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Tonya
“I’m going in after her,” Roy announced.
They were sitting at their kitchen table looking at their lunch.
“And how do you plan to do that?” Tonya asked.
“I’m going to knock on her door and then go in and get our daughter.”
“Mrs. Patterson doesn’t open the door.”
“She certainly did for our daughter!”
“Yes, she did. And isn’t that interesting?” Tonya had been wondering about that. How had that gone down? Had her daughter been desperate enough to knock on Mrs. Patterson’s door? And if so, Mrs. Patterson must have sensed her desperation in order to not only open the door but invite her in? Tonya could hardly believe that Emma had spent the night there. And yet, she was fairly comfortable with it. Emma was safe and she was close-by. And she wasn’t trapped in this house having to deal with the fallout of her father’s mess.
“Maybe we should call the police.”
She hated the sound of that. She didn’t want to complicate Mrs. Patterson’s life simply because the woman had been kind to her daughter. But how to convince her husband of that?
“That would only embarrass ...” She’d almost said “you” but she caught herself in time and said “us” instead. “She hasn’t committed any crime, and the police would just laugh at us.”
Roy groaned. “You’re probably right.” He put his head in his hands. “Why haven’t they called yet?”
The elders. This was what he was really upset about. He was only trying to distract himself with his daughter’s whereabouts.
“It’s only been an hour.”
He looked at the clock. “An hour and a half.”
Fine. Whatever.
“Did you notice that the Puddys weren’t in church?”
She had indeed noticed that, but she hadn’t been surprised. Why would they want their family to go sit under an adulterer pastor? Why would any family want that?
“That doesn’t look very good.”
“I doubt anyone even knows they were a part of it.”
He gave her a pitying look. “You are so naive. Everyone knows all of it.”
She had so many questions she wanted to ask him, and this was her chance. He was right there in front of her, waiting for the phone to ring. And yet she couldn’t quite muster the courage.
Suddenly, he slapped the table and stood up. “I’m going to get her.”
“Wait!”
He stopped and looked down at her. “What?”
Ask him. Do it for Emma. Distract him. Her thoughts chased one another around in a sickening game of tag. Which question to ask and how to phrase it?
He turned toward the door.
“Isabelle and Mary Sue knew,” she spat out. “Did you know that people knew?”
Slowly, he turned back toward her. “What did you say?”
His anger emboldened her. Or maybe it was the lack of justification for that anger. “You’re worried about how it looks to people that the Puddys weren’t in church. But one of the Puddy children knew you were having an affair. And so did Isabelle.” He opened his mouth to argue, but she talked louder and faster. “There’s no way two children were the only ones to know, so others must have. I’m asking you if you knew they knew?”
“Of course not,” he spat out. “If I’d known they knew, I would’ve stopped it.” His face jerked as if he’d been slapped by his own words. This was the closest he’d come to admitting the truth, that he’d knowingly, strategically, deceitfully carried on with a married woman.
“Where did you do it?” she quietly asked.
“Tonya, don’t do this.”
“Where?”
“Where what?”
“Where did you have your affair?”
“Oh, stop calling it an affair! You make it sound like it was some long drawn-out romantic—” Again, he caught himself.
“If it wasn’t a romance, then what was it?”
“It was just sex!” he said too loudly. “Men have needs!”
He’d done it again. Turned the tables. Made it her fault. She wasn’t sexual enough for him. He had “needs.” He’d had to go elsewhere to get those needs met.
This trick wasn’t going to work this time. She knew this wasn’t her fault. “Don’t talk to me about needs.”
His eyes widened. He hadn’t been expecting that.
“Where did you do it?” she asked again. Her voice had a sharp edge to it.
His face twisted up, and he suddenly looked reptilian. “I’m not going to answer that question. So stop asking it.”
“Do you love her?”
His laughter answered her. She expected this to be a relief. She thought this would be good news to hear that he didn’t really care about Alexis, but it wasn’t a relief and it didn’t feel like good news. It felt like nothing. It didn’t matter whether he loved Alexis. “I don’t know if I can do this,” she said quietly.
He looked at the phone. “Wait to hear from the elders. If they fire me, you can leave. I’ll help you pack.”
“And if they don’t fire you, I can’t leave? Is that what you’re saying?”
He looked up at her. “I thought we already agreed on this?”
What had she agreed to, exactly? She couldn’t remember. She was confused, and her confusion made her angry. Her heart ached for Emma, for the comfort of her presence.
The phone rang.
