11

Rising out of sleep, Jess suddenly jolted awake, dislocated somewhere between fantasy and reality.

Oh my God. Ellis. Oh my God. I … we … had sex. I’m not a virgin any more.

He wasn’t lying beside her any more either. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, fastening his shirt. Even though she’d barely moved, he turned to her, as if aware that she was fully awake now.

‘I think it’s time for me to go now. It’s half past five. I heard your friend come home a little while ago, but she’s retired to her room. Best that I go now and avoid making any awkwardness for you.’

Did he have to? Good grief, Jess wanted the awkwardness. Suddenly she was wide awake and she wanted to show this gorgeous man off. She wanted Cathy to know that the days of her house-mate being a virgin who couldn’t find a man to fuck her were now officially over. She’d found a prime specimen, even if that man was just a one night stand and not Mr Right.

‘Would you like a cup of tea or coffee before you go? It won’t take a moment to make some and I could do with a cuppa myself.’

Ellis frowned. Oh hell, he must be used to needy women trying to cling to him. She’d probably just committed a cardinal sin, but perhaps it was just as well. There’d have to be a clean break and he was all the more likely to speed away now, to get out of her pathetic coffee-offering clutches.

So, don’t clutch, Jess. Coffee is just coffee. Say goodbye, no fuss, no drama. Accept you had a beautiful initiation, and always remember Ellis as a glorious one-off, never to be repeated.

‘Sure, coffee would be good. I’d love some.’ He gave her a crooked little grin. ‘We’ll have to be quiet as mice though, so as not to wake your friend up.’

‘Don’t worry, she’s a very sound sleeper.’ Jess fished around for her robe. She couldn’t see it, but an instant later, Ellis had retrieved it and was draping it around her shoulders. Close, he seemed about to kiss her, but Jess knew that would be fatal to her peace of mind, so she shot out of bed and out of his reach, provoking another of his frowns.

‘I’ll let you finish getting dressed, while I make the coffee.’ Not trusting herself to look at him, even though there was nothing she wanted more in the world – almost – than to feast her eyes on him, she beat a stealthy retreat and headed downstairs to the kitchen.

It took her just a few moments to make coffee, the best instant. Cradling hers, she sat down at the kitchen table, staring around at the room that looked so normal, even at dawn, so completely the same as ever, when she’d changed so much.

All the years of waiting, wondering, saving herself, wondering whether she was an idiot for saving herself … all over now. And with a man she might never see again. What to do now, that was the question?

Actual sex hadn’t been stupendous, but it hadn’t been awful, and the other bits had been so out of this world that she was sure that actual sex would be equally as gorgeous when she got the hang of it. Frowning, Jess took a sip of her strong coffee, relishing its power.

But what if the out of this world bits – the foreplay – are only out of this world with Ellis?

Now there was a question. One she hardly dare contemplate. What if Mr Right and Mr Sex could never actually be combined into one man? Maybe it didn’t matter if you loved Mr Right enough?

‘Why such a stony frown?’ Ellis’s voice was low, out of respect for Cathy, as he sidled into the room and slipped into the seat opposite Jess. He sipped his coffee immediately, letting out a soft sigh of satisfaction. Obviously he wasn’t a purist and liked instant as well as freshly ground.

‘Just mulling over some issues.’ No use getting into it with him now, or revealing anything that could be construed as trying to cling on to him.

‘Issues concerning me, and what we did last night?’

Bugger!

She hardly dare look at him, yet at the same time, she couldn’t stop. He was dressed now, apart from his jacket that he’d slung over the back of the chair, but his dark hair was still a bit wild. It was easy to imagine the naked form she’d seen last night, and which she’d slept snuggled up against. How was it possible that she’d been to bed with such an unimaginably fabulous man?

Oh God, I want him again. Am I a sex maniac, who just didn’t realise it?

This was crazy. She needed to stop ogling him, and just send him away. But all she could think about was going back to bed with him again, which she knew in her heart and her gut would be better than ever this time, even the actual fucking.

‘Yes, a bit. It was a big thing … It is for any woman.’ The moment after she’d said it, she realised … and started giggling. Apparently she’d got a juvenile dirty mind too.

Ellis smirked. ‘Why, thank you, I’m flattered.’ His handsome face straightened, became more serious. ‘But I know what you really meant. And you’re right.’ Cradling his mug, he stared into it for a moment. ‘I know the actual act wasn’t quite perfect … but you enjoyed the other stuff, I can tell.’ His eyes flashed. ‘And we can work on the main event next time, eh?’

Oh … Oh God, the temptation.

‘I did enjoy the other stuff. And the act itself … in a way.’ No use denying it. ‘But I don’t really think there should be a next time. I mean … You’re you, and I’m me. You won’t be around here much longer, and as you’re so utterly irresistible it’s not a good idea for me to get addicted to you, is it?’

Ellis laughed softly. ‘You won’t get addicted. You’re far too sensible. But I do think you ought to take advantage of me.’

‘How do you mean?’

He took her mug from her hand and set it aside, then clasped both her hands in his.

‘I’ve got a proposition for you, Jess. What I think is a sensible, logical arrangement for both of us. It’s temporary, but we both get benefits.’ His eyes were bright, full of that peculiar blend of mischief and faint melancholy she was beginning to become familiar with.

‘Go on.’ No harm in hearing him out, even if she was pretty sure it wasn’t anything she could accept.

‘I don’t do commitment, and “long term”, as you’ll have gathered. I had the perfect committed relationship once, but I lost it. I’ll never have that again, and I accept that.’ For a moment, his whole face went hard, and Jess wanted to fling herself around to his side of the table and hug him, in an attempt to soften the obvious pain he felt. ‘But I do like sex, and … well, seductions, “liaisons”, call them what you will. I like those a lot.’

His eyes narrowed, and Jess realised she must have betrayed something in her face. Puzzlement, perhaps disapproval? Although she wasn’t sure quite what it was that she felt. If she’d had, and lost, what he’d had, she wasn’t sure how she’d conduct herself afterwards, so she couldn’t judge him.

‘Sex isn’t a betrayal of her memory,’ he said, his voice low. ‘It’s not the deepest core of what we had …’ He hesitated again, pursing his lips, his fight against revealing himself too much very obvious. ‘Julie and I had fabulous sex, but it wasn’t everything. Love was everything … is everything.’

‘And that would be a betrayal.’ It had to be said, and though Ellis didn’t visibly flinch, Jess felt it.

‘Yes.’

‘I see.’

Did she? Did she really? Jess clamped down on something inside her that was trying to protest.

‘So … that’s it for me. I don’t do anything longer than a few weeks. Four or five, tops,’ he said more briskly, smiling a tricky, charlatan smile that Jess knew was another mask. ‘How would that be for you, Jess? If it’s no good, just say so, and we’ll part as friends.’ His expression became more seductive, even trickier, but in a different way. ‘But we could be good for each other during our “liaison”, Jess. You’re a smart, beautiful and intelligent woman. One of the most interesting and intriguing I’ve ever met.’

Oh, you sweet-talking bastard, you!

‘Thank you … I think.’ The warmth from his fingers was doing dangerous things to her. That, and the nurturing feeling he evoked too. It was a fatal combination. ‘But why would I want to have a liaison or whatever with you? I know you’re handsome and rich, and you’re good at … very good at sex.’ She looked away. Those sea-blue eyes of his were hypnotic, and added to the touch of his fingers, and what she could only describe as his aura. She’d thought such a thing was the province of fiction, but it was real and it was turning her head. ‘But I’m not sure I’m a liaison type girl. Now I’ve … well … Now that I’m not a virgin any more, and I know I can enjoy sex, I think I probably want to look for a proper relationship now, not a temporary “thing”, you know?’

‘You are a sensual woman, Jess. But you barely know anything yet … I could help you change that.’ His voice was low and velvety, subtly cajoling. ‘Spend a few weeks with me, and I could teach you everything you need to know … So that when your proper relationship with Mr Right comes along, you’ll be able to blow his mind and have the best time in bed together right out of the gate, without a lot of fumbling and shyness and false starts.’

Oh, he was such an infuriating man. One minute beguiling her with his charm and his genuine kindness; the next arrogantly assuming all men wanted what he wanted, as if he were the last word on the preferences of his gender.

‘If a man really cared for me, he’d accept a bit of fumbling and shyness at first. He might like it, because it takes the pressure off him to be a superstar in bed,’ she countered.

‘A woman who’s a good lover helps a man to be a better lover. The days of men prizing virginity and scoring maidenheads like trophies are long past, Jess.’ He was sticking to his theme, which spoke to his desire for a nice little interlude of sex with her. But one with a solid get-out clause when he’d had enough.

‘So you didn’t really enjoy what we just did at all, very much, then? You’d have preferred it if I’d had certificates in the Kama Sutra. With honours.’

‘No! I didn’t say that! You were gorgeous … Very little fumbling at all, and not too much shyness.’ He winked at her outrageously and she suddenly wanted to punch him. ‘But with a sensual nature like yours, and the looks and body … and brain … to match, you could be out of this world, Jess, really.’

Jess glared at him. Or tried to. He was somehow sexier than ever when he was being obnoxious. ‘I don’t know whether to tell you to sod off, or take you up on your offer. Just to take advantage of you.’

‘I wish you would.’

‘No … I don’t think so. I think I’d prefer to muddle through in my own way.’ He was too confusing. She just wanted him out of the way. Nobody had ever made her feel so jumbled up. In any way, never mind sexually. She was safer with him far, far away from her.

Ellis shrugged. Even that slight movement was so erotic she almost gasped. ‘Very well,’ he said, rising to his feet, ‘I accept that. Not everyone’s way is my way.’ The devil, he was backing down now. She watched, expecting him to slip on his jacket and head for the door, but instead, he came around to her side of the table, and crouched down beside her, taking her hands in his again. ‘Just tell me you don’t regret what we did? At least not too much?’

‘No, I don’t.’ It was the truth. And now, with him so close, more than ever. He was beautiful.

‘One last kiss?’ With utter grace, he was suddenly on his knees.

Oh Ellis, you beast. You’re irresistible. A kiss, but don’t ask for more.

She nodded and leant forward. He cradled her head in the very lightest of holds and dusted a kiss like thistledown on her lips. It was so delicate it barely happened; so seductive it sent molten fire rampaging through her. Deep in her belly, desire gouged at her, effortlessly reignited. Not stopping to think, she dug her fingers into his thick, silky hair, and drew his mouth to hers again. This time, his tongue quested, asking for entrance; which she granted.

Without her knowing quite how he’d achieved it, he drew her down, out of the chair, and onto the kitchen rug, still kissing her. She wound her arms around him, her tongue jabbing at his, fighting back. The line of his back was strong and lithe beneath her hands as she ran her them up and down, caressing him through his waistcoat and trousers.

He broke the kiss, heaving for breath. ‘Jess, I know you don’t want much of anything more to do with me, but please, let me love you one more time. Let me show you how it can be. Just the once. I won’t bother you again. I owe you this!’

His mouth came down hard on hers again, the kiss devouring. Even if she’d been able to speak, Jess knew that she wouldn’t have had to tell him the answer was yes.

She knew that he knew. How could she say no? His mouth, his body, his hands, they were like forces of nature that swept her onwards, brushing aside all qualms. A born again wanton, she swirled her hips against him as he kissed her, loving the jut of his erection and the way her shimmy-dance made him moan like a wild thing.

It was only when his hand slid inside her robe, pushing it open, that she snapped open her eyes and saw the weird stain on the kitchen ceiling that looked like Australia, that she remembered exactly where they were.

‘For God’s sake, Ellis,’ she hissed, pushing him off her and clutching at her robe, ‘we’re in the kitchen. We can’t do it here. Cathy might hear us and come down any minute.’

Ellis sprang to his feet, reaching down to draw her up too. Plucking at the revers of her robe, he set it aright and tugged her sash back into place. ‘Come on then,’ he said, taking her hand, ‘we’ll have to go back to your room.’

‘I don’t know …’

‘Oh yes, you do. You’re right on the same page as me, Jess.’ She was already moving, compelled by his eyes as much as the way he urged her forward. ‘Give me one chance to show you a better time.’

‘Okay.’

She followed him up the stairs, grimacing at how loud their footsteps sounded. They’d crept down, but they were thundering up, and predictably, a voice rang out.

‘Jess! Is everything all right?’

Ah, Cathy!

‘Yes, everything’s fine. Go back to sleep. Sorry about the noise.’

‘Don’t worry about it, kid. It’s about bloody time. Have fun!’

‘Oh bollocks,’ whispered Jess.

‘Don’t worry,’ said Ellis, low and almost laughing. ‘Sounds like she’s on our side.’ He pushed open the bedroom door and drew Jess inside.

‘But she might hear us!’

‘We’ll have to try and be quiet. You’ll have to contain your screams of ecstasy.’ Ellis’s hands slid under her robe, cupping her buttocks as his mouth came down on hers again.

‘What about your screams of ecstasy?’ Jess countered, in between kisses.

‘I’ll just have to bite my lip, won’t I?’ His hands tightened on her bottom, squeezing and manipulating her cheeks. The sensation made her blush. It was so exciting, so naughty, especially when he rubbed his crotch against her belly at the same time.

They kissed for a few moments, rocking against each other until Jess was gasping. It was like a spring winding inside her again, sensation gathering and gathering. Her pussy ached. The desire to be touched was like a madness in her blood and she grabbed at Ellis’s hand and drew it between her legs, hitching her thighs apart a little at the same time so she could jam his fingers against her.

‘Oh yes … oh yes …’ he crooned, ‘that’s right, beautiful Jess. Take what you want. Demand it. It’s your right.’ Nimble fingertips worked their way through her pubic hair and found her centre, making her squeak at the contact, she was so primed for it. Ellis’s other hand shot to her lips, silencing her with a touch of his forefinger. ‘Hush … keep it inside. It’ll feel better … I promise you.’

His fingertips rocked and circled, just as her hips rocked and circled. She was wet already, in the zone, so quickly her mind couldn’t keep up.

‘Good … oh sweetheart. Are you there yet? I bet you are. Just relax and let it happen. It’s so easy, so easy.’

His voice and hand made it easy. It’d never been this way before. Even in her fantasies with Dream Lover she’d had to work for it.

You are Dream Lover, you bastard!

Burying her face in his shoulder, clamping her teeth together, she came hard, her pussy pulsing and fluttering against his touch. Her knees lost all strength but he flung his free hand around her waist and kept her upright.

‘Right … let’s get down on the rug. Less noisy than bedsprings.’

While she was still reeling from the sensations, he manhandled her to the bedside rug, settling her down with beautiful gentleness, and then dragging the pillows off the bed so she could rest her head on them.

‘Have you got a thing about doing it on the floor?’

‘I’ve got a thing about doing it.’ Ellis grinned, settling himself beside her. ‘Anywhere would be paradise with you, gorgeous.’ He reached down and quickly cupped her sex, the gesture tender, almost companionable. ‘But I want to take you to paradise too … while I’m in you.’

Kicking off his shoes, he unzipped his trousers and shimmied out of them, then dragged his underwear off over his feet too. Jess’s eyes widened when he shoved his shirttails out of the way and his cock bounced up, looking bigger and harder than ever, if that were possible.

‘I hope you’ve got another condom for that thing,’ Jess said, watching the rigid flesh sway, primitive yet elegant.

‘Don’t worry, I’m always ready.’ From the pocket of his waistcoat, he flipped out a familiar package.

I’ll bet you are. Always prepared for the next panting woman who falls at your feet.

But why be irked by that? She knew the score. He wasn’t making any promises, just offering her no-strings ‘educational’ sex.

Ellis tossed the condom to her, but flustered, she dropped it on her belly.

‘You should put it on me this time. That’s another thing you need to be able to do for Mr Right when he appears.’ He lounged back on the rug, a male odalisque.

‘All right, but you’ll have to keep it still.’

‘Haven’t you practised on a banana?’

She spluttered with laughter. ‘No! Of course I haven’t! I’ve got better things to do with bananas.’

‘Of course you have.’ He grasped his cock, as if offering it to her. ‘And it’s much better to practise on the real thing anyway … But be gentle with me, eh?’

She had a good mind to grab him and give him a good shake, but even she knew that that mighty male staff needed very mindful handling.

Gingerly, she tore open the packet. The thing would be useless if she ripped it, and it felt very slithery in her fingers. Odd, but not unpleasant to the touch, very slick. Instinctively, she pinched the teat, then set the contraceptive over the broad tip of Ellis’s cock.

‘Good, now roll it down. That’s right. I won’t break, actually … you’re doing great.’

The fine latex rolled down his length with ease. A piece of cake! Admiring her handiwork, she started to lie down on the rug, in readiness.

‘No, I think you should be on top this time, Jess. You should ride me.’