Chapter Nine

 

Alice ran as silently as she could from the horridness she had heard from her father’s study. She had come down to collect a book from the drawing room to take back to her room when she overheard voices in the study. She had not meant to eavesdrop, but the door was ajar and she found herself unable to close her ears to the words they said.

Had she heard correctly? How could she have been so foolish? She had told herself many times during the time she and Lord Blackmoore had spent together that he was a rouge and a scoundrel and that she should do everything in her power to keep away from him.

There was no doubt she had done this deed to herself. When she should have been listening to her mind, she allowed her heart to take control. Well, never again! She was tired of men feeling as if they could control every part of her life.

As she looked out onto the garden, her eyes filled with tears, she caught sight of her mother strolling slowly past the beds, stopping periodically to pluck a dead flower from a plant. The woman was unhappy, that much was clear, for whenever she thought no one was watching, she stared out the window or walked along the path as she did now, a sadness to her eyes that clenched at Alice’s heart. How could the woman insist that her daughter marry when she herself was so miserable? It made little sense to Alice.

As unhappy as her mother was, Alice wondered about her own sensibilities. Was she as unhappy as her mother? She did not feel as such, but would she become so if she were to marry, especially a man the likes of Lord Blackmoore?

Her mind returned to Thomas as it often did without calling the thoughts forward.

“You are strong and yet defiant! Wild as the red hair that flows around you,” Thomas had said with a smile one day when she went to visit him in the stables. Her mother would have been apoplectic if she knew Alice spent a good amount of time talking with the young man who had stolen her heart, but Alice found it difficult to keep her heart under control.

“So, you do like my hair?” she replied in feigned shock.

He laughed. “Of course, I do.” He moved in close to her and wrapped his arms around her. “Like everything else about you, it is beautiful,” he whispered and then moments later their lips met with their first kiss. And what a kiss it was, the sensations strong, her heart filling with even more love.

“One day, I will marry you, Miss Alice,” he said, “and we will run away together to a far-off place where we can live the rest of our days in each other’s arms.”

“Oh? And what kind of woman will I be in this far-off place?”

He laughed and returned to shoeing the horse. “Be who you are. Adventurous, daring, kind. And yet continue always to make me laugh. That is who you are.”

Alice wiped the lone tear from her eye and pushed away the thoughts. “You are right, Thomas, as you always are,” she whispered. Then taking a deep breath she let it out slowly. The past had been like a blur as the chain around her heart had loosened. Now, however, as she had predicted in the beginning, it lay shattered with the vase that had fallen in the hallway outside the study. What irony it was that she should knock over something naturally when she spent so much time doing such acts for so long intentionally.

It was at that moment that she realized that she had become a woman of little aspiration. Her life followed a predictable pattern, one that even the most dimwitted could achieve. Where had her desire for adventure gone? Where was her love of life?

The answer came to her at such high velocity, it almost knocked her back. It had gone away with Thomas the day he had left her behind.

She swiped at her cheeks and straightened her back. “Well, no more,” she said to the empty room. Some things were destined by fate, but others were in her control. No more would she allow her parents to lead her life, nor would that wretch of an earl, for that matter. She was her own woman, and she would once again embrace that bold and daring woman who had hidden herself away for too many years.

Under her bed she kept a small traveling bag, and she pulled it out and began stuffing it with a few items she would need for her journey. Where exactly she was going, she was unsure, but one thing was certain—she was leaving Glassberry Estate. She paused for a moment, a pair of bloomers in her hand, and stared at the dark sky. She and Thomas had spoken numerous times of running away to Cornwall where he would shoe horses while she ran her own millinery. That was where she would go: Cornwall. That was where her dreams would come true.

A new confidence fell over her as she placed an extra gown and a few other personal garments into the bag. She listened at the door for sounds of anyone moving about, and when she heard no one, she slowly opened the door as she attempted to balance both the bag and a candle in her hand. The family, as well as the servants, would all be abed at this hour, so she had little worry about running into anyone as she tiptoed down the passage and made her way to the kitchen. There she gathered a loaf of bread, a small block of cheese, and a few scones. Although she would have loved to take a small jar of jam, she pushed aside the idea. It would take too much time to get it together and make it ready for such a long travel.

Next, she moved to her father’s study. Leaving her bag on the floor just outside the door, she shoved the candle into the room to determine that it was indeed empty. Then she made her way to the book where her father hid his notes. Guilt rushed through her as she reached up and removed the book from the shelf. She was not a thief, but the small coin purse pinned to the inside of her skirts would not get her far. She would need enough money to find accommodation as well as a place to set up her shop. Because her father would not like to see her suffer, she knew he would approve of the fact she meant to invest his money in a business venture, thus she pushed aside the guilt and removed all but a few notes from the book and shoved them into her small handbag that hung from her wrist. That would be enough to get her started in her new life.

She quietly closed the door behind her, the tiny light from the candle flickering in the holder. Then she picked up the bag and made her way to the back door. When she opened the door, the tiny breeze extinguished the candle, but she did not need light to find her way to the stables. She had made the trek many times, even when the moon hid behind the clouds.

Inside the stables, she lit a lamp that hung on the wall. In no time at all, the black and white horse was saddled with her bag tied to the back and Alice was mounted. She looked up at the house that had been her home all her life. She had many memories here, both good and bad, but now it was time for her to make new memories.

The moon shone brightly on the road that led away from Glassberry Estate. “A good sign,” Alice whispered to her horse. “Now, let us follow that light into our new lives ahead.”

Soon she could no longer see and the world itself lay before her, ready to accept her for the woman she was. She would be free—free from her parents’ control, free from the peering eyes of society, and most importantly, free from the treacherousness of Lord Johnathan Blackmoore.

***

The sun was just breaking over the horizon when Alice crested at the top of a hill and stopped to watch the sky glow, the red and orange reminding her of a warm fire burning in the fireplace back at Glassberry Estate. She had been much too excited to sleep, and she was certain her mother would not check on her for at least another hour, perhaps two; thus, she would have a very good head-start on any search party sent out to retrieve her. Even if Mrs. Huntington found Alice’s bed empty, she would not send anyone in search of her for quite some time.

However, despite her earlier excitement, Alice’s countenance now waned, and she knew she would have to stop to rest before she was overwhelmed with exhaustion and fell from her horse. However, she could not stop at an inn. Although she had ridden through the night and had avoided the main roads, she did not want to chance someone recognizing her this close to home. Instead, she would have to find a soft patch of grass where her horse could graze and rest as she slept. At least the sky was clear; how horrid it would have been to be caught in a rainstorm on this, the first adventure of her life. How sad that thought was, to be on her first outing alone so far from home at the age of four and twenty. Her cousin Anthony had journeyed often on his own when he was younger and often returned with wonderful stories of his adventures. Alice, however, was never allowed to venture beyond the gardens alone. Now, however, she felt as free as a bird in flight, and the feeling was absolutely wonderful.

In a few days, she would be in Cornwall and there she would begin the process of starting her new life. She had enough money to secure some sort of shop space, and she hoped decent accommodations, but if she was required to sleep in the shop itself, she would do so. If there was one thing she had learned during her probing of her father’s books, it was that one could achieve great financial success if one was able to save at every turn.

A small creek came into view and Alice stopped to allow the horse to drink its fill. As she stared across the empty field on the other side, her mind turned to Thomas and their conversation when she brought up the idea of marriage.

“But everyone’ll always know you’ve come from a better class than me,” he had said. “Doesn’t that bother you?”

She had laughed at his innocence. “No, it does not. Besides, I can dress like a more common woman if need be. And you, my handsome man, will have to teach me to speak more like you.”

Alice smiled at the memory and then squatted down to fill her canteen. Though she had taken enough money and food to last the journey, she had forgotten one simple thing. Appropriate clothing. Her dresses were not common; in fact, they were far from it. What she currently wore would catch the eye of anyone she encountered. She looked down at her blue muslin gown, the tiny yellow flowers smiling back at her. It spoke of high quality and wealth, which in turn would make her conspicuous. No, she needed something more appropriate for a woman of lesser means, which would allow her to blend in with the common people.

She mounted the horse once again and it was not long after when she came across a cottage with clothes drying on a line. Two dresses appeared to be her size and were most certainly made from a lower-quality fabric than the gown she wore. After biting at her nail for several moments, Alice made the decision to make an exchange: her gown for the two dresses. It was more than a reasonable exchange, for her gown was worth five times as much as even one of the dresses.

After tying the horse to a nearby tree where it could not be seen by the resident of the cottage, for a large bush grew next to it, Alice sneaked past the bush, glanced around, and did not see nor hear anyone. She tiptoed to the line, pleased that she could help such a poor person in this way. Not to mention that the owner of the dresses would be helping Alice. It was a more than reasonable arrangement.

“Oh, Thomas, if you were here, you would give me better counsel than I am giving myself,” she said in frustration. Perhaps she should simply knock on the door and offer to make the exchange with the woman of the house. However, Alice could not bring up the courage to do such a thing, so instead, she removed the two dresses. Then she glanced around once more. When she saw no sign of another person about, she quickly removed her gown and hung it where the two dresses had been.

“There, now I have made restitution for what I have taken ten times over. The dresses I have gained will be much better for me in Cornwall.” Now dressed only in her shift, she sneaked back to where she had hidden her horse, glanced back from around the bush and seeing that no one had followed her, released the breath she had been holding.

As luck would have it, both dresses were completely dry, and she stuffed one into her bag and the other she pulled over her head not caring when her hair fell loose. An ample amount of bosom showed, but it was more due to the fit than the fashion or cut. She glanced around and stifled a giggle; if anyone caught her in such a state of undress, her mother would have given her a tongue-lashing. Her breasts were constrained to such a degree, she thought for a moment they would burst out of their confines. The material scratched and reminded her of a flour sack. However, despite the fact the dress was made of burlap and not muslin, it would serve its purpose, and quite well.

“You see, I am not a thief. Two common dresses for one of great quality is quite the bargain,” she said aloud as though hoping to hear approval. Then, she mounted her horse once again and rode away, happy with her new clothes.

An hour down the road, fatigue plagued her. The horse followed the creek and she let him have his head until she came across a patch of soft grass where she halted the horse, tied him to a tree that stood beside the bank and allowed the animal to graze and drink its fill. She pulled out the other dress she had taken, this one a blue linen, placed it on the ground as a covering, and lay down to look up at the blue sky.

Several scenarios ran through her mind as she created a story to explain the fact she traveled alone. Depending on the person with whom she spoke, she could change the story to fit her needs at that time. This would not only keep her anonymity safe, but it would also delay anyone finding her.

She slept for several hours, and when she woke once again, the sun had passed its zenith. Her stomach rumbled, reminding her that she had not eaten since the previous night, so she tore off a hunk of bread and a bit of cheese. The small canteen she had taken from the stables, more than likely left by one of the stable boys, allowed her to collect water from the creek to drink. However good the bread and cheese tasted, or how cool the water felt on her throat, she found herself wishing she had a nice cup of tea and one of Cook’s cakes.

“You are on your own now, Alice,” she scolded herself. “You will eat what you have and be happy with it. Soon, you will have your own millinery, which will produce your own money. Then you may have your tea and cakes.” The idea brought on a renewed vigor, and she was soon back on her horse and riding away into a bright and exciting future.