Chapter 44
Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again.
—Luke 6:38
On Palm Sunday, five days after Jasmine had come home, Jessica was rushed to the hospital. It was Monday now; Tuesday would be Jasmine’s ninth birthday. Jessica and Gabrielle had planned a nice little birthday party for her. But now Jessica lay in the hospital barely able to keep her eyes open.
Jasmine didn’t want to leave her mother’s side. So she and Gabrielle sat there for hours, waiting on Jessica to wake up the next time she’d wake up. When Jessica opened her eyes and saw they were still there, and she discovered that they hadn’t been home since the last time she woke up, she insisted that they go home. She asked Gabrielle to call her lawyer and to let him know what was going on. “His business card is inside of that flowered box on the top of my dresser,” Jessica said.
Gabrielle called Robert Shaw’s office as requested and informed him that Jessica was in the hospital in critical condition even though she really didn’t understand why this was so important to Jessica right now. Robert Shaw then did something that made her be even more confused. He asked her to come to his office as soon as possible. She had Jasmine. He told her it wouldn’t take long but that it was imperative that she come today. He would be in the office for the rest of the day, so whenever she came, he’d make himself available to her. And if she couldn’t come to him, he would come to wherever she was.
When she told Zachary about the strange conversation, Zachary told her he had an hour available and would be glad to watch Jasmine while she went to the lawyer’s office. He could meet her at the hospital since Jasmine was insisting on going back now to be with her mother.
Gabrielle found the lawyer’s office easy enough. Robert Shaw was a short man with a balding head who looked to be in his late fifties, possibly early sixties. He had a smile that instantly put Gabrielle at ease.
The meeting lasted all of twenty minutes, but the impact of what he’d said was life changing. Jessica had granted Gabrielle power of attorney over all of her affairs as well as her health care proxy. In addition, Robert Shaw informed her, Jessica had filed a petition for appointment of guardian for Gabrielle to become Jasmine’s guardian in the case when she was unable to take care of her. Attorney Shaw had been instructed, upon knowledge of Jessica’s health’s decline, to begin the proceedings to make the petition for guardianship happen. And unless Gabrielle had any objections to any of this, he would begin as previously requested.
Gabrielle returned to the hospital slightly stunned. And what she saw when she got to Jessica’s room almost broke her heart in two. Jasmine’s head was lying on Jessica’s bosom and Jessica’s hand rested on Jasmine’s head as she slept. Gabrielle looked at Zachary, who stood away from the two with his hand up to his mouth.
Zachary shook his head slowly when he looked into Gabrielle’s eyes. She walked over to him, and he hugged her tight. Gabrielle had to be strong. She just wanted to gather Jasmine up in her arms and take all of the pain away.
After fifteen minutes, Gabrielle walked over to the bed. “Honey, come here,” she said to Jasmine.
Jasmine held her head up. Her face was wet with tears. Gabrielle wiped Jasmine’s face and smiled.
“I love her so much,” Jasmine said as she cried.
“I know you do. And she loves you so much, too.”
Jessica was trying to open her eyes. She then tried to say something. She beckoned for Gabrielle, who moved her ear closer so she could hear what Jessica was trying to say.
“Did you talk to Robert Shaw?” Jessica said, barely above being a whisper.
“Yeah. I did.”
Jessica tried to smile. “Is everything okay?”
Gabrielle tried to smile back. “Yes, everything is okay.”
Jessica’s eyes flickered like a light bulb preparing to blow. “Good. Tomorrow is Jasmine’s birthday. Have to have a big party for her.”
“I don’t care about a party,” Jasmine said, rushing to her mother’s side. “All I want is for you to get better.” Jasmine started visibly crying again.
“Zachary? Is Dr. Morgan still here?” Jessica asked as she tried to look where she thought he might be standing if he was there.
Zachary quickly moved to where she could easily see him. “I’m here.”
“Can you take Jasmine out for a minute? I need to . . . talk to . . . Gabrielle.” Her speech was becoming labored.
“I don’t want to leave you, Mama. I don’t want to go! Don’t make me go. I want to stay here with you.” Jasmine took her mother’s hand and held it.
“I just need a few minutes . . . okay?” Jessica smiled as she closed her eyes. “Just a few . . .”
“Come on, Miss Jazz,” Zachary said, taking her by the other hand. “What say you and I go down to the gift shop to see if we can’t find something to cheer your mother up?”
Jasmine nodded, but didn’t take her eyes off her mother. “We’ll be back soon, Mama. Okay? We’ll be right back.”
Jessica nodded one time. It was as though that was all the energy she could muster now.
As soon as they left, Gabrielle leaned down closer. “You’re going to be all right. You just have to keep fighting. You can’t give up, not now. We’ve been praying for God’s healing for you. Jasmine needs you.” Gabrielle tried to smile, but her mouth trembled as she tried to sustain it.
Jessica shook her head. “No, I’m not going . . . to be all right.” Her voice had faded now to a wispy whisper. “I’ve come to terms . . . that my healing . . . is not going to happen . . . on this side . . . of Heaven. But I want you . . . to do . . . something for me. I need you . . . to do it. I don’t have . . . the strength left . . . to do it myself. But it must . . . be done.”
Gabrielle could feel the tears making their way down her face. She wiped hard at them, determined not to let them win this time. “What is it?”
“First, I need you to promise me . . . you’ll take care of my Jasmine for me.”
“You know you don’t even have to ask that,” Gabrielle said, patting her hand.
Jessica closed her eyes and was silent. She was still for so long that Gabrielle thought she may have fallen asleep again . . . or worse. She saw her chest continue to rise and fall. She quietly released a sigh of relief. As soon as Gabrielle had almost decided to sit down, Jessica opened her eyes. Her eyelids had fluttered as she’d fought to open them.
“Gabrielle?”
“I’m here.”
“Gabrielle, I need you to help me tell Jasmine the truth . . . about her birth. She needs to know . . . now.”
Gabrielle began shaking her head. “I don’t think she needs to be told that, not right now anyway. There’s too much going on. We’ll wait until you’re better and get out of here.”
“Yes, she needs . . . to know . . . now.” Jessica reached like a blind woman, for Gabrielle’s hand. She tried to squeeze it, but there was no strength left in her. “I need you . . . to help me . . . tell her. We need to tell her . . . before I make . . . my transition. I don’t want her to . . . hold this against me . . . thinking I lied to her . . . all of these years. I need her to feel . . . like . . . I told her . . . the truth . . . myself.”
Gabrielle placed her hand tightly over her own mouth, just in case the primal cry she felt forming deep inside her belly might somehow make its way up and out.
“Please. I need you to help me . . . tell her.” Jessica’s eyes closed once again. “All of it . . . including who you are . . . to her. She’ll need to know this. She’ll need to know that . . . she’s not going to be . . . alone . . . once I’m no longer . . . here.”
“But we can wait—”
“No . . . we can’t. We’ve run out of time. And Jasmine needs . . . to know . . . just how much . . . she’s loved.” Tears were streaming from Jessica’s eyes, pooling into her ears and past them. Gabrielle got tissue and wiped her tears away.
“Very soon . . . Jesus will wipe . . . my tears . . . away.” Jessica tried to smile. “Gabrielle, you gave me . . . and my husband . . . the most beautiful gift . . . we could have ever asked for, ” Jessica said. “And now . . . reluctantly . . . but graciously . . . I am giving that gift . . . back to you. Live each day . . . with happiness . . . when . . . and wherever . . . you find it, Gab . . . rielle. I’ve discovered. . . through my years . . . of living . . . on this earth . . . that when we live . . . and we give . . . of ourselves . . . we find that . . . we never . . . actually die. Live . . . and continue to give. Promise me . . . you will . . . tell her . . .” Jessica was quiet again.
Gabrielle waited, fully expecting Jessica to open her eyes again so they could finish their conversation. Zachary and Jasmine returned thirty minutes later with a cute little brown, animated, get-well bear. Jasmine sat near her mother, cuddling the bear, waiting patiently for her mother to open her eyes so she could give her the present she’d so excitedly gotten Zachary to buy her.
But Jessica never opened her eyes again.