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Chapter Twelve

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Avery

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When we pulled up to the Down Under Pub, I inwardly groaned. I suddenly didn’t feel like being out tonight. Sleep tugged at me, and I just wanted to go home and curl up in my bed. I went into the bar, though, for Madison, for Garcia and Marshall. Madison desperately needed a distraction from the news that she was going to be a mother.

We took our normal table at the corner of the bar, right near the dance floor. We were all in kind of a state of shock and just simply going through the motions of a night out on the town. Garcia and Marshall were happy for Madison and her having a baby, but the unexpectedness couldn’t be ignored.

“What can I get you?” The familiar blue-eye-shadowed waitress stared back at me. Her name was Doreen. She was easily in her sixties but dressed like she was in her twenties, was widowed and super sweet. But she still looked like Mimi from The Drew Carey Show.

“Hey, Doreen, the usual. But for Madison a ginger ale.” She eyed me curiously, but as Madison’s hand instinctively found its way to her stomach, a smile formed at her lips.

“You got it, girls.” She walked away, her heels slapping loudly against the wooden dance floor. Her legs were bare underneath a short, tight black skirt, and her blue varicose veins matched her eye-shadow perfectly. It didn’t matter that her body showed the signs of her age. She wore her cute little outfits with a confidence many women would kill for.

“I’m so happy for you, Madison.” Garcia took Madison’s hand in hers.

“You’re going to be a great mom,” Marshall added. I looked between the girls. There was no doubt that she’d be a good mom. I agreed with that. I just saw it in her eyes; she was worried about telling Scott.

Doreen came back with our drinks quickly, and I hoped they would lighten the mood. She kept them coming, and I was feeling much lighter, much freer after about four beers.

“Guess who?” I smiled, watching Scott sneak up behind Madison and put his hands over her eyes.

“Scott!” Madison flew into his arms, and he caught her—barely—as they fell back and hit the wall. I knew Madison was really emotional after her news, but watching her with Scott, something I was used to, made my heart tug. I was always happy for them, for what they’d found. Watching her reaction, seeing the way he looked at her, for the first time, I wondered what it would be like if that were me.

“Babe?” He tilted her chin so her eyes were on his again. His eyes were filled with concern, but tenderness and love lay there as well. “What’s wrong?” Madison wiped the tears from her eyes.

“Not here. Later.” She hugged him again. “I missed you.”

“I missed you, too.” He looked back at me, caressing Madison’s curls as he often did. I smiled at him, trying to settle the uneasiness in the air.

“Surprise!” I yelled out, dramatically putting my hands up in the air.

“You knew?” Madison let go of Scott and turned to me.

“Of course.” She gave me a quick hug before heading back to the table. Scott and I followed, sat down and ordered another round of drinks. I needed more alcohol to ease the feelings battering me.

Scott took a sip of Madison’s drink and Garcia, Marshall, and I eyeballed each other. “Ginger ale?” he asked Madison. “Want me to grab you a hard cider?” He started to stand.

“NO!” everyone at the table yelled. He jumped at the reaction, sitting back down quickly.

“Fine. Okay!” He looked between us all. “Madison, what’s going on? Are you sick or something?”

She sighed. “Guys, Scott and I are going to head out. We have to talk.” Madison stood, taking her purse off the back of the chair. We said our good-byes and I gave her a reassuring hug.

“He loves you. Just tell him the truth,” I whispered in her ear.

Madison smiled sadly at me, the burden of the truth she carried weighing her down. It was happy news, especially for the two of them since they’re so clearly in love. But Madison, her struggles, her past still loomed around her from time to time. Each day she got stronger, and I was thankful to be a part of watching her grow.

She walked away, hand in hand with Scott and I sat back down at the table, Garcia and Marshall chatting away about something. I didn’t care what they were discussing. I just stared at my empty hand, wondering what it would be like to be held by someone the way Scott held Madison’s.

“Here’s another, sugar.” Doreen plopped another beer in my hand and I smiled.

I looked at the beer and caressed the outside of the glass. “It’s just you and me tonight.” I chugged down the beer, slamming it on the table.

“You all right?” Garcia raised her eyebrow at me. “That’s like your fifth beer.”

“And I’m going to have another.” I raised my hand to get Doreen’s attention. “It helps me forget.”

“Forget what?” Marshall asked, more concerned with her phone than with me.

“Forget that I’m alone,” I mumbled.

Garcia put her hand over mine, before dragging me and Marshall out on the dance floor.

The drinks kept coming, helping me forget all the shit that made me who I was today. I danced, laughed, and I pretended. Something I had become very skilled at, even if it led to my own unhappiness.