What? I don’t know why yall sitting there with ya mouth open shaking ya head at me, like I’m the fuckin Black Widow or some shit! Let the bitch who be without sin, cast the first stone! She brought it on herself. Yeah, I loved my homegirl Nique! But I love my man more. More than anything or anybody. She knew how I felt about him when she slid her black ass up under him. It won’t enough that she somehow tricked him into putting a ring on her finger, but then the bitch pop up talking about she about to have his baby! Oh, no the hell you not! Wit ya slick ass. I know she never told Banks how I begged her every weekend to let me come with her to see him. And every weekend she’d say the same shit. “Not this time.” It got to the point where I just stopped asking. I knew she didn’t really want me to see him. And how the hell could I tell Banks that the reason he’d only gotten two letters from me, was because I’d only been to school up until the 6th grade and that I can’t spell that good. The two letters he did get, I’d had Peaches write for me, and then that ho caught a funky ass attitude and wouldn’t write for me no more. Stupid bitch. I got something for her slick ass too. But how the hell could I tell Banks that, and have him looking at me like a dummy? Oh, hell to the no! So, you see the position I was in? I know it was Monique’s backstabbing ass who told Banks about me and Peaches doing a lil candy licking too. But I bet she didn’t tell him how her ass got pissy drunk one night and joined in. Ok. Ok. I did slip some Molly in her drink. But that aint no excuse! She still did it! She cried like a baby the next morning too. Talking about she cheated on Banks. Bitch get a grip! You let Peaches eat yo pussy, so what? I gotta give it to her though. I sent mad niggas at her trying to get her to give up some pussy. I’m talking some official get money niggas too. That shit was a dead issue. She sat on that pussy and waited for Banks. And in the real world, that shit is damn near unheard of! So, I give her props on that. But fuck that, she stole my man. I love him. He’s my soulmate. And no, it’s not just because of the Mr. Marcus style fuckin he be putting on a bitch neither. But I will admit, that shit is a HUGE plus! I mean come on now, what woman doesn’t want a man with a big dick that can make her sing Star Spangled Banner in six different tongues she’s cummin so hard? That’s what the fuck I thought. I mean, just think of all the dudes you’ve gave the pussy up to, and when the shit was over you were laying there like, “What the hell was that bullshit?” Yep. You go right to your pussy pamphlet, find his name, write a big zero beside it, then scratch that shit the fuck off! And don’t even front like you don’t be giving up the pussy like that, because it aint no more grown virgins, and yo name damn sure aint Mary. We girls love to get us a good nutt, just as much as the boys do. Can I get an Amen? I’m a female, I know, so stop the bullshit. Believe a bitch when I tell you, that Banks is the kind of dude that you might meet out somewhere; hell, he might be your man’s homeboy, and it don’t take but a few short minutes of being around him and you like, “Damn. I wanna give this nigga some pussy.” You feeling all crazy about yourself, because in the same moment you like, “Damn, I don’t even know him. What’s wrong with me?” Nothing. The Kitty Kat just spoke for you, and the Kitty Kat always knows. But like I said, it aint all about the sex with Teddy. It’s something about him that just draws you to him. It makes you wanna be around him, please him and seek his approval. Out of all the dudes I’ve ever fucked with, I’ve never felt like this before. Just the mere mention of his name makes my heart quicken! That’s how I know he’s my soulmate. You only live once goddammit, and I deserve to be happy too! What? What did you just say? What about Hood? Yeah what about him? Fuck Hood’s punk ass. Hood won’t nothing but a vessel to bring Banks into my life. I know that now. Yes, God does work in mysterious ways, doesn’t he? My grandmother dying and leaving me that two thousand dollars was another sign. It was just the excuse I needed to be able to give my baby his money back. I’d already been giving him an extra thousand here, and extra thousand there when I paid him for the soft he’d been giving me to sell. Then I gave him $47,000 thousand when my grandmother died. Another seven thousand and I’ll have given him all the money I took from his safe. I could never steal from my man. Well, technically he aint my man yet, but he will be. It’s only a matter of time. It’s meant to be. And Shell! That piece of shit! How the fuck he gonna go and tell Banks that I gave him some pussy! He almost ruined us! I fixed his punk ass up nice too. Fuckin junkie! The morning after Monique was found, I went to the beauty salon to get me a fresh Doobie. While I was there, I casually mentioned that Shell was the main suspect in Monique’s death, and that everybody who was anybody, knew he was the one that killed her. Although the police had no real way of proving it. Bingo! Now all us bitches know, if you want some hot gossip to hit the streets quick, go mention that shit at your nearest hair and nail shop. Them gossip spreading bitches will come running outta there with some news, quicker than roaches when the lights come on! Yep, he deserves everything he gets for trying to turn my boo against me. DIE NIGGA! But wait a minute. Hold the fuck up! I don’t know why I keep hearing bitches smacking they teeth and shit. Bitch don’t judge me! I don’t give a fuck if you the Queen of England, or Lil Kim. It aint a bitch in this world, that can look herself in the mirror and honestly say, that it’s not at least one man somewhere; either past, present, or future, that she wouldn’t kill just to have. Or have back. Bitch keep it real with your motherfuckin self! Wait a minute…. Oh shit! I’ll holla back at yall tomorrow! There go my man coming up the steps. I gotta go! Don’t judge me. Holla back. Until Tomorrow…