked a blueberry out of her muffin and smashed it between her fingers. “Cole turned into, well, Cole. I was in such a rush to grow up I got hitched to my junior high boyfriend when I was nineteen, and you were so focused on helping Daddy save the ranch, you never got around to figuring out who you are.”
Violet’s jaw came unhinged. “What?”
“You want to think you’re so sensible, but let’s look at the evidence.” Lily cocked her head, doing a great impression of their mother at her most persistent. “After knowing Delon your whole life and having no desire to jump him, why that night?”
“I was on the rebound.”
“Pfft!” Lily gave a dismissive flick of her fingers. “You knew that would end when the big doofus graduated and went back to Wyoming. What else? Something made you take a second look at Delon.”
Violet made herself think back to a night she generally preferred to forget. “He was drinking like he meant it. And he was in a mood. Dark. A little crazy. Like he wanted to inflict some damage.”
“In other words, he reminded you of his big brother.” Lily laughed at the heat that flared in Violet’s cheeks. “Like you were the only one who had a crush on Gil back then.”
Sure—back when Gil Sanchez was still fun, still flirted with every female from eight to eighty and wasn’t mad at the world and the majority of the people in it.
“I didn’t sleep with Delon because I wanted his brother,” Violet said, pretty sure it was the honest truth. “I was worried. I thought I’d just sit down and make conversation, but he bought me a shot of tequila, then he asked me to dance…”
“He was lettin’ his badass side out,” Lily finished. “And you’ve never been one to say no to anything that looks remotely like trouble.”
The snippy remark pushed Violet over the edge from irritation to anger. “Go ahead, Lil. Rub it in. I’m an idiot when it comes to men.”
“I didn’t say that.”
“But you meant it.” She pitched her voice into a snotty drawl. “Why doesn’t that Violet Jacobs find some nice, sensible man to be a father to that boy of hers?”
“That boy already has an amazing daddy, and if you had any interest in nice and sensible, Delon wouldn’t still be sleeping in Beni’s room.”
Violet bunched her fist and knocked it against the granite. “I know. He is such a great guy, it’s stupid that I don’t feel…”
“No. Stupid would be convincing yourself to settle for playing Mommy and Daddy with a man who’s like a brother to us.” Lily pushed her mutilated muffin aside and propped her elbows on the bar. “Are you looking for a forever guy?”
“Right now? No.” Violet threaded her fingers through her hair, massaging her aching brain. “I’d just like to go out once in a while, have some fun, maybe get lucky. Is that so horrible?”
“Not if it’s what you want and nobody’s getting hurt…other than the occasional crazy ex-girlfriend.”
Violet curled her lip into a snarl.
Lily laughed. Then she got serious. “The problem isn’t that you’re dating the wrong guys, Violet. It’s that you won’t accept that you’re a sucker for the renegades, and you refuse to meet them on the dark side.”
“The…what?”
Lily waved an impatient hand. “You can’t date a wild-ass Cajun bronc rider in a sensible manner. It’s a violation of the natural order and it raises hell with your karma.”
Violet rolled her eyes. “Whatever you say, Great Guru.”
“The point is, some people are good at being bad. If you’re gonna dance with the devil, you should let him lead.” Lily propped her chin on her hand. “That Cajun hottie had been flirting with you for weeks. Whose idea was it to hold off until the Hickory Springs rodeo to do the nasty?”
Violet scowled, but muttered, “I wanted to wait until Beni was with Delon.”
“Uh-huh. And if the Cajun had had his way?”
“He tried to talk me into a midnight run to Galveston Island to go skinny dipping.”
“And you said no because that sounds risky, but it turns out the most dangerous place you could have sex with this man is in a respectable motel in Hickory Springs. You see?” Lily flashed a self-satisfied grin. “Where would you have gone last night if you’d left it to Joe?”
Heat shuddered through Violet at the memory of the look in his eyes when she met him at her front door. His voice hot in her ear at the Notch. Makes me want to shove you up against the nearest fence…
Lily jabbed a finger skyward, triumphant. “See? If you’d let him decide, you’da been golden, no one the wiser.”
“Except Mama, Daddy, and Cole.”
“Who are gonna know anyway. So…”
Damn. She hated when Lily had a point. Violet slumped over her mug, the coffee turning sour in her stomach. She’d made nothing but wrong moves since the day Joe showed up.
Lily reached over to squeeze her arm, voice softer but no less insistent. “You’ve gotta own it, Violet. Hold your head up, date whoever you damn well please, and let the world kiss your rear. You’re a smart, strong, amazing woman. You shouldn’t be asking anybody’s permission to live how you want.”
“Not even Beni’s?”
Lily gave her a crooked smile. “Not until he’s old enough to understand what ‘Mama’s gettin’ lucky tonight’ means.”
“So next week,” Violet said drily.
Lily laughed. “Knowin’ Beni, that’s about right.”
Violet straightened, feeling oddly better. “What about how I’m wasting my best years and someday I’ll regret not settling down while I can still snag a decent man?”
“That’s church lady talk.” Lily’s mouth curled into an impish smile. “Besides, one of these times you’re gonna slip and get tangled up with a guy who’s more than what you thought, and then we’ll see.”
The words echoed in Violet’s head as she drove home, sending a shiver of premonition up her spine. She shook it off. Her heart had proved to be a tough nut. A few scuffs here and there, but no real cracks. Joe Cassidy wasn’t gonna change that in two short weeks. But maybe—just maybe—she’d give her sister’s advice some thought. Stop fighting the inevitable and enjoy the men who attracted her. Her body heated instantly at the memory of Joe moving against her. Oh yeah. She could really, really enjoy Joe. Too bad he wasn’t likely to volunteer to repeat the experience after last night.