Ali slammed the door, locked it and stormed down the hallway toward the bedroom. How dare he? Who did he think he was? She threw her purse onto the chair and stepped out of her shoes. Just for good measure, she bounced one of them off the wall. That man made her so damned mad.
First he charged in on his white horse as if he had every right to come to her aid. Then he demanded—demanded, mind you—she move back in with him. Once he had her hopes up for a possible reconciliation, he told her she’d have to move out again once this was all over. She heaved her second shoe across the room. Thanks, but no thanks, buster. God damn, she deserved more respect than that.
If she were going to be on her own, she’d have to start learning to be independent.
The sob burst from the deepest part of her soul. She threw herself onto the bed. Harsh, wracking sobs tore from her, exhausting her, draining her. Her life was careening out of control. She’d allow herself this brief moment of self-pity, but that was it. She had to gain some semblance of control over her future.
Mark was obviously finished with her. Fifteen years down the drain, but she couldn’t spend the next fifteen years wallowing in the past. It was time to move on.
When she was completely cried out, left empty and hollow, she sat up, grabbed a box of tissues and then dragged herself to the bathroom. She stood under the warm spray, the steam enveloping her, blocking out the pain and the reality of the outside world. Little by little the tension drained from her muscles, leaving her tired and sore. She stayed in the shower until the water turned cold. Then, cursing, she got out and toweled dry.
She ignored the ringing phone while she dressed. Ignored it again while she made a cup of tea. But, once she was finished with her pity party, scrubbed clean and comfortably settled on the couch, she checked the caller ID when it began to ring a third time.
Kendra. A brief pang of conscience tugged. Kendra would have heard about the accident and been worried. She picked up the phone.
“I’m fine,” she answered, anticipating her friend’s concern.
“Where have you been? I’ve been trying to call all afternoon. Since Calvin came back from the courthouse and told me what happened, I’ve been worried sick.”
Kendra was just getting warmed up. If Ali didn’t interrupt the flow of complaints soon she’d be listening to it for an hour. She loved Kendra, was grateful for her concern, but didn’t have the energy left to listen to it.
“I’m sorry, Kendra. I should have answered. I should have called you.”
Apparently soothed by the apology, Kendra relented. “Are you really okay, honey?”
Ali sighed. “Yeah, I’ll be fine. I decided you’re right, though.” She replayed her earlier conversation with Mark.
“I’m sorry. I know you really wanted things to work out between the two of you. Men are jerks.”
It felt good to laugh. Kendra could always pull a smile from her. “Thanks, Kendra, that’s just what I needed.”
“Do you need me to come over?”
Ali could hear the kids yelling in the background. “No. Thank you though. I’m all right.”
“You’re sure?”
“Positive. Besides, don’t you have plans tonight?” Ali knew Kendra would cancel her plans with her husband, but she’d been looking forward to their date night all week.
“Yes, but you know I’ll be there if you need me.”
Ali smiled. A surge of warmth rushed through her. “I do know, and I appreciate it so much. I’ll be fine. Now go, have fun. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
She massaged her temples in an effort to ease some of the pounding. I never should have gotten out of bed this morning. Dimming the lights in the living room, she headed toward the bedroom. Her thoughts turned to Joe and the conversation they’d had the night before. It had been fun talking to him, getting to know him. She hesitated, caught her lower lip between her teeth and ran back to the living room for her laptop.
With the pillows propped against the headboard and the comforter tucked around her to chase away the chill, she logged into Anonymous. 3 new messages. The third one was from Joe. She smiled and deleted the other two without even reading them.
She opened Joe’s message.
I had a great time last night.
Hmm…so had she. I had a great time too. Should she say more than that? What more could she say? She hit send then minimized the Anonymous website and brought up her e-mail. Time to get some work done. She opened a message from Calvin and began sorting through the list of things he wanted her to take care of in the morning.
Ding.
Her heart skipped a beat. She set the e-mail aside and returned to Anonymous. Joe waited in a chat room. Hi.
Hi, yourself.
Ali grinned. How are you?
Not bad. How about you?
I’m doing all right. It surprised her to realize she really was.
So, what do you enjoy doing?
Her fingers hovered above the keys. Wow. What did she enjoy doing? When Mark left, she’d immersed herself in work. Wait. Was that true? Hadn’t she been consumed by work even before he left? She’d struggled to climb her way up in the firm since she first landed the job. When was the last time she’d taken the time to do something she really enjoyed?
Are you still there?
I’m here. Okay, maybe she could go about this a different way. What would she enjoy doing if she had time? I like going to the beach. That much was true. A few years ago she and Mark had spent Fourth of July at the shore. They’d played in the surf like teenagers, joined a volleyball game and barbequed hamburgers for dinner. Then, while the sun had dipped slowly behind the dunes, they’d walked hand in hand with the waves lapping at their feet. She shook off the memory.
What about you? What do you enjoy doing? For a minute she didn’t think he’d answer. She adjusted her pillows and snuggled deeper under the comforter.
I work a lot and don’t get much free time, but I think I’d enjoy traveling.
That sounds like fun. I wouldn’t mind traveling if I had time. Only to warm places, though, I’m not too fond of the cold.
Me neither. So, skiing is definitely out, but cuddling by the fireplace would be nice.
Ali sucked in a breath. Images filled her mind. The two of them snuggled together on the couch, an afghan thrown over their feet, flames dancing in the fireplace, snow swirling outside the windows. She curled closer to him and looked up into his eyes. Mark’s eyes. Ugh…couldn’t she get him out of her mind for two minutes?
She turned her attention back to Joe. It would be very nice.
When the phone rang an hour later, she figured it was Kendra calling to see if she’d changed her mind about having company. She picked it up absently while continuing to talk to Joe. “Hello?”
“Next time, I won’t miss.”
She sucked in a breath. Icy fear charged through her veins.
* * *
Mark strode through the door, intent on convincing Ali to go home with him. She was on the couch, lost in the blanket she’d wrapped herself in. Ron stood over her, his notebook open.
“Are you all right?” He approached her warily, unsure of what to expect after their earlier blow up.
She shrugged, and the vulnerability in her eyes tugged at his heart, clutched at his throat and strangled him. He couldn’t help himself. Wouldn’t have stopped had he been able to, which he wasn’t. He went to her, pulled her up from the couch and folded her into his protective embrace.
“I’ll be outside.” Ron caught Mark’s gaze before he left. The other man’s expression was serious, eyebrows knitted together, the anger emanating from him a punch to the gut. This situation had escalated out of control.
Ali didn’t pull away, as he’d been afraid she would. Instead, she leaned into him, allowing him to comfort her, protect her, and make her feel safe. He could give her that, even if only for a little while. The door clicked behind Ron, and Mark pulled her even closer.
The scent of strawberries tickled his nose, and a flash of memory jumped out at him. He was lathering her hair with the strawberry shampoo she always used. She relaxed into his touch as he massaged his fingers over her scalp, down her neck… It was a nice memory, a random moment they’d spent together on a lazy weekend morning. The heat started in his stomach and burned through his body. When she looked up and her eyes locked onto his, he was lost.
His lips crashed down on hers. He moved his hands up to cradle her head and pushed his fingers through her hair. He couldn’t get close enough to her.
“Damn it, Ali, I’m sorry.” He reined in his runaway emotions. Holding her away from him, he studied her eyes and found only acceptance and love. “Come on.” Taking her hand in his, he turned and started down the hallway toward the bedroom.
“Mark…wait.” Her hesitation confused him, but he stopped and turned to her.
“What’s wrong?” Her hands were so cold. He tried to rub some warmth into them while he waited for her to continue.
She caught her lower lip between her teeth, drawing his gaze to her full mouth. Desire flared.