Gabrielle emerged from the Fifty-ninth Street subway station and into the summer sun smiling. It was a beautiful June morning, and for the first time in a very long time she felt happy. The pain of losing Helene had dulled to a manageable ache, mainly due to Bea’s unwavering love and attention. She’d even grown accustomed to Stephanie and her ever-changing moods. Yes, things were going better than she could have ever wished. True, she wasn’t a model yet, but at least she had a job—a job that for nearly four months she’d proven to be very good at.
Gabrielle was proud of herself. She was succeeding without anyone realizing her secret. With her co-workers’ help it had taken her only two days to memorize the placement of every variety of muffin and bagel the shop sold. While the rest of the staff read the handwritten signs, Gabrielle developed her own system of counting over, down, and up to arrive at the requested item.
“Hey, wait up,” a familiar voice called. Gabrielle turned to see one of her co-workers.
“Hi. Marta, you’re in early today.”
“I need at least two cups of java before feeding time.”
“What’s this?” Gabrielle asked, pointing to the huge banner hanging above the shop’s doors. “Free—” she said, reading aloud the only word she recognized. Through the years she had acquired a small vocabulary of words she identified on sight. Words like “stop,” “exit,” “in,” “out,” “women,” “men.” For Gabrielle, trying to decipher the rest of the banner’s copy was like trying to solve one of her favorite jigsaw puzzles without all the necessary pieces.
“ ‘Free coffee with every purchase. Today only,’ ” Marta recited, cutting Gabrielle off. “Has Louie lost his mind? There’s going to be a stampede in this joint.”
“Marta, Gabrielle,” a new voice called out to them as they entered the shop. “I’m Paul, your new manager,” he told them, his voice cracking slightly. Paul had recognized the two from Louie’s description.
“Where’s Louie?” Marta asked.
The new manager. Gabrielle’s heart sank. A new manager meant new rules and new problems.
“Uncle—I mean Louie’s opening up a franchise on the East Side, so I’ll be running this place. We’ve got a lot to do before the store opens, so shall we get started?” he asked, trying to sound authoritative, but failing miserably. “First off, Marta will help in the back with the inventory. Gabrielle will stay out front with Chuck, who’ll work the cash register,” he said, avoiding her eyes.
“What’s up with the free coffee?” Marta asked, dreading the idea of spending the day counting flour sacks with this geek.
“It’s just a promotional gimmick to get us some attention. There’s a new gourmet bakery opening up down the block. By the way, I added five new muffins and reorganized the trays this morning. I don’t know what system you’ve been using, but I think you’ll find that by arranging everything alphabetically, things will run more efficiently.”
Reorganized the trays! Gabrielle felt light-headed. It would take her days to memorize the new arrangement. But she had no other choice. Doing inventory was definitely not an option. She’d have to stay out front and do her best. She just hoped it was good enough.
“Paul, would you write down the names of the new muffins?” Gabrielle asked. “That way I can push the new flavors right away until I get them memorized.”
“Now, that’s the kind of thinking I like.”
Marta coughed to get Gabrielle’s attention and with a smile began rubbing the tip of her nose. Gabrielle smiled and stuck out her tongue in response. Marta might be teasing her for being a brownnoser, but she wasn’t after brownie points. If Gabrielle had the letter combinations in front of her, she could match them with the words on the tray cards.
I can do this, Gabrielle told herself as she took her position behind the counter and began trying to sort out the stock in front of her. She was able to locate the first two flavors on the list before being interrupted by a customer.
“Morning. Carrot muffin, please.”
“Sure.” Gabrielle’s eyes scouted the trays until they came to rest on C-A-R-R-O-T. The orange bits of color confirmed her find.
“There you go. Hi, Denny.”
“Good morning, Gabrielle. I’ll have my usual, please.”
Gabrielle knew that Denny’s usual was an apple-oat-bran muffin with cream cheese. The problem was, she just didn’t know where to locate it. They sold apple, banana, and just plain oat-bran muffins. They all looked the same with white oats sprinkled on top. How can I tell which is which? Gabrielle was beginning to feel flustered. Paul’s coffee incentive was working. There were at least a dozen people standing in front of her, and they were obviously in a hurry.
“You wanna get a move on? I got a job to get to,” someone yelled out.
“Over here. To the left,” Denny prompted, pointing to the correct tray.
“Thanks. I’m sorry. We reorganized this morning. Everything is in a different place,” she apologized loud enough for the others to hear.
“Do you think you can find me two pecan muffins?” the next man in line asked.
Gabrielle looked over the baked goods in front of her, hoping that the pecan muffins would somehow make themselves known to her. She looked at Paul’s list again in search of a clue. Nothing.
“Look, honey, are you going to stand there all day or what?”
“Forget this. Free coffee or not, I don’t have time to wait,” declared one woman as she departed the store in a huff.
“Read the signs, honey. Everything’s marked.”
Read the signs. Read the signs. The words paralyzed her.
“Hello. Can I get some service here? I’d like my damn muffins.”
READ THE SIGNS, she commanded her brain. Gabrielle stood frozen behind the counter, staring in vain at the trays in front of her. Panic and shame washed over her. She really thought she could pull it off—work in the real world, like a normal person. Who was she trying to kid? She wasn’t normal. She was a freak.
“Hey, what the hell? What about my order?”
“Can we get some help here?”
Hearing the commotion, Paul stepped out front in time to see a small mob of hungry customers waiting noisily to be served and the back of Gabrielle’s head as she ran sobbing out the door.