Alistair and Cosmo make the changeover at Totnes Station again but this time it’s in reverse. Cosmo is taking his bag from the car as Al comes off the platform and he can see that Cosmo is not in that ebullient mood of their last meeting. He is slightly uncomfortable, brittle.
‘Hi,’ Al says, swinging his own bag into the back of the car, giving Cosmo their usual one-arm hug. ‘I’m sorry you’re dashing off. I thought you were going to show me the sights. By now, you must know Salcombe much better than I do.’
‘I know.’ Several expressions pass over Cosmo’s face: embarrassment, apology, confusion. ‘It just seemed too good an opportunity to pass up.’
Al watches him, remembering Cosmo’s pleas for help when Becks announced her impromptu visit and the reasons that he didn’t want her there. It’s clear that the weekend Cosmo spent in London with her must have alleviated any fears she might have had, but still Al doesn’t quite trust him.
‘So how’s Amy?’ he asks casually, as Cosmo shuts the car door and hands him the keys.
Cosmo hesitates, shakes his head. ‘If you want the truth, I’m in a mess.’
For a moment he looks so confused, so desperate, that all the instincts of an old familiar friendship reassert themselves and Al feels a stab of sympathy for him.
‘What’s the problem?’ he asks, almost impatiently. ‘Are you in love with her or something? If so, why are you rushing away to Becks? Why don’t you just tell Amy the truth?’
‘Because I don’t know what the truth is,’ Cosmo almost shouts. He glances quickly round to see if anyone is watching him. ‘Sorry, mate. I know I’m behaving like a complete arsehole but I simply don’t know what to do.’
‘You mean you can’t choose between them?’
‘It’s not that simple.’ Frustrated, Cosmo thrusts his fingers through his hair. ‘It’s like I’m living in parallel universes. London and Becks. Salcombe and Amy.’
‘And you want the best of both worlds?’
Cosmo stares at him. ‘I suppose I do.’
‘And you don’t think this is unfair on Becks and Amy?’
‘Of course I see that but …’ Cosmo hesitates.
‘You’re not going to say, “But it’s OK as long as nobody is being hurt,” are you?’
‘OK. OK. But after all, if neither of them knows, then neither of them is being hurt,’ says Cosmo.
‘What about you?’ asks Al.
‘What about me?’ Cosmo looks puzzled.
‘You don’t think that lying and cheating is hurting you? Making you a lesser person? Cheapening yourself?’
Cosmo stares at him, amused and slightly affronted. ‘Not being a bit holier than thou, are we, mate?’
Al shrugs. ‘Probably. Just putting it out there. You’d better go and catch your train. See you tomorrow.’
He gets into the car, reverses out and drives away, leaving Cosmo staring after him. As he heads off up the hill Al knows that he sounded priggish and he experiences a mix of emotions: frustration, irritation, regret that he and Cosmo parted so abruptly. They’ve been mates for so long and it would be crazy to fall out over something like this. Nevertheless, Al feels very strongly about cheating. He’s seen the result of it with the breakup of two of his closest friends’ marriage. In his view, nobody wins, and irreparable damage can be done, yet what can he do about it? It’s as if some kind of spell has been cast over his old friend and Cosmo’s caught up in the magic and the rapture of it.
As he drives, Al’s mind darts to and fro, seeking for some way out of the situation. Of course, in a few weeks’ time Cosmo must return to London, but will it end the affair with Amy? And how will she feel about it? Clearly Cosmo hasn’t told her the truth so it won’t be simple for him just to walk away without hurting her. And for the life of him Al cannot imagine Cosmo settling happily in Salcombe, giving up his work, which he loves, giving up the clubs and restaurants and cinemas that are so integral to his life. Al knows that part of his own distress is that he feels responsible. If he hadn’t persuaded Cosmo to come down to Salcombe it wouldn’t have happened.
As Al drives up the track and parks the car, an idea occurs to him. Perhaps he could invent some kind of crisis, plead the need for time off work and come down here to stay. Cosmo could stay on, or go, but either way his style would be cramped. Al considers this plan, wonders if it might work. He gets his bag and goes into the house to find Reggie.
Amy sits in the Coffee Shop watching out for Cosmo. She hasn’t heard from him since yesterday afternoon and she’s excited and nervous about the party. She wonders how he will cope in this rather large group of people; whether he will feel daunted or quite cool with it. He was certainly very self-possessed with her father, and he already knows Cara. Amy hopes that Charley won’t make her feel shy about him and she is suddenly almost overwhelmed by nerves. She needs to see him come walking in, to see his smile and the confidence and vitality he always carries with him. She glances up every time the door opens but he doesn’t come and, as she sips her coffee, she feels her phone vibrate and pulls it out of her pocket.
A text from Cosmo. She opens it, reads it and then reads it again.
I’m so sorry about this. A real crisis in London. Had to dash back. I’m on the train. Be in touch xx
Amy stares at it, trying to make sense of it. A crisis – and it sounds as if he is already on the train so he must have known for a couple of hours at the very least. Why wait until now to text? Disappointment washes over her and she sits staring out into Fore Street, trying to come to terms with this sense of desolation; of being let down with a bang.
What kind of crisis could call him back so suddenly? He doesn’t mention family or work? And why such short notice? She wonders what’s happened to Reggie. Worse than all of these, she wonders how she’ll explain to everyone why Cosmo won’t be at the party. Even as she sits there, miserable, hurt, and cross, the door opens and Sam Chadwick walks in. He glances round, sees her and raises his hand in greeting. He hesitates, clearly wondering if it’s OK to join her, and with a huge effort she smiles back at him and makes a welcome gesture. As he orders his coffee, she’s rehearsing what she might say should he mention Cosmo. She remembers how well Sam got on with Charley at their last meeting, that he’s going into the navy, and hopes that she can deflect him from any awkward questions by talking about it. Nevertheless she needs to prepare what she’s going to tell everyone so it’s no good shirking it. Amy drops her shoulders, takes a breath.
‘Hi,’ she says brightly. ‘How’re you doing? Getting ready to party?’
Sam sits down, laughs at the question.
‘I certainly am. It was great fun last time. Thanks for inviting me over.’
She’s such a pretty girl; so vivid and confident. Yet as he looks at her, he notices something rather febrile about her, a slight lack of poise that shows a vulnerability. He wonders if she’s anxious that the evening at the pub might not go so well as that last lunch did; that it’s important her father enjoys his party.
‘I think it’s such a good idea to go to the pub,’ he says rather randomly. ‘Not so much pressure. It’s a kind of shared responsibility, isn’t it?’
He can tell by her faintly puzzled expression that this is not what is worrying her, and he feels a bit of a fool, but he doesn’t let himself get fazed.
‘Cara was telling me earlier that her big horror is organizing parties. They always had staff to do it for them at the embassies, of course, but even so, there’s quite a lot to oversee. I was just wondering if you might be having last-minute cold feet.’
She smiles then, gratefully, as if she thinks it’s nice of him to be concerned.
‘I think the whole thing will run itself,’ she says. ‘Especially as we’ve done it before and we all know each other …’
She trails off, biting her lip, as if she’s said something she regrets but he can’t think what it might be. Everyone knows each other, even if only slightly – and then he remembers that Cara told him that this guy Amy is seeing, Cosmo, is coming to the party. He wonders if this is making her feel a bit shy at the thought of them all sizing him up, but before he can speak his coffee arrives. The girl who brings it pauses to chat to Amy and Sam leans back, wondering how to proceed.
After the girl goes back to the counter, Amy sits forward and picks up her cup. She’s frowning, as if she’s coming to a decision, and then suddenly she speaks out.
‘To be really honest with you, Sam, I’m feeling a bit upset. I don’t know if anyone’s told you that I invited this guy I’ve met to Dad’s party? His name’s Cosmo and he’s house-and-dog-sitting for friends for a couple of months or so in Batson Creek. We’ve got to know each other and … Well, Dad wanted to meet him so I invited him and everything was great. And now I’ve just had a text saying he’s had to rush back to London. Just that. No explanation. I mean, it’s so embarrassing. Everyone is kind of sitting round waiting to meet him, teasing me about him, and what will I say?’
Sam is taken aback by this unexpected confession and he can see that she is both angry and hurt, and very embarrassed. He casts about for some comforting answer that is in no way patronizing or diminishes her reaction.
‘That’s tough,’ he agrees. ‘I suppose it must have been a pretty big disaster to make him go rushing off. But surely everyone will get that, won’t they? I mean it’s not your fault, is it?’
‘No,’ she agrees, rather reluctantly, ‘but it’s embarrassing that he doesn’t say what it is so I have no real explanation. It’s just weird that one minute it’s all on and the next he’s on the train to London without any warning.’
Sam can see that it’s costing her to tell him all this, to take him into her confidence and expose her embarrassment to him. He longs to help her.
‘Look,’ he says, ‘let’s not make a big deal out of this. OK, so Cosmo hasn’t given you an explanation. Maybe it’s just too complicated to do it by text. If it’s some kind of emergency he might not be thinking straight. Meanwhile nobody is going to be that shocked, are they? If you like, I can tell Cara. And Max and Judith, too. Just in a casual kind of way. You can tell your father. Who else is there?’
‘Charley,’ says Amy.
She says the name rather sulkily, as if her old friend is the person she is worrying about most. Sam can understand this. Charley is the kind of woman who might very well tease and joke about it. He wonders if Amy has talked to Charley about Cosmo, opened up to her, and now it will be embarrassing to tell her that he’s gone off to London with no explanation.
‘You’ll have to tough it out,’ he says firmly. ‘Tell your dad as soon as you can and then Charley will be the only one you need to worry about and there will be too many of us around for her to be much of a problem.’
She stares at him in surprise and with a certain amount of admiration.
‘Thanks,’ she says at last. ‘I guess that’s the way to do it. If you’ll tell the others and I tell Dad it won’t be a kind of public announcement. Everyone will know beforehand.’
‘You’ll be fine,’ he assures her. ‘And I’ll keep an eye on Charley.’
Amy begins to laugh. ‘I can see why everyone says you’ve been chosen to be a leader of men. Your talents would be wasted elsewhere. I shall count on you to have my back.’
He’s taken aback by her words. Is that really how people see him? He raises his coffee cup to her.
‘It’ll be fine,’ he tells her. ‘You’re in control. Remember that.’
She clinks her cup against his and smiles at him.
‘Thanks, Sam,’ she says.
He smiles back at her, thinking that Cosmo is a lucky man, and hoping for his sake that he’s got a really good reason for standing her up.
Jack comes in and pauses beside them.
‘Thought you’d be here,’ he says to Amy, ‘but I thought that Cosmo would be with you, not this young warrior.’
‘He’s had to go back to London,’ Amy says casually. ‘Some kind of emergency.’ She shrugs, almost indifferently. ‘Says he’s really sorry.’
‘Yeah?’ says Jack, disbelievingly. ‘Just couldn’t face being outnumbered. Ah, well. We’ll manage without him.’
He grins at Amy and goes to order his coffee. Sam and Amy stare at each other. Sam gives a kind of ‘told you so’ shrug.
‘You see? It won’t be a big deal if you don’t want it to be,’ he tells her. ‘You were really casual the way you told him. He took his lead from you. It’ll be fine.’
She shakes her head, as if in surprise. ‘I guess you’re right.’ She grins at him. ‘Just be sure you sit next to me for supper.’
He is filled with delight at the prospect. ‘You’re on,’ he says.
Jack waits in the queue. He feels relieved that Cosmo won’t be joining them at the pub this evening. Though he likes the lad it might have been less relaxed, more formal, with a stranger in their midst. He glances back at Sam and Amy, who seem to be toasting each other with their coffee cups, and he smiles to himself. He’d much rather see her with Sam than with Cosmo. Somehow, though he couldn’t have explained why, Sam seems to fit in better with them all. Cosmo is almost overconfident, smooth, showy. Sam is quietly strong; at ease in his skin, self-reliant. Jack would rather his girl was attracted to that kind of man than to Cosmo’s extrovert liveliness. But then again, who could tell what might attract a woman to a man or, for that matter, a man to a woman? He could never quite see what chemistry worked between Max and Judith, for instance. She’s so buttoned up, so proper, as if she needs to protect herself from ordinary people. Whilst old Max is such a hail-fellow-well-met kind of guy. Jack slightly wishes that Judith wasn’t coming to the party either – fears that she might put a blight on it – but he hopes that there will be too many of them for it to have any real effect. He intends to enjoy himself. He’s glad that Amy doesn’t seem too worried by Cosmo’s sudden departure, wonders what’s happened to make him back out, and rather hopes that it keeps him away for a while.
He orders his Americano and turns back to join Amy and Sam. He has every intention of enjoying his birthday. They’ve already pulled up a chair for him and, as he sits down, the door opens and Cara and Max come in. Everyone begins to laugh.
‘You’ve started early,’ says Max. ‘Happy birthday, Jack. May we join you?’
‘Why wait till this evening?’ asks Jack, pulling two tables together so that they can all fit round. ‘Let’s do the show right here.’
Amy is laughing. She looks relaxed and cheerful. Sam is watching her with an odd, almost protective look, and Jack feels another surge of affection for him.
‘Get the order in, Sam,’ Jack says. ‘I bet you know what everyone wants by now. And I’ll have a piece of that tiffin. It’s my birthday, after all.’
‘Aye aye, sir.’
Grinning, Sam gives him a mock salute and gets to his feet. He checks with Max and Cara, raises his eyebrows towards Amy’s empty cup. She shakes her head and then just as suddenly changes her mind.
‘Why not?’
Another little look passes between the two of them and Jack is intrigued, but Max is explaining why Judith isn’t with them, and Cara pauses before she sits down to give him a birthday hug, and he forgets about it.
Pleased though he is to see his friends, Max is slightly irritated not to be able to have a quiet word with Cara about Judith’s new plan to move to Oxford. He didn’t want open discussion – not yet – but he wondered if he might just moot the idea to Cara in the privacy of the Coffee Shop so as to give her a warning shot across the bows. He hadn’t expected to see Jack and Amy with Sam already here, and now the opportunity is gone. His anxiety is that Cara might somehow imagine that she ought to take up Judith’s proposition so as to help them; to enable the move. He can imagine how Judith will cleverly emphasize the benefits of his being able to keep his boat, of the fun they’ll have together when he comes down to see Cara and all his friends. Cara knows how he loves his boat, how much he would miss his life here in Salcombe, and she might feel pressured to help him. He wants to assure her that this is not necessary.
Now, as he watches her talking and laughing, he can see that it might be the right thing for her to stay here, amongst this friendly group of people, but not in a large, expensive house that would not necessarily be her choice. Max wonders how she will react to the news that he might be going to Oxford. He knows that it will be a shock – that she believes he and Judith are settled here – and he feels cross and sad that he doesn’t know what is best for his sister. It would be crazy to suggest that she should come to Oxford with them, and Judith certainly wouldn’t be pleased. He can’t see a way through it and feels frustrated and angry.
Sam sits down beside him and Max turns to him, glad to be distracted.
‘We looked for you earlier,’ he tells him. ‘Just to say we were going to do some shopping and then pop in here, but you were nowhere to be found.’
‘I went out for a walk,’ says Sam. ‘Just getting my bearings. So many little streets and passages. The thing is, I just want to check with you if it’s OK if I whisk Cara off to The Keep for a few days? Seems a bit rude, pinching your guest, but Hal and Fliss asked me to invite her over so she can meet Jolyon and Henrietta and the kids. I think I mentioned they’re down for the weekend.’
‘I think it’s a great idea,’ answers Max, ‘and I’m sure she’d love to. I think that she’ll be around for a while yet so there’s no need to worry about poaching.’
‘Great,’ says Sam. ‘And we can do a bit more exploring. I’d like to take her up on to the moor. Though I can’t quite see her wanting to live up there.’
Max wonders what Sam would say if he were to tell him that Judith is planning a move to Oxford and that she thinks Cara should buy the house in Buckley Street. Suddenly he is filled with an odd sense of desolation. He loves both his boys but Paul is an academic, wrapped up in his research work, and they have very little in common. Chris, on the other hand, loves to come here to Salcombe, to sail with his father and have a drink with his friends. These visits are so precious to Max. Sam is watching him: he looks concerned.
‘Are you OK?’ he asks.
Max pulls himself together. ‘Of course I am.’
He suddenly realizes that Sam seems to have lost the air of preoccupation, his introspective look. He’s relaxed, happy, and Max wonders what has happened to bring about the change. Instinctively he glances at Amy, who is talking animatedly to Cara.
‘So I hear we are to be meeting Cosmo this evening,’ he says. ‘How serious is it? Do you know?’
‘Oh, Cosmo can’t come,’ answers Sam casually. ‘Some crisis has called him back to London. We’ll have to do without him, I’m afraid.’
‘Well, Amy doesn’t look too bothered,’ observes Max.
He watches Sam look across at her, notes the expression on his face and wonders if he’s found the answer to his earlier question.
‘No she doesn’t, does she?’ answers Sam. He grins at his godfather. ‘We’ll just have to make sure she doesn’t miss him.’
Max bursts out laughing.
‘I think you might find that Jack will be glad to encourage you in that endeavour,’ he says.
More coffee arrives, the tiffin is shared around, and Max prepares to put his problems to one side and celebrate his old friend’s birthday.
Cara raises her cup to Jack and smiles at Amy, wondering how Cosmo will fit in with this group of friends.
As if she is reading her thoughts, Amy says casually: ‘Oh, by the way, Cosmo can’t come tonight. Some emergency has come up and he’s had to go back to London.’
Amy looks quite calm, unfazed, but Cara feels a little tug of anxiety. Something makes her want to say: ‘That’s convenient timing, isn’t it?’ but she has no reason to believe that Cosmo wants to avoid an evening with Amy’s family and friends. Yet instinct tells her that all is not well. She likes Amy: she’s so straightforward, so easy to be with, and she’s such a pretty girl. Cara remembers how she met Cosmo out at Snapes Point on his last return from London.
‘What’s he done with the dog?’ she asks casually.
Amy shrugs. ‘Don’t know. Maybe his friend’s down again. Al, his name is. His parents own the house. And Reggie.’
‘Is Cosmo coming back?’
Just for a moment, Amy looks slightly disconcerted. She frowns, then shrugs again.
‘He didn’t say in his text,’ she answers. ‘I should think so.’
It seems rather odd that Amy isn’t very well informed but Cara is pleased to see a measure of indifference. Even if Amy is hurt or worried she isn’t going to allow it to show. Cara remembers how they looked together, so much in love, so absorbed in each other, and she can’t quite dismiss her fear.
Jack is offering her some tiffin, coffee is put in front of her. She smiles at him and she glances up again at the beam, remembering how she felt when she first saw Cosmo, how he pointed out the words ‘Dolce far Niente’ and how he reminded her of Joe.
As she picks up the piece of tiffin, Sam slides into the chair opposite and smiles at her.
‘You’ve got permission for a run ashore,’ he tells her. ‘How about we go to The Keep tomorrow to be in time for lunch? Shall I phone Fliss and ask her?’
‘Yes,’ she says. ‘Yes, please.’
As Amy asks Sam about his family, Cara thinks that it will be good to go back to The Keep, to be with Fliss and Hal and Honey in that wonderful old house. She remembers how she and Fliss sat in the courtyard with Honey between them, and how Fliss talked about Mole and their older brother, Jamie, and how their deaths had affected her. These confidences were unexpected – Cara guesses that Fliss is not a woman who readily bares her soul – yet it seemed so right, as if The Keep’s high walls were sheltering them both in this special moment of intimacy. It made her feel privileged and less alone.
Everyone is raising their coffee cups to Jack, toasting him, and Cara finishes her tiffin and joins in.