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“One month ago, we made a promise to one another. It was a vow, not unlike those we take when we get married. We made a commitment to one another, each and every member of the church, and though we struggled, we have made it here together,” I said. My voice was amplified by the microphone.
It had been a tough month, but I’d made it through almost clean. I’d known for years that I had a real problem when it came to gambling, and I thought for sure that I’d be able to quit for a month, but unfortunately, I didn’t make it that far. I ended up playing a few small hands of poker. Nevertheless, it was nothing major. All of my money and credit was tied up in trying fix the mess that I’d made.
“And I thank you. I thank each and every one of you for all the help and support that you have shown one another. We saw each other for what we really are, and we didn’t judge. That is the way that the Lord wants us to be.”
I surveyed the crowd. Attendance hadn’t gone up, but it hadn’t dropped anymore. It looked like we might have evened out. There was room to build from there.
“So now I ask you, are there any among you who would like to tell your story? You don’t need to go into details. Just take a minute or two and tell us what the month has been like for you.”
It wasn’t normally something I did, but the way that the spirit had been moving, I felt it was needed.
I passed the microphone around the church, assisted by some of the ushers. I’d told them before service about my plan and told them not to let anyone speak for too long.
The whole church rejoiced as we sat and listened to other people and the things that they’d been going through. Jamel Warren, our youth minister, admitted that he’d given up social media for a month. He admitted how hard it was for him, but he says it forced him to become a better person.
Sister Layla Mack spoke about how she gave up on sleeping in. She only slept as much as she needed and would wake up early before work and pray. She wanted to take more time out to be present with God.
Everything was going smoothly until they passed the mic to Tanya Bell. I’d been watching her over the past few weeks and had been trying to corner her; unfortunately, I hadn’t been able to. I’d asked Andre several times why she’d been trying to speak to him, but he’d replied that he didn’t know. I couldn’t tell if he was lying or not.
“Good morning, Pastor Stewart. Good morning, church,” Tanya said. “In giving up something I cared about, I learned to focus on the things that I cared about more. I focused on me and got back into the gym, and I became more productive at work. People have been telling me about the change they see in me, and I like it.”
She seemed proud of herself. I tried to make my face blank, but sweat was pouring from my forehead and it had nothing to do with the lights on me. I was nervous. “Thank you, Sister Bell,” I said. “Now if we could just...”
“I’m sorry, Pastor, one more thing.” A couple of church members were whispering now. I turned to my wife, and she was glaring at Tanya with a look that was mixed with interest and annoyance.
“Yes?” I asked.
She cleared her throat. “All of you knew my mother. Mother Bell was much more than just my mother, she meant a lot to all of you and vice versa. She loved the church and the people who attend NGHB and she always had a saying: nothing before the church. She always wanted the best outcome for the church and would never, ever want anything to hurt it.”
Tanya paused with the microphone still to her mouth. No whisper broke out this time around. Everyone was silent. If church folk loved one thing it was gossip, and Tanya was setting the scene for a dramatic story. I was a little nervous but still calm. There was no way she’d figured out what had happened.
“Pastor Stewart,” Tanya’s voice snapped me out of my thoughts. Her eyes were now staring directly at me. “Do you wanna tell them or should I?”