The Melting Pot Poets

The poetry of America is the poetry of inclusion; the poetry of celebrating that great American slogan “E Pluribus Unum.” “Out of many, one.” Yes, everyone living in our land should be included under the proud rubric “American”—be he or she Christian, Jew, or Muslim, rich or poor, white, or even, yes, even black. (And, in the case of possessing proper official documentation, even of Mexican origin.) This is the credo of the Melting Pot Poets.

Bill O’Reilly

b. 1949

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Talk show host Bill O’Reilly, in one of his more sensitive pieces, lyrically explores a revolutionary concept: Black people can sometimes act almost like white Americans.

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Dey Jes’ Like Us!

I couldn’t get over the fact that there was no difference between

Sylvia’s restaurant and any other restaurant in New York City.

I mean, it was exactly the same,

even though it’s run by blacks,

primarily black patronship. . . .

There wasn’t one person in Sylvia’s who was screaming,

“M-F-er, I want more iced tea.”

Chris Matthews

b. 1945

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News anchor and political commentator Chris Matthews similarly explores this important blacks-are-just-like-whites theme and he does it in an intensely personal way.

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To Barack Obama with Love

You know, I was trying to think about who he was tonight, and

it’s interesting:

He is post-racial by all appearances.

You know, I FORGOT HE WAS BLACK

tonight

for an hour.

Wolf Blitzer

b. 1948

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News announcer Wolf Blitzer, on the other hand, demonstrates that he is not color-blind. Not at all. But he sure is compassionate about those folks.

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You simply get chills every time you see

these poor individuals . . .

many of these people,

almost all of them

that we see

are so poor

and they

are

so black. . . .

Rod Blagojevich

b. 1956

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In this charged empathetic work, former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich goes beyond color blindess to truly BE black. (Ed note: Blagojevich is white.)

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Black Like Me (with Apologies to John Howard Griffin)

I’m blacker than Barack Obama.

I shined shoes.

I grew up in a five-room apartment.

My father had a little laundromat

in a black community

not far from where we lived.

I saw it all growing up.

Rush Limbaugh

b. 1951

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Is there a role for the new immigrant in the melting pot that is America? Here our poet-broadcaster, Rush Limbaugh, says ¡si!— and proffers a time-honored solution.

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Mexicanos Estupidos

If we are going to start rewarding no-skills and

STUPID PEOPLE

I’m serious,

Let the unskilled jobs,

let the kinds of jobs that take absolutely no knowledge whatsoever to do,

Let stupid and unskilled

MEXICANS

do that work.

Trent Lott

b. 1941

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Former Senate Majority Leader Trent Lott addresses the problem of undocumented Mexican immigrants in a very different way—by poetically proposing an electric fence. Much like ancient Greek fabulist Aesop, he uses animal imagery to convey his point. Can you guess who the goats are?

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Electrified Fences Protect America: An Aesopian Goat Tale

People are

at least

as smart as goats.

Now one of the ways

I keep those goats in the fence is

I electrified them.

[Moral:] Once they got popped a couple of times, they quit trying to jump it.

Jamie Dimon

b. 1956

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From J.P.Morgan chief Jamie Dimon comes this bold and touching plea for tolerance for another oppressed and hated group.

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Can’t We All Get Along?

Well, not all bankers are the same.

And I just think this constant refrain “bankers, bankers, bankers,”

—it’s just a really unproductive and unfair way of treating

people.

And I just think

people

should just stop doing that.