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STELLAN’S JAW WAS STILL clenched but he neither confirmed nor denied Neris’s statement.
Loud shouts from the deck drew Neris’s attention and she glanced up. “We’re heading out soon.” Her eyebrows rose, her eyes gleaming. “I’ve found this perfect spot in the middle of the ocean. Weighed down, Stellan might even sink right to the bottom. It’s going to be very special.”
Still pulling at his wrist clamps in his rage, Stellan’s jaw clenched again.
But despite his attempts to move away, Neris simply stroked down his cheek. “I’ll see you later, darling.”
The trapdoor slammed shut once more, taking the sunlight with it as Neris exited the hold.
Stellan huffed in stark displeasure. He turned toward Caelina with a concerned crease on his forehead. “Are you okay?” he asked again.
Caelina was still too completely stunned to form words. She held on to the wooden pole to maintain her balance. Given the revelations for the reason of their capture...and other things, it took her a few moments to collect herself. “Was what she said true?”
Stellan cracked his neck in unease. “She was my lover, and I stopped seeing her, that is true.”
Caelina chewed on her lips as she hesitantly lifted her gaze to meet his.
He visibly swallowed before speaking again. “And...yes. I...have been in love with you.”
Warmth shot through Caelina and her chest began to heave but she couldn’t identify what she was feeling. Happy? Devastated? Excited? Murderous?
She shook her head in puzzlement. “B-But you’ve been with so many women, I thought surely—”
Stellan closed his eyes for a moment. “No. I’ve...satisfied them for the most part. But I could never commit to any of them. I tried to—I tried to feel for them. I thought surely any one of them would make me feel. But after a while it became pointless. My heart...already belonged to someone.”
“I’m so sorry it’s come to this,” he apologized with a deep sigh. “Neris was one of the few who figured out why I couldn’t be with her any longer. Suffice it to say, she was insanely jealous of my feelings for you.”
Caelina’s response was quiet, awed. “I thought you always hated me.”
His forehead creased again, Stellan’s gaze was on the floorboards. “No.”
“Oh.”
“I was going to tell you last night. That’s why I asked you to step out with me. It was the first time we were finally alone together.” He seemed to hesitate. “We weren’t supposed to know. I’m sure you only found out about the match last season. But I already knew,” he admitted.
Caelina was stunned again. “What? How?”
“I’d overheard my parents talking about it when I was younger.”
She cast him a wary look. “Younger when?”
“I’ve known all my life, Caelina.”
Caelina almost gasped.
“That’s why I was always a jerk to you,” Stellan relayed. “I tried to ignore you. I tried everything to resist you.” Still frowning, he shook his head. “I was upset. I...resented the idea of the match because I wanted to be able to choose who to wed, who to love. But as it turns out, I also chose you anyway.”
Her eyebrows furrowed. “You don’t even know anything about me. Nobody does.”
Stellan gave her a meaningful look. “You’ve touched more lives than you realize. The village children love your stories and illusions. No matter how busy you are, you always make time to sit and talk with the elders whose families are away or have gone. The warriors are always saying how you are firm but fair during training. No one in the village has a bad word to say about you. Every single person would tell you how generous, how kind, how capable you are. You are...warm, smart, strong. You are the most beautiful person I have ever known.”
Caelina’s heart hammered in her chest. He was standing a few feet away, not even touching her, but it was as if his earnest, imploring gaze reached out to envelop her, she no longer felt the chill in the air.
He dropped his eyes for a moment. “I couldn’t show you all this, couldn’t give you lavish gifts. I could only offer what I could make with my own hands.” One corner of his mouth turned up. “Except, I think the tree behind your house is running out of space.”
She sucked in her breath in realization. “The chimes... You did that.”
Stellan shrugged. “It made you smile, that day when your parents passed on, so I thought perhaps...” he trailed off.
Caelina could barely wrap her head around the implications of what he had been doing. “Every year, you did that.” If her heart wasn’t full before, it certainly was now.
“I enjoy making them...the chimes and lanterns. Each one is beautiful and unique, like you are. And it made me happy to know they brought you pleasure.”
Caelina was beyond speechless. “Stellan, I never... I can’t believe...”
His chin clenched with his impassioned speech. “I’ve trained hard all my life. I pushed myself to be stronger, to be better, every day. I’ve made sure to consistently be the best warrior in our village. So that when the time came, there would be no question, no doubt, and everyone would agree. I was worthy of you.”
Her eyes almost welled up at his words. With her inevitable fate and great responsibility, Caelina had been afraid she would be alone all her life just as she had always been. But she hadn’t been alone at all. Stellan had been with her this whole time. She just didn’t know it.
His cheeks reddening after a moment, Stellan glanced away. “Stop looking at me like that. I don’t expect you to feel the same way. You don’t have to say anything.”
Caelina’s cheeks were red as well, her entire body flushed hot, and something tugged at her heart. But with the overwhelming surge of intense and unfamiliar feelings, all she could manage was an awkward mumble. “This is so not the time and place for this.”
Stellan blinked as if snapping out of a trance. “You’re right. This isn’t important right now. We need to get out of here.”
Seeing his face fall, Caelina realized she must have sounded dismissive of his feelings when in fact, she was feeling the exact opposite way about them. Frowning in self-reprimand, she chewed on her lips again, but after a moment, she shook herself out of it.
Dismissive or not, she wasn’t wrong. They still needed to escape this place. And once they were home and safe, Caelina would make sure to let Stellan know how much she treasured his words. She took a deep breath, satisfied with her new resolve.
Stellan was already busy strategizing their escape, his gaze roving above them to study the length of the chain. “Right.” He turned his back, holding his palms facing up and out. “Do you think you could hop up and unlatch the chain from the brace?”
Caelina glanced up at the pulley again before carefully approaching him. “I can try.” Her wrists clamped together, she propped her hands on his shoulders. With one foot pushing down on his hands, she tried to shunt herself upward to grab the chain.
She lost her balance and fell backward on her feet—tugging on his end of the chain.
“Ow, ow, ow—!” Stellan cried out.
She cringed again. “Sorry!”
He shot her a pained look but tried to dismiss it. “It’s fine.” Turning to face her, he blew out a deep breath. “I’m sorry about this. But I think you’re going to have to climb me to unlatch the chain.”
“Climb—what?”
