This book exists only because the Holleran family has placed the duty of public service above their pain. A thank-you to each of them, as well as to Madison’s friends, who provided invaluable insight even while processing an unthinkable loss. To everyone I spoke with: thank you for your time and willingness to share. A special thank-you to Bob and Meg Weckworth, who knew and loved Maddy, and who now run the Madison Holleran Foundation: if not for them, the meaning behind this book would be muddled. Thanks also to Bob Gebbia and Christine Moutier of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention for their guidance on how to respectfully tell Madison’s story.
My own family and friends provided support throughout this process, offering advice and counsel when needed. My mom, Kathy, my dad, Chris, and my sister, Ryan, were generous with their time and energy, and the love of my life, Kathryn, heard me discuss the ideas in this book for two years and never fatigued. (I love you, GC.) Thanks to the team at Little, Brown, especially my editor, Vanessa Mobley, as well as Kait Boudah, Carina Guiterman, Ben Allen, Katharine Myers, and Craig Young, for believing in this book’s importance, and to my agent, Michael Klein, who helped shepherd this story to the proper home. Many people helped shape this book, including Jay and Gay Lovinger, as well as my mom, who read everything I sent her within minutes. I am eternally grateful to my best friend, Shawna Hawes, for… everything, always. Last but not least, a huge thanks to espnW, specifically Alison Overholt and Laura Gentile, for shaping the original story, and for supporting me throughout this process.