CHAPTER 24

The Rehearsal

July finally arrived, and the Thursday before my wedding was the most hectic day. Mom and I were rushing around, and I was kind of stressed out. We had a lot to accomplish before we left town for the rehearsal and the wedding. I had to worry about my hair and my tan. I had had an opportunity to have hair extensions put on for free, but because of timing, I missed the window. So I was freaking out a bit, like any other bride, because I wanted my hair to be perfect. I had the actual hair extensions but no one to attach them. I found one guy who said he could do it for three hundred dollars, but that was way out of my price range. I didn’t expect it to be so challenging. Finally, after many frantic calls, I found someone who was available and who gave me a really great price.

For me, the wedding was not about the flowers, the food, or any of that. It came down to two things: One, I needed to look great. Before I got hurt I used to say all the time that I wanted to look good. I wanted it to be the same after the accident. I wanted to look as good as any other bride, knowing I would be upset if I didn’t. It wasn’t about having the perfect wedding day, but looking good still mattered. I wanted to look good enough that no one saw the wheelchair, that all anyone would say was, “What a beautiful bride.” Two, I needed Chris to be there. That was the bottom line.

Part of looking great meant that the tan and hair were integral parts of that equation. I had solved the hair problem, but the challenge of the tan was full of additional obstacles. I used to get spray tans all the time where you stand up and get sprayed. But that was when I was able-bodied. Luckily, I found a woman who would come to my home since we’d have to adjust the methodology a bit to get it done.

“Normally, we set up a tent so your home doesn’t get spray tanned, too,” she explained. “You’d stand up and I’d spray you.”

I laughed. “Obviously, I can’t stand up in the tent. We’ll have to figure something else out.”

She was so nice and not weirded out at all, which made me happy.

“I’ve seen a ton of people naked,” she said. “We’ll figure something out.”

We brainstormed a bit and decided to do it in my bedroom on the bed, with me lying down. It was a production and it took about an hour, because we had to spray and dry, spray and dry. I was flipped around, and at one point my mom had to hold up my legs one at a time so we could spray those.

In the middle of it all, Chris came home and had no idea that I was getting a spray, and no idea that there was a random person at my house in our room. He came in the bedroom and opened the door. He made the funniest face and said, “All right,” and closed the door and went downstairs.

After all of that, the tan was overly dark and I had to do a little scrubbing to lighten it up.

We had an intimate bridal shower at the wedding site, which was so nice. The wedding was being held on a dairy farm in Pittsboro, North Carolina, with a hotel on the grounds called the Fearrington House and community called Fearrington Village. There were cows in the field behind us while we got married, so you can imagine the setting. It was really country, which was what I wanted.

My shower was originally planned for the day after the bachelorette party. So I’d never had one. I wore a flowing maxi dress that was very casual. With all my extensions in, my hair was long and straight, very hippielike. The shower was in a beautiful room, set up on a terrace with windows all the way around. It was an open and elegant space with a Victorian look to the furniture. It had a big floral carpet with a large wooden table in the middle that held all the food. My mom brought a cupcake holder, and we had these hilarious drinking cups with noses drawn on the side of them. They were just plastic cups, but when you took a drink, it looked like your nose; some had mustaches, some had nose rings, and some were really big. We played a few games, such as “Who Knows the Bride Better?” and we all laughed when my mom guessed my eye color incorrectly. My eyes are hazel, and my mom wrote green. Lauren won the game. Britney was late and could come only for the rehearsal, but Samantha and Carly drove up together and made it to the lunch.

Coincidentally, all the girls matched. Lauren and Samantha were both wearing coral dresses, and Carly wore a tan dress with a coral flower in her hair, and a fifth bridesmaid I had added—a woman named Mayra who worked with Chris and had become friends with us—wore floral, too. By the time the rehearsal took place, it was a typical hot and steamy July evening.

During the rehearsal we all had a good laugh because Chris and I practiced our kiss, which I hadn’t really expected to be any kind of problem, since we’d kissed a million times before. It turned out to be the funniest part of the evening. I had no core muscles, so I couldn’t lean forward and kiss him or I’d fall right out of my chair. Carly wound up having to sort of block the chair so it wouldn’t roll backward at that very important moment. At the same time Chris had to hold my wrist to pull me toward him. He had to hold on firmly so I wouldn’t fall. I fell over a couple of times until we got the right balance. Chris caught me. Next we had to practice putting on the rings because I didn’t have finger function. He obviously put a ring on me, but I wanted to put his ring on him, too. We thought about it for a long time, trying to ensure it was meaningful. We finally came up with the solution to put his ring at the tip of my finger, then he’d connect his fingertip to mine and I’d slide it on—like a fake push from me, and he did the rest. Chris’s uncle Ron came up with that one. He was the minister performing the ceremony the next day.

After all the laughs and the rehearsal, I said goodnight to Chris. He kissed me and said, “I love you.”

I said, “I love you, too.”

He said, “I can’t wait to marry you. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

I remember thinking, Wow, this is finally happening. We were ready to be married. We had waited so long, and it was so exciting. It was fun getting his friends and my friends together and having this wonderful time that we’d never been able to have. I was thrilled that it was the last time I was going to see Chris before I could finally call him my husband.

That night, Carly, Samantha, and I all stayed together in one room. It was like a slumber party, and we had so much fun. Every time we were sort of drifting off to sleep, someone said something, like when you’re fourteen and having a sleepover with friends and someone keeps talking. It was the greatest night.