Nathan

Nathan was barely aware of his brothers shouting all around him. The disgust he had felt only a few moments ago at Jack’s confession was eclipsed by fury with Sarah. How long did she know, how long did she keep this terrible secret from him? He had thought he could trust her… He had thought wrong.

Erik and Thomas were arguing about what was best to do with Jack. They didn’t know what could be wrong with him, to make him think he could ever possibly love a Wolf, but Thomas suggested he might have caught whatever was wrong with the Wolves.

“Maybe it manifests differently in Bears,” he argued. “It’s still madness either way. It’s really the same. He needs to be quarantined until we can find a cure.”

“We can’t quarantine him—we need him,” Erik said. “Even if he is sick, he’s still the best hope we have of finding the cure. We need to keep him working on those records.”

Nathan turned away as Thomas began expounding on his theory. Jack and Sarah had vanished from sight, and he had no desire to see either of them. Not wanting to be in the same room as Sarah, he headed back to the spare medical house they’d used at first before both moving back to his home. He’d sleep here until… he didn’t know when.

He didn’t sleep that night but lay awake listening to the arguments all over camp, some siding with Thomas, others with Erik. Erik would have the final say, of course, but he knew Thomas was good at what he did and would be reluctant to disregard his advice.

The next day, Sarah and Jack were at breakfast. Nathan glared at the back of her head as she turned away from him, probably in shame at what she did.

It wasn’t an official meeting, but once everyone sat down for breakfast, Erik stood up.

“Jack, I’ve decided to quarantine you until we can work out what’s wrong with you. Sarah, you’ll continue with the records to try to find a real solution to this problem.”

Jack hung his head; clearly, he had expected nothing less. Sarah, however, stood up. “You’re all mad,” she said angrily. “Jack isn’t sick because he fell in love! I know you don’t like it, but you’re going to have to accept it because it’s not just going away—and you shouldn’t want it to.”

The Clan was glaring mutinously at Sarah, and Nathan felt like disappearing into the ground. He had brought her here, vouched for her… and now this.

“Look, say he was sick. It doesn’t change anything! You need someone to mate with a Wolf, and Jack is willing. Your personal opinions on how they fell in love are irrelevant. The only thing that matters is fixing whatever is wrong with the Wolves.”

“You don’t understand,” Erik said curtly.

“You’re right, I don’t! Maybe someday one of you will explain it to me in a way I do understand, but for now, we need to move past this. You can argue all you like once the Wolves are back to normal.”

Erik glared at Nathan, clearly expecting him to do something. Nathan couldn’t even bring himself to look at Sarah.

“I think you should go back to the records room,” Erik said coldly. “Keep looking.”

Sarah glared right back at him and then got up and stormed off. Jack got up slowly. “I’ll go with her. You want me away from you so you don’t get sick, and if humans could catch what’s affecting the Wolves, they’d have it already.”

Nathan hadn’t thought of that, but Jack had a point. Unless Sarah had already caught what he had and that’s why she was acting so crazy.

Eventually, Erik let Jack go, and Nathan followed at a distance. Spending the night away from Sarah had left him weak and shaky. He needed to be near her again. He leaned against the far wall of the records house, knowing that Jack would be able to hear him there, but at least Sarah wouldn’t. He could clearly make out their voices coming from inside.

“They just need time,” Sarah said, but she sounded upset.

“Time won’t help,” Jack replied dully. “I told you, they hate me now. They’ll never accept Michelle. I should never have said anything.”

Nathan expected Sarah to respond encouragingly, to insist that everything would be okay, but instead, he heard her sigh heavily. “Maybe you’re right. The way Nathan looked at me… He’s never looked at me like that, like I’m the enemy.”

Nathan could make out the subtle sound of Jack patting Sarah on the back, and for a long while, they didn’t speak again.

Nathan stayed outside the records room all day, listening. He told himself he did it because he needed to gain some strength back before he could get away from Sarah again, but as the hours went by, that excuse became less and less true.

“People used to fear Shifters a lot more than they do now,” Sarah said. “Remember what we learned in history? How Shifters were hunted down and executed? Yet now we all manage to live together in relative peace. And all those Bear-Wolf wars in these records, yet you’ve been at peace with them for centuries.”

“Yes, but those prejudices took generations to get rid of, and even now traces of them are still here.”

“Well, we don’t have generations,” Sarah said firmly. “We’re on a tight schedule, but we know from history it’s possible.”

Nathan tuned out, thinking hard. Was Sarah right? Was this just an old prejudice? Was he being as irrational and unfair as all those people who feared Shifters simply because of what they are?

Sarah’s next words jolted him out of his thoughts. “There’s a chance we won’t be able to persuade them. If that happens… we’ll have to go it alone.”

“What do you mean?”

“As I said, we don’t have generations. If they don’t come around, we may have to break off and go after Michelle ourselves—do the mating without the rest of the Clan.”

“That would be next to impossible,” Jack said, and Nathan silently urged him on. No way was he letting Sarah walk into the death trap that the Wolf camp had become without him. “We’d have no backup, no one to protect us from the other Wolves while we found Michelle, no one to help us keep her contained…”

“I can fight,” Sarah said calmly, though there was a tremble in her voice. “You focus on finding Michelle, I’ll ride on your back and keep the Wolves off you.”

Nathan squeezed his eyes shut, fighting the urge to scream. There was no universe in which he would allow Sarah to run into such a dangerous situation without backup. She and Jack were utterly mad, but he knew Sarah. Mad or not, if she decided that she needed to go it alone, she would find a way to escape whatever way they used to try to contain her.

His heart sank as he realized what he had to do. She was going after Michelle whether the Clan came or not, and he couldn’t let her go without the protection of the Clan. There was only one solution…

“Erik, we need to talk.”

“Please tell me you have some ideas.”

Nathan took Erik’s arm and led him away from the other Bears. “Listen, the idea of a Wolf and a Bear mating is… horrific… but what if Jack’s not sick? What if, as impossible as it seems, he’s really in love with this Michelle?”

“Impossible,” Erik said at once. “No Bear in their right mind would fall for a Wolf.”

“It’s happened before,” Nathan said, and Erik glared. There was an unspoken agreement not to talk about that sordid part of history. “Remember when the Shifters were being persecuted by humans?” Nathan pressed. “There weren’t enough of us to survive, we had to mate with each other if we wanted the existence of Shifters to continue. They did it out of obligation… but some of them really fell in love, it’s all in the records.”

“That was different,” Erik said angrily.

“Yes, it was, but face it, Erik, what options do we have? Sarah and Jack were acting weird for days before they told us. They must have searched for other solutions. You saw Jack’s face. If there were really any way other than telling us about Michelle, he would have taken it.”

Erik struggled for a response for a moment. “So… So, you’re suggesting we go through with this?”

“I… I don’t know. I don’t know what’s right… but I know people are dying, and I can’t see another way out of this. If Jack really is willing, who are we to stand in his way when it could save everyone?”

Erik muttered under his breath, apparently thinking hard. “Okay. Okay, I’ll get Thomas to look at Jack. If he can prove that Jack really isn’t sick, that this is actually a choice he’s making in his right mind, then… then we can think about moving forward.”

“Think about it?”

“I may be the Alpha, but this is a decision I can’t order the rest of the Clan into following. Either we all agree, or we don’t do it at all.”

All things considered, Nathan thought this was the best he was going to get for now. “That sounds good. You talk to Thomas. I’ll start talking to the others and try to get them to change their thinking a bit.”

Nathan looked expectantly at Erik, who didn’t move. “Erik, we’re on the clock here,” he snapped. Erik reluctantly turned toward the healing circle with a doom-laden expression. Of course, Erik didn’t know just how truly urgent their situation was. Not only were hundreds dying every day, but if they didn’t hurry, Sarah might soon be joining them.

Nathan spent a few hours debating strategy. Obviously, the best thing to do would be to approach Sarah, get her to help him persuade the Clan, as she had persuaded him without even knowing it… But he couldn’t face her just yet, couldn’t face her anger and hurt, which—as much as he didn’t want to admit it—were justified.

He’d shouted at her, told her he didn’t want to look at her, without even listening or giving her a chance to explain, without trying for a second to see it from her point of view. He knew he needed to apologize, but he dreaded facing his own mistakes, facing the possibility that she may not forgive him.

Instead, he went to Gareth and started working on him. “Erik has a plan. He’s going to get Thomas to examine Jack, see if he’s really sick.”

“Of course, he’s sick,” Gareth said. “What else could the explanation be?”

“We don’t know, but we need to know if he’s in his right mind. If he’s not, we can’t take anything he says seriously. If he is…”

Gareth looked uncomfortable. “He isn’t. Thomas will prove that. Jack is sick and needs help.”

Nathan didn’t know whether to hope he was right or not.

Gareth seemed to spread the news because before long, the entire Clan was gathered around the healing circle. Jack looked hesitant as Thomas led him in, as though expecting everyone to start shouting at him again. Sarah didn’t look hesitant; she looked scared. Nathan hated to see that expression on her face. He longed to hold her and whisper that everything was going to be okay.

Sarah didn’t meet his eyes, and he forced himself to look at Thomas. If he was honest with himself, he was half hoping Jack was indeed sick, that the sick attraction he had with a Wolf was nothing more than a bizarre symptom.

“Jack, we need to do some tests,” Thomas said. “We need to see what’s wrong with you—if… if anything.”

The Clan mumbled uneasily at these last words, but Thomas ignored them. “On the table, please, Jack.”

Jack obeyed, lying down on the flat, raised stone slab that had only recently been cleaned of Nathan’s blood. Thomas started with the standard tests, simple things the rest of the Clan could do in an emergency.

When these revealed nothing, he moved on to more complex spells, burning certain herbs and having Jack balance rocks on his stomach while he breathed. The rest of the Clan was soon set to help working, making teas with special properties, getting certain woods and roots to burn in the fire…

Hours later, Thomas was sweating and looking frustrated. Jack looked worn out, but slightly hopeful. No matter what Thomas did, he couldn’t find even a hint of Jack being sick. He wasn’t giving up yet, though.

“It could be a mental illness,” he said, straightening his shoulders. Nathan grimaced in sympathy. He knew Thomas hated delving into others’ minds. They seldom had to do it. Mental illnesses weren’t nearly as common in Shifters as they were with humans.

“Get the stuff ready,” Thomas said wearily. “Gareth, you get the bone altar. Erik, I’ll need a link, something of Jack’s. Jack…” Thomas turned to him. “I can only do this if you’re willing, I can’t come in if you don’t let me.”

“Do what you need to do,” Jack said with a bravery Nathan fervently admired. “I’m not sick. Do whatever is necessary to prove it.”

It was evening by then, and the Clan one by one set lit candles by the bone altar. Nathan didn’t know what went through Thomas’ head as he went through the ceremony, which gods he was calling on for help, but he could see when it happened. The light went out of Thomas’ eyes—he was gone from his body.

Jack jerked slightly, and what felt like a gust of wind passed Nathan’s face.

“What’s happening?” Sarah whispered.

Nathan moved over to her side. “Thomas has entered Jack’s mind. It’s how we treat mental diseases. He goes to the source, finds the sickness, and cures it from the inside.”

“Is that safe?”

“Safer than the alternative. Human drugs don’t work on Shifters. Don’t worry, Thomas is excellent at what he does. Jack will be fine.”

Sarah gave him a tentative smile and Nathan’s heart leaped. Her hand crept into his, and together, they watched Jack’s motionless form.

Nathan’s legs started getting tired, but he didn’t move, didn’t take his eyes off Jack. The palpable air of danger was all around them. No one spoke.

Sarah tugged at his arm. “He’ll be fine, won’t he? You said he’ll be fine?”

With difficulty, Nathan tore his eyes away from Jack to look at her. “I trust Thomas, but this isn’t just about trust or skill. Going into someone’s mind is unpredictable and can have disastrous consequences. That’s one of the reasons Thomas will never do it if the person is unwilling, even if he’d be saving their life. The risk is high, even if the mind he’s in is cooperating.”

“What could happen?” Sarah’s voice was higher than usual, and her eyebrows were furrowed in worry.

“Nothing has ever happened with Thomas, though even he has only done it a few times. There have been accounts of the healer being lost in the Bear’s mind, never being able to get out. It drove them both mad. Or sometimes the healer damages something without meaning to, and leaves the Bear changed, usually for the worse.”

Sarah clutched at his arm. “Nathan, that’s too dangerous! Jack isn’t sick, we don’t need to go to such extremes. Tell Thomas to get out.”

“I can’t,” Nathan said and raised his hand to forestall her as Sarah opened her mouth to object. “Thomas is deep in Jack’s mind right now. Trying to pull him out now could be catastrophic for both of them. That’s one reason that when this is done, we all stay to witness it. If anything happens here, we need to make sure it doesn’t reach them, doesn’t distract either from the dangerous mental dance they are in.”

“So, you mean if the Wolves attacked now…”

“We’d die before we let them near Thomas and Jack.”

Sarah looked frightened and shuddered.

“Don’t worry too much, though,” Nathan said with effort. “As I’ve said, Thomas is excellent, and he’s never had any problems.”

His words were true, but he couldn’t keep the worry out of his voice. No matter how good Thomas was, minds couldn’t be predicted or controlled. He’d once described it as going down a rollercoaster without your seatbelt attached. You could be tossed to your death at any moment.

He didn’t think this analogy would comfort Sarah much, so he kept quiet. He hadn’t realized how close she and Jack had become—probably closer since the whole Clan turned against them and for that short time they only had each other.

Sarah shivered and leaned into him. Nathan wrapped his arm securely around her, pulling her into his warm body. In the distance, they could hear the sound of howling. He wondered if Jack’s Michelle was out there. The flames of the fire flickered as they waited.