five

The Consort

The Loving Dance

Become loving. When you are in the embrace,
become the embrace. Become the kiss.
Forget yourself so totally that you can say,
“I am no more. Only love exists.”

–Osho

Imagine yourself climbing out of the water and onto a large flat rock. Comb out your hair and look around you. This is a completely safe and sacred space. You feel relaxed, enjoying the surroundings with all of your senses. Smell the jasmine, roses, and plumeria that surround you; feel the soft brush of the breeze on your skin; absorb the heat from the rock deep into your muscles and bones. Open your heart to the loving presences of the trees, flowers, and water. Perhaps you see certain animals, birds, or guides come to your sacred garden and honor you with their love. You feel incredibly harmonious with all that surrounds you. As your inner love grows, you allow it to flow from you and surround you with golden light. Visualize a being of intense love lying next to you on the rock, holding your hand. This being lets energy flow into you, a safe and sacred liquid stream of light. Feel the bliss emanating from the guide or friend into your body. Allow yourself to experience the vital life energy, the orgiastic expression of fruitfulness, flowering and growing as you open even more deeply to inner love.

As we heal, we open more deeply to our loving selves reflected as the Consort, who is a lover or sensual-spiritual partner. The inner Consort is the lover within us, the one who relates to the people in our lives—and not just our partners, husbands, or lovers, but also our children, our parents, our family, and our friends. When our inner Consort is based on a foundation of power, we move through life relating to others with more ease and joy. This also allows us to experience states of loving that emanate from within rather than looking outward to satisfy desires or create happiness. The Consort comes to us in the form of Radha, the Indian lover of Krishna who is completely devoted to him yet also realizes that even when he is gone, they are inseparable, just as our own deep abiding peacefulness and self-love is always within, even when masked by pain or sorrow.

The Consort is the unification of our inner masculine and feminine selves, the harmony of opposites that dance the world into being and create beauty, love, and joy. This is the part of us that eventually transcends even those opposites and is a spiritual creature that is able to transmute desire into powerful levels of love and healing. The Consort is like a dancer, flowing with life in a way that is effortless and joyous. This is the movement between opposites, between light and shadow, birth and death, male and female, outer and inner. Exploring and working with the inner love of the self is a potent key to discovering our true being.

The Consort is also the aspect of us that is playful, sexual, and delights in the world of senses. When we stop to smell and purchase flowers for our room, put on lavender or jasmine perfume, delight in beautiful fabrics or the feel of nice sheets, we are experiencing our inner Consort. I encourage you to explore these sensual connections with your outer world as a way to nourish the self. Sometimes we become too busy to stop and smell the roses, but these are the things that imbue life with beauty and quality. Being able to make a space habitable, create a feeling or a mood, design a natural and spontaneous altar out of clutter, choose clothing for a concert that reflects the beauty and power of the music makers—all these are all innate within us and enhance our loving self as we explore the Consort.

Reclaiming the Sexual-Spiritual

The sensual energy that burns within women has been coerced into a very small space, and at times dominated completely. As with the Warrioress, there is a measure of fear associated with the sexual power that resides within women. Sexual-spiritual problems are buried within all of us, after experiencing generations of abuse and distortion. Today, one in three women is abused at some point in her life; one in five is raped. So when we begin to work with our inner Consort, there is a chance we are opening up a can of worms. The sexual energy of our being is often overwhelmingly separated from our notion of the spiritual. I see us on a stepping stone between two systems, one that does not honor the sacred feminine and one that does. Devanayagi Parameswaran, a Tantric teacher and sacred feminine leader, captures well the importance of healing this issue, saying, “When women are in their power, everyone in the world benefits. The entire universe is a dance between polarities, deified as Shiva and Shakti. To live a happy and healthy existence we must learn how to bring love and enjoyment into the dance we call relationships. Men must learn to nurture women so women may reclaim and maintain their divine powers. Women must redefine their expression of power to salvage the future of the Next Generation.”15

Our society is currently exploring the deeper possibilities of sexual energy, finding that women can have multiple orgasms extended over a long period of time. Women (and men) are capable of not just genital orgasm but orgasmic states that move through the entire body. Indeed, we are all born directly of this powerful creative life energy and by engaging in sexuality we are tapping into that power. This power is not only limited to pleasure; it is useful for healing, setting intentions, creating new projects, worlds, and ideas. I was pleased to read in Vicki Noble’s Shakti Woman how she rubs her legs together, bringing herself to orgasm, which helps her concentrate on various things, including her studies. I too have used this energy while studying for exams, writing, creating art. I use the energy that rises up as a way to imbue healing, prayers, and intentions into my work, so that they are further suffused with the life force. It is easy to dismiss this action as weird or aberrant, but in reality it is simply the life force, and we have for too long been disconnected from this healing energy. If we just look around us, we see the whole earth is in the process of making life, making love, rubbing, pollinating, birthing, and growing. Spirituality is sexuality in its true sense, the loving consciousness of self, the earth, and each other.

Also crucial to this process is the development and nurturance of the healthy masculine, the reclaiming of men who can be soft and receptive as well as skillful and imbued with their own inner power, love, and wisdom. Time and again, through the process of researching and writing this book, I have come across intensely condescending and hurtful words toward God, the god, the male, and the masculine. At times it even goes so far as to condemn the patriarchal system in a way that also condemns anything male. I understand, as a woman reading about the mass domination and the centuries of suppression, how much rage and fury is there and needs to be honored and that we are still entrenched in a system that is a kind of dominator culture that objectifies women. Yet, we can work to transcend these ideas; we do not have to fixate on our gender, but can allow this to loosen and dissolve a little, to recognize instead the dance between men and women, between male and female, between black and white, between negative and positive. We honor the incredible dance between birth and death, growth and decay, transcendence and groundedness. Working to more completely embrace the sacred feminine allows us to honor the sacred masculine as well, to redefine what that means in our lives, as well as in the lives of men around us. The inner Consort is the quality of that dance between the sacred feminine and masculine and developing our love so that it enriches our life more fully.

Exercise 5.1

Raising Energy

The first step in working with the loving sensuality of the Consort is to get in touch with your own vital life force and reconnect it with your entire life, instead of limiting it to sexual relationships. By doing this, you will help further heal your sacred feminine so that it empowers you with sensual self-love, enhances your energy, and boosts your vital life force. Many, many women associate their inner happiness with an external source, particularly finding a partner or man. Of course, this is a wonderful part of life, being with a partner, perhaps creating a family and connecting with community; however, it is even more important to recognize your own vital sexual energy and practice inner love so that you don’t rely on other people to fill that need for you. Once you find your own inner resources, the kinds of loving relationships you desire will find you more naturally.

This is a simple exercise to practice using your sexual energy in ways that are not related to normal sexual activity. First, choose something that you want to heal or manifest in your life. This could be anything from healing a bad relationship to manifesting a new car. Clearly visualize what you want to heal or manifest. If it is a healing, imagine the issue or health problem as healthy and use the sexual energy to vitalize the life force. Next, use self-pleasuring to stimulate your energy so that you move into a heightened state of intense feeling. If you are unaccustomed to practicing self-pleasure, then just touch your body in a way that feels good, natural, and easeful. Remember this is a practice to use sexual energy for your life, to enhance the beauty of life, rather than having a sexual fantasy. In this way you are reclaiming the connections between sensual energy and life. As you self-pleasure, if you are able to reach orgasm, then do so, and continue visualizing what you want to heal or manifest. Imagine the image radiating with waves of loving energy, radiating out into the surrounding environment.

As you come down from your orgasm, or feel ready to end the practice, then simply rest, pressing your hands to your heart. Breathe into the beauty of your body, of sensual pleasure and open-heartedness. If you feel pain, guilt, or shame while doing this practice, then send love to that area of your being. If this practice is really an issue and you are afraid or have no experience with self-pleasure, you may want to seek out further guidance to help heal the issues that are preventing you from accessing your vital life forces. In Chapter Two, Exercise 2.2 can help you reclaim the power and love that you deserve as a sensual and sexual being on earth. Just as you did with your reclaiming initiation, you can use this to reclaim your rightful sexual self. If further trauma arises, such as issues with abuse, I would recommend seeking out a healer or therapist who can further support deeper work.

Tantra

For thousands of years, most religious dogma has systematically split the two most powerful energies available to us: the spiritual and the sexual. We have been doggedly told generation after generation that the way to heaven, to God, to paradise is found through transcendence and letting go of the material, sexual, birthing body. Since the beginning of that split, perhaps some 6,000 years ago, only a few remains are left of the goddess worshiping culture, which unites the spiritual and sexual. One of those remains is Tantra, which literally means “web” and “to expand.” Tantric philosophy became prominent in India around 1,500 years ago in the fourth and fifth centuries. In historical terms, this is actually quite recent and marks one of the most accessible practices of honoring the sacred feminine in human religious history. Long before this, it is thought that Tantra was practiced by the goddess worshipping society of Dravidian people before being conquered by the Aryans circa 3000 bce. According to Sjöö and Mor, it was likely that “in ancient times the special potency of Tantra was transmitted through a female line of ‘power-holders’—a mysterious sect of women called the Vratyas.”16

In Tantra, women are the focus of the ancient yogic tradition. Swami Muktananda, an advanced yogic practitioner, in her discourse on female yoga states, “In the tantric tradition, the woman is considered to be higher than the man so far as the tantric initiations are concerned … [this] is purely a spiritual attitude in relation to the evolution of higher consciousness. The frame of a woman, her emotions, and her psychic evolution is definitely higher than that of a man. Awakening of the spiritual force (kundalini) is much easier in the body of a woman than in the body of a man.”17 This is a profound and compelling statement. She goes on to explain that because of the way our bodies cycle each month and are made for birth we have a higher capacity to connect to the spiritual world. Our sexuality is a reflection of this connection. Psychic dreams, visioning, journeying, and traveling between the worlds are as natural to women as menstruation and birth.

Krishna and Radha

Hindu mythology explores Tantra through the sensuous beauty of the lovers Krishna and Radha. Krishna is the loving and compassionate god, holding the qualities of beauty and making gorgeous music with his flute. He is blue, the color of peace and serenity, and is often painted or figured in a dancing pose, on the verge of joyous movement. Many images of Krishna include his loving partner Radha, and they gaze into each other’s eyes, hands meeting, with sensuous clothing and beautiful colors adorning their bodies and surroundings. They are the archetypal lovers as well as symbols of our inner male and female, the beauty of the inner Consort that finds the balance of joy and loving within.

The Tale of Krishna and Radha18

One lovely day, Nanda the cow herder went to Vrindavan, carrying his tiny infant son Krishna. He brought his cattle to graze by the banyan tree in the grove. Krishna, a bit bored, began to cast clouds in the sky, creating a coming storm. The sound of thunder rumbled far off and the clouds grew darker as the trees shook violently in the winds. Krishna began to cry and clung to his father, afraid of his own creation.

In the middle of this wild storm, the beautiful woman Radha appeared, emerging out of the pouring rains. She slowly walked toward Nanda and Krishna, swaying gently like swans. Radha’s eyes reminded Nanda of lotuses, and the darkness around them made them glow. Just between her eyes shone a large, beautiful pearl. Jasmine flowers dripped down her long, thick black braid and their fragrance filled the air. When Nanda saw her, he could not move, as her beauty was more great and wondrous than the light of many moons. Suddenly, tears sprung to his eyes and he bowed deeply, his heart opened in great devotion, and he offered her his child, Krishna. The illustrious Radha took the child, laughing delightedly. Radha offered Nanda a wish for anything he might like, but Nanda wanted only to remain in servitude to Radha. She happily granted Nanda unsurpassed servitude and love.

Radha then clutched Krishna to her heart and took him far away, embracing and kissing him as he began to remember the circle of their dance, quivering in joy. As she twirled around, forgetting herself in the dance of love, Krishna turned into a lovely handsome youth. He had warm dark skin, and smelled of sweet sandalwood. He lay down on a bed of flowers, smiling at Radha, so beautiful and serene, his eyes peaceful and full of love.

Seeing that the infant had changed into this glowing youth who lay before her, Radha was dazzled by his handsome body and her eyes drank the moonlight off his face. Eager for a new union and shivering over her entire body, she smiled, completely smitten with love. He said to her, “Radha, you are dearer to me than my own life. As am I, so are you, and there is no difference between us. Just as there is whiteness in milk, and heat in fire, and fragrance in earth, so am I in you always. A potter cannot make a pot without clay, nor a goldsmith an earring without gold. Likewise I cannot create without you, for you are the soil of creation and I am the seed. You are the woman, I am the man.”

Radha and Krishna were married by the god Brahma, the Lotus-Born One. They performed the marriage thread ceremony and circumambulated the fire seven times. Radha recited three mantras and placed a garland of parijata blossoms around Krishna’s neck. Krishna placed a lovely garland around Radha’s neck and then sat beside Brahma. They brought their hands together in prayer position at the heart center, and Brahma gave Radha to Krishna, as the father gives away his daughter.

Alone with Krishna, Radha was made shy and bashful by the intensity of their love. Shivering in excitement, Radha adorned Krishna with beautiful scents of aloe, sandal, musk, and saffron. She handed him a jewel encrusted cup filled with nectar and honey. He drank deeply from it, savoring the sweet flavors that swirled on his tongue. Krishna placed betel nut on Radha’s tongue and watched as she enjoyed chewing it in front of him. When he asked her for it, she laughed and refused to give it to him. Krishna then gently rubbed an ointment of sandal, aloe, musk, and saffron all over her limbs under her clothes, then pulled her close to him, against his chest. He loosened her clothing then and kissed her four different ways. The little bell she wore came off and the red lip color spread out over her face from his kisses. Her braid came undone and the vermillion bindi dot fell from her forehead.

Radha’s body was completely thrilled by the new union, and she was so dazed and full of love that she had no sense of day or night. Krishna embraced her limb for limb, body for body, playing out the eight ways of love as master of the Kama Sutra. Her body grew tender and sore from his loving bites, while her bracelets and anklets tinkled in their love play. Radha then forced his flute from his hand and Krishna took the mirror from her hand.

When the intense love play was finally over, Radha, smiling and glancing sideways at her beloved, affectionately gave Krishna back his flute and he returned her mirror. He then lovingly re-plaited her braid and carefully put on her vermillion dot. He dressed her with artful skill, paying careful attention to each fold in her clothing, smoothing it beautifully.

When Radha turned to dress Krishna, she found that he shed his youth suddenly and had become an infant once again, crying and hungry, just as Nanda had given him to her. Radha’s heart grew heavy and forlorn, and she sighed at the pain of their sudden separation. She fell to the ground sobbing, her heart breaking. That moment, a disembodied voice said, “Why do you weep, Radha? Remember Krishna’s dancing lotus feet! As long as the dance exists, he will return to it and you shall have all the love play with Krishna. There is no reason to cry. Take the infant home and know that he will return in due time.” Radha was comforted; she took the child but not without glancing once more at the pavilion and flower garden.

Quickly Radha left Vrindavan and went to Nanda’s house. She went in the blink of an eye, her lovely dress sticky and wet, and her eyes reddened. She gave the baby over to Krishna’s mother, Yasoda, saying, “Your husband was caught by the rain with your child and he is hungry. I had much trouble on the way—my clothes are wet, it’s a dreadful rainy day, and I was barely able to carry him on the slippery, muddy road. Take your child, give him the breast and calm him down. I must go now.” Yasoda took the infant and kissed him and fed him from her breast, and Radha went home to do her household chores. But every night Krishna returned to her to make love once more.

Keys to the Tale

Out of the wild storm created by Krishna emerges Radha, beautiful and glorious, gentle, like the calm in the center of the storm. She is not affected by its power or afraid, but is tranquil and glowing. Like many goddesses in myths, she possesses a rare beauty, one that shimmers over her entire body, making her glow. This beauty reminds us to embody the Consort within, the one who dances effortlessly and enables us to be at home in our body, honor it, nurture it, listen to it, and delight in its sensuality.

Once Nanda recognizes Radha’s divinity, he takes refuge in her, seeking her blessing. This portrays the art of surrender that is potent in the loving wisdom of the Consort. Surrendering in love, in lovemaking, in meditation, in life—this is the way toward openness, the path of the heart. When we devote ourselves to cultivating our path and really working with developing ourselves, we are opening the gateway to inner love and resources. Nanda represents the part of us that is the pure, whole-hearted caregiver. In the story, instead of wishing for riches or fame, Nanda wishes simply to devote himself to Radha as his teacher, and the goddess happily granted Nanda “unsurpassed servitude and love.” This may seem strange to us, to wish for the opportunity to serve in pure love, but it is the most potent wisdom of the heart, the purest form of being, and dissolves the ego completely. I had a similar experience when I met my teacher, an overwhelming wish to simply lie down at his feet and become his rug, forever. This feeling arose naturally after some years of my own work in meditation, Reiki, and contemplative study to help grind down my own self-cherishing. When we surrender to a teaching, a teacher, or a path, we are committed to finding the vast love that resides within.

Krishna then greets Radha with such love, remarking that “Just as there is whiteness in milk, and heat in fire, and fragrance in earth, so am I in you always.” This is a powerful message. These qualities define the substance; they are the very essence of milk, fire, and earth. This illuminates that the two beings are not opposites, as we tend to think of male and female in the West, but are essentially part of each other. The opposite of milk is not white, nor is the opposite of fire heat. They are the very essence of these things, the sensory qualities that make them what they are. Similarly, Krishna compares their relationship to the clay and the potter, the gold and the goldsmith, remarking that a goldsmith cannot be such without gold. Our inner love then is not separate from us; our joy and brilliance are there, they are not at odds with our depression or problems, but simply the essence of who we are as human beings. Activating our inner Consort enables us to reclaim that joy more fully.

Radha and Krishna then perform the wedding ceremony, to spiritually unite one another in sacred marriage. A tantrika, or practitioner of Tantra, may choose to be a householder and practice achieving divine ecstasy through sacred sexuality as well as other meditative and contemplative practices. Muktananda offers her profound wisdom here, noting that “In India a woman traditionally loves and reveres her husband as her guru, and he loves and reveres her as devi, as a goddess. This does not mean that one or the other is spiritually superior, but that the act of loving is the means to transformation, and that the purpose of marriage is to help one another to become greater than we could be alone.”19 This is a complex issue, because in the West, we do not really use marriage as a sadhana, or spiritual practice. Usually, we fall in love and try to maintain a romantic quality in the relationship; when this wears thin, we fall out of love and seek fulfillment elsewhere. When we fall in love, we tend to enhance the positive qualities of our lover, in a semi-delusion that is usually compounded by intense physical attraction. Later, when we discover those qualities to be minimal, we may start to dislike or even resent our lover. This is when we may choose to use our marriage as a sadhana, instead of running out to find a new lover. I am not saying we should stay with someone if we feel unfulfilled, sabotaged, or completely estranged, but I am calling for a closer examination of what our true motivations are when we decide to dissolve a relationship. Try devoting yourself to your partner for an entire day, just as Krishna does to Radha, and Radha to Krishna. Listen closely when he or she is speaking to you; instead of getting upset over requested tasks or ideas, simply do them or agree wholeheartedly. Imagine your partner is a teacher you admire and you are spending the day honoring and serving this person instead of taking them for granted. This is something we can strive to do with all the people in our lives, to honor them as aspects of god and goddess. This can be difficult and challenging, as our personal, smaller self will be confronted with the reality that it is less important than the devotional service. Yet this kind of service really encourages our heart to open and our personal attachments to dissolve.

The next part of the myth involves the love play and lovemaking of Radha and Krishna. After they are blessed by Brahma, their intimacy grows. At first they are gentle and adorn each other with sandal, aloe, musk, and saffron. That in itself is so beautiful, so delightful. Adding elements of sweet-smelling substances and soft oils enhances the sexual experience. This is also a way to tune into your partner, to pay attention to the entire body, not just the genitals. Lovemaking can be a sacred dance, an exploration, an adventure, not just a buildup to physical release. They take off each other’s clothing, and the red on her lips spreads out across her face from the kisses. Radha is so enthralled that she has no sense of day or night. She completely loses herself to the new union—which is new in these bodies, yet ancient as well.

The love play, the Tantric dance, is a story of both the outer and inner aspects of ourselves, the outer being our physical and emotional relation to ourselves, our lovers, husbands, partners, and friends. The inner is the inner masculine meeting the inner feminine: both as meditative then as spiritual practice. In the story, in the final sentences describing their lovemaking, they take each other’s specific tools or qualities; she takes his flute, he takes her mirror. They are filling each other up with the other—the masculine filling himself up with the feminine and in turn, the feminine taking on the masculine. Yet even more transcendent is the coming together as one, the deep and utter realization that inner awareness creates the true alchemy of transformation.

In the final passages of the story, to Radha’s surprise and sorrow, Krishna retakes the form of an infant, becoming the baby that he was in the beginning of the story. Radha symbolizes the part of us that separates once again from our lover, from that deep inner source of joy; the very real, relentless quality of being alive and having to survive and deal with day-to-day life. It is as if Radha, recognizing her own true nature, her own deep bliss, her own wondrous divinity, is then suddenly separated from this, and not only separated but conscious of this separation. She is well aware of the inability to reconnect, for now, with Krishna in that divine way as long as he remains in his baby form. Yet the divine reassures her that he will always return; thus our connection to the divine will also return.

Krishna’s return to infant state is a reminder for us to be vulnerable with our lovers, our families, ourselves. Part of this is the dynamic of taking care of each other in relationships; inevitably we all play out the roles of mother, father, child, and sibling. Again we see service and devotedness coming into play. In our society, elders and children are not as valuable as youthful attractive adults and can be brushed aside in the pursuit of money and beauty. This is not useful when we must deal with our partner’s or family’s aging, sickness, and vulnerability. Just as Radha does, we should allow ourselves to feel into and mourn the changes that happen when the children grow up and leave home, our partner dies, or we fall ill and cannot do some of the things we once did together. Mourning is a process of deep acceptance and helps to soothe our being and nourish inner love.

The final sentence of the myth reminds again of how connected these two are as each and every night Krishna still comes to visit her. Even though they are physically separate, they are still joined in the dreamtime or energetically. Similarly, we are continuously connected to our own inner joy and can access it through meditation, ceremony, myth, and dreams even in times of sorrow or pain.

Exercise 5.2

Connecting to Your Inner Masculine

This exercise encourages you to open up to your sacred masculine. Up to this point in the book, we have been working deeply with the sacred feminine and her power and love. We must address the qualities of the god as well as the goddess to achieve a balanced and loving self. Carl Jung, the founder of analytical psychology, spent a good deal of his life working with archetypes, the collective unconscious, and dream imagery. Part of his work addressed the animus or inner opposite self that exists within each of us. Defining our inner masculine helps to feel a sense of balance in our lives and also reduces the overt associations that our culture places on feminine and masculine.

For this exercise, you will need a piece of paper, a pen, and art supplies. Imagine that an inner masculine self resides within you and construct a dialogue with him. Ask him what qualities you associate with masculine and male. Write these down. What qualities or energies would you like to cultivate more fully in your own life, perhaps qualities that are attributed more to men or the realm of the masculine? Which qualities do you feel are also connected to your inner feminine or sacred female? Explore the different aspects of men you know and admire. When are men most appealing to you and why? If you feel negative qualities surfacing regarding the inner male, then send healing light to this part of you. Then use your art supplies to draw your animus or inner masculine. Spend time creating an image of your personal animus, one that speaks to you of sacred masculine qualities.

Finally, imagine the men you know more fully embodying empowering masculine qualities: aspects of courage, fearlessness, honor, and respect that are so needed in our world. Imagine sending love and strength to the healing of the sacred masculine.

Full Moon Ceremony

This ritual is a beautiful way to draw healing power into your body and spirit, as well as energizing and renewing your well-being. A drawing-down-the-moon ceremony can be used for a specific intention such as healing, enhancing intentions, or creating abundance. In this case, we will focus on drawing the moon down into us as sacred power to activate our inner Consort. The full moon is also connected to the mother aspect of the goddess, the ancient symbol of a full, pregnant woman, ripe with life and abundance, joy and well-being. We call on this full moon energy to enhance our own being through the power of ceremony. This ceremony can be done alone or in a group with just women or both men and women. If done in a group, designate specific roles for calling in each of the directions and one women to act as the priestess. The priestess (or yourself if you perform this alone) takes the role of keeping the ritual moving though its different aspects as well as channeling the goddess into drawing down the moon into each participant. This is the key element to the entire ceremony, and the priestess should feel comfortable in her role.

Gather together the following items:

• Four candles for the four directions, two for mother earth and father sky, plus additional candles or oil lamps to surround you
• Sensual offerings for the four directions: incense for the east, a rose candle for the south, crystal bowl of water with rose petals for the west, and saffron/sandalwood paste for the north
• Offerings for mother earth (sage, pearls, and/or shells) and father sky (crystals, fairy dust/glitter, and/or feathers)
• Pictures and images that speak to you of abundance, healing, sexual openness
• Symbols of beauty, love, and abundance such as eggs, crystals, feathers, shells, nests, bells
• Rose, sandalwood, lavender, musk, and/or jasmine oil
• Flowers
• Red tikka powder (red powder used by Indian women to mark their heads), red clay, or red ochre (hematite clay dust)
• Music and rhythm makers, specifically a rattle and a drum
• Sacred objects you wish to bless in the full moonlight
• Crystals
• Bowls of sea water or sea salt added to water
• Paper and pen

This ceremony should be done at night under the light of the full moon. You may choose to perform this outside if it is warm enough; either inside or outside, create a space that is comfortable for sitting and lying down, whether for just yourself or others as well. Next, set up your space with soft, lush fabrics, heaps of sweet smelling and colorful flowers, the images and candles, incense, and bowls of water. Water reflecting moonlight enhances the power of the sacred ceremony. Sprinkle glitter to create a space with endless reflections. Anoint the space with essential oils such as sandalwood, lavender, rose, or jasmine.

Next, anoint yourself (and each other) with the fragrant oils. Use the tikka or clay to mark each other’s chakra points. This red powder is a powerful and ancient symbol of the goddess and has been used by women for thousands of years; using it helps us to link ourselves to the millions of women who have been alive on this planet, practicing sacred worship under the full moon.

Then create the sacred space, first calling in the four directions. As you call in each direction and element, allow yourself to really feel the words drip from your tongue, to acknowledge the sacredness of speaking. Let the words themselves become offerings, your body become an offering to the goddess, the moon, the earth, to each other. Visualize each element moving into your body and expressing itself through you. For example, if you are calling fire and the south, really feel the warmth of the fire moving and blazing through your body, through the core of your being and radiating outward through your fingertips and toes. After calling each of the directions and presenting the offering, then call in mother earth, father sky, and the center. Take some time with these, allowing the power of them to seep into your body. Lastly, you will call in the moon, beckoning her to join the circle and enter your being, infuse you with her spirit.

Once you have called the directions, you can take a moment to write down any wishes that you want to manifest and put them on the altar. Think carefully of a few strong intentions that you wish to call into your life. Keep it simple, yet request the things you truly desire. The full moon energetically enhances all things and what you want to call in is magnified by its power.

Next, you will spend time raising the power of the sacred circle. This is done with the rattles, drum, and any other music makers as well as free toning or chanting. Start slowly with the sounds and let it build. Move your body, opening up the energy channels and freeing yourself to experience spirit.

When the priestess feels the power has been built up enough, she will motion to the main drummer or music maker to begin to slow it down. If you are alone, when you feel so intense that you may burst with love and power, begin to focus all of the energy raised into your heart space. Bring your breath and awareness into the heart and sit down; if you are in a group, form a circle. Visualize sending this incredible power and love that has been raised to help heal all beings and the planet. Spend several moments doing this. Send the love as a powerful intention to manifest your wishes on the altar and bless your magical tools and items. Imagine each other whole, healed, and healthy; visualize the people you love—even the people you don’t love—as well as your family and friends, your community, and the world receiving this powerful love and beauty that is radiating through your being.

Then, if you are alone, stand up to receive the full moonlight blessing. If you are in a group, the priestess will stand and call each person one by one to the center of the circle. There she will channel the power of the goddess from the moon and its beauty into you, using sound or mantra, gentle stroking or caressing, or pressing on points on your body. She will draw down this energy into your being and ask that the goddess bless you. If you are acting as the priestess, you will perform this role as if you are the goddess herself (which you are). Envision the moonlight shining down into each of the people you bring into the center of the group and anoint them with light and blessing. Use sounds such as “Ahhh … ” or a simple mantra such as “Receive the blessing … ” as you stroke and press the moonlight into each person’s body. Imagine their entire aura filling up with brilliant, shimmering light and that they are healed and whole. While each person is in the center of the group, the circle should also visualize the moonlight pouring down into the person, filling them up with beautiful, loving, and healing light.

After each person has had a turn, the priestess then calls the moon down into herself. At this time, the priestess may choose to also envision light and moon energy entering her. She will again raise the power of love and the sacred feminine through her own body with the specific intention of using the energy to bless the entire group. You could imagine this as a kind of deep honoring of any intense natural earth phenomena such as a volcano, ocean waves, earthquake, or storm. The priestess envisions the energy moving upward into her heart and outward to bless the group, as well as the earth. This is both a blessing and a deep gratitude for receiving the sacred feminine.

When this is over, the priestess may rest for a while, then stand up and signal to close the circle. If you are alone, this is the time to release the elements and directions as well as thanking mother earth. Allow the sacred objects to remain on the altar to be blessed for three days in the moonlight.

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15. Devanayagi Parameswaran, “Tantra: From Om to Orgasm,” www.humanityhealing.ning.com.

16. Sjöö and Mor, p. 219.

17. Swami Muktananda, Nawa Yogini Tantra, p. 4.

18. Dimmitt, Cornelia, and J. A. B. van Buitenen. Classical Hindu Mythology: A Reader in the Sanskrit Puranas. Philadelphia: Temple University Press, 1978.

19. Muktananda, p. 79.