Midnight.
Riley stared at the ceiling, furious. Furious at Lauren for putting her in this situation. At herself for agreeing. At the world and the hospital and Kaminski and what she knew would happen if they got caught, hating herself for being rushed and not having time to plan things out properly, and it would be so much easier if she was going alone, and even though she knew why she agreed to it, and her heart still said it was the right thing to do, her brain was calling her heart an asshole, and—
Two a.m.
—so we just need to be quick and quiet and we can do this, the street going west is on the left side of the hospital, will take us close to the shore and there will be tons of tourists and shops where we can hide or we can go down to the beach because cop cars have a hard time on sand so it’ll just be a few bicycle cops, and let’s go over the steps in sequence one more time to make sure I haven’t missed anything or—
Three thirty a.m.
Riley stared at the ceiling.
Four twenty a.m.
“Fuck.”
Six fifteen a.m.
Maybe if I close my eyes and tell myself I’m just going to rest I’ll fall asleep because I won’t be trying to fall asleep, no pressure, I’ll just turn my back on sleep and let it sneak up on me like the fox in The Little Prince because that never fails and—
Six fifty-seven a.m.
Fuck.
Seven a.m.
The doors on the ward unlocked. Riley sat up at the sound of sensible shoes on tile.
“You look tired, Ms. Diaz,” Biedermann said.
“Didn’t sleep much.”
“Probably a reaction to stopping the haloperidol. You should be back on a normal sleep-wake schedule in a few days.”
“Good to know, thanks.”
While everyone else went to breakfast, Riley headed for the women’s showers, where she and Lauren had agreed to meet. Most of the patients hit breakfast as soon as the doors opened, so with luck they’d have twenty minutes before anyone else came in. She didn’t think there were microphones in the showers, because that would be seriously against the law, but most of what was being done under the ARC program was pretty sketchy, so she turned on all the showers to muffle the sound as soon as Lauren hurried inside.
“When are we going?” she asked before Riley could get a word out. “We have to go today!”
“We are.”
“How?”
And for just a moment, Riley hesitated.
What if this whole thing is a setup? There’s no way for me to know if any of this is real. It’s all between Lauren and Kaminski. If he suspects I’ve been scoping out the place, he could’ve cooked up this whole thing to find out what I’m up to and convinced her to help out. On the other hand, maybe this whole thing about her son is true and she made a deal with Kaminski to get out in exchange for selling me down the river.
Wow. Paranoid much?
I’m just saying it’s possible.
You saw the tears.
I’ve been fooled by tears before.
She’s not that good an actor.
You willing to bet a prison term on that?
Okay, maybe it wouldn’t hurt to hedge our bets a little. See what she does when the moment comes.
“The less you know ahead of time, the less you can tell anyone if you get caught,” Riley said. “Meet me at six fifteen by the entrance to the third-floor staff offices. That’s after the day shift leaves but before the night crew shows up, so nobody should be around. Then do exactly what I say when I say to do it.”
“What should I bring?”
“Do you have any money?”
“No.”
“Then leave everything where it is. If you take any clothes, the orderlies might notice, figure out something’s up, and start looking where they shouldn’t. This is strictly come-as-you-are, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Six fifteen sharp, Lauren.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll be there.”
There wasn’t much time to arrange for ground support, but she had to try. She’d gone looking for Steve when the shit hit the fan with Lauren, but nobody seemed to know where he was. So after scrounging up a hardboiled egg and cold toast in the cafeteria, Riley made her way to the regular-patient wing of the hospital, walking casually from room to room. But Steve wasn’t at any of his usual spots, and his room was locked.
She turned a corner to see Henry carrying a load of blankets down the hall. “Hey, Henry.”
“Ready Riley,” he said and smiled. “What’s shakin’?”
“Nothin’ but the leaves on the trees.”
“There you go,” he said, laughing as he passed her.
“Do you know where Steve is? Steve Newman?”
“He’s out.”
“Out? As in out out? Discharged?”
“Left last night on a supervised visit with his sister. Should be back later tonight. Why, you need a Snickers?”
“No, I’m good,” she said as he continued down the hall, “just wondering.”
Changes nothing, she told herself, pushing down the first tremors of panic. We went into this knowing that in the worst-case scenario we’d be on our own, and we are, and that’s that, and here we fucking go.
For the next nine hours Riley did everything possible not to draw attention to herself without looking like she was trying to avoid attention. She nodded but not too much and talked but not too loud and smiled but definitely not too big because she wasn’t known for being a smiler, not that any of it mattered because she didn’t hear any of the things she was smiling or nodding about because 99 percent of her brain was screaming.
Lunch lasted a day and a half.
Four o’clock came.
Two years later, five o’clock finally showed up.
Nerves on edge, in desperate need of silence but too agitated to go back to her room, Riley walked to the solarium, where a big clock adorned the wall opposite the windows. She kept glancing to the clock, certain at times that it had stopped ticking. Just breathe, she told herself. We can do this. Just breathe.
Five fifteen.
Five twenty-one.
She looked up as Frankenstein sat beside her on the bench, his eyes eager for the day’s reading.
“I can’t,” she said. “Not today. I’m . . . there’s a lot going on and . . . this isn’t a good time.”
He took a moment to process what she said, his expression turning soft and lost when the words finally lined up.
I can’t do this with him here. I need to focus.
“Why don’t you head on back to your room and get some rest?” she said. “We can do this tomorrow.”
She knew it was a lie, that with just a little luck she’d be far away by tomorrow, and from the hurt look in his eyes, he knew it too. I’m such a terrible liar, she thought. I should probably work on that.
He stayed where he was.
“Fine, I’ll go,” she said, and started to stand.
He took hold of her by the wrist. Not enough to hurt, just enough to say, Don’t go.
She remembered the day he launched himself at an orderly trying to feed him, and knew that don’t go could turn into something far more dangerous in a second.
“Let go,” she said, her voice low but firm.
He searched her eyes.
“Let. Go.”
His lips thinned, fighting some inner instinct to lash out, and for a moment Riley thought this could go either way. Then he let go, his arm falling limply to his side as he turned away, gaze fixed on the fading daylight beyond the window.
“I’m sorry,” she said, then hurried out of the solarium.
Five fifty-seven.
Let’s go.
* * *
As she approached the final turn that led to the third-floor offices, Riley felt herself shaking and wasn’t sure if it was fear or adrenaline. Doesn’t matter, I’ll take either one as long as it helps me get the job done.
She stopped at what sounded like footsteps behind her, and glanced back. The hall was empty. She started walking again. The sound returned.
I was right. She sold me out. That’s Kaminski or an orderly or Henry, and he’ll be so disappointed, or—
Riley allowed a sigh of relief as Lauren turned the corner behind her. She held up a hand—no talking—and started walking several paces ahead of Lauren, so it would look like they just happened to be in the same hall. At the next intersection, Riley made sure no one was watching, then quickly sidestepped around the corner and waited, back to the wall as Lauren followed. The office wing was off-limits to patients, and this time she wouldn’t have an excuse for trespassing, so if anyone saw them, it would all be over.
As they made the final turn into the office hallway, Riley stopped at a sight that sent her heart straight up into her throat.
All of the doors that had been open during her first visit were now shut.
Shut doesn’t mean locked, she told herself, fighting panic.
The first door was unlocked, but she knew from her previous expedition that it was too far from the outside ledge to be of use, just a straight three-story drop.
The second door was locked.
Door three—locked.
Door four—locked.
Door five. Last chance.
She turned the knob.
Unlocked.
She hurried inside, waved Lauren in after her, then shut the door and ran to the window. From here it was a four-foot drop to the narrow, ivy-covered ledge. It was awkward but doable as long as they didn’t slip and fall and smash their spines on the concrete. Easy peasy, right?
Lauren reached for the window lock.
“No, wait!” Riley said. “Check for sensors first!”
Lauren ran her fingers along the left edge of the window as Riley examined the right.
“Anything?” Riley asked.
“Not here. You?”
“No. We’re good.” Maybe. Only one way to find out.
Riley took a deep breath and cracked the window open. Nothing happened. She moved it a little further. When no alarms sounded, she slid it open the rest of the way. Cool air blew through into the office.
She checked the screen in case it was wired, found nothing, and tugged hard. It refused to budge. “Give me a hand,” she said. “Hold the bottom while I push up at the top, so it doesn’t fall outside.”
They rocked the screen back and forth until it popped out of the frame, then eased it back inside and set it on the floor.
“Okay, here’s what we do,” Riley said. “That ledge goes all the way to the end of the building, then turns left and goes around back. If I’ve paced this out right, once you turn the corner there should be a short drop from the ledge to the roof of the air conditioning building. From there we can climb down to the parking lot. Once we hit the ground, do not run, you’ll draw attention. Just walk out like you parked around the corner while you were visiting someone inside, turn right, then go left at the first street. That’ll take you west, toward the water. After that we split up. Got it?”
“Yeah, I’m good.”
“Okay. You go first.”
“Why not you? It’s your idea.”
Which is just the sort of question she’d ask if Kaminski wanted me to go out alone so they can grab me.
“Someone has to push the screen back into place so the room will look normal if anyone comes by,” Riley said. “I’m taller, so I should be able to reach it from the ledge.”
“All right. Thank you.”
“We’re not clear yet, so get your ass outside.”
Lauren pulled a chair to the window, climbed on, and balanced precariously on the edge, legs swinging out into space. “It looks slippery. Give me your hand.”
Riley took hold as Lauren swung the rest of her body out the window, stretching down until her toes reached the ledge. “You got it?”
“Yeah, I think so,” Lauren said, and risked letting go. “Okay, I’m good.”
“Start moving, I’ll be right behind you.”
Fingers pressed to the outside wall for balance, Lauren inched her way along the ledge as Riley reached for the screen, then looked outside one last time to make sure no one was around.
Here we go, she thought as she leaned out the window and—
Powerful arms grabbed her from behind, pinning her arms to her side. She tried to cry out, but a hand covered her mouth. She kicked against the wall, trying to throw them both to the floor, but he held on tight, carrying her back through the door. She thrashed and elbowed him as hard as she could, biting at his hand, but the skin was too tight to get a grip and he wouldn’t feel it anyway because now she knew, even before she saw their reflection in the window that it wasn’t Kaminski, it was him, dragging her down the hall as—
Alarms shrieked all around them. He pressed his back to the wall, hugging the shadows as orderlies raced down an intersecting hallway. Once they were gone he started moving forward again, dragging her with him to an empty room outside the office area. He pulled her inside, kicked the door closed, and let go.
“Why did you do that?” she yelled. “I was almost out!” She slammed a fist into his chest, but he didn’t move, didn’t react, as if she was beating dead flesh, so she hit him again. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”
He said nothing but didn’t move or try to stop her from hitting him. When she finally slid to the floor, exhausted and spent, he studied her for a moment, then turned, opened the door, and stepped back out into the hall. As he walked away, she recognized the sound of his footsteps and realized that he was the one who had been following her earlier.
She wiped away tears of rage. Goddamnit! Fucking asshole! Was he mad that I didn’t read to him? Is that why he didn’t want me to leave? Selfish prick!
McGann would find the hole now, and they would plug it, and her only way out was gone, just like that—gone and fucking gone!
Sonofabitch!
* * *
Once the alarms were turned off, the ARC patients were ordered back to their rooms, and the ward was put into lockdown overnight. Unable to sleep, Riley rocked back and forth on the narrow bed. She didn’t know if Lauren had gotten away or if she’d been caught, and the uncertainty was eating her alive. Attempted escape from a prison program was a felony offense, and they’d want to know if there was anyone else involved. Riley had been willing to roll the dice when it was just her because she had at least the illusion of being in control of her own fate, always able to find some angle to play, but she had no idea what Lauren was doing or saying, or if she was making a deal to give up Riley to save her own skin.
She closed her eyes, feeling as if she couldn’t breathe, wishing she could tear her skin off or sink into the earth, where no one could find her.
Seven a.m.
The door didn’t open. Biedermann did not appear.
They know, she decided. They’re not opening the door so they can keep me locked up until the badges show up.
Then she realized that she hadn’t heard the buzz of any of the doors being unlocked. Something’s up, she thought. Maybe Lauren got away.
Holding tight to that fragment of hope, she threw an arm over her eyes and finally dozed until being startled awake when the doors buzzed unlocked at a quarter past eight.
Biedermann’s voice echoed on the PA system. “All ARC patients report at once to therapy room one. All ARC patients to therapy room one.”
Riley stepped into the hallway as the others came out of their rooms. “Does anyone know what’s going on?” Danny asked the group.
“No idea,” Jim said, glancing at Riley. “You?”
Riley shook her head, too tired to lie.
Then Hector looked around and said, “Where’s Lauren?”
“I heard one of the orderlies say she tried to escape,” Angela said. “Wasn’t sure if it was true or not, but I guess maybe it was.”
As they waited in therapy room 1, Riley leaned forward in her seat, stomach knotted so tight that she had to fight the urge to throw up.
“You okay?” Callie asked.
Riley shook her head no but didn’t answer. Couldn’t reply.
Not knowing is the worst. Can we just get this over with so I know how badly I’m fucked?
After another twenty minutes, the door opened and McGann and Kaminski entered, followed by Lauren, her arms held firmly by Henry on one side, and an orderly on the other. Her eyes were red from crying, and when Riley caught her gaze she looked away.
She told them, Riley thought as the rest of her stomach fell away. They know. It’s over.
McGann stepped to the front of the room and turned to face the group. “As some of you may already know, we had an attempted escape last night. This is a serious incident because while this is a hospital, the ARC program operates under the jurisdiction of the criminal judicial system under which you were convicted, and incidents like this are punishable to the full extent of the law. In this case that means a penalty of between three and ten years in state prison.”
Riley closed her eyes, fighting panic.
“After we’re done here, Lauren will be taken to the Washington Corrections Center for Women to await additional sentencing based on this latest offense. However, as an act of charity we told her that we will ask for a shorter sentence if she gives us the name of anyone else who was involved in this incident.”
Here we go.
“We brought you here because if that person will step forward and voluntarily confess to their actions, we will be inclined to make a similar recommendation. If not, we will recommend the maximum available penalty.”
It’s over. You lost. Take what’s coming to you, she thought, and shifted her weight to her feet.
“I told you there wasn’t anybody else!” Lauren said, loudly and quickly.
Riley froze.
“Lauren, we all agreed that you wouldn’t say anything during this session, that you would let us handle this our way,” Kaminski said.
“Fuck you! I didn’t agree to shit!”
“Calm down, Lauren,” Henry said quietly, “or we’ll have to put you back in the restraints.”
“I want to see my son! I have a right!”
McGann’s lips thinned angrily. “Lauren, had you only waited, if you’d just talked to us before you did all this—”
“What difference would it make?”
“It would have made every difference, Lauren! Because by the time you pulled this stunt it was already too—”
He caught himself and bit off the last word.
But everyone in the room knew the word was late.
Lauren paled. “What’re you saying?” She looked to Kaminski. “What is he saying?”
“An hour before your attempted escape, we received word about your son,” Kaminski said, then paused, as if trying to figure out how to say what he wanted to say. Then he gave up and just said it. “I’m sorry, Lauren . . . he’s gone.”
Lauren’s knees buckled, and Henry had to keep her from falling to the floor as she started screaming, a full-body cry of grief and sorrow that Riley knew all too well.
Then Lauren’s eyes locked on Kaminski with the light of madness, and she lunged at him. “This is your fault, you son of a bitch!”
“Okay, I think we need to get her out of here,” Kaminski said.
The orderlies started to lead her out when suddenly she yanked hard and the orderly lost his grip, tripped, and fell. Henry tried to grab the other arm, but she pulled free and ran out.
The room emptied, following as she raced into the cafeteria.
“Close the door!” Henry yelled to an orderly behind them. It slammed shut, cutting off her escape.
Kaminski approached slowly, hands raised and open. “Lauren, you have to try and calm down. You’re only making the situation worse.”
“Worse? Worse? How the fuck can this get worse? My son is dead! He’s all I had!”
“There’s nothing you can do for him now. All you’re doing is hurting yourself.”
“Yeah? You want to see hurt?”
Lauren picked up one of the chairs, but instead of throwing it at Kaminski she slammed it into the window, shattering the glass into shards and revealing the chicken wire within.
“Stop it!” McGann yelled. “You can’t get out that way!”
“No?” She picked up a jagged piece of glass. “Watch me.”
Riley lunged for her, but Danny held her back. “Lauren, no!” she yelled.
“Take a good look, you sadistic motherfucker,” Lauren screamed, fist clenched tight around the glass, blood leaking between her fingers. “I’m going home to see my son! I’m going home!”
And she dragged the glass across her throat.