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Cyn had missed her sister so much, she realised as she laughed at Lillian’s animated romantic melodrama.
“It was a bloody mess,” Lillian concluded, thudding her beer glass against the sticky wooden countertop of the bar. Some ale slopped over the edge and dripped down the glass.
“I bet,” Cyn said, taking a long pull on her own glass.
The ale washed down her throat and into her stomach, making her full and slightly tipsy. She and Lillian had been sitting at a pub for over an hour, catching up. Mostly, Lillian was telling her about a date she’d had with her boyfriend, Victor. They’d only been together for a short while, and she was complaining about him acting odd on their date. Poor bloke was nervous as hell, and Lillian couldn’t figure out why. It had made their entire evening awkward. Secretly, she tired of hearing about Lillian and Victor’s madly-in-love bullshite drama, but it seemed so much safer than letting Fallon slip into her thoughts.
“He was weird afterward, too,” Lillian said. “He kept fidgeting with his hands in his pockets, trying to say something, and then I’d say ‘what’ and he’d shake his head and say ‘nothing’... Mum thinks he’s about to propose.”
Cyn’s eyes widened. “Oh my God. Do you want to marry him?”
“Yes,” Lillian said, blushing. “We’ve only been together for a short time, but things are so good, it seems like, why wait? D’you know what I mean?”
“Of course.”
Cyn was lying. She couldn’t comprehend dating someone and suddenly wanting to get married. But then again, she could barely comprehend someone sticking around after the first few shags.
“What does Mum think? She thinks it’s too soon, right?”
Lillian pulled a face. “It’s not like that. If things work like this, why should we wait? Mum seems happy about it, but then again she could be desperate for grandkids.”
“But if you love him, why not give it some time? What’s the big hurry?” Cyn asked, slurring a bit. She set down her glass and motioned at the bartender for another refill.
Lillian smiled. “Try and be happy for me, won’t you? Maybe I’m the marrying type. We used to play brides when we were kids. When did you change your mind about it?”
Cyn waved a hand dismissively, but didn’t answer. No need to share her cynicism with her sister.
Lillian changed the subject. “So what new blokes have tumbled in and out of your life since we last talked? Did you have a good holiday?”
“It was nice,” Cyn said, downing another swallow of ale. “Not a lot of variety, though.”
She forced herself to grimace. She’d fallen in love with the place, and the people, and walked away from a man who she wouldn’t mind waking up next to every damn day.
“So you did get a shag, then?”
Cyn flushed at the image of Fallon gently licking between her legs which flooded into her brain from out of nowhere. She fanned herself with one of the menus, straightening on her stool.
“I did,” she said.
Lillian raised an eyebrow at her sister, clearly interested. “Want to tell me about it? You know Victor’s the only one I’ve ever been with. You have to tell me. I live through you, y’know.”
Her sister had managed to keep her virginity firmly intact until after she’d graduated university. Unless Lillian had kept a drawer stocked full of battery-operated boyfriends, Cyn didn’t know how she’d held out until Victor.
“He was older than me. And he’s bloody dishy. Nice tan, dark hair, dark eyes.”
“He sounds sexy,” Lillian said, taking a drink. “What’s his name?”
A lump formed in her throat. “Fallon... Fallon O’Leary.”
“That’s a sexy Irish name.” Lillian said with a smirk.
Cyn rolled her eyes. “Oh, he’s definitely fit.”
“So are you going to see him again? Doesn’t he live in the middle of nowhere?”
Her eyes darkened. “He, does and I don’t know what’s going to happen. We’re going to... Skype.”
Cyn flushed, thinking of the portal. The ale was going to her head, and woozy warmth spread through her limbs. She wanted to be on Fallon’s lap, with his strong arms wrapped around her while they were making out. A tingle started between her legs, and Cyn shifted on her barstool, trying to get comfortable. The image of Fallon standing behind her, caressing her breasts and nipples while kissing her neck, filled her brain. Her mouth twitched.
Lillian eyed her suspiciously. “You all right?”
“Fine,” she said.
Cyn was way too warm. She coughed. Bloody hell, Lillian better not catch on.
“I’m going to the loo,” Lillian said, standing up and stretching. “You order another round while I’m gone?”
Cyn nodded, turning around to the bar. The ale glass was sweating in her hands. As much as she tried to clear her mind, she couldn’t stop thinking about Fallon. She wondered what he was doing. She wondered if he missed her, or if he could take another mate. Stallions mate for life, and maybe it wasn’t possible for him to move on, but the thought still stung. Hard. With a pang, she remembered lying in bed with Fallon after making love. He’d always held her. She’d never been much of a cuddler, but she couldn’t deny how safe and warm it was in his arms. Listening to his heartbeat always soothed her. In fact, trying to sleep without him was torture. Cyn swallowed, her skin still feeling hot. She reached up, unfastened her black cardigan, and draped it over the pub stool. The air was cool on her exposed arms and shoulders, but she couldn’t shake the warm flush from all the alcohol. Her head throbbed. Suddenly, she wanted to go home and lay down. Being out with Lillian was tiring. I’m probably just not used to being home, she thought unhappily, finishing the last of her glass.
The bartender brought over two refills and eyed Cyn’s ample cleavage. “Those two blokes over there wanted me to send you and your friend a drink. What d’you say, love?”
“No, thank you,” Cyn said, shaking her head. “But I’ll take another round for us.”
“Suit yourself.” He grabbed the empty glasses and turned around, busying himself at the bar.
Cyn was unpleasantly reminded of the time with Felicity at the pub on the Aran Islands, when they’d first seen Niall and Tomas. Her heart sank, thinking of how she’d tried to flirt with Tomas and misunderstood the situation so badly. Cyn was mortified when she discovered that not only was he mated, he was deeply in love with his mate. She’d seen them at the bonfire, dancing together and gazing into each other’s eyes.
She was no longer her flirty self. Cyn couldn’t pinpoint what had changed, but it didn’t seem fun anymore to pick up blokes for a night. Not when she’d experienced something deeper. Her stomach clenched.
Lillian returned, hopping onto her stool. “What’d I miss? Say, those blokes in the corner are staring at you, Miss Model.”
Cyn frowned and took another drink of ale.
“D’you feel alright?”
“Yeah.” Bloody lie that it was, she stretched in an effort to shake off some of the booze. “They tried to send over a drink, but I didn’t really feel right accepting.”
Lillian gaped. “Okay, who are you and what have you done with my sister? Seriously, what’s gotten into you? You’re like a complete stranger.”
Cyn sighed. “Didn’t you say Victor might pop the question? I wouldn’t say it was right for someone in your position to let a bloke buy her a drink.”
Lillian shrugged. “I’m sorry, Cyn. It’s just, you’ve never had a problem with it before. And I can’t figure out what’s changed.”
“A lot,” Cyn muttered.
Two men around Cyn’s age stood up from a table in the corner and walked over. With dismay, Cyn saw they were both smiling at her, cocky, anticipating the chase. She turned away, ignoring them.
“Hello,” said the one on the right, with a smile directed at Cyn.
His light brown hair was tousled from the rain, and he wore a fisherman’s sweater. It seemed weird to be around people wearing modern clothes again, too. She’d grown to love the way Fallon’s backside looked in a tunic. She wasn’t interested in this bloke at all.
“Hi,” she said cagily, turning back to the bar.
The bloke stepped to the side, where there was an empty seat next to her, but thankfully he didn’t sit down.
“I was hoping you might join me and my mate here for a round or two,” he said.
Cyn’s throat closed in a vise, and she shook her head. “Sorry. Not tonight.”
“All right,” he said, sounding dejected. To his friend, he said: “Looks like we’ll have to find us some girls who want to have fun.” When that still didn’t get Cyn’s attention, they both grumbled and walked away, sitting back down at their table. Relief washed over her, despite Lillian’s stare.
“You’ve gone barking mad,” Lillian muttered, digging through her purse for some change. “I’ve got to get home. Victor’s going to wonder where I am. I hope you’ll be feeling a bit more cheery the next time we decide to make a go of it.”
Cyn sighed. “I’m sorry, I know I haven’t been great company. I’m just tired.”
“I don’t think that’s true,” Lillian said as she shrugged on her coat. “You disappear for weeks, and now you’re back, moping around. If I didn’t know better, I’d say your game finally caught up to you and some bloke broke your heart.”
“I’ll be fine. See you later, sis.”
Lillian’s expression softened, and she leaned down for a hug. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be so harsh. I’m just worried, love.”
She kissed Cyn on the cheek and strode out of the bar. Alone, Cyn hunched over her ale. She gazed out the window, longing for the lush greenery of the Realm. Would she ever see Fallon again?
# # #
