7

 

Monday, work was a blur. The emotions of the weekend had left me exhausted. Arriving home, I decided soup and sandwiches sounded like a winner for supper. After our meal, Elianna headed straight for the computer. She had a paper due soon. Griffey plopped into his recliner, and I wiggled into my spot on the couch. He aimed the remote and surfed until he found a football game, and I picked up my book ready to lose myself in the story.

“Oh, hon,” Griffey said.

I looked over the top of my book, brows raised.

“Sherri, the one with the son with Down’s Syndrome …”

I nodded. “Yeah, she’s in my Bible study group.”

“She came to see me today. She wants the church to host a seminar where she’ll encourage others with special needs children. She also wants to train some people in our church to work with individuals with special needs and their families. I told her I would pray about it.”

I sat up straight. “We need to support this ministry! She will bless many people through it.”

Griffey looked me in the eyes and raised his brows in a questioning manner. I knew he wondered if I had seen a vision. I smiled and nodded vigorously.

“I see…I better give Sherri a call tomorrow.”

Griffey’s positive reaction to my recommendation gave me a proud feeling. Normally, he’s the one with the sage advice. This time it was me.

Thursday lunch couldn’t come fast enough. I needed to vent to Emily, so I decided to call her instead.

“You had quite a weekend,” she finally said after my lengthy update.

“You have no idea.” How had I left so much out? I continued to give her all the details. “My father just showed up Saturday. Then I had a vision about his salvation experience.” I paused, ashamed to admit my failing. Well, the Bible says confess your faults to one another. “I’m glad it worked out because I sure didn’t encourage him.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, Addy. A vision can’t erase thirty years of pain.”

“I know, but I feel that is my responsibility with these visions. I’m supposed to encourage the person.”

“So, how were things when your father left?”

I smiled and doodled on the calendar of my miniscule desk. “Good enough that I hated to see him leave so soon. We could use some more time. I think I’ll like this father much better.”

“God still does miracles,” she assured.

“Yes, He does.” I thought about the visions I had experienced. Conrad had encouraged me to speak the truth. These visions had already made me bolder in encouraging others. I found myself speaking at times I never would have before. Was I having an effect? Was I doing something significant?

 

****

 

Wednesday morning I found Marilee seated at the table in the employee lounge. There was some type of inhaler lying on the table in front of her. Her eyes were closed, and she was inhaling slowly through her nose. Lately her coughing had become more frequent and worse. Wheezing sounds emitted from her chest and throat.

“Marilee? Are you all right?”

She opened her eyes and nodded. She patted her throat.

“Having a bad morning?”

She nodded again.

Unexpectedly a scene appeared before my eyes. Marilee stood in front of me. Her eyes shone bright with no dark circles. When she breathed, she no longer wheezed.

“God, along with my doctor, urged me to quit smoking. My doctor told me that I would still have to deal with the COPD and with the coughing and wheezing, but God has rewarded my obedience with a miracle. The doctor says that is the only explanation. I’m healed—healthy. I’m blessed with a new life!”

When the vision ended, I dropped my purse and keys on the table. I sat down in the chair next to Marilee and scooted near her.

“Marilee, you just have to quit smoking.”

I knew I sounded as if I was pleading. Maybe I was.

“Addy, it wouldn’t make a difference now.” Her voice was low and raspy. She shrugged.

“But, what if you knew that God would reward your obedience with restored health? Wouldn’t you do it?”

“That’s impossible.” She shook her head.

“May sound cliché—but nothing is impossible with God.”

“I appreciate your advice, Addy. Really I do. I just can’t.” She abruptly left the room. I slumped in the chair. I remembered Conrad’s reaction when I suggested that there are blessings never received due to disobedience, and I felt the sorrow I saw on his face that day. I would have to try harder the next time the opportunity presented itself.

 

****

 

“… and the Bible study members were met by a totally transformed Sherri.” I told Griffey as we chatted over our normal Friday morning drinks: coffee and diet coke, respectively. “Sherri apologized profusely for her overexcitement as she shared the plans for her upcoming seminar. Everyone appeared quite excited. I could tell by their words of support and offers of help.” I knew Sherri was headed for blessing because of her obedience. That cheered my dejected spirit somewhat.

“But, I don’t know how else to encourage Marilee. It’s so frustrating and heartbreaking to think of the blessing she is passing up.” I fiddled with my soda can.

“Hon, you can encourage her, but in the end, it’s her decision.” Griffey, who had listened intently, now spoke as he stirred his coffee.

“I know, but …”

“I guess you’re getting a taste of how God must feel when He wants to bless us, yet we reject Him.” He raised his brows and nodded. “You know we must grieve His heart so often.” His words were punctuated with a heavy sigh.

“I know!” I pushed back from the table and rose to gaze out the window positioned over the stainless steel sink. “I’ll just pray for a miracle. I’ll pray that God will go ahead and heal her.”

“You’ll be disappointed.”

I spun around, my mouth hung open. This lack of faith coming from a man I thought dripped with it. I sat back down and looked him in the eyes. “What do you mean?” I crossed my arms over my chest dramatically. “God can heal her.”

“Sure He can, but He won’t bless disobedience.”

I sighed, deflated. “You’re right. You’re right.” I could no more force God’s hand or any other human than the prophets from the Old Testament who received visions. I wanted to tell God, “No more visions.” I felt so totally helpless to affect the change that was needed.

Griffey smiled and stood, giving my forehead a peck. He rinsed his coffee cup and placed it into the dishwasher. He leaned on the counter and tilted his head looking at me. “Doesn’t mean you can’t pray for God to convict her, or she’ll have a change of heart.”

Later as Griffey and I were at the market, his cell phone rang. Not that a call was surprising, since he was a minister. He was always on call, just like a doctor. He often had to abandon the dinner table or even leave in the middle of the night. I guess that was even more than a doctor might experience. God had helped me over the years to deal with little interruptions. He’d broadened my patience and mercy.

“Hello? Oh yes, Jimmy, is everything all right?” He stepped away from the grocery cart, and I searched my coupons for breakfast cereals. I moved up the aisle studying the choices, but I still could hear the one-ended conversation.

Jimmy and Hope had been praying for a child for so long. I smiled to myself as I recalled the vision I had experienced concerning them.

“Mmm…last night. That’s great… Can’t wait!” Griffey ended the call and turned to tell me the news.

I couldn’t wait. I blurted out what had been revealed in my vision. “It’s a boy, eight months old, named Jeremiah, right?”

Griffey’s mouth fell open. He shook his head and rolled his eyes. “That’s not fair!”

“Fair or not, I can tell you, they’re in for more blessings.” I smiled and raised my brows. I knew my grin reached ear to ear, but I didn’t feel I should share about the pregnancy. That would be the young couple’s news. But, was that the only reason? I was trying to deny the slight feeling of doubt. How could I doubt now when so much had happened? Of course, it wasn’t God I doubted, or was it? Doubt—what an ugly word and feeling.

 

****

 

On Sunday morning I could hardly wait for Jimmy and Hope to arrive so I could meet Jeremiah face to face. I busied myself by straightening the welcome center in the vestibule. At that central location I could catch them even if they headed toward the nursery. I weeded the out-of-date notices and inserts lying haphazardly on the desk. I’d just stacked the freshly-copied bulletins into three equal piles when they entered the church, all three were beaming. I stepped from behind the desk to get a better look.

“Hey Addy, this is Jeremiah,” Jimmy said. His voice was full of pride. He turned the baby in his arms so I could see the infant.

“Hey, Jeremiah.” I tickled his chubby belly and was rewarded with a giggle.

“Isn’t he beautiful?” Hope said, holding to the new diaper bag slung over her shoulder.

“Yes, he most certainly is! How’d he do last night?”

“Great,” Hope said with a telling yawn.

I patted her arm lightly. “You take care of yourself.”

She nodded looking a little puzzled. There was quite a crowd gathering to meet Jeremiah, so I moved on toward the nursery. I hummed all the way there.

“Addy?” Beatrice was rocking, alone in the darkened room as I entered.

“Yes, Beatrice.” I clicked on the light switch.

I dreaded to hear what I had done wrong now or what news I should impart to her. I tried to keep my facial expression neutral.

“I’m sorry.” The words rushed out after a moment of silence. “I didn’t mean to sound so awful. I just want the best for all my babies and their mommies and daddies. I get carried away…” Her eyes brimmed with unshed tears.

“It’s OK, Beatrice.” I crossed the room and stood by her side, placing my arm around her shoulders. “We all lose faith sometimes. That’s why we’re here—to encourage one another.”

“I’m sorry for being so snappy at you. You’ve been such a friend to me, and I couldn’t do without your help here in the nursery. You are truly a good pastor’s wife.”

I wasn’t worthy of her labels. In fact, I had no response. Her praise surprised me.

As elated as I was after Hope and Jimmy’s blessing, the feeling was short-lived. As I thought about Dr. Reeves and Marilee, I couldn’t help but feel defeated. My encouragement was not enough. Both had made their decisions. They would miss the blessings God had in store for them.

It hurt to know Marilee’s health would decline. It troubled me to know that not only did Dr. Reeves’s decision affect himself, but it also affected others—others he would have ministered to.

That was the first time I considered how a person’s obedience or disobedience might not only affect themselves but others as well. If someone obeyed, that meant others would also receive a blessing. However, the opposite would be true if the person was disobedient. Not only would that decision affect the individual but also those who would have benefited. It was sobering.

 

****

 

Wednesday evening Griffey was still in a meeting after choir practice finished. I propped up in a pew to wait. I didn’t notice Garrett Norton praying at the altar until he rose. He looked burdened as he walked down the aisle my way.

His head jerked my way, obviously not knowing I had been sitting there. “Addy?”

“Hey, Garrett.” He stopped at the pew in front of me. “Are you OK?”

He just nodded. “Guess you spend a lot of time waiting for Pastor Griffey.”

“Yeah, I do.”

He turned to walk away, but spoke softly.

“At least it’s an honest way to spend your time.”

“Garrett, is something wrong?” I could see the worry that weighed him down.

He turned back and joined me on the pew, hands gripping the seat edge.

“Addy, I know God would want me to quit my job.”

“Quit your job?”

“Yes. I took this job because I needed one so badly after being laid off. I have a family to support! But, I’ve seen the boss cut corners—illegal stuff.” His voice lowered at the end.

“Oh Garrett—you’re right. God would never approve of staying some place where that was happening.”

“I know, but my family …”

I’m not sure if he finished his statement. I never heard it, because I suddenly saw Garrett in a classroom of young children. He was walking among them wearing a huge smile on his face. A man in a suit motioned him to the side.

“Mr. Norton, the school board has voted to offer to pay for you to complete your teacher training. We want you as a teacher here if you’ll accept.”

“Of course! Thank you.”

The scene lapsed in time. Garrett stood in a similar classroom. A young boy stood next to him.

“Mr. Norton, you’re my favoritist teacher.”

“Thank you, Zach.”

The vision ended, and I leaned toward Garrett.

“Have you ever worked with kids?”

His head jerked back and his brows rose. “Why, yes, I loved it, but …”

“You should go back. You can’t honor God by staying and supporting sin. I think blessing awaits you teaching elementary school.”

“How did you… you’re right. I’m going home to talk to Rhonda right now. Thank you.” He stood and practically sprinted down the aisle.

I had a little praise session right there in the pew. By the time Griffey finished his meeting and found me, I was close to bursting.

“You’re normally not happy after waiting for me so long. What’s up?”

“Tell you in the car.”

When we were finally alone in the car, I told Griffey all about my conversation with Garrett and the vision.

“After being quite down about Marilee and Dr. Reeves, it was encouraging for Garrett to want to hear what I had to say. He’s headed for blessing.”

“Hold on to that during work tomorrow.”

“I’ll try. I’ll really try.”