Ever open the door of a child’s room and feel as if the mess might jump out and grab you? Contrary to most parents’ expectations, kids are—with a few notable exceptions—not naturally neat. In fact, most are freakishly not neat!

It’s never too early to insist on simple rules that can affect health: washing hands before meals, brushing and flossing teeth, clipping fingernails. When it comes to these things, early expectations clearly presented will prevent problems later.

The same is true of establishing a sense of orderliness. If you want your kids to make their beds, instill that habit as soon as your child can pull up the sheets by himself. (Be sure you’re making yours as well.) Same goes for picking up clothes and putting away toys. With repetition these basic life skills become second nature. But you’ll have to keep after the kids until these skills become engrained. A checklist taped to a bathroom mirror works wonders, especially if privileges are revoked when reminders are ignored.

Cleanliness reflects inner pride. Your child’s self-worth shows in clothing choices and hair decisions. Sometimes there’s no nefarious subplot, no boiling turmoil. Kids simply follow trends. However, if you see bizarre twists in appearance grow into disrespect for the family, tap into a professional’s expertise.

Regular showers, clean face and hair, and neat rooms are requirements of polite society—and should be established habits well before your child leaves home. Your kids need to see that appearances matter—to prospective employers, roommates, potential spouses. They tell the world how a person views himself. Teach your kids the importance of making a lasting but not lingering impression.