S
treelman opened his car door, but before getting in he pulled the small pistol out of his beltline and held it in his left hand. Once in the car he kept the pistol in his left hand, resting on his left thigh.
“We are going to do this my way, West. You just sit and listen. Don’t do anything stupid, and you won’t get hurt.”
“It seems to me that you are making this a lot more complicated than necessary. I’m happy to listen to your story. If you let me, I’ll even take notes.”
“I’m serious,” he said.
“I don’t mean to imply you aren’t. I’m trying to tell you that I will do as you want. I don’t want anyone to die tonight, especially me.”
He drove the car west, away from the beach and the hotel. I had my phone in my left front pocket of my jeans, but there was no way to get to it. Luckily, I had put it on silent when Young was interviewing us and hadn’t turned it out of the silent mode since.
“Doug deserved to die you know.”
“No, I don’t know anything. Why do you think he deserved to die? I’m guessing you killed him.”
He continued driving and didn’t say anything for the next minute. When we stopped at a red light at a well-lit intersection, I noticed a family sitting in front of an ice cream shop.
“If you don’t want to tell me, then there’s no reason for me to stay in the car,” I said, and in an impulse, I reached for the door handle.
The sound of the gunshot did a lot more than deafen me. It scared me to the point that I was surprised I hadn’t ruined my pants. I had looked away from him toward the door handle, so I didn’t see him raise the pistol and pull the trigger. The round creased the top of my forearm, doing little damage other than gouging a shallow path through what used to be skin, causing my blood to flow freely out of my arm. I looked at the wound and clamped my left hand down on it. The wound didn’t amount to much, but I wanted to stop the bleeding. I also needed to start thinking before I did anything else that might bring about a reaction from Streelman. If I had any doubts before, I now knew to take him seriously.
“Hey! If you kill me, who’s going to listen to your story.”
“I have nothing to lose. I don’t plan to live through the night. Whether you do, depends on how you behave. That shot was a warning. You won’t get another one, and you know, I can hardly miss your head from this distance.”
I saw the hole in the door and wondered if the round went all the way through. We had travelled too far for me to look back and see if the round hit anyone sitting outside the ice cream shop. Sweat had formed on Streelman’s forehead.
“I believe you. I also think Doug did do something bad to you. Why don’t you just turn yourself in? I certainly don’t plan on pressing any charges. I’m fine, and with a good lawyer, you can probably get off with manslaughter.”
“Too late for that,” he said. “I’d rather die.”
“Come on. Death is permanent. Most everything else can be overcome.”
“Not this.”
“Not what?” I asked.
“I’ll tell you, but not yet. When we stop.”
“You’ve got a wife and kids. Why do you want to hurt them by killing yourself? Think about it. No one can explain your side of the story to them better than you. I’ll try, but you know they’ll have more questions.”
“Doug was going to ruin me. He deserved to die. I begged him to let it be, but he laughed. He didn’t care about my life, not one bit. So, it was really his fault. If my life meant nothing to him, how did he expect me to care whether he lived or died?”
“You’re right. He was blackmailing you?”
Streelman glanced over at me. “So, you figured it out. Both Eric and Larry said you were too sharp for your own good.”
“No, I hadn’t figured anything out. No one had, including the police, but now they will focus on you. I was with a couple of the guys when you asked me to come down.”
“That no longer matters. Don’t you get it? I’ve already made my peace with this. I already sent an email to my wife saying good bye.”
If I had any doubt about his intentions, they disappeared. “Oh, James. What do you think is going through her mind right now? How do you think she is feeling?”
“Shut up!” His left hand raised slightly and aimed the pistol at my head.
The small pistol looked to be a 9mm. Because of its short barrel, its aim was only effective at short range. Unfortunately for me, our two feet of separation was well within its effective range. His hand covered most of the pistol, so I couldn’t tell the manufacturer, but I already had proof that it worked and was loaded. Nothing else really mattered.
“You ever see a guy kill himself?”
“No,” I said. “Seen too many dead bodies though. I don’t want to see another one tonight.”
“So maybe I should kill you first? Do you a favor?”
“I don’t mean that. I don’t want to see you kill yourself, but staying alive is a higher priority for me. You won’t be doing me any favors by killing me first. Kill me second,” I said in an effort to lighten the mood.
He grinned. “Don’t ask for that either. My ghost might come back and kill you. What do you think West? Is there some sort of life after death?”
“I hope so. I think so. It’s always seemed illogical to me that this pile of flesh and bone we call our body created consciousness.”
“All animals have some level of consciousness,” he said.
“I know that, but there is a difference. At least to me there’s a quantum leap from their level of consciousness to ours. Besides, why shouldn’t they have some level of consciousness, as you say.”
“We don’t behave any better than animals.”
“Worse in many cases, I agree,” I said.
“So, if you think I’m going to hell, why should I care what I do from here on out?”
“I never said you’re going to hell. I don’t know if there is a hell or what it might be like. For one thing, James, I don’t believe in easy definitions for things we don’t understand.”
“You don’t believe in the bible?”
I didn’t know where he was going with all this, but I figured keeping him talking might do some good. Maybe he still wasn’t sure what he planned to do with himself or me.
“Like I said, I don’t have the answers. I don’t disbelieve the bible, although I have to admit I’ve never read the whole thing. At the same time, my understanding is that a good portion of the bible has been rewritten and retranslated enough times through the centuries to question its validity. Not the story, only the specifics.”
“Yeah, people can’t be trusted.”
“You’re preaching to the choir. I spent my career in the air force learning that. Listen, James, why don’t you and I go to some hole-in-the-wall bar around here and get drunk. That would be a better way to end the night. Don’t you think?”
“You should have made that offer yesterday. It’s too late.”
“No, it’s not. You have a good reason why you attacked Doug. You can tell it anyway you want. Hell, you can spin it any way you want. No one else was there.”
“I’ve already told you, killing Doug isn’t the real issue. He’s scum. You know what’s interesting, West?”
“No, what?” We turned off the main road and started driving down a narrow two-lane road into an area with fields and scattered houses. He didn’t answer me, so I asked, “Where are we going now?”
He ignored my question. “What’s interesting is that I’m kind of looking forward to dying. It’s the ultimate escape. I think it’s like falling asleep and simply never waking up.”
“You dream at night?”
“At times, of course.”
“Think you might dream in death?”
“You can’t,” he said.
“You know people who have been in comas with very little brain activity dream.” I figured he wouldn’t know if I knew this or not. It didn’t matter.
“So, they’re still alive.”
“Their body is still alive by a thread. Their consciousness is fine. Some later say they heard people talking around them. I think that’s fascinating. It seems to support the theory how little the soul needs the body.”
“What are you trying to tell me, West?”
“That death may not turn out to be the peaceful sleep you are seeking. You can’t be sure, so why rush it?”
“You’re wasting your breath. I brought you with me so I could tell someone my side of the story. Now you’re telling me I might not want to die alone. You think if you went with me, it would be easier on me. You know, not going alone into that void.” He had a very unpleasant smile that I didn’t like at all.