SUBTLE LIGHTING ILLUMINATED the back of the car, groping through the shadows. It caught in Nick’s eyes and sank into the hard, masculine angles of his face. Jayne shivered. For some reason it deepened the intimacy, turning it from businesslike to something far more personal. Though some of the noise and bustle from the city penetrated the soundproofing, she could hear his steady breathing, feel him on a purely visceral level. It unsettled her more than she cared to admit.
Realizing he wasn’t going to let the subject drop until she answered, she reluctantly admitted, “It’s your fault, Nick. You distract me.” Embarrassed, she turned her head away to stare through the window. Instead, she found herself watching him in the reflection of the glass. “You look different tonight.”
“What’s different about me?” He sounded genuinely curious. “I’m wearing a suit and tie just like I do every day at the office.”
She shrugged, still not looking at him. “I don’t know. You’re just…different.”
To her surprise, he caught her chin in the palm of his hand and turned her to face him. “If anything I should be the one distracted. I look the same as I always do. But you’ve transformed yourself.”
Her eyes widened in alarm. “Should I have worn a business suit?”
“Hell, no.” His gaze tracked across her face, alerting her to the fact that she’d used a bit more makeup than normal. “You usually wear your hair up.”
He continued to cup her face, the texture of his hand as labor-hard and callused as her Mystery Lover’s, revealing that Nick did far more than push pencils all day. “It’s more businesslike when I wear it up,” she managed to say.
“I like it down.” He released her chin and captured a loose curl between his fingers. He was close, oh, so close. The scent of him filled her nostrils, while the sheer strength of his character threatened to overwhelm her. “It’s very ’40s. Very Lauren Bacall in her heyday. You remind me of her. You share her beauty and elegance. Her intelligence.”
She didn’t know how to respond. “You flatter me.”
He leaned closer, his mouth a breath away from her own. “It’s not flattery when it’s the truth.”
The car pulled to a stop and Nick pulled back. What would have happened if they hadn’t arrived just then? she couldn’t help but wonder. If the drive had taken just a few precious moments more? Would he have kissed her? Would she have let him? And if he had…if she had, how would it have affected their work relationship?
She drew in a deep, steadying breath. There wasn’t any doubt about the answer to that one. It would have ruined it. And if that happened she’d be crushed, not just because it would have an adverse impact on the work front, but because she enjoyed the casually intimate relationship she shared with him. She didn’t want to do anything to rock the boat.
Climbing from the car, she donned her work mask, intent on sweeping away any lingering awareness and tension beneath a cool, friendly facade. Fortunately, she’d gotten rather good at pretending these days. Lots of practice donning the various roles she and her Mystery Lover created for their romantic escapades. She’d simply create a new role for herself—the perfect assistant.
By the end of the evening, she had fully relaxed, pleased that she managed to play her part to perfection. Somehow she succeeded in charming Adams, getting him to loosen his grasp on prim, if not on proper. And she kept Zander from pushing any of the older man’s hot buttons, teasing him just enough that he was careful never to do or say anything to cause dissension. She even held Nick at a polite distance, though with some difficulty. And she thoroughly enjoyed herself the entire time.
Best of all, Nick managed to get the two men talking about the merger and discussing their differences and how they might overcome them. It was a huge breakthrough and one that promised serious movement in wedding the two enterprises. Jayne was actually sorry when the evening came to an end, and found to her utter surprise that she hadn’t missed her romantic rendezvous at all. Well…hardly at all. Her brow wrinkled in bewilderment.
Why didn’t it bother her to miss her usual Saturday night date?
It wasn’t the passion. She definitely missed that. And it wasn’t the role-playing. She thoroughly enjoyed every aspect of that. Could it be her Mystery Lover? Jayne hesitated. She still adored being with him, didn’t she?
“Jayne, are you ready?”
She blinked, awareness returning. Both Adams and Zander were gone and Nick stood watching her, his eyes laser-sharp, piercing straight through her until she feared he could read her every thought and emotion. Taking her time, she drank the last of her coffee, then stood, inclining her head with a calmness she was far from feeling. “All set.”
“You disappeared again,” he commented.
“Yes, I did.”
He retrieved her cape from the restaurant cloakroom and wrapped it around her, his hands lingering on her shoulders. “Where did you go?”
“I was thinking.”
His mouth settled into a grim line. “Do I have to drag it out of you?”
“You don’t have to drag anything out of me, Mr. Fontana.” She deliberately retreated into formality. “The last time I checked, my thoughts were my own business.”
“You were thinking about him, weren’t you?”
She tilted her head to one side. “And if I were?”
She could practically see him running through a list of replies, sorting them one by one in the hopes of finding the perfect response. “You’re on my time now. Daydream on your own.”
Clever. “You’re right. I apologize.”
To her amusement, he swore beneath his breath. “Damn it, Jayne. You have the most annoying knack of taking the wind out of my sails.”
“It is annoying, isn’t it?” she sympathized. Naturally, Nick’s car was waiting at the curb for them as they left the restaurant. She’d decided long ago that his driver must be a mind reader.
The minute they were ensconced inside, Nick turned to her. “Is there anything I can do to make up for stealing you away from this man you’re seeing?” He grimaced. “What’s his name?”
“I don’t know.” She attempted to keep her reply light and careless, but she doubted she’d fooled him. Nick Fontana saw entirely too much.
“Still?” She caught the hint of disapproval in the single word. “What’s he hiding?”
“You should know.”
He jerked in surprise. “I should?”
She swiveled to face him. “You know who he is. You checked into him that first night, remember?”
He dismissed her comment with an impatient wave. “I asked the manager of the Centoria Mark, Mr. Jacks, to look into your Zorro’s identity. He wasn’t concerned about your safety or well-being, so neither am I. You have no clue?”
She shrugged. “We don’t get personal.”
“Huh. What do you talk about?”
She opened her mouth and then closed it again. She couldn’t believe it. Leave it to Nick. With that one simple question he nailed the source of her dissatisfaction with her romantic escapade. She and ML didn’t talk. Not about things that mattered. Not like she and Nick did on those special occasions when business edged into the personal. Of course, it had been her decision to keep her relationship with ML on a purely sexual footing, but still… She and Nick had a purely business relationship. Well, for the most part. And she knew endless things about him.
She turned to Nick with sudden urgency. “I know you, don’t I?”
His eyes narrowed in question. “I would hope so. After all, we’ve been working together for several months now.”
She stabbed her finger in his direction. “Right. Exactly. Several months. The same length of time I’ve been seeing Zorro. For instance, I know you’re a liberal. That you care passionately about the welfare of children and animals. I know you received advanced degrees from Harvard and Stanford in international business and finance. I know that when you acquire new companies your preference is to build them up rather than tear them down. You speak four languages fluently.”
“Five, but who’s counting,” he teased. “I also speak an additional four foreign languages rather badly. Fortunately, the two categories don’t overlap.”
Her lips quivered into a smile, stealing away some of her intensity. “You prefer chocolate over vanilla,” she continued her catalog. “You have a fondness for strawberries, but melons make your tongue itch. You like your coffee black, hot and strong, imported from a small finca in Costa Rica.”
“Sounds like you’ve been studying me.”
“That’s the odd thing.” She stared at him, unblinkingly. “I haven’t been studying you. At least, not consciously. I’ve just learned all that by working with you, day in and day out.”
“Okay, so what’s your point?”
“This man I’m seeing—”
“The man without a name.”
“Yes. It isn’t just his name I don’t know,” she confessed. “I know nothing about him as a person. Not his likes and dislikes—other than sexual. Not whether he reads a newspaper or even knows what’s going on around him. To be honest, it’s my fault we haven’t tried to get to know each other better, but even so…” She trailed off and shook her head.
“Sounds like a rather shallow relationship.”
“Yes,” she murmured. “It is.”
And that was the problem. Originally, she thought she wanted a purely physical relationship, one that wouldn’t distract her from work. But spending time with Nick made her long for something deeper and more meaningful. Something with substance. Something that ran the gamut of all aspects of her personality and life, not one narrow area—even if that area was hands-down spectacular.
The worst part of it was…there was someone in her life that fit the bill perfectly. Nick. He was brilliant. He shared all parts of his life with her. He was sexy as sin. Masculine as hell. And though he’d pulled back at the last minute, she didn’t doubt for a moment that had he kissed her, she’d have been a goner. Over the months she’d been with her Mystery Lover, she’d learned a lot about herself and her sexuality. The New Year’s Eve fireworks display would pale in comparison to the sparks generated if she and Nick ever kissed.
Tonight had brought home one additional fact, a fact she could blame entirely on Nick. Her clandestine meetings at the Centoria Mark were no longer satisfying her. It had gotten to the point where every time she made love to her fantasy partner, she fantasized that he was Nick. What if one night she slipped up and called him by her boss’s name? She closed her eyes, conceding the inevitable. The time had come to end her relationship with her Mystery Lover.
IT WAS ALMOST TIME, NICK decided, pleased. Soon he could merge his two identities and create the sort of relationship he longed to have with Jayne. He could tell from her comments that she no longer wanted to hold Zorro at a distance, that she was frustrated by the shallowness of their nights together.
Granted, the sex was off the charts. He’d never experienced such intensity and sexual intimacy with any other woman. But it lacked a matching emotional connection which left them both vaguely dissatisfied. Thank God she’d finally realized that fact.
He considered how he’d handle next weekend when she asked for more from their relationship. Should he tell her the truth then, or give her a few more weeks to get to know him in his Zorro guise? The timing was crucial. If he revealed his identity too soon, she might be offended and embarrassed by his secrecy, which had never been his intention. If he waited too long, he risked the same result.
Maybe he should wait until after the Adams/Zander merger was finalized. That way, if everything worked out the way he hoped, it wouldn’t create an unwanted distraction at the office. Or if he misjudged her feelings for him, delaying the big reveal would avoid any unfortunate tension during the final merger negotiations. Delaying the truth would also have one additional benefit for Jayne. If he waited until after the Adams/Zander merger, she would know that her promotion was the result of her own hard work and not wonder if it was because of their sexual relationship.
He glanced at Jayne, tempted beyond reason to reach for her and kiss her. To say to hell with pretense and gamble on the helpless want reflected in her blue eyes. At the last instant, he shook his head. Patience, he reminded himself. Let her admit that she wanted more from her weekend rendezvous before finalizing their personal merger. Just like in all his business dealings, it would be worth it in the long run.
JAYNE SPENT THE ENTIRE WEEK before her final meeting at the Centoria Mark making preparations. First, she emailed ML and informed him that she would like to choose the theme for Saturday night and pay for the suite. He answered almost immediately, agreeing to the first and arguing over the second. But she held firm and eventually he capitulated.
Next she sent him the names of the legendary lovers she’d chosen, wondering if he’d read anything into it. She could only hope that he wouldn’t take it badly when she terminated their affair. Surely he knew it would have to end at some point.
For the first time since she started working with Nick, the week dragged. Worse, he picked up on her inattentiveness. Toward the end of Friday—her boss’s crunch time—it was at its worse.
“What is it with you, Myleston?” he demanded in exasperation. “Get with it, will you? I want to finish off these final few projects so they don’t drag out over the weekend.”
“Sorry.” She rubbed her forehead, hoping to ease the tension headache rapidly gathering there. “The preliminary contract for the Adams/Zander merger, right? I’ve flagged the final round of changes and they should be ready to go out first thing Monday.”
“Glad you’ve finally decided to join me.” He crossed his office to the wet bar and poured two cups of his special blend coffee. “Forget the contract, Jayne. Come and sit down. Take a load off.”
It wasn’t a request. She joined him in the sitting area, choosing the chair across the coffee table from the sofa. She accepted the cup he offered with murmured thanks and buried her nose in the fragrant steam drifting upward from the inky surface. She glanced at him, attempting to gauge his mood. With the exception of business negotiations when he was utterly impossible to read, she’d always found him direct and straightforward about his emotions. Right now, he didn’t look annoyed so much as concerned.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, going straight to the heart of the matter. “You’ve been off all week.”
“You’re right.” She retreated into formality. “I’m sorry, Nick. I’ve allowed personal distractions to interfere with my job. I promise it won’t happen again.”
He swore and she started in surprise, her cup chattering nervously against the saucer. His hazel eyes flashed a golden warning, one she knew from experience to heed. “I thought we knew each other well enough to be honest.”
Everything inside of her melted. “I’m sorry,” she repeated, though this time her apology was personal. “I’ve just been trying to make some decisions about my life and where I want to take it and it’s split my focus. Still…I shouldn’t have allowed that to intrude on my work.”
Nick’s brows pulled together. “You’re not leaving Fontana, Inc.”
She couldn’t quite tell if it was a question or an order. She shot him a teasing smile. “What and give up the long hours, teetering workload, knockdown, drag-out negotiations, not to mention the pleasure of working with Mr. Intimidating, himself?”
She could tell he didn’t quite know whether or not she was serious. “Right,” he said. “All that.”
“I’m not leaving Fontana, Inc. until you throw me out,” she said gently, letting him off the hook.
He visibly relaxed. “That’s fine, then.”
He fell silent while he drank his coffee, though his gaze never left hers. She recognized it as one of his business tactics. With most people, that patented stare had them babbling like idiots inside a minute, confessing every real or imagined sin. During negotiations, it had his opponents caving to any and all demands. Down in the arena they referred to it as The Look. For some reason, she was immune to it, just as she was immune to his occasional attempts to overwhelm her with the strength of his personality.
She leaned back against the love seat and considered that intriguing fact. Why didn’t it bother her? Could it be that she saw Nick differently from the rest of his employees and business associates? Saw past the iconic Fontana to the actual man behind the facade? It was a peculiar thought. A reassuring one, even, considering the feelings she’d developed for him.
“Son of a—”
His cup and saucer hit the coffee table with enough force to shatter the delicate porcelain. Fortunately, it didn’t. He climbed to his feet and came for her. She had just enough time to put her own cup and saucer on the coffee table before he hauled her to her feet.
“How do you do it?” he demanded, glaring down at her.
She shook her head in bewilderment. “Do what?”
“You’re not the least intimidated by me, are you? You never have been. Whatever I do rolls off of you like frigging raindrops off an oblivious mallard.”
She glared at him. “Are you calling me a duck?”
“Yes. A duck. An effing duck.” Only he didn’t say effing.
Maybe if she hadn’t been so tired and distracted. Or maybe if they hadn’t spent last Saturday night together, she could have responded appropriately, even if he was deliberately pushing her buttons. But how could she when he appealed to her in every possible way?
He was also touching her, his hands warm and firm through her blouse. And he stood so close, the deliciously masculine scent of him flooding her senses. His voice rumbled with power…and something more. A hint of passion. It was just enough to tip her from prudence into foolishness.
“You intimidate me, Nick,” she admitted. “But not as my employer.”
“Then how?” he demanded.
“As a man.”
She slid her arms up his chest and cupped that strong, rugged face in her palms. Lifting onto tiptoe she kissed him, putting every ounce of passion into the taking. He froze…not a good sign. His lips molded briefly to hers and her thoughts flashed to her Mystery Lover and the first kiss they’d shared as one year ended and another began. With a soft cry of utter disbelief, she ripped free. How could she keep kissing one man while longing for the other? It was crazy.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, utterly horrified by what she’d done. “I’m so sorry.” She spun on her heel and ran from his office.
“Jayne, wait—”
She ignored him. Dashing to her office, she snatched up her coat and purse. He’d expect her to head for the elevators and would no doubt intercept her there. She made a beeline for the stairs. One floor down she caught an empty elevator headed down. The instant the doors parted on the lobby level, she darted from the building into a wintry snarl of rush-hour traffic.
She was crying uncontrollably by the time she arrived at her apartment building. Instead of going to her room, she banged on Courtney’s door, practically falling into her friend’s arms when it swung open. Two shots of whiskey later, she stopped crying and stared at her friend through bleary, reddened eyes.
“What is wrong with me?” she demanded. “Tomorrow I plan to end my relationship with ML because whenever we’re together all I can think about is Nick. And the first time I kiss Nick—a colossal mistake, by the way—who do I think about?”
Courtney took a wild stab in the dark. “ML?”
Jayne thrust a finger in her friend’s direction. “Exactly. Sick. I’m sick. It’s the only explanation.”
“Hmm.” Courtney poured them another round of drinks, looking annoyingly unconcerned. “If you say so.”
“What else could it be? I’m falling in love with my boss while having a torrid affair with a man who’s name and face I don’t even know. You tell me. Is that normal?”
Courtney grinned, toasting Jayne with her shot glass. “Not for the average person, no. But it sure sounds like fun.”
Jayne blew out a sigh and stretched out on the couch, hooking her arm across her eyes. “I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m just not made for fun. It’s not in my nature to be outrageous. I’m not Cleopatra or a Southern belle or Dracula’s mate or Maid Marian.”
“Sure you are. At least, part of you is.” Courtney tugged at Jayne’s arm, forcing her to sit up again. “Sweetie, a few months ago you were buried beneath a plain Jayne facade. Now look at you. You’re vibrant and colorful and dynamic. And it’s all because of your Mystery Lover. He released the woman in you. He freed you to be who you really are.”
Jayne frowned. “Then you think I should stay with him?”
“Not if you think your feelings for Nick are serious, no.” Courtney shrugged. “Only you can make that decision, though I’m a textbook example for why women should never date their boss.”
Jayne nodded with a bittersweet smile. “I wish I could have both. But since I can’t, I’ve already made my decision. Even if Nick fires me or gives me hell for crossing the line with that kiss, I still choose reality over the fantasy.”
Courtney shrugged. “If that’s what you want.” Her expression turned mischievous. “But something tells me come tomorrow night you’re going to change your mind.”