Signing a book contract can be just the thing to invoke creative paralysis—I know, for that is exactly what happened to me! One month after signing on the dotted line and manifesting my heart’s deepest desire, I was locked up harder than a … who-knows-what. I have to tell you, it was terrifying! Thank Goddess this isn’t the first time I’ve been down this road, so I decided not to panic. Instead, I pulled out my surfboard and surfer shorts and rode the tsunami until the seas were calm again.
What is it about starting a new canvas, page or fabric piece that can be so unnerving for me? Staring into the blank abyss has been known to elicit feelings of inadequacy, incompetence and panic. The “white void,” as I call it, has the power to wake the dancing gremlins, tickle their toes and send them into a wild frenzy!
When looking into that void, we are standing at a creative crossroads and wondering which direction to go. For some people, this is the place where the creative edge lives; for others, it can become a time when we decide to clean house—literally. I am just guessing that some of you might know what I mean here. The truth is, no matter how comfortable we are with the great white void, there will probably be a time when we too will choose to scrub the toilet or polish the silver set our grandmother gave us (that has been sitting in a drawer unused for ten years) instead of facing that blank canvas. With that said, let’s look at some fun, interactive ways to move past the dreaded color white, so you can set your compass and find your true creative north.
WARM-UP
I confess I am a simmerer. “What the heck is that?” you might ask. A simmerer is someone whose creativity bubbles up inside them until the creative pot boils over. This simmering process can run anywhere from a couple days to a couple weeks, and the time frame is often dependent on a looming deadline. This is my creative style, and I used to get down on myself for it until I realized that simmering and a little warm-up exercise go a long way in loosening my creative juices.
Athletes warm up and stretch their bodies before any event so they can be flexible and mentally prepared for the challenge ahead. Well, guess what? Warming up our creative muscles is just as important! Getting the juices flowing and allowing for unreserved expression, by making a big unbridled mess, can help us tackle our fear of the great white void and support us in diving into the unknown. Accidents are a huge part of this process. Most artistic types are all too ready to pull out the magic wand (a.k.a., the eraser) and say, “Oh, it’s not perfect. That line isn’t straight.” So, out comes the eraser, faster than you can say “disappearing ink,” and the perceived imperfection is gone. Have you ever noticed the chatter that is just underneath that one task? What might happen if we left the crooked line alone and saw the mistake as an opportunity or a new door that might have opened to something really unique? Do you think Benjamin Franklin or Albert Einstein figured things out perfectly the first time, or do you think they made a heck of a lot of happy accidents that led them to their breakthroughs and discoveries? Why should it be any different for us?
Back to the book; I invited eleven other talented artists to participate in my project. WOW! It has been quite humbling, to say the least. I’ve known several of these phenomenal artists since my rubberstamp business days—way back when—but others were gracious enough to say yes to a perfect stranger. So here we see the root of the block and it goes deep into the soil like a bad weed we can’t get rid of but won’t use chemicals to eradicate; it is the weed of COMPARISON—comparing our art to others’ art! All sorts of voices could be heard in my head, shouting their ill advisement at “Critics Corporate Headquarters.” Working with others in this way set me back a few years to some old familiar ways. As a coach and therapist, I work all day helping people with just this issue, so it was time for me to “walk my talk” and do battle with the lies my internal critics were telling me. And so I chose to cross the great divide as a warrioress sets out on the heroine’s journey. I knew how to do battle with these demons, and so, like the goddess Kali, I pulled out my trusty creative sword and gathered my tools: a large roll of newsprint paper, paints and oil pastels.
I began using this little trick the day I decided I didn’t have to be a photographer to express my vision—that in spite of what I had been told, I could in fact learn to paint. The first few paintings were kind of frightening, to be sure, but I had a few rules I created around this: 1) Just keep painting even if it looks like mud. 2) Date it, title it. 3) Put it in the closet, and don’t show anyone! I kept at this process for almost nine months, a gestation period of sorts, and when I came out the other side, I was actually amazed by the results. The images were very mythical and archetypal. I did not take a class—which I knew would have locked me up even more by impressing the importance of color theory and design—I just painted my heart out! I now teach this approach to people who want to begin to find their own artistic voice without using other people’s images. Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against using other people’s images, stamps or angel clip art; in fact I do this all the time in my journal work, but I also believe inside of us we have a story that is uniquely our own and waiting to be told.
I am happy to report that once I “let it rip” on the newsprint, the creative pot finally boiled over and has not stopped! This, combined with a loving coaching session with my book editor and duct-taping the critics’ mouths! To be sure, I know they are in there trying desperately to get the duct tape off, but I know I have the key to unlock my heart, and so I keep my creative sword at the ready. I am never without a few nasty cheap brushes, acrylic paints and a roll of newsprint. There is nothing like a warm-up to find your way back to center and your creative heart and soul.
TARP OR PIECE OF DRYWALL TO TAPE YOUR PAPER TO
ROLL OF NEWSPRINT OR A NEWSPRINT PAD NO SMALLER THAN 16” X 20” (41CM X 51CM)
INSPIRING MUSIC AND A CANDLE
INEXPENSIVE BRUSHES
ACRYLIC CRAFT PAINTS (INEXPENSIVE)
WATER
WATER-SOLUBLE OIL PASTELS (PORTFOLIO SERIES IS A GREAT CHOICE)
-1- LAY OUT OR HANG YOUR TARP. I WORKED ON MY KNEES FOR A LONG TIME IN OUR SPARE BEDROOM BEFORE I HAD MY OWN STUDIO. SOMETHING ABOUT IT WAS ACTUALLY VERY GROUNDING.
-2- TAPE THE FOUR CORNERS OF YOUR PAPER TO THE TARP OR YOUR DRYWALL.
-3- HAVE ALL BRUSHES, A LARGE CONTAINER OF WATER AND SEVERAL DIFFERENT TUBES OF ACRYLIC AND OIL PASTELS PLACED ON THE TARP.
-4- TURN ON YOUR MOST ENERGIZING AND INSPIRING MUSIC AND LIGHT A CANDLE. CLOSE YOUR EYES, TAKE A FEW DEEP BREATHS AND REPEAT THIS AFFIRMATION: EVERYTHING I NEED IS ALREADY INSIDE ME. I AM AN ENDLESS CREATIVE WELL.”
-5- OPEN YOUR EYES AND CHOOSE THE FIRST COLOR THAT CALLS TO YOU. DIVE IN, MAKE SOME MUD, START PAINTING. ADD SOME OIL PASTELS. SCRIBBLE, MAKE LINES, MARKS. DO YOU SEE SHAPES? IF SO, BRING THEM FORWARD, EVEN IF THEY MAKE NO SENSE.
-6- IF THE PAPER TEARS… SO BE IT: IF THE COLORS TURN TO MUD … IT’S PART OF THE PROCESS. WHEN THE CRITICS AND GREMLINS ARE DOING THEIR DANCE, GET OUT THE DUCT TAPE AND REPEAT YOUR AFFIRMATION, “I AM AN ENDLESS CREATIVE WELL.”
-7- THIS IS NOT ABOUT CREATING A WORK OF ART: THIS WORK IS ONLY FOR YOU. DON’T SHOW IT TO ANYONE—THEY LIKELY WON’T “GET IT,” AND YOU’RE OPENING YOURSELF UP TO A SABOTAGING MOMENT. THIS IS ABOUT WARMING UP THOSE CREATIVE MUSCLES SO YOU CAN FIND YOUR TRUE NORTH AND OPEN THE GATE TO CREATIVE FREEDOM.
After completing my own warm-up, I decided to dive right in and just go for it. I made five sections on the Clayboard, using a ruler and light pastel pencil line. For the background, I coated the substrate with different washes of acrylics (Cerulean Blue, Yellow Ochre and Titan Buff).
To make the two moons, I created circular stencils out of paper. I then spread a wash of Cerulean Blue over the tops of the moons.
In a paperdoll-like design, I created a line of houses and vines from newsprint. Then I stained the paper with Sumi ink and a light wash of rust glaze. I outlined the elements with oil pastels and allowed it to dry.
I continued adding layers of washes and paints until I was happy with the effect, allowing all layers to dry thoroughly between color applications. I love to sand with fine sandpaper between layers to add texture and design.
Using gel medium, I adhered the houses-and-vines row to the board and then painted Titan Buff and Yellow Ochre circles on the bottom section of the substrate.
Once everything was dry, I used sandpaper to scratch over the two moons and the circles on the bottom section. I used a black gel glaze pen to draw in the flowers.
Finally, using graphite and pastel pencils, I drew a bird. Yes … I did say drew. Are you quivering? Here is the exciting news: It can wash off or erase easily, so I wasn’t afraid to take the risk. You could do it too. Imagine you are five again, when you knew exactly what a bird looked like. Stretch your wings and fly. You can do it! I then colored in the different aspects of the bird using paint. When everything was dry, I added my phrase using alphabet rubber stamps and distressing ink.