Matt’s mind cleared as soon as he got into the canoe and floated out across his lake. Not exactly his lake, but he liked to pretend it was. His was the only house visible for a quarter mile, and the other land around the area, being protected, made it illegal to build on.
It kept his house secluded and private, which he always thought would be great for raising a family. There were plenty of woods to explore, a lake to conquer, and animals to see. Enough land for a swing set and a pool, and a perfect spot for a hammock where you could look up at the night sky without any trees obstructing the view.
Four years later, he was still family-less and alone in his seclusion. The idea of ever having a family like the one he grew up in dwindled more and more with each passing day. He tried not to focus on the things he didn’t have, though.
Being out on the lake was his quiet salvation—the place he went to clear his head and relax. Ever since the night he found Shay on the floor of her bakery, tears in her eyes and defeat pressing down on her shoulders, he couldn’t get her out of his head.
Everything about her was a living, breathing reminder of the love he was once capable of. As crazy as it seemed, he missed having her in his life.
The fact that she was being stubborn about the cameras and not locking her damn doors only gave him an excuse to see her when he should have been putting distance between them. If the past told him anything, he was setting himself up for disaster.
He put his oars in the water and rowed out his frustrations, clearing his mind of all things Shay Michaels.
A hawk soared above him, spreading its wings wide and gliding across the blue sky. He heard the call of a male wood frog that sounded very similar to a duck quack and saw a turtle perched on a big boulder close to the shore.
He couldn’t believe he once thought about giving this all up, the fresh air, wide open spaces filled with trees and wildlife. All of this was his home and there was no way he would’ve been able to stay away for long.
Once his arms started to feel the familiar ache from rowing for too long and too fast he headed back home. He had about an hour before he had to head into the station, and he wanted to do a little research before he did.
A couple hours later, dressed in his uniform, he walked into Shay’s bakery, wincing at the sensory overload and quickly putting on his sunglasses. He was amazed he didn’t get calls about people having seizures or going into shock from walking into this place.
Shay’s back was to him, and she called over her shoulder. “Be with you in just a moment.”
He made his way to the counter and watched as she created a rose with a bag of frosting. Her attention to detail was admirable. She placed the rose on a cake and spun around with a big smile. When she noticed who awaited her, the smile curved down into a frown.
“You.”
“Me.”
“What can I do for you today?”
The front of her hair was knotted in a single braid and secured with the rest of her hair in a bun, accenting the heart-shaped curve of her face. She was fresh-faced and beautiful with only a tint of color to her lips and cheeks.
He placed the papers he’d printed out from his computer on the counter and slid them across to her. “I did a little research and think this would be the best set up for you. It’s nothing crazy, just a few cameras to keep an eye on things when you’re not here.”
He thought she’d be grateful for his initiative, but he was met with a roll of her eyes. She slumped forward and pushed the papers back to him. “I told you I’m not installing cameras.”
“I think you need to…”
“I think you need to respect my wishes.”
He took a deep breath, knowing she was just being difficult at this point. He needed her to understand this wasn’t just for her safety, but also for her bakery. Or maybe, he knew she was withholding information from him, and he wanted to get to the bottom of it. If she was in danger for any reason, he wanted to be able to help her. What he didn’t know put her at risk. Made it impossible for him to know how to keep her safe and that single thought gnawed at him.
If anything were to happen to Shay because she was too scared or too proud to tell him the truth, then he’d never forgive himself. He needed for her to trust him like she once did.
“Can’t you just think about it?”
“My answer won’t change. Besides, it’s too much money. I’m doing well, but not that well. I can’t afford the extra expense.”
“You have to look at it as a good investment… kind of like insurance. You’d even have the capability to set it up so you can watch from home. You would know everything that was going on here even when you’re not.”
She shook her head. “I appreciate your concern and the time you put in for the research, but I’m not willing to lay out that kind of money. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have customers to check on.”
Shay went around the counter and walked over to a couple sharing a plate of cookies. Matt recognized them as Martin and Judy Clark, a middle-aged couple who always followed the speed limit and stopped at the crosswalks.
That beautiful smile reappeared as Shay approached them.
Matt knew when he was being blown off. He placed the papers back on the counter and walked out, hoping Shay would at least look at the information before tossing it into the trash.
***
Shay felt Matt’s presence slip away as she heard the door open and shut. She kept her attention focused on the Clarks as they told her about their newest adventure in mountain biking. They were newly empty nesters and were trying to find ways to fill their time. Shay thought it was adorable and loved listening to their stories of discovery.
Next week they had signed up for a glass blowing class at Kate’s studio. They were all about exploring all the things Red Maple Falls had to offer—things they never had a chance to do because they were busy raising a family, nurturing their children, and setting them out into the world on their own.
More than anything, Shay envied them. When they spoke about their adventures, they laughed and smiled, but when they spoke about their children, their faces lit up, eyes sparkling with love and admiration.
Shay could only guess what that felt like, and the older she got, the more she came to realize she would never know for sure. Her biological clock was ticking away the days faster and faster, and pretty soon her window would be gone.
Growing up as an only child, she dreamed of a big family to call her own. A house full of children just like the Hayes. Whenever she’d be invited over for dinner during her summers in Red Maple Falls, she’d pretend she was a part of their family. That she had brothers to disagree with and sisters to hang out with. Those moments defined what she wanted out of life.
She loved her grandparents fiercely, but even their love wasn’t enough to fill the void her heart bore—the small part that wanted a little brother or sister, someone else to have in her corner when her mother was unreasonable and her father was too busy working.
“Have you ever tried, Shay?” Judy Clark’s voice broke through her thoughts.
“Mountain biking? No, I’d hurt myself.”
Martin Clark laughed. “That’s the fun part.”
“Maybe for you. I don’t think I’m as tough. I prefer to use my feet to get around.”
“What about glass blowing?” Judy asked.
Shay shook her head. Even though her best friend was the owner and taught classes, Shay had never gone to one. “Afraid not. You’ll have to tell me how it goes.”
“You should come,” Judy said.
It was a thought she mulled over for a moment. When she moved to Red Maple Falls her intention was to rest, but it was also to step out of her comfort zone—to experience things she’d never experienced before. Somehow with the opening of the bakery, she’d fallen into a routine and that part of her dreams became a casualty to hard work and dedication.
“I wish I could, but I have to be here.”
Judy took Shay’s hand in hers and smiled up at her. “Take it from us, dear. Don’t wait too long to start going after life. Because one day you’ll realize it came and went and you missed it.”
“I won’t,” Shay said, taking their empty cups and excusing herself.
She put the mugs shaped like cupcakes into the dishwasher and wiped the counters down. She was caught up on orders for once and actually had time tonight to go do something if she really wanted to.
The only problem was there really wasn’t much to do in her little town that didn’t require a sign-up or going out into nature. Her town. Thinking the words brought a smile to her face. She’d lived in New York her whole life and never felt like she truly belonged. This town had accepted her from day one without judgement.
Her cell phone rang, and she slipped it out of her apron pocket. Mom flashed across the screen and every muscle in her body tensed.
Judy’s words echoed in Shay’s head. Don’t wait too long to start going after life. Her whole life she’d been going through the motions, doing whatever it was her mother expected of her, and trying to live up to an unrealistic expectation and for what? Moving out of New York was a defying moment for her. She finally chose how she would spend her days, where she would live and who she would associate with. Unfortunately, every time her mother called, it was like she never left.
Her mother would find some way to belittle her, offer a backhanded compliment or make her feel like a complete and total failure because she wasn’t married to some trust fund baby, jet setting around the world while her children were left to nannies.
Shay liked a simple life, which was something her mother would never understand, and she was sick and tired of trying to convince her otherwise. Still, Shay didn’t know how to break the vicious cycle. The only thing she could do was put off answering a little longer.
She ignored the call and slipped her phone back into her apron pocket, grateful for the sweet smells of her bakery.
She took a deep calming breath, finding her bearings. The Clarks stood from their table, and Shay waved to them as they headed out, wishing them luck on their newest adventure.
A few more hours and she’d be able to flip the open sign to closed and spend an evening doing whatever the hell she wanted. She had no idea what she was going to do, but she was excited anyway.
Her phone rang again in her pocket, and she deflated. She reached for it and a wave of relief rushed over her when she noticed a different, friendlier name flashing on the screen.
“Daisy, hi!” she said.
“Is this a bad time?”
“No. Not at all. What’s going on?”
“Nothing really.” Her voice lacked its usual vibrato, coming across dull and weak.
“Daisy, what’s wrong?”
When Daisy Hayes had moved to New York City, Kate had given her Shay’s number in case she’d needed someone to help her settle in. She’d called Shay a few months later, homesick, overwhelmed, and completely beaten down.
The last time Shay had seen Daisy she was four-years-old, but she was Kate and Matt’s little sister, and Shay had been happy to help. She’d dropped everything, cancelled a meeting with a client who she hadn’t cared for anyway, and taken a cab to the address Daisy had given her.
According to Kate, Daisy had been chasing her dreams of making it on Broadway and was having the time of her life while doing it. Meeting people, making connections, and having so many auditions, she had to pick and choose which ones she wanted to go for.
Shay had found a different story when she’d arrived. Daisy’s studio apartment was not in the greatest area and the place was small for one person no less the three girls that were rooming together. Her curly blonde hair had been pulled back, her shirt too baggy, and her jeans ripped at the knee. Shay had wondered when she’d last had a proper meal and why exactly did her sister think that everything was okay.
Daisy had apologized repeatedly for calling Shay. She just hadn’t had anyone to turn to, and the last thing she’d wanted to do was tell her family she was a failure. That she’d made a mistake and moving to the big city wasn’t what she had hoped for.
Shay had taken her out to dinner that night, made sure she ate until she was full, and then had enough to bring home that would hopefully last her a couple days.
After that, Shay had made a point to check on her every couple of weeks, promising herself if she didn’t see a change, she’d tell Kate even though she’d promised Daisy she wouldn’t.
Luckily, she never had to. Daisy had looked better and better every time Shay had seen her. She’d even landed a small role in an Off-Broadway play. Shay had been so proud of her, she’d taken her out to celebrate that night.
There may have been a thirteen-year age gap between the two, but Shay had never felt like she was babysitting when they had gone out together. Daisy was a good girl, and most of all, she had become a great friend. When Shay had told her she was moving back to the place Daisy left behind, there’d been a few tears shed, but Shay had known in her heart that Daisy hadn’t needed her anymore. She’d been ready to face the world on her own.
But she knew that tone in Daisy’s voice. It was familiar, sad, and broken down. Something was wrong.
“Daisy, you can talk to me. You know that.”
“I know.”
“Then talk to me.”
“I didn’t get the part.”
“Oh, sweetie, I’m so sorry.”
“I’m starting to get used to it, you know? The rejection. It stings a little in the beginning, but then I just become numb to it.”
“It’s making you stronger.”
“You always have a positive spin on things. I wish I could be like that.”
“You will. This wasn’t the one. The right part will come along, and everything will click into place. You’ll see. Give it time.”
“It’s been three years, Shay. How much more time do I have to give it? How much more time before I say screw it and head home with my tail in between my legs and admit to everyone that I’m a big epic failure?”
“You left home, a small town, the only place you’ve ever known, and moved to one of the biggest cities in the world. You have worked tirelessly toward achieving your dreams; that is not in any way an epic failure. That is honorable and amazing. You are amazing, Daze. You don’t need a stage and a spotlight to prove that.”
“Thank you. That’s why I call you. You always know exactly what to say.”
“Call me anytime. I have pep talks for days.”
“I will. Thanks again.”
“You’re welcome. Now get out of your pajamas and go for a walk.”
“How do you know I’m in my pajamas?”
“Are you?”
“Maybe,” Daisy said with a laugh, and Shay knew it was just another bump in the road. By tomorrow, Daisy would be fine, but she’d make sure to give her a call just to be sure.