Rick greeted Lisa as she entered the deli. Her comfort with Rick and desire to demonstrate her gratitude for the employment opportunity made the process of shadowing the young woman, Maggie, whose place she was to assume, easier than expected.
The lunch rush was overwhelming and Lisa was impressed by her young mentor’s ability to please the customers.
“Hey, I’m on break. I’ve only got an hour.” One customer’s demanding attitude would have sent Lisa running for cover. Maggie only smiled, cool and calm. “I completely understand, sir, and will make sure the kitchen gets your food out in a hurry.” When a group of four women, all dressed in finely tailored suits took their seats, Maggie’s familiarity with the clientele impressed. “Hello. It’s great to see you all here. We’ve missed you.”
“Just back from a buying trip. We missed Rick’s cooking,” one of the women responded.
“I’m so glad you came.” Maggie smiled warmly at the group. “Let me see if I have this right, two diet colas and two coffees, with milk, not cream, on the side, to start.”
All the women nodded. “One hundred percent as always.”
Lisa quickly learned the keys to being a successful waitress at the deli were to be polite, willing to chat with the customers, and most of all staying calm under all circumstances. By two thirty, the restaurant had quieted. Maggie, still smiling, was showing Lisa how to post receipts in the register, and Lisa’s feet felt like they were on fire.
During her mid-afternoon break, Rick nodded toward a table in the rear of the restaurant. “Come on, sweetheart. Sit down with me. You look like you could use a break, and I’d love to talk with someone who remembers further back than a decade.”
Lisa gratefully accepted his offer. She knew she was in good shape, but the moment she sat down she felt her feet swelling in her shoes. “How long have you been running these businesses?”
Rick laughed. “Forever. Probably as long as you’ve been an adult.”
Thinking about all the turns in her life over the previous week, Lisa smiled. “I’m still working on becoming an adult.”
He chuckled. “Yeah, aren’t we all?”
“Do you have a family?” she asked.
“You’re looking at them, lovely lady. The kids who come here, and the ones who work for me at the club, they’re my family.”
“Haven’t you ever wanted a family of your own; a relationship of your own?” As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she realized how foolish the question was.
Rick smiled as though reading her mind. “My dear, everyone wants to meet their one and only. I had mine. There’ll never be another.”
“You broke up?”
“He died.”
Lisa lowered her head, staring into her cup. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “Was it AIDS?”
Rick laughed. “Oh, you are such a straight girl. Not every gay man dies of AIDS. Although, for my generation that’s not an outlandish question.”
Blushing, Lisa apologized. “You’re right. That was a short-sighted assumption on my part.”
“Many people who come from white-bread suburban backgrounds think the way you do. Actually, Greg died from lung cancer. Smoked like a chimney and he paid the price. Strangely enough, with all the secondhand smoke I’ve inhaled over the years, my lungs are as clean as a whistle.” Rick took a long gulp of his coffee.
“I’m glad you’re healthy.” Lisa placed her hand gently on Rick’s. “I want to thank you so much for helping me. I won’t need to be paid under the table for long.”
“Planning on revealing the location of the Bat Cave?”
“Soon. I need to see my lawyer tomorrow morning about starting divorce proceedings.”
“You’re still married? And here I thought you were already a free agent.”
Lisa shook her head. “I wish.”
“Now you’ve piqued my curiosity. I could have sworn I saw sparks between you and my beloved Gigi. Was I wrong?”
Blushing, Lisa said, “It surprised me. I’d never…I don’t know if—”
“Bisexuals do exist, my dear. Not everyone in the gay and lesbian community is all or nothing. In fact, many of us wish we could be straight. It would have made our lives so much simpler.”
“I bet.” Lisa rested her head in her hands. “I’m just so confused. How could I not know whether or not I’m bisexual all these years?”
He shrugged. “Honey, we’re all raised to be straight. If you’re bi, and you have a good man, why would you keep looking? And if all you’ve ever been taught that it’s expected that you belong with a man, then that’s what you’ll end up with. I’ll bet you never even knew what lesbians were before you went to college, and I’ll bet the ones you met made you just a little bit nervous.”
Blushing, Lisa nodded.
“Denial is a powerful emotion. My guess is, once you’ve allowed yourself to feel as well as think…you’ll come to accept what I imagine is the inevitable.”
“That I have the hots for Gigi.”
Rick threw his head back and laughed out loud. “I certainly hope Gigi knows how you feel.”
Lisa quickly cast her eyes toward the table and took a sip of her coffee.
“I see. You showed her?”
“And then I ran…but I think we were able to come to terms we could both live with, for now. I can’t even lead her on until I know where I’m going.”
“I’m glad to hear it.” Rick looked toward the entrance to the deli. “It looks like we’re getting the mid-afternoon snack crowd.”
“I guess I’d better get back to work.”
“After which I’d strongly suggest you get that divorce before your husband finds out about Gigi and accuses you of being a deviant.” Rick winked.
Lisa hadn’t thought about Robert using that against her. But how could he possibly know? “Oh, by the way, I’d like to meet with him tomorrow, after I talk to my attorney. I’ll work around the hours you want me here.”
“Why don’t I free up your day? You can come to work during the dinner rush. That will be a good experience for you to have before you solo. Once you’re here on your own, I’ll need some advance notice if you need to take a day off.”
“Of course. Thank you. Will five tomorrow be all right?”
“Sure. But be ready to hustle, the place fills up fast.”
“I’ll be here,” she promised. Lisa took her order pad and got down to business with Maggie. It was amusing to have a mentor young enough to be friends with Kelly, but she had a lot to learn.
On the way home from work, Lisa contacted Robert and arranged to meet him at eleven thirty the next morning. She then called Jim and told him she’d be at his office promptly at nine o’clock. What a relief to know the wheels were finally in motion! Humming away to herself, Lisa returned to the brownstone with a chicken salad sandwich from the deli. She took a shower to wash off the greasy aroma of French fries and onion rings, and changed into jeans and a fitted, long-sleeved white T-shirt. Lisa took a moment to gaze at herself in the mirror, pleased with the way the simple outfit accentuated her figure without being too obvious. She felt like a teenager again, looking forward to an evening sure to be filled with fun and laughter.
Lisa relaxed in her apartment before heading out for the evening, eating her sandwich with the television as company. Not long after she finished her dinner, she heard a knock on her door. “Who is it?”
“Jeff.”
Lisa opened the door. “Hi, what can I do for you?”
“I’d actually like to know if I can do something for you.”
Jeff might have been in his twenties, but in many ways he reminded her of the sweetest side of Chris. “And what would that be?”
“How about if I escort you to the club, if you’re planning on going there tonight? It looks like Giselle is staying in and painting all evening to make up for last night.”
Lisa grinned. “Do you always escort people to Rick’s?”
“Only my friends and roomies.”
“You’re terrific. I’d love an escort. I feel like dancing and letting loose before tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” Jeff was confused.
“It’s nothing. Cleaning up some old business.”
Jeff was polite enough not to pry. “Well then, honey, let’s go; and promise you’ll let me know if you’re heading out alone when you’re ready to leave.”
“You’re a one-man security team.”
“I’ve seen what can happen when one of us isn’t careful. It’s better to face reality before reality drags you into an alley and beats the crap out of you.”
Lisa shivered. “I promise, no solo strolls late at night. Did Gigi tell you to keep an eye on me?”
Jeff grinned back. “Maybe yes, maybe no.”
Lisa smiled and shook her head. Someone cared enough to worry about her and want to keep her safe. When was the last time Robert had thought about anything but his own pleasure and money?
They quickly walked to the club, encouraged by an unexpected chill in the air. When they entered, Jeff took his place behind the bar, mixing drinks and flirting with the patrons. Lisa hopped on a bar stool, ordered a glass of wine, and watched the dance floor slowly fill.
Within twenty minutes she joined a group of five other women who were dancing. She was just one anonymous woman in the crowd, dancing and having fun. It reminded her of the week of freedom in South Beach.
Lisa lost herself in the DJ’s selections, the lights, and the heat coming off the people dancing around her. Some of the women reached out to brush their fingers over Lisa’s arms and shoulders. At first she stepped back, somewhat hesitant, yet was soon carried away by the atmosphere and let the women get closer. The touch of eager fingers, coupled with the rhythm of the music, added to her sense of exhilaration. It felt good to be the object of desire. After dancing to a few songs, she returned to the bar for another glass of wine and watched couples pair off for a slow number.
“Hey, you looked great out there.”
Lisa was startled and then laughed when she saw Gigi standing beside her. “I thought you weren’t going out tonight?”
“I wasn’t, but Giselle finished the painting. I figured why not treat myself to a little fun.” Gigi rested a hand on Lisa’s shoulder.
“You finished, that’s wonderful!” Lisa got off the bar stool and gave Gigi a quick hug.
Gigi slid onto the stool next to hers. “So, Lisa, have you been having fun?”
“I danced a little, I drank a little, and yes, I’m having fun. Maybe not as much as last night.” Lisa smiled warmly. “But I really feel comfortable here, even though I barely know the place or the people.”
“Some things are like that—meant to be.”
“Do you believe in fate?”
“I believe in something, and ‘fate’ might as well be its name.”
“Do you want to join me for a drink?”
“I believe I will.” Gigi waved to Jeff, who brought her a Manhattan. As they sat sipping their drinks and watching the dancers, Lisa realized she had become part of a couple paired off for the night. She couldn’t remember a time she’d felt so relaxed in her surroundings, other than when she was with her children. Being with Gigi was as easy as spending time with Chris and Kelly.
“Do you want to dance some more?”
“No, you go ahead. I’m enjoying just watching right now.”
Gigi got off the bar stool, squeezed Lisa’s hand, and smiled. “Suit yourself, I’m just warming up.”
Picking up her drink, Lisa took a sip and indulged herself with people watching.
* * * *
While Lisa was immersed in watching her fellow dancers, including two of the waiters from Rick’s deli, someone new had walked into the club. From a distance she noticed him glancing in her direction but thought nothing of it and continued to dance.
The man slowly approached the bar. Rick worked his way down until he was standing in front of the new customer.
Lisa was surprised as she saw Rick starting to pour a beer for the man. As the owner, he spent his time mingling with the customers, but rarely served the drinks. At first Lisa assumed this was a special guest or friend until she noticed a frown spread across Rick’s face. As their conversation continued, Rick looked directly at Lisa and then back at the man on the stool, his face continuing to reveal his displeasure despite the ongoing interaction. Too curious to let this go on any further, Lisa approached the bar.
Stopping briefly at the stool where she had left her jacket earlier, Lisa heard Rick’s voice. It wasn’t the warm, welcoming tone she had grown familiar with so quickly.
“Appearances can be deceiving. Maybe she’s not who you think she is. Are you everything you appear to be? Are any of us?” Rick smiled.
“I guess I’ll have to see if it’s my angel.”
That voice sounded familiar. Lisa circled around to see who it was, surprised when Rick said, his voice hard, “Maybe it’s for the best if you leave.”
“I’ll be just a minute.”
The stranger turned on his stool and Lisa gasped.
“Hey, it is you.” He smiled broadly.
“Oh my God!”
“I knew it. I knew I’d somehow meet up with you again. I’m just glad it was sooner rather than later.” He smiled broadly.
“Mark! Is it really you? What are you doing here?”
“Same as you, looking for love in the strangest places it seems. I’m here on business, I have the night free, and I was just wandering around, exploring a different area of the city. Interesting clientele, I must say.” Both of them laughed. Sensing she was being watched, Lisa turned toward the far end of the bar where she had been sitting. Rick and Jeff looked at her stony-faced, as did Gigi who had left the dance floor to join her two friends.
Ordering them each a drink, Mark smiled broadly. “I guess we were meant to be more than strangers on a train.” He seemed happy to open up about himself, sharing more intimate details of his life. Mark apparently had a studio apartment in SoHo since he did a lot of business in New York City. Lisa enjoyed listening to him describe some of his favorite museums and shops to visit when in Manhattan.
“My real home is in Philadelphia. The company has me traveling up and down the East Coast continually, so I thought it would be prudent to have a place in New York, especially since a few days in a hotel can be more expensive than a month’s rent for an apartment.”
“Are you in the city that often?”
“At least twice a month. The company helps to subsidize the rent and I get to be completely comfortable in one of the greatest cities in the world. My employer’s grateful that I’m not constantly submitting expensive hotel and restaurant bills.”
“It must be nice to have a place to feel so relaxed when you’re not at home.”
“You can’t imagine.”
While Lisa was still not quite ready to reveal her own background to Mark, she found his companionship enjoyable, and was happy to see him again at a time when she didn’t feel quite so distraught. Although the memory of that night only brought her cheer, and made her feel a bit naughty as well, Lisa still felt the need to keep her true identity a secret from this man. Confiding in Gigi had seemed so natural. She remained Lori with Mark.
Mark offered to walk Lisa home from the nightclub, and she willingly took him up on it. He gave her another of his business cards, scrawling his personal cell number on the back.
Outside the door of the brownstone, they kissed like high school students ending a first date. Lisa pushed back slightly when their lips parted, feeling somewhat awkward.
“I’m not going to invite you in,” she said. “Not tonight.”
“That’s okay, but I don’t plan to let you disappear again. We must have bumped into each other for a reason.”
“Maybe because we both like good drinks and good music and Rick’s offers both.”
Mark laughed. “Maybe, but I don’t usually go there. It’s not a typical place where I could meet someone I might be interested in.”
“You mean a heterosexual woman?”
“Exactly. But for some reason I chose to go there tonight and there you were, waiting to be found. I believe in fate.” Mark grinned.
“I’ll keep your card this time.”
“Good. Please call me. Better yet—” Mark fumbled in his pocket and pulled out another card and turned it over. He wrote “Lori.” “Now, what’s your number? If I don’t hear from you, I’ll call you.”
It felt good to be pursued, desired. She took the pen Mark offered and, turning the card over, wrote her phone number on the back, then handed it back to him. “Don’t worry, I’ll call.”
“I hope so.” Placing another chaste kiss on Lisa’s lips, Mark walked down the front steps of the building and hailed a cab.
Lisa let herself into the brownstone, grinning so broadly her cheeks hurt. Taking the steps two at a time, she let herself into her apartment. Kicking off her shoes, she walked straight to her bed. The moment her head hit the pillow, Lisa fell into a peaceful sleep. Concerns about sexuality, divorce, and family were pushed aside. Thoughts of warm, urgent lips and tongue led Lisa into the pleasure of a deep sleep.