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ATTUNEMENT

Overview

“Always Be Closing.” This cornerstone of the sales cathedral, often referred to as the ABCs, has been rewritten by the author as the new ABCs of moving others: attunement, buoyancy, and clarity. In Chapter 4, Pink defines and examines the skill of attunement—the ability to connect harmoniously with others—by its three governing principles: increase your power by reducing it, use your head as much as your heart, and mimic strategically. Research shows that it is the person with a balanced personality, known as the ambivert, who can most effectively master attunement and is therefore the most successful at moving people.

Chapter Summary

During the heyday of information asymmetry, the motto of predatory salesmanship was “Always Be Closing,” or ABC. But the era of relentless-pressure selling is over, no longer effective in these times of information symmetry. Pink offers a new ABC of sales, conveying the three essential qualities useful in moving others: attunement, buoyancy, and clarity. This chapter deals with attunement, defined as the ability to harmonize actions and perspectives with those of others in a given context—to see from others’ perspectives. This attunement, or perspective-taking, follows three key principles: (1) Increase your power by reducing it; (2) Use your head as much as your heart; and (3) Mimic strategically.

1. Increase your power by reducing it. A sense of power blocks attunement. To be skillful at perspective-taking, it’s necessary to assume the position of less or no power, since the best perspective-takers—according to social science research—are those with inferior status. By taking on a lower-status position in an encounter, sellers are more apt to see others’ viewpoints and be in a position to move them.

2. Use your head as much as your heart. Initiating encounters with an assumption of having less power is a cerebral rather than an emotional skill, as perspective-taking is not the same thing as feeling empathy. Perspective-taking may be used in tandem with empathy, but the cognitive act of perspective-taking has been proven to be the more effective of the two. Having empathy, though, is handy in building enduring relationships and defusing conflicts. Someone skilled at this second principle of attunement recognizes that people are not solo units but are connected by relationships to others in specific contexts, which can activate a seller’s social cartography—the ability to “size up” or “read” a group or a person and adjust one’s style accordingly, a strong example of being attuned.

3. Mimic strategically. Attunement with others is deepened by the physical acts of mimicry and touch. Because humans are quicker to trust those who resemble themselves, subtle mimicry has been shown effective in achieving trust, and thus attunement. Mimicry of manner and vocal patterns are cues that communicate understanding and reduce the emotional distance between people. If mimicry is not performed deftly, however, and people become aware of it, they will turn wary. Studies have shown that a light touch placed on the forearm of a customer during a verbal exchange increases effectiveness in sales transactions.

The Ambivert Advantage

Despite the common presumption that extroverts make the best salespeople, there is scant evidence to support the claim. In fact, neither extroverts nor introverts are the most successful at moving others. Research shows that ambiverts, those in the middle of the personality spectrum, are best at sales—whether traditional or non-sales selling—because they respond to others in a balanced way, knowing when to put forth and when to hold back. Personality test scores indicate that most people are ambiverts; Pink argues that this fact supports his premise that all people, to some extent, are born to sell.

Chapter 4: Key Points