Circe

hi Odysseus
what are you doing for dinner tonight

Circe.

what
oh my god whatttt

Circe

stop it with my name
i don’t know what you’re mad about
are you mad

Circe I’m not coming over for dinner

whyyyyy

you know why

no i don’t
I’m a witch
not a
not the captain of knowing why of things

what are all those pigs doing outside your house

I don’t know
whatever pigs do
truffle-hunting

Circe

i think the technical term is mycophagy
but I’m not 100% on that

where did the pigs come from Circe

i don’t know
a pig farm
a pig mommy and a pig daddy who loved each other very much
and gave each other a special handshake

CIRCE

oh my god okay fine
they’re your crew, you got me
i turned all of your friends into pigs

why did you turn my friends into pigs

i don’t know
maybe the real question is
why are your friends
so turn-into-pigsable

turn them back into humans

will you come over for dinner if i turn them back into humans

turn them back into humans first and we’ll talk

uuugh
Finnnneeeee

and turn them back into REGULAR humans

what do you mean

just like how they were before
not
i don’t know
half-pig men
or a thousand years old
or with no arms
just the same, normal people

haha oh my god
what do you even think i am
i would never do that

Circe
you own an entire island of badgermen

you don’t know that island wasn’t already like that when I got here

was it like
was it full of half-men half-badgers?

i don’t have to answer that question
it was full of a lot of things when i got here
anyhow shut up
i fixed your stupid friends
who by the way are stupid and boring

CIRCE

im kidddddding godddd