The hall clock chimed three, and Willow lay encased in ice packs. Audrey had been bathing her forehead with cool water, a priceless commodity until recently. Suddenly she straightened, unable to endure another moment of waiting. “I’m going downstairs. Does anyone need anything?”
The doctor, Tucker, then Eli refused the offer. Copper dozed in a nearby chair, her injured foot propped high.
Sadie met her at the bottom of the stairway wearing her sleep bonnet. “Is the poor girl worse?”
“It would seem that way. The doctor is with her. I need a breath of fresh air.”
“Why don’t I fix you a nice cup of hot tea?”
“No, thank you, Sadie. I just need a little air.”
“Then I’ll sit with you.”
“But it’s raining.”
“I won’t melt. Done proved that days ago.” The woman drew a shawl around her nightgown. “Shall we sit on the stoop?”
Audrey followed Sadie into the damp night air.
“Heard a ruckus earlier and feared that Willow might have worsened.” Sadie sank to the damp step. “How bad is it?”
“Bad.”
Sadie shook her head. “Such a pity.”
“Sorry if we bothered you. We’ve been going back and forth to the icehouse. Willow’s fever is dangerously high.”
“Poor little one.”
“I have this need to do something, but there’s nothing I can do.” Audrey slumped against the concrete step.
“Wait on the Lord. That’s all a body can do.”
“Oh, Sadie. How do you stay so firm in your faith? You never waver.”
The woman pulled her wrap closer. “I’ve had my share of doubting, but I’ve walked with the Lord for quite a few years now, and if he’s taught me anything, he’s taught me his way ain’t my way, but his is the best way, whether I can see that or not.”
The distance in the older woman’s voice convinced Audrey that she was now lost in personal thought. Finally Sadie sighed. “I know what you’re going through. Losing someone you love is hard. I had a husband once. Lost him in a mining accident; lost my daughter to the influenza, and my son to snakebite. There were many a time I felt like folding up. There weren’t no reason to go on living, but God’s kept me here on this earth, and I’ve found out some days aren’t so bad anymore. Don’t know why he cared to keep me around—he knows there were times I’ve begged him to take me. Land, girl, I’ve been to the end of my rope so many times I prayed for someone to saw off the limb, but the good Lord’s held tight. You might think he’s forsaken you but he hasn’t. You have to bury that assurance deep in your heart and hold on during the storms because there’s one thing I do know for certain, there’s going to be storms.” She suddenly stood up. “And you’re right. It is raining too hard to sit out here. I’m drenched to the bone, and the last thing this household needs is another patient. Come inside, dear. We’ll make coffee and take it to the men whether they want it or not.”
It was nearing four A.M. when the two women climbed the stairs to Willow’s room bearing a tray of coffee and cups. Audrey opened the bedroom door, and Sadie carried the tray inside and deposited it on a table. She filled cups with the dark, fragrant brew, and Audrey deposited them into hands that automatically wrapped around the cups’ warmth.
Straightening, Sadie whispered. “I’m going back to the kitchen and do the only thing I can do: pray. If you need anything, just let me know.”
Her words brought comfort. It seemed to Audrey that the woman’s prayers might reach higher than hers. God heard all of his children’s pleas, but it did seem as if Sadie, with all her life’s sadness, might have the Lord’s ear.
Eli set his cup aside and abruptly left the room. Audrey heard his heavy boots descending the stairway. Despair engulfed her. When he was near she could cope. When he wasn’t she was adrift.
Willow moaned, drawing all attention to the bed. She appeared to have calmed somewhat. At least she wasn’t so restless, and the agitated twisting and turning had eased. Dr. Smith stood beside her, alert to her state. Tucker held her hand. She seemed to respond to his voice and his touch in a way she didn’t for the others.
The doctor had dressed Copper’s ankle, and told her to keep off it. She sat in a chair, keeping vigil.
Footsteps sounded on the stairs, and Eli returned, followed by Caleb. Tucker lifted his head, acknowledging their presence. Caleb rested his hand on his cousin’s shoulder for a moment before going to stand by the window. Audrey’s heartbeat quickened. Why had Eli gone for Caleb? Did he sense the end was very near?
Caleb spoke quietly. “Eli says she’s quieter than she was.”
Nodding, Tucker shifted in the chair. “The fever’s still high.” His eyes indicated the sheet of ice encasing Willow’s body.
“It could be the sickness, or it could be her body fighting off the blow. We just don’t know,” the doctor said.
She moaned, and the heartbreaking whimper sucked the air from Audrey’s lungs. Excusing herself, she stepped outside the room and sank to the floor, tucking her skirts around her legs.
A shadow fell over her, and she looked up to find Eli standing above her. After a moment’s hesitation, he slid down to sit beside her, their shoulders touching. They sat in companionable silence. Audrey supposed he didn’t feel like talking any more than she did.
Why would God take Willow when she was needed by so many people who loved her? Sadie and her losses rose to her mind. All right, God. I’m through fighting and questioning. I surrender Willow to you. She belongs to you, not me. Your will be done.
A sweet peace crept through her. The sting of loss lingered, but she could let go now. She leaned forward, resting her head on her up-drawn knees. In the end, she didn’t have a choice.
She sat deep in thought, unaware that Eli had moved. She glanced up to see him carrying a rocking chair. He put it beside her. “Here, it’s softer than the floor.”
Audrey shook her head. “I’m fine.”
He bent and scooped her into his arms, ignoring her protests. For a moment she lay cradled against his chest, her cheek brushing the rough shirt fabric before he deposited her onto the cushion. She leaned back, eyes closed, afraid to look at him for fear he’d see the love and longing in her eyes. Love that could only add to his burden. How she hoped and prayed that he wouldn’t permit life to pass him by before he emotionally buried his wife. Tate needed a mother: Eli needed a wife and helpmate.
He needed her.
She needed him.
They’d made strides in their relationship, but not enough to please her. Would there ever come a time when she could walk into his arms and be welcomed there?
Why torture yourself? If Willow died, she would fulfill Willow’s wish and marry Tucker, if Tucker would have her. It would be years before he was ready to love again.
Years.
She might very well be an old woman by that time, and the promise would go unfulfilled. No one would have her, and yet there was only one she would open her heart to.
Outside, the storm howled and raged like a restless predator. Audrey had come to despise the sound. It was as though the storm was the enemy, come to snatch Willow and sweep her away.
No sound drifted from the sickroom except for the heavy wind banging a loose shutter.
She slipped her hand into Eli’s, feeling his fingers close around hers. They sat, waiting. She couldn’t bear this lonely vigil alone. If you must take her, God, please do so swiftly. Tucker can’t bear any more.
Eli got to his feet, favoring his right leg as if he had a cramp from sitting too long on the hard floor. Darkness lifted outside. She sat staring at the early gray daylight that gradually shone through the hall pane, but her mind and heart were on the struggle going on inside the bedroom. Willow’s illness had opened her eyes. Life was short, and filled with purpose.
What was her purpose? She didn’t seem to have one. No matter what she attempted, she failed. And Eli…what was his purpose? To raise Tate alone? To exist in an empty life when Tate grew into a man and took a wife of his own? What would Eli do when his mother passed, and there was no one to look after Tate? Hire some stranger to see to the boy’s needs?
Caleb stepped into the hallway. “Doc Smith says you’d better come.”
Audrey’s gaze shot to Eli, fear blocking her throat. He reached out a hand to pull her erect. Then with his arm around her waist, he turned her toward the doorway. She closed her eyes. She couldn’t go into that room—could not witness her best friend’s death. From Caleb’s grave expression, she knew the summons could mean nothing less.
Her hand tightened in Eli’s. “You can’t put her in the icehouse. Not with all those others…It’s cold and damp and animals can get in there. Promise me that you won’t put her in the icehouse.”
“Shhh,” he soothed, and drew her closer to his side.
Willow lay quietly, no longer twitching or moaning. Shadows thrown by the kerosene lamp danced across the ceiling. Copper quietly sobbed.
Tucker stood by the bedside, haggard, tears rolling down his cheeks. Caleb leaned against the wall, arms folded. Eli gently eased Audrey closer to the bed, holding tightly to her shoulders. His warm breath fell on her ear. “She’ll be at peace. I try to think that someone she loves will be with her to take her hand and walk her to the other side.”
Audrey nodded wordlessly, her heart melting. Hot tears slid down her cheeks. Willow looked like an angel resting among the white sheets. Beautiful. Serene…so utterly peaceful, and if she knew her friend, at peace with God.
Hours or maybe only minutes passed. No one said a word; all eyes fixed on the still form lying on the bed. The faint rise and fall of her chest confirmed that life’s flame still flickered.
An explosive blast of thunder jarred the house. Windows rattled. Copper muffled a moan. Audrey caught her breath, feeling faint. The sound never ceased to startle her.
Willow’s body jerked. Her eyes opened, and she blinked. “Blast that thunder!”
Tucker gave a hoarse cry and dropped to his knees beside the bed. Dr. Smith poured a glass of water. “Lift her to a sitting position.”
The room exploded with relief. Everyone spoke at once.
Tucker slid his arm behind Willow, gently lifting. The doctor held the glass to her lips, and she drank greedily. When she lifted a hand to feebly push the glass away, Tucker lowered her head back to the pillow. Dr. Smith rested his hand on her forehead. “Your prayers have been answered. The fever has broken.”
Audrey sagged against Eli. Copper slid off the chair and limped over to join the group at the bedside. “She’s going to live. Really?”
“Surely she will,” Audrey whispered. God wouldn’t take her now after giving them renewed hope, would he?
The doctor began removing the ice packs. “Let’s get these wet sheets off the bed and get her into dry clothes. She’s soaking wet.”
Tucker lifted Willow, while Caleb and Eli stripped the bed. Audrey brought fresh sheets, and they spread them over the mattress, tucking in the ends and sides. Then the men stepped outside while Audrey changed Willow into a dry nightgown. As soon as she allowed the men back inside, Tucker sat down in the bedside chair, reaching for Willow’s hand. She gave him a drowsy smile before dropping into a normal sleep.
Dr. Smith shrugged into his coat and rested a hand on Tucker’s shoulder. “She should be all right now. I’ll stop by later in the day.”
Tucker reached to grip the doctor’s hand. “Thank you. I’ll never forget what you’ve done.”
The doctor shook his head. “I didn’t do anything. I’ve never felt so helpless in my life. All the credit belongs to the Lord.”
Once the doctor left, Caleb helped Copper to her room. Tucker sat watching Willow, his features haggard with relief and lingering concern. Audrey tiptoed away to allow him privacy. He didn’t need her or anyone else now. Willow would live, and Tucker would be just fine. More than fine. He’d be a happily married man soon.
And Audrey was no longer obligated to marry a man she loved, but not the romantic way.
She followed Eli and Caleb downstairs, thanking them for their help. When they left, she went to the kitchen. Sadie sat in a chair drawn up to the table, head down on her folded arms, sound asleep. Audrey touched the older woman’s shoulder. “Sadie?”
She lifted her head, features white with strain. “Yes?”
“The fever broke. The doctor thinks Willow’s going to be all right.”
The older woman’s face lit with joy. “That’s wonderful, love! I knew he’d bring her through. God is good.”
Audrey nodded, smiling. “That he is, Sadie. He is extremely good.”