Twenty-Four

Rusty shook off the sleep fog and climbed out of bed. The pounding on the door continued. Or was it from his head? He was pretty sure he had a headache.

The banging continued. 

“I’m coming!” He ran his hands through his hair and stumbled. It was probably a good thing he hadn’t had anything to drink. He was already a mess.

He made it to the front door and stood tall. Who could it be? The cops? Had they found the arsonist already?

Rusty opened the door and stepped back. He did a double-take. “Alyssa?”

He vaguely recalled her saying she’d watch the place after she followed him home the night he found out about Mandy’s death.

Alyssa Mercer stood on his front porch, next to a young man a little taller than her with dark hair past his ears. He resembled her. It was probably her son. He was definitely too young to be her husband. And he appeared to be checking Rusty out, too. Some first impression.

“What’s going on?” Alyssa asked. “Your shed is destroyed.”

“Garage.” Rusty rubbed his eyes. “Arson, apparently.”

Alyssa’s eyes widened. “Are you okay? No offense, but you look terrible.”

“My sister just died and someone lit my garage on fire. I think I’m entitled.”

“Hey, I’m the last one to judge. Do you need anything?”

A drink. A really hard one. Rusty shook his head.

“Can we come in?”

He stepped closer to the door. “I’m here now. Thanks for checking in. I don’t want to keep you two.” 

Alyssa glanced at the young man. “Sorry, I forgot to introduce you. This is my son, Alex. Alex, this is Rusty.”

“Nice to meet you,” Alex said. He held out his hand.

Rusty took his hand and shook it. “Likewise. I hope this visit didn’t take you away from anything important.”

Alex shook his head. “Just picking my classes. I’m starting at the U in the fall.”

“That should be fun. Well, I don’t want to keep you guys.”

Alyssa caught his gaze and frowned. “I feel like we should do something for you. You just don’t seem yourself. I mean, obviously you’re having a hard time. What do you need? We can run to the store.”

“Really, I’m fine. It’s just a headache.”

“Do you have any painkillers?” 

He opened his mouth to say yes, but realized he wasn’t sure. 

“That’s it,” Alyssa said. “We’ll drop by the grocery store down the road. Need anything else while we’re there?”

Just alcohol. He shook his head. “I’ve got everything else.”

Alyssa handed Alex a set of keys. “Can you pick up some aspirin? I’m going to make him something to eat.”

Rusty put up his hand. “Really—”

“I insist. After all you did for me when I was at the end of my rope, it’s the least I can do for you.” She came inside.

Alex glanced at Rusty, shrugged, and turned around. A few moments later, a car door opened and the engine started.

Alyssa closed the door behind them. “Okay, now that Alex isn’t here, will you tell me what’s really going on?”

Rusty sighed. “I told you. My sister died and someone set my place on fire.”

She gave him a knowing look. “There’s more to the story than that. I can tell something else is wrong.”

He really didn’t want to admit to falling off the rails. The man who towed drunks had turned to liquor himself.

“What is it? How can I help?”

“You’ve done plenty, thanks.”

“Don’t want to talk? Okay, I’ll just make you something to eat, then.”

He shook his head, but didn’t say anything. Maybe she’d feel better after he ate, and then leave.

In the kitchen, Alyssa gestured toward the table. “Sit. It’s my turn to take care of you.”

Yawning, Rusty sat. 

She opened the fridge. “Oh, these have to go.”

Had he forgotten to toss the strawberries? He put his face in his palms. “I haven’t had time to—”

“Don’t worry about it.” She turned around, holding an armful rotten food. “You look like you could use some more rest. Why don’t you go to bed? I’ll let you know when the food’s ready.”

“But I don’t want you to be—”

“Nonsense. Go.”

“Was I this pushy?”

The corners of her mouth twitched. “Worse, but in retrospect, that’s what I needed. You’ll thank me later. Trust me.”

“Okay.” He got up and headed out of the room. He stopped and turned around. “Thanks, Alyssa. I appreciate it.” Even if he was annoyed, it was true.

She smiled. “It’s my pleasure. Get some rest.”

Rusty went to his room, sat on his bed, and took a deep breath. As tired as he was, he didn’t feel like lying down. He needed to get started on taking pictures. He’d just start in there with Lani’s stuff. Then he’d get the rest of the house after Alyssa left. Hopefully Alex would pick out extra-strength painkillers. The pain in his head was squeezing tighter every minute.

He looked around for his phone. It was on the nightstand, still plugged in where he’d left it. He grabbed it. The battery was full. Good, but even if it wasn’t, he would have still unplugged it.

Where to start? Rusty glanced around, his gaze landing on the closet. His heart nearly leaped into his throat. He hadn’t gone near Lani’s side in… ever? He wasn’t sure he’d even looked in. It was a habit to pretend her stuff wasn’t there next to his. Some things were harder to deal with, and her clothes were one of them for some reason. Something he’d never been able to face.

Rusty took a deep breath and stood in front of the closet door. He opened her side and studied the clothes hanging exactly as she’d left them. Mostly color-coded and sorted by season. It was exactly her. And it was going to break his heart all over again. He scanned her shoes lining the floor beneath. They were arranged in the same pattern—color and season, with the practical shoes in front and the pretty ones in back.

He reached for the nearest clothes. Something in the back corner of the closet caught his attention. Some long dresses nearly blocked it from view, but him pulling hangers off had disturbed them, revealing whatever was there. He slid the clothes back and kneeled. 

It looked a basket of some kind. He leaned over the shoes and pushed the long dresses out of the way. It was a large picnic basket, and he’d definitely never seen it before.

Carefully, he grabbed the handles and brought it out. It was painted reddish-brown and was high quality. And heavy. His heart raced, wondering what could be inside. What had Lani been doing with it?

He set it on the bed and opened the top. Two bottles. One of wine and the other champagne. Two wine glasses. Some plates, flatware, and nonperishables. Were they supposed to go on a picnic? It was hard to remember so far back, especially with everything being a blur around the time of the crash.

There was something else in there. A paper. He pulled it out. An envelope with what felt like a greeting card inside. 

Rusty’s hand shook. He nearly dropped the card. What was inside? Why the picnic supplies? He opened the sealed card, shaking, and managed to give himself a paper cut on this thumb. He pulled the card out. It had a picture of a happy couple in love.

His heart nearly jumped out of his chest as he opened it. The inside read Happy Anniversary. Hearts were drawn in Lani’s handwriting. On the left side of the card was a personal note. Rusty’s throat closed up. He slid to the carpet and stared at the writing. His hand shook too much to read the writing.

He took several deep breaths and rested the card against his knee. 

Dear Rusty,

You’ve given me everything I ever dreamed of—and far more! I never knew life could be so wonderful, but you showed me paradise on earth. Love grander than I ever imagined. Then along came those two wonderful boys, partly you and partly me. All perfection. I really couldn’t ask for anything more. 

His vision blurred from tears. He wiped them away, but even more replaced them. They fell faster than he could keep up with. His life with Lani and the boys really had been perfect. But then it had been snatched from them all. Oh, how he wished he’d been in that car. Either to save them or go with them. It didn’t matter which. Living without them was the worst fate. And to make matters worse, back at Mandy’s, he’d acted like they had never even existed. 

Footsteps sounded down the hall. Rusty scrambled to his feet and locked his door.

Alyssa knocked. “Are you okay in there?”

Rusty cleared his throat. “Just resting.”

“Alex is back, and he needs to get back to the house. The food has another hour before it’s ready. Will you be able to get it? Sorry we can’t stay.”

He wiped his eyes and took a deep breath. His eyes felt swollen. Oh, well. He opened the door. 

Alyssa’s eyes widened when she saw him. “Are you okay?”

“Allergies,” he lied. “I came across some dust.”

She didn’t look like she believed him. “Do you want me to come back? I’m sure Chad—”

“No,” Rusty said. “I just need to take care of some things. I’ll be fine. I promise.”

Alyssa tilted her head, looking unconvinced. “Okay. But if you need anything—anything at all—please call me. I can’t imagine what you must be going through, losing your sister after losing your family.” She frowned and patted his arm. “Oh. Here’s the painkillers.” She dug into her purse and handed him a bottle of ibuprofen. 

“Thanks, Alyssa. For everything.”

“Call me. Anytime.”

He nodded. “I will.”

She squeezed his arm. “Take care of yourself. I might check in on you later.”

Rusty could tell by her expression that she was worried. He tried to force a smile, but it didn’t work. “I’ll be fine. I always am.”

Alyssa frowned and then turned around. A minute later, he heard the front door close.

He sighed in relief. More tears came. He hadn’t been expecting to find anything new from Lani. Especially nothing like that. He cleared his throat again and sat next to the basket, waiting for the tears to stop. He picked up the card and read the rest of the handwritten note. 

Lani wrote about some of the best times they’d had together as a couple and as a family. His heart both swelled with love and shattered into pieces as he read the words. The note was too short—why couldn’t it go on forever? He wanted more new time with Lani. But it ended all too soon.

I just want you to be happy always and forever.

All my love,

Lani

Rusty rested his head on his knees and sobbed like a baby. It was too much. How could he be happy ever again? Misery was his destiny. Loneliness. Fatigue. Anything but happiness. 

He’d managed to survive. To get by. To make himself feel like he was righting the wrong of their deaths by towing drunks. Saving others. But to what end? His family was still gone and nothing could bring them back.

Rusty set the card next to the basket, grabbed a framed picture of Lani, and put it next to the card. 

“Let’s have that wine, sweetie.” He dug into the basket, finding a corkscrew, and opened the bottle of wine. He poured it into the two glasses and set one next to Lani’s picture. 

Rusty took a sip, but then paused. “Wait.” He raised his glass. “To happiness.” He waited for her to raise her glass. “No? Not anymore, huh, babe?”

He downed the whole glass and then looked into Lani’s eyes. “If I could go back in time, I would. I’d do anything to keep you three out of the car that night. Anything at all.” He frowned and poured more wine for himself. “You should have some. It’s good. But you already knew that—you picked it out.”

Before long, the bottle was empty, leaving only Lani’s untouched glass. He leaned back against the bed and closed his eyes. The alcohol felt good running through his system. He finally felt relaxed.

“How about that champagne?” Rusty didn’t wait for a response. He drank her glass and then opened the champagne bottle and poured some into each glass. “Hopefully you guys are happy wherever you are. If there’s anything in the great ever-after.” He tapped her glass, careful not to spill it. His reflexes weren’t up to their normal speed.

Rusty drank half the bottle before looking back into Lani’s eyes. “What do you guys think of me spending time over at Mandy’s? With her kids and neighbor. I went out with Laura, you know. It was fun. She’s nice and pretty. Really pretty, actually. But in a different way than you. You’re classy down to your core. She’s… a free spirit. You’d like her, though.” He sighed. “I’m some husband, huh?”

He poured himself another glass, spilling some onto the carpet. 

“That was a waste,” he muttered.

An alarm went off somewhere. His eyes widened. It wasn’t another fire, was it? He scrambled to his feet, tripping over them. He stumbled down the hall, and it was only when he was almost to the kitchen and smelled something mouth-watering that he remembered Alyssa had made him something to eat.

Rusty tripped over the floor as he entered, catching himself on the wall. He stood tall, trying to gain his bearings. The room was moving around him. At least the tears had stopped. He felt better. 

Mission accomplished.

Now to turn off the timer. He walked slowly, carefully and then reached for the off button.

Finally, blessed silence. Now to get the food out without burning himself or dropping it. Maybe he should have waited on the alcohol until after he’d eaten. That would have been the smart thing to do. But he didn’t care. He felt better, and for the time being, that was all that mattered.