He who conquers others is strong; he who conquers himself is mighty.
—LAO-TZU, CHINESE PHILOSOPHER
BY 2010, Tim Jones, the architect I mentioned earlier, had pretty much reached rock bottom.
Two broken marriages and years of alcoholism had taken their toll on his health, his work, and his soul. “I was just a wreck,” Tim said. “I mean, financially, emotionally, physically, spiritually, I was just a disaster.”
With the help of Alcoholics Anonymous, Tim managed to sober up, but he was far from happy. “I was fifty-two at the time, and I didn’t quite know what to do. I just knew what I didn’t want to do anymore.”
The turning point for Tim would come, as it has for many others, in the form of a book. In his case, the book was Secrets of the Millionaire Mind by T. Harv Eker.
“It was October 31, Halloween,” Tim recalled, “and I read it in one day. I sat down at nine o’clock in the morning, and I didn’t leave my kitchen bar stool for the next nine hours.
“I noticed in the back of the book there was a number I could call to go to this event called the Millionaire Mind Intensive. I had no idea what that was. I didn’t know who Harv was. I didn’t know anything. But he said that if I called this number I would get two free tickets, so I did.”
Six weeks later, Tim would find himself at a local convention center attending the Millionaire Mind Intensive event. That event led to others, and Tim began to slowly connect with a vision for his life and to learn increasingly more about business and personal development. Little by little, idea by idea, skill by skill, Tim changed how he thought and what he did.
Those years weren’t always easy—in fact, they would at times be a roller-coaster ride for Tim. To reinvent himself, he pawned his classic guitar. Then his wedding ring. Then his car.
But he persevered. Today, not only is he still sober, but he’s also a published author, and his architecture business is growing quickly. He’s earning more money than he ever has. He got back his ring, guitar, and car (in that order), but best of all, he’s happy. “My life is unimaginable,” Tim says now. “If you saw me five years ago, you would not in your wildest dreams think that I could be sitting where I am right now. I love my life.”
For all the ups and downs and the myriad things Tim did to pivot, when you trace the path of Tim’s reinvention, it always leads back to one thing: the book. And he’s not alone. Tim is one of many of the thousands of people I’ve worked with who trace the transformation in their lives back to a book. For some, it was the same book Tim read, Secrets of the Millionaire Mind. For others it was Napoleon Hill’s classic Think and Grow Rich. For others it was the books of Tony Robbins, Tim Ferriss, or Deepak Chopra. The list is almost endless.
But in the end it’s about the book. The book that made the difference. Tipped the scales. Awakened a long-dormant dream or, perhaps more than anything else, gave hope that maybe I can change my life, too. It’s one of the reasons I wrote this book—in the hope that I can help you change your life for the better.
Years ago, after the experience of believing I was having a heart attack and about to leave this world, I made a decision to make my life more like what I had dreamed it would be when I was a kid. It was a Big-D decision, fueled by my experience at the hospital and the resulting realization that I was deeply unhappy with my life.
Of course, I had no idea of what my new direction would be. All that I knew was that my current course wasn’t taking me anywhere I wanted to go. I began questioning everything, but when it became clear that I didn’t have the answers, I began reading.
Some of my early discovery tools were books such as The Road Less Traveled by Dr. M. Scott Peck and Awaken the Giant Within by Tony Robbins. I read books on stock trading and real estate; on personal development, such as Michael Mantell’s Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff; and on spirituality, such as The Seven Day Mental Diet by Emmet Fox.
During this period, my friend Sandy handed me a copy of Secrets of the Millionaire Mind—the same book that would begin Tim’s transformation. I didn’t read it right away—the title seemed to be focused on something that wasn’t all that important to me—but eventually I did crack it open and begin reading. I read it and then read it again. By the time three months had passed, I had read the book ragged. It wasn’t just about money or becoming wealthy but was focused on the inner workings of the mind and the “thermostat” setting that controls our decisions about money and success. It was about money, but . . . it wasn’t. It was, I realized, about everything.
Eventually my buddy dragged me to the New Peaks seminar that is a companion to Harv’s book, the Millionaire Mind Intensive (MMI). I couldn’t have anticipated what happened, but something shifted for me during the MMI program. I realized that there was a huge part of me that I was unaware of and a huge part of my life that I was not yet living. My mind was blown wide open.
It was that training program that marked the beginning of my journey with New Peaks and my pivot from an unhappy, unhealthy attorney to a program trainer and eventually a CEO. The program was a mind-opening, emotional experience for me. I was introduced to ways of seeing my life and the world that were entirely new, yet resonated with me so profoundly that I knew I would never be the same.
One of my most vivid memories is the sense of humility it gave me. I realized that I had so far to go and there was so much for me to learn. I had barely scratched the surface of what there was to know in life. I was humbled but at the same time incredibly empowered, and in that moment I made a commitment that I would continue my learning.
At that point I had been a lawyer for many years. I’d finished my education. I’d passed my bar exams. School had been great, make no mistake—I’d met my future wife, gotten my law degree, built a career. But it was something I saw as both functional and over. I had no intention of going back.
That weekend at MMI, I saw things differently for the first time. A journey that had begun with something as simple as a book had ended with a decision: Not only did I want to become a student again, but I wanted to become a lifelong student.
My commitment to constant improvement was a pivotal moment and a Big-D decision that has truly defined the rest of my life. And I’m not alone. Consider, for example:
• Di Riseborough’s decision to face, and then forgive, the man who brutally murdered her grandmother.
• Keith Leon’s choice to let go of “the plan” so he could pivot after a failed product launch.
• Kristina Paider’s choice to face her fear so she could live her dream life.
• Barbara Niven’s pivot to become an actress despite the limitations of being a single mother.
• Marie’s decision to take the first steps and start her animal rescue facility.
• Kevin Ward’s reinvention as a trainer and coach.
• Dr. Venus’s rise from the streets to become an inspirational leader and entrepreneur.
Every one of these stories, like all the others in this book, is wildly different yet fundamentally the same. Each is a story of growth. Find someone who has pivoted, and you’ve found someone who has made a decision to grow. Whether it’s to gain the knowledge of a new industry, to understand themselves better, to build new habits, or to let go of fear or past hurts, every single person who pivots grows.
The same decision is before you now. To pivot is to grow. Are you willing to commit to personal growth?
PIVOT POINT: To pivot is to grow.
Growth is never free.
Yes, it may come at no charge. But it’s never free. Personal growth is an exchange. In order to grow, you must give something. In return, you gain the knowledge, insight, freedom, vision, or peace that comes from having grown.
There are three forms of exchange in the growth “equation.” If you expect to grow, you must offer at least one of these in return:
• Time.
• Money.
• Emotion.
Each one is an investment. It’s a willing gift of something you have in exchange for a return. That return is growth and, as a result, momentum. The more you grow, the faster you build momentum in your reinvention.
PIVOT POINT: The more you grow, the faster you build momentum.
Hear the word investment, and you’ll almost certainly think money. But not only is money not the only form of investment, it might be the least important when it comes to your pivot. In fact, believing that you need to spend a lot of money to pivot is a shortcut to never starting.
Some of the best ways to educate yourself and grow are free. You can find millions of books for free through your library. And now you can do much of what you’d previously have done in a library without leaving your home.
Through the wonder of online learning, you can study under some of the greatest minds of our time, at some of the greatest schools in the world, with nothing more than the Internet and a willingness to grow. From Yale and Harvard to MIT and Berkeley, the list of open courses that are available to anyone willing to sign up is growing steadily. Sites such as the Khan Academy offer a “free, world-class education for anyone, anywhere.”
Want to start a business? You can learn the entire content of an MBA program for free by reading books such as The Personal MBA. But why worry about the MBA? You can take any number of online entrepreneurial programs and connect with other like-minded entrepreneurs around the world.
All these things can be done for free. All they require is your time.
Some of the most profound teachings in the world are free. From the libraries full of great books written over the centuries to online courses and the mentorship of wise people, you can make never-ending growth part of your entire life without spending a cent.
But you can do it a lot faster if you’re also willing to invest financially.
When I spoke with Kevin Ward, who’d gone from earning $800 in his first launch to $75,000 in his coaching and training business for real estate professionals, he was still absolutely committed to his own growth.
Recall that Kevin had started his pivot with growth. “I had stopped investing in myself,” he said, and it was an insight that changed his future. Kevin started small, reading books on personal growth and eventually attending seminars. And now? He’s spent over $70,000 on his own personal growth in the last twelve months.
Money is a growth multiplier.
• You can borrow an inspirational book from the library, but when you buy it, you get to keep it, make notes in it, and revisit it as often and for as long as you like.
• You can buy the book and read it, but when you attend the transformational lectures and programs of the personal growth authors of our time, you get even more from the same content. You build relationships and discover a whole new level of personal growth.
• You can contact someone who’s done what you want to do—an entrepreneur, a writer, an athlete. But when you travel to meet him or her in person, you reach a whole new level of commitment and momentum and discover new opportunities that might have taken years to do without that travel expense.
• You can meet someone once. But when you pay a coach to regularly hold you accountable to your plans, you can build momentum at an accelerated rate.
Money is a growth multiplier. It accelerates and magnifies growth to get you better results faster. And it often means you’re not alone. The more you spend on your personal development, the more time you’ll spend with other people, the more you’ll collaborate, the more you’ll learn, and the more momentum you’ll build.
The beautiful thing about investing financially is that there’s an entry point for every budget. Your personal growth spending is scalable, too—as you earn more, you can spend more and grow more.
The key is to start. Education should be part of your ritual: How much can you afford each month? Decide, and set that amount of money aside. You can increase it later, but don’t let Kevin’s daunting $70,000 scare you off. Remember that at one point he was reading books in his rented room.
The more you grow, the more you grow; money is momentum in dollar form.
Do you have to invest financially to grow? No. But if you’re serious about pivoting, you need to grow. And if you’re serious about growing, you can do it faster by spending.
PIVOT POINT: Money is a growth multiplier.
Another investment you can make that does not require risking money is to invest emotionally. Many aspects of pivoting—in case you haven’t noticed—are about stretching yourself emotionally. For example:
• Doing the work of letting go of the past is an emotional investment.
• Having an honest discussion with your partner about your vision for the first time and asking for his or her support is an emotional investment.
• Sharing your writing with the world is an emotional investment.
• Contacting a stranger to ask for help is an emotional investment.
• Performing a song you wrote at a local café’s open-mic night is an emotional investment.
• Changing a long-held belief is an emotional investment.
None of these things requires money. Most don’t even require much time. But they do require the guts to do them. They’re an emotional stretch, but they also do incredible things for your momentum.
• If you can share one story, or song, you can share more.
• If you can approach one stranger, you can approach more.
• If you can change your mind once, you can do it again.
• If you can do anything once—you can do it again.
And there’s momentum: your feet moving, your life changing, your vision coming closer. Just like that.
No one growth investment is necessarily better than another. Each return you desire might demand a different type of exchange. Sometimes all three working in tandem is best. And sometimes the one you want to give the least is the one needed the most. Most pivots require at least some of each. Your pivot will have its own blend, but make no mistake: It will require growth.
PIVOT POINT: Sometimes the investment you least want to make is the one you most need to make.
But where should you make your investment of time, money, and emotions? Here are three key areas.
For the lowest risk and the cheapest price, reading is a favorite starting place. I can say, without question, that books have changed my life. The simple act of reading a free book that a friend handed me changed the course of my future—all for the price tag of an open mind and a few comfortable hours in a favorite chair.
If you’re looking for a starting point for books to build momentum in your pivot, let me suggest the following list:
Secrets of the Millionaire Mind by T. Harv Eker
The Road Less Traveled by M. Scott Peck
Awaken the Giant Within by Anthony Robbins
Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill
The Untethered Soul by Michael A. Singer
Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff by Michael Mantell
The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle
The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho
Karmic Management by Geshe Michael Roach and Lama Christie McNally
The Other F Word by Juliana Ericson
Start with Why by Simon Sinek
The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success by Deepak Chopra
Autobiography of a Yogi by Paramahansa Yogananda
Delivering Happiness by Tony Hsieh
Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki with Sharon Lechter
Outwitting the Devil by Napoleon Hill
The Seven Day Mental Diet by Emmet Fox
Most you can read for free via your library. Some are available online for free as well. Regardless, each is a treasure trove of growth.
I can’t imagine how I would have grown enough to pivot without the many workshops, courses, and training programs I took when I began my reinvention.
The higher level of accountability, the commitment, and the heightened energy level of a room full of like-minded people are just the starting points for the amazing growth experience of a seminar. Add to that the relationships that can be built and the relief of discovering you’re not alone, and training programs are an extraordinary growth opportunity.
You can find more information on New Peaks training programs at www.newpeaks.com.
Humility is powerful. At times, the best possible growth choice is simply to decide, “I can’t get there without help.”
Although the “pivot people” from Chapter 9 are an essential part of your pivot, there may come a time when you need to invest in professional help to further your growth.
A coach is someone who can be more objective than you can. Your coach can show you things you’ve never considered, expose your blind spots, and help you implement the powerful pivot strategies you’ve learned in this book.
If you’ve been an employee for most of your life, you’ll especially appreciate the level of accountability that a coach brings to the changes you’re trying to make. If your pivot is to start a business, for example, it can be difficult to build new habits and make progress without someone to hold you to your goals.
Who will ensure that you finish the five hundred words a day you need to write in order to complete your novel?
Who will hold you to the deadline for the app you’re building each evening?
Who will tell you the truth about your progress on your business plan?
A coach can do all those things and more.
Whatever proportion of time, money, or emotion you choose to invest, and wherever you choose to invest it, it’s important to have a plan.
Just like investing for your financial future, your growth future needs to take a priority position. We can take a lesson from the pay-yourself-first mantra of financial planning and do the same for your growth plan.
• Schedule your growth, just as you’d schedule a retirement fund payment. Create the time in your calendar. Make reading time, coaching time, and training time priorities.
• Direct your resources, just as you would in planning your finances. If you don’t set money aside for growth, it won’t be there when you need it.
• Balance your investment of time, money, and emotions. Pivoting will almost certainly require all three.
PIVOT POINT: Growth requires a plan.
I’ve pivoted many times. I have owned and been part of a multistate law practice, a title insurance company, a commercial real estate investment firm, a restaurant, an Internet start-up, and a personal development seminar company. Some reinventions were small, others were more all-encompassing, but each was a pivot in its own right.
Your pivot, like mine, will probably be built from many smaller pivots. The path from corporate IT manager to entrepreneur, for example, isn’t one step; it’s many. It’s a series of small pivots that stack up to one life-changing reinvention. The road from full-time teacher to choreographer doesn’t happen with one decision but with many.
You can think of each shift, each step, each decision, as building your capacity for one single master skill: pivotability—the willingness to change, in the face of uncertainty, the current course of your life.
PIVOT POINT: Pivotability is the willingness to change, in the face of uncertainty, the current course of your life.
Pivotability is just growth packaged in the form of life change. Every time you pivot a little, you grow a little. Every time you grow a little, you build the capacity to pivot a little. And through it all, you gain momentum. You learn a little, progress a little more. With each bit of growth, you add more energy to the flywheel of momentum, causing it to spin faster.
With time, you develop pivotability into a huge muscle that you can bring to bear on the most fundamental building blocks of your life—your health, your relationships, your work—to align them with your purpose. It’s all possible, simply by deciding that to pivot is also to grow. Every single person who pivots grows.
In the same way, the reverse is true: Every time you grow a little, you pivot a little. It means that every effort you make to grow builds momentum in your pivot.
After a near-fatal car accident at the age of nineteen, Brendon Burchard learned that when we’re faced with the end of our lives, we ask ourselves what he calls life’s last three questions: Did I live? Did I love? and Did I matter?
Brendon has been affiliated with Peaks since 2010. He is a motivational speaker and the bestselling author of Life’s Golden Ticket and The Charge, and it has been wonderful to have him aligned with us in our mission to help people discover their purpose.
The great Jim Rohn once said, “Your level of success will rarely exceed your level of personal development,” and Brendon is a testament to the truth of Jim’s words. As Brendon told Larry King, “I don’t believe in goal-based coaching, which is ‘What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?’ I’m more interested in ‘Who do you want to become?’ ”
Who do you want to become?
Sure, improving your life is a compelling motive. Almost everyone can envision a bigger home. A better car. More money. Bigger muscles. But, as Brendon knows, when you focus only on those things, you’re missing the most important distinguishing feature of people who have long, happy, successful lives: a focus on personal development.
I teach our students the acronym CANSI, which stands for Constant And Never-ending Self-Improvement. It’s a reminder that behind every successful pivot is a choice to keep growing. Don’t know what to do next? Grow. Feeling stuck? Grow. Experienced a setback? Grow. There’s no downside. As Teawna Pinard said of her pivot, “I didn’t really have a plan. I just knew I had to keep developing myself.”